Country Roads

"You're welcome," Eric said, making sure to smile as he waited for Jordan to look at him again. "So are we good?"

"As long as you forgive me then...yes."

"There's nothing to forgive, so you can go back to the house and get some rest."

Eric got up, moved closer, then held out a hand. Jordan looked at it then looked at him and put her hand in his. He helped her stand up them smiled again and told her he was glad they talked.

"Me, too," she said in a sweet way that was unlike anything he'd ever heard her say.

He pointed to the door that was maybe eight feet away then laughed.

"May I walk you out?"

Jordan finally laughed herself then told him he could.

Once they got to the door, she turned toward him and thanked him again for being so kind to her and for being so understanding.

"We all need to work through things. I'm just glad I was there to listen when you needed me."

"You mean...be abused...right?" she teased as she looked up at him.

"Nah. Not at all."

Once again, Jordan's arms were suddenly around his neck, but this time it felt different. He went to hold her, too, but just as his arms wrapped around her body she lowered hers and moved back.

"Well...goodnight," she told him.

"Night."

He opened the door, but just before she stepped out, Jordan asked him something.

"Eric? My mom's cough. Is there something I should know?"

"Oh. Um...perhaps she's the one you should ask," Eric gently suggested.

"Sorry. I should have known you wouldn't talk about anyone when they aren't there."

She smiled then said, "That's something else my father taught me and I lost track of."

"He was a smart man."

"Yes. Yes, he was," she replied before walking away.

When Eric walked into the kitchen the following morning he could tell something was different. There wasn't a sound other than bacon sizzling and dishes being placed on the table.

"Morning," he said politely as he took off his ball cap.

"Hey there," Jean said before coughing.

"Mom! I just don't understand! How can you not do anything? You have a grandchild for heaven's sake!"

Eric noticed Mia wasn't in the room and pieced together that Jordan had asked her mother about the cough.

"Jordan, I told you why last night. Please respect my decision."

"What decision?" Mia asked as she walked in.

"It's nothing, sweetie pie," her nana said as she stared down her daughter.

"Eric? Can't you talk some sense into my mom?" Jordan pleaded.

"Mom? Why are you so upset?" Mia asked.

Unable to stay silent, her mother said, "Because your grandmother wants to die!"

Within seconds Mia was crying, Jean was pleading for quiet, and Jordan was still tearing into her.

"Okay, ENOUGH!" Eric called out, using his Army, outdoor voice for the first time since Afghanistan.

Only Mia's sobs were audible as the kitchen fell silent.

He then used his indoor voice and quietly said, "What any other adult says or does is none of my business. But the three of you need to talk this out and make peace with whatever you decide."

He then grabbed a plate, loaded it with food, and filled a travel mug with coffee then put a lid on it.

"Now if someone will please open the door, I'll let you ladies hash this out."

As angry as she was at her mother, Jordan almost smiled when she put Eric's ball cap back on his head.

"You might need this," she told him before opening the door.

He thanked her then said, "Mia? Everything will be okay. Just tell your mom and grandmother how you feel, okay?"

She didn't know what was going on but nodded and said, "Okay," as Eric went back 'home' to eat in peace.

It was an hour later before Jordan showed up to help with the cows.

"You're a pretty amazing man," she said the moment she saw him.

"Me?"

"We talked until about two minutes ago, and my mom is going to check into chemo."

She moved a little closer then said, "Eric? I can't thank you enough."

"I didn't do any of the talking. That was all you and your daughter."

"My mom knows how much Mia needs her. And the truth is, so do I. I couldn't have admitted that until I thought I'd lose her, too, but now the thought of her dying is unbearable."

"She still might," Eric offered as nicely as he could.

"Yes. I know that's true, but I don't want her giving up without a fight. For all of our sakes."

He smiled at her then tilted his head a bit.

"What? Why are you looking at me like that?" she asked, genuinely puzzled.

"Because you're the amazing one and you don't even know it."

"Oh," she replied quietly as she broke eye contact. "I...I feel like...the broken one."

Eric waited for her to look at him again then smiled.

"I'd say you're on the mend."

"I've got a ton of mending left to do, but coming...home...has changed my perspective."

She smiled then told him if she could sing, she'd sing Country Roads.

