Danny and Elise Ch. 07

They sat in silence as Danny ate his McDonald's lunch in the fast-food joint's parking lot on their lunch break. He had tried to coax her into ordering something as well, but she didn't feel like eating. She had only nibbled on a few Saltine crackers before leaving for work that morning. She had no appetite to speak of.

"I'm sorry about this morning," Danny started after he had finished his last French fry.

"It's ok," Elise spoke quietly, eyes on the floorboard.

"No, it's not. I was upset. I shouldn't have talked to you like that. Will you please tell me what the hell is going on, though?" he spoke more gently than he had that morning. "I mean, if you want me to leave you alone that's fine. Well, it's not fine, but that's a whole other story," he waved his hands in the air the more words came out of his mouth. "If that's the case, though, just tell me and I will."

She could feel his eyes watching her and desperately wanted to be brave enough to return his gaze, but simply couldn't.

"It's not that at all," Elise shook her head.

"Then what?" she could hear the sincerity in his voice.

"It's hard to explain." She hoped he wasn't getting irritated with her for not looking him in the eye when she spoke.

"Will you at least try? You're," he paused a long moment. "You're worrying me," he quietly placed a hand on top of hers that were folded in her lap. "I'm not saying you are, but you don't seem like the type of person who is usually..irrational."

Elise scoffed and laughed, looking up, but keeping her eyes forward and squeezing them shut tight, already fighting another wave of tears off. She was sick of crying. It made her feel tired.

"I am being irrational," she agreed and took a deep breath. She may as well get it over with. If he thought she was crazy, that was that, if not, well...

"I had some really terrible dreams this weekend," she began. She saw Danny nod his head out of her peripheral. She focused on their hands as she spoke.

"I really, really, don't want to go into detail because I'm fairly certain I would die of embarrassment. But the first one started off nice. One of those dreams you don't want to wake up from, you know?"

He nodded his head in agreement, but didn't interrupt.

"It felt so real. Have you ever had dreams like that?" Elise looked him in the eyes at last.

"Yah, a few times," he offered.

"We were out in the woods, the middle of nowhere, by a creek and suddenly this giant wall of water sweeps us all away," she let her words sink in.

"Us all?" he finally asked.

"Forget it," she shook her head vigorously. Danny didn't push any further.

"Sounds horrible," he sympathized. Elise wondered if he realized he had begun rubbing circles with his thumb on the back of her hand.

"That wasn't even the really bad one," she trailed off, already sniffling, not wanting to relive Sunday night's nightmare again.

"Again, no details, but I watched you die," Elise suddenly and violently broke down in tears again. She pulled her hands away from his and buried her face in them. The worse thing than crying was crying like a baby in front of someone else.

"It's like I knew what was going to happen, but I couldn't do anything about it. I was right there with you, but completely helpless," her voice took on an angry edge.

"And it felt real too?" Danny questioned. She just nodded her head, face still hidden from him.

"Oh, Elise," he smoothed her hair back from her face.

"I'm sorry," she choked back a sob, finally looking at him again. She was past the hard part. Who cares what he thinks now, right? "You probably think I'm nuts, don't you? To get so upset over a dream," she spat scornfully. "Like a child. Over someone I barely know," she shook her head angrily.

"I think that would be upsetting to anyone, regardless of whether they knew the person or not. Dreams can be really intense."

"That's the understatement of the century," she scoffed again. "I can't look at you or think about you or do anything, really, without getting upset. You can't tell me that doesn't sound crazy," Elise stared into his chocolate brown eyes.

"Maybe a little, but I'm still here, aren't I?" he cracked a sly smile.

Her lips felt the soft warmth of Danny's before she even realized what she was doing. She felt him jump slightly at first, but otherwise didn't resist.

Her eyes were closed, but her hands found their way to the sides of his face. The beard tickled a little, but she liked it. Her kisses became hungrier.

A minute or two later, she assumed, for it felt as if everything going on outside of the truck had frozen in place, and she became acutely aware of the heavy breathing coming from both of them. Elise suddenly, yet reluctantly, pulled away, forcing Danny to make a weird face as he tried to figure out what had just happened.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," she leaned back to her side of the vehicle. "I shouldn't have done that."

"Why not?" was all Danny had to say.

"Because. It's not helping my case in the neuroticism department...Amongst other things."

"What other things?" his chest heaved, still working to catch his breath as well.

"Like, like," Elise suddenly became flustered. "The fact that we've only known each other a little over two weeks. The fact that I told myself not to rush into things. Yet here I am, rushing into things and telling you about my crazy dreams one second, kissing you the next and, and, I don't know why I'm yelling!"

