All Comments on 'Daddy Landlord'

by bnaylor987

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  • 10 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousalmost 4 years ago
Stopped reading and this is why ...

It started all nice and fine. Guy eats out, meets girl, owns building, helps her in distress. All right with that, but then he enters a locked place he had hired out in order to help himself to some of the food-items there. No landlord is allowed to do that in any case. I don't wanna be the lawyer here, but if he was friend with the owner, he might have given him a call: "Do you mind if I get in for some breakfast?" Problem solved. Next point: they are in and she immediately jumps at him ... that's too fast. And that's where I stopped to read this story. I won't rate this one or even give it a bad rating. The writing was fine, but you missed out in the story department. So please take this as suggestion for your writing in the future. Take your time, let the story develop. This is no porn clip channel where everyone is going straight for the fucking. We want some story around it and even though it is all fantasy, it has to make sense somehow. So please keep that in mind.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 4 years ago
Good

This must be much longer with lots of sweet action.

The ending is great! This story has a large potential.

DunkirkDunkirkalmost 4 years ago

Nate and monica should use their quarantine time to enjoy each other. Age should not become an issue

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 4 years ago
Mother Daughter

He should still both of them and get them 2 pregnant..

far_wanderer1984far_wanderer1984almost 4 years ago

Good plot twist at the end. Look forward to more.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 4 years ago
Only one course of action

bed 'em both.

bang 'em both.

breed 'em both.

repeat as required

Omart57Omart57almost 4 years ago
Great story

My friend! Looking forward to the next part!

bnaylor987bnaylor987almost 4 years agoAuthor
Thanks

Thanks for the comments and criticism. I am working on the next chapter, filling in some holes and hopefully setting it up for you to want more. I have not had a lot of time to devote to this- i have the story in my head and am working on getting the skeleton down in my draft stories and fleshing it out a little at a time. Keep checking back and hopefully you will like it!

Rancher46Rancher46over 3 years ago

Great plot, can't wait to read the next chapter. Well done 5 stars

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userbnaylor987@bnaylor987
Just a guy who started writing as a release. Liked to read stories here and thought I would add my 2 cents. Some stories are real and mine and some are real and belong to others, and some are just made up while driving. Hope you enjoy.

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