"But I can't so I'll spare you," she said with a laugh.

But when Eric started singing it, her smile disappeared, replaced by shock. He wasn't just signing, he sounded...fantastic.

He stopped after the first few bars, but it was so good Jordan told him to keep going.

"You sure?"

"Yes. I'm sure," she said so quietly he barely heard her.

She stood there mesmerized and listening as he sang the entire song in an amazing baritone voice she couldn't have imagined.

"You are full of surprises, Eric Harmon."

"At your service, ma'am," he replied as he tipped his cap and winked.

Jordan laughed, and this time it was a real, genuine laugh from the heart, and although she didn't share her feelings, she was beginning to realize that she not only felt happy again, she felt...almost whole. She knew she hadn't been alone long enough to feel like this, but the truth was, that's exactly how she felt.

The mood change was so noticeable that Eric found himself looking forward to being around this older, beautiful woman from then on, and he even made excuses to see her whenever he possibly could during the day.

Later that week he insisted that Jordan go with her mother to discuss treatment options, and while she was happy to do so, she promised she'd be back as soon as possible.

"No hurry. The farm isn't going anywhere," he told her with a laugh.

She smiled kind of coyly then said, "Maybe it isn't the farm I'm anxious to get back to."

When Eric took off his cap and started scratching his head Jordan started laughing as she turned while saying, "I'll be back in a few hours!"

When she returned, Jordan was bubbling with enthusiasm.

"Mom's going to start chemo the day after tomorrow. And she said she'll do radiation, too, if the doctor thinks it's necessary down the road."

"I'm really happy to hear that, Jordan."

"Me, too," she said as she looked up into his eyes from a foot away.

There was a brief moment between them, but she looked away just when things got too close for comfort.

"So...where are we?" she asked as she looked around as if there might be something new.

Eric gave her a serious look then said, "Baaaaa!" like a goat and Jordan laughed so hard she covered her mouth.

"Then let's...goooo!" she replied, trying to make the same sound without much luck.

She'd forgotten about the moment they'd shared until Eric put an arm around her shoulder. It was strictly platonic from his point of view, but when he did, Jordan stopped, stepped in front of him and kissed him so fast he had no idea how it happened.

"What the..." he said, not in anger but in surprise.

Jordan reeled back in horror, again covered her mouth but with both hands, and said, "Oh, my...gosh! Eric, I...I am SO sorry. I...you must...I didn't mean to..."

When she realized he was just standing there staring at her she stopped talking for a moment then said, "Aren't you going to say anything? Or at least yell at me?"

"Yell at you? Why would I yell at you?"

"For...losing my mind?"

He kind of cocked his head to one side then side, "If that's what you do when you lose your mind, you can go crazy anytime you like."

Now it was Jordan staring at him.

"Are you...you're not..."

"What? Flirting with you? Me?" Eric said, pointing at himself with both hands.

"Right. I'd have to be out of my mind to think that's what you were doing."

"Okay. You keep telling yourself that," he said so playfully it made her body tingle from head to toe.

As they walked toward the goats, Jordan realized he had been flirting with her. It was just playful flirting, but it still felt wonderful.

But by the end of another very long day those feelings were gone, and she reminded herself that Eric was just an incredibly nice guy who'd had this uncanny ability to make her feel good. And while he was much too young to be serious, he was so good looking it made her feel even better to have such a 'hunky' guy doing the flirting.

As they said 'goodnight' around 10pm, Jordan thanked him for making an older woman feel good.

"Oh. Did your mom tell you something nice?" he asked, a smile on his face that told her he knew she talking about herself.

"No. The other older woman," she said, loving the playfulness.

"There's another older woman? Huh. Maybe you can introduce me to her one of these days," Eric replied with a smile that made her very tired body shiver.

"Oh, sure. I'll do that."

As she walked inside, Jordan was still exhausted but she had that same feeling back and this time she wanted it to last. Her mom and daughter were both in bed asleep, but even as tired as she was, Jordan couldn't lay down. She took a long, hot shower then sat in her favorite chair with a cup of tea and replayed the events of the day in her mind and smiled several times as she did.

But by midnight, when she was finally tired enough to go to sleep, she concluded once again that Eric was just being friendly. That thought was both realistic and depressing, and the only good news was that she fell asleep with a minute of laying her head on the pillow.

The next two or three weeks were a blur for Jordan as she found herself taking her mother to various doctors starting with a new, complete baseline evaluation then for treatment as well as for medication to combat the nausea induced by chemotherapy.

Mia needed her help with schoolwork, and she also needed her mom to talk to about new friends she'd made, teachers she liked or didn't care for, and all the things daughters talk about with their moms. Jean did her best to fill in, but Mia needed her mom, and Eric had been so understanding that it made her...love him even more even though she only loved him as a friend.

But as she thought about him, Jordan knew how much work he did, and she also knew that every time she had to be gone to help her mom or her daughter, he had to pick up her share of the work. She'd gotten stronger and knew the routine inside and out, and between them, they were occasionally finishing by 8pm, but with her being out, Eric was back to working 12 hour days—always without complaint.

The thing that she found so amazing was that he not only never made her feel guilty, he was supportive to the point of insisting she take time off even when the need to do so was questionable.

"You only have one mom, Jordan, and while I hope she beats the cancer, you don't know how long you have with her. So go," he would often say.

What she'd perceived to be flirting continued, but it was more subtle, and the subtlety served to reinforce her belief that he was just a very nice man who maybe saw her as the older sister he'd never had. Not that Eric would flirt with his sister. It was just the best analogy she could come up with.

The weather starting cooling down in September and turned cold in early October, and cold was one of the reasons she'd left West Virginia. It seemed ironic that she loved Aspen, but she'd never had to work outside there, and the only time she was ever outside for any length of time in the cold was when she went skiing at one of their three resorts.

But in spite of her misery, Jordan did her best not to complain, and as November arrived, her mother got the first good news since the original diagnosis.

"Jean? Your tumor has shrunk nearly 50%. That means it's now small enough that we can operate."

To be safe, the oncologist would have to remove one of her lungs as removing only the tumor left too much chance the cancer would return. It could do that anyway as even a PET scan couldn't pick up every cancerous cell, and if even a few of them migrated to her liver or God forbid, her brain, it could very likely mean the end.

"How much more time will that buy me?" she wanted to know.

"I'd say a minimum of six additional months, and there's a modest chance this could lead to remission."

"With remission meaning five years," Jean rightly observed.

"Yes. So...one to five years...or maybe more."

"Mom. You have to do this. For us," Jordan told her. "For Mia."

Jean now loved her granddaughter more than anything, although things were nearly back to normal with her daughter, so the decision was easy.

"Okay. Let's schedule the surgery."

That night, Jean asked Jordan for a few minutes of her time, and her daughter asked what was up.

"I want to talk to you about something."

Jordan sat down first followed by her mom.

"I don't hold grudges, honey, but I want you to know that after you left...and the way you left...it...it hurt both me and your father. A lot."

Jordan already knew that and had come to terms with her actions, so she didn't say anything.

"And Eric has been nothing short of a godsend."

"He is. He's an amazing man, and he loves this place like you and Dad did."

"Yes. Yes, he does, and that's why..."

Jean put her rough hand on her daughter's then said, "That's why I changed my will and am leaving him the farm."

She watched her daughter's eyes for any hint of anger but didn't see any. In fact, Jordan's reply was so unexpected it made her mother tear up and have to look away.

"I would have done the same thing, Mom. Just being your daughter doesn't entitle me to anything, let alone this land. I abandoned you and Dad, and I'm just grateful beyond words that you took me back. And for what it's worth, I am so, so sorry I hurt you and Daddy like that."

Jordan saw her mom's body jerk and she realized she was crying. She got up and went around the table and put her arms around her mom. Jean raised hers and hugged her daughter back, then said something that made Jordan cry, too.

"I love you so much, Jordan."

Jordan swallowed hard and somehow said, "I love you, too, Mom," then held her even tighter.

A minute or so later, when they let go of one another, Jordan asked if there was anything else.

"No. I just needed you to know that. In case...well, if I...don't wake up."

"Mom. Don't say that! You'll be fine."

Both of them knew that was probably true but not a given. Even so, Jean told her daughter she was right, smiled, then said she did have one more thing.

"Okay. What might that be?"

"Do you ever think about...Eric?"

"What?" Jordan asked, as she shook her head in disbelief.

"Eric. Do you ever wonder if maybe he and you could, you know, maybe be...more than just friends?"

Jordan's look softened as she said, "Mom. Look at me. I'm almost 43 years old. I wear flannel shirts and boots and I don't wear makeup. Eric is..."

Her mom smiled then said, "He's 28."

"Twenty...eight. Oh...my...goodness."

"Jordan? I see the way he looks at you. And I see the way you look at him. And don't try and tell me you don't, because I'm old but not blind."

Jordan would have argued the point had her mom not told her she noticed.

"I...I've noticed him," she replied. "But he's...28. And he's very handsome. But I'm..."

"You're beautiful, honey. And Eric doesn't care what you wear. And I think it would be a shame if you two didn't find out if there's something there."

"Mom, I don't want to embarrass myself and end up getting hurt doing it. I also don't want to risk changing our relationship and ruining the friendship we have."

"That's your decision, honey, but I think...even in spite of the age difference...that you two could, you know, be more than just friends."

"Maybe," Jordan said with a weak little smile more to placate her mom than to agree with her even though she had had the same thought a hundred times.

Eric had occasionally hired someone to help him out, and there was an 18-year old boy who'd recently graduated from high school who worked hard, and Eric asked him to cover for him the day Jean had the operation. Mia stayed home from school, and the three of them waited anxiously for any news after wishing Jean the best before they wheeled her into the OR.

As they waited, Mia was reading a school assignment on her iPad, and Jordan decided to probe just a little while leaving herself room to claim she was only kidding or joking.

"Eric? I had a talk with my mom a few days ago. About the farm."

"Oh?"

"I...I know she's leaving the farm to you, and I wanted you to know I agree with her."

"Wow. I've wanted her to say something to you about that since you came home, but it wasn't my place."

They were sitting next to her, so Eric smiled then asked, "So you're not angry with me?"

"What? No! Of course not. Why would I be? I gave up my right to this place when I left in a snit so many years ago. And you've been loyal and such a good friend to my mom."

Her heartbeat quickened as she put her hand on his then said, "And I can't thank you enough for that."

When he looked down at her hand, she assumed he was about to ask her what she thought she was doing, so she started to pull it away.

When she did, he raised his hand and took it and pulled it back down.

"Jordan? I can't tell you how happy I am you did. Come home."

She was only a foot or so away from him and his eyes told her he meant that.

"Me, too," she said. She squeezed his hand then added, "For several different reasons."

Her heart raced when he smiled and asked, "Is there any chance that one of those reasons could be me?"

"Hmmm. Maybe. I suppose it might even be at the top of the list," she told him as a flood of pleasure-inducing chemicals bathed her brain.

"So is there any chance you might want to maybe do something together one of these days?"

He smiled then laughed as he said, "You know, during all of our free time?"

Jordan also laughed and felt like she was 16 again as she said, "I would love to spend time with you."

When Eric raised an eyebrow, she laughed again.

"Oh, right. We pretty much spend ALL of our time together now, don't we?"

"We do," he said very quietly. "But that's not what I had in mind."

"Oh. Okay," she whispered back as he began moving her way.

His lips were less than an inch from hers when Mia saw them and sucked in a loud breath of air and said, "Mom! What are you doing?"

Eric stopped, Jordan sat up straight, and both of them let go of the other's hands and looked at Mia.

"Nothing, honey!" her mom said, hoping she hadn't done something terrible before also sayin, "Sorry!"

"Why?" her daughter asked.

"What?" her mom said, now very confused.

"I wasn't upset, Mom. I was just surprised."

"Meaning?" her mom asked.

"It's...okay if you guys want to kiss," she shyly told them, her cheeks showing more than a little bit of red in them.

"You...want us to kiss?" Jordan asked.

Mia's cheeks lit up like a stop light as she told her mom that was fine just as one of the doctor's from the OR walked up them.

"How is she?" Jordan asked immediately.

"She did very well. She's in recovery, and we believe we got everything."

Jordan was so relieved she teared up and held out a hand to the doctor. He kind of patted it then let them know she could have visitors in another or so.

"But only for a few minutes."