They looked at each other, not saying a word a good long time until Danny finally couldn't force down the grin inside of him anymore. She could tell he tried to hold his laughter back, but it was no use. It was infectious and she soon joined him, both of them laughing hysterically as if the other had just told the funniest joke in the world. They could barely breathe by the time they finished. Danny looked at her with what could only be described as a longing in his eyes.

"You're gonna be alright, you know?" Elise didn't answer. "And I don't think you're crazy. I think you're great," he leaned in slowly and kissed her on the lips this time, tenderly, an undercurrent of warmth and good filled it. She never wanted to let him go.

"I've been wanting to do that since Friday," his voice was deeper than before. He held the side of her face.

"So listen, if nothing else, and this is probably kind of fucked up on my part, but I'm kind of flattered you would get so upset about me dying in your dream. Not that I like seeing you upset, of course, but you know." Elise nodded her head slightly, looking down at their hands again. When had they found each other again?

"And if we are rushing into things, who cares? Are there rules on this somewhere?"

"Me," she said meekly. "I care."

"Why?" Danny interrupted.

"Because honestly? I'm scared to death I'm going to mess this up. That's why."

"Why would you mess this up?"

She sighed heavily.

"Jesus, let me count the reasons. 1) I'm neurotic. 2) I get ridiculous bouts of anxiety. 3) I smoke when I'm stressed out. 4)..."

"Wait," Danny held up a hand. "You smoke?"

"See?! Case in point!" she pointed at him.

"No, no, it's not that. I just can't see you smoking. I mean hell, I haven't seen you smoking at work."

"I'm sneaky...Especially since I didn't want you to know," she turned her attention out the windshield. "Besides, it's not very often. Just when I'm extra stressed out or nervous."

"How many did you have before our date?" she caught the slightest quiver in his bottom lip as he tried not to smirk.

"Two. And just those made me dizzy, if that tells you anything," she said matter-of-factly.

"I'm sorry. I'm just giving you a hard time."

"I know you are...jerk," Elise gave him a sideways smile.

"Guess we'd better get back to work," Danny looked at the radio clock. "But before we head back, can we do just one more thing?"

"What's that?" she asked, completely unsuspecting.

"This," he leaned into her again, grabbing the sides of her face, and kissed her gently for a long, sweet moment. Elise could have melted into her seat.

This man is going to be trouble.

It was amazing what the human brain and sheer determination were capable of. Over the next week, Elise started re-training her brain. Every time she would start thinking about the nightmares, she made herself think of Danny's lips against hers, the kisses they had shared Tuesday in his truck on lunch. By the end of the week, she felt almost normal again...Which was good because things progressed quickly after that.

"Hey," Danny leaned casually against the edge of her work desk, as he had already become accustomed to doing in the few short weeks Elise had been there.

"What are you up to this weekend?" It was Friday afternoon and nearly time for them to clock out for the week.

"Like I've said before, do you want me to lie and make something awesome up or tell the sad, boring truth?" Plans? She never had plans. This should have been painfully obvious to anyone by now. She might work on a painting or read a book, maybe see a movie, but that always made her feel like even more of a loser, sitting there in the dark all alone.

"I'll take that as a, 'Nothing, Danny. Why do you ask?'" he did a horrible impersonation of a female voice. Still, Elise couldn't help laughing.

"Wow. That was quite possibly the worst imitation I have ever heard."

"I know. But seriously. You free this weekend?"

"Yes," she drew out. She hated talking about her personal life, or lack thereof, especially to Danny.

"What do you say we go see a movie?" he ignored her feigned exasperation.

"Sure," Elise paused. "On one condition."

"What's that?" he smiled, intrigued.

"We go out to eat or something afterward. It doesn't have to be fancy. Hell, we can just go get coffee, for all I care," she paused again. "You do drink coffee, don't you?"

"Uh, yah," Danny replied sarcastically. "I'm a 32 year-old man. Of course I drink coffee," they both chuckled. "Not that I'm complaining, but why the stipulation, out of curiosity?"

"Well, movies are fun and all, but I always thought it was kind of a strange date idea, especially early on. I mean, you don't get to talk at all, so you really don't get to know anything about the other person, you know? Which kind of defeats the purpose of dating, doesn't it?" Danny just stared at her, grinning, for a long moment.

"What?" Elise felt her cheeks flush, but not nearly as bad as usual, which relieved her. She hated giving her embarrassment and self-consciousness away so easily.

"Nothing," he shook his head, still smiling. "I like the way you look at things. That's all. We don't have to go to a movie."

"No, no. It's fine. I just," she paused for what felt like the millionth time in the past 5 minutes. She hated how girly and vulnerable speaking her next line out loud made her feel. "I just thought it would be nice to talk too," Elise glanced down at her keyboard before forcing herself to look him in the eye. It wasn't as hard to do as she imagined. She could see from his expression that he was an open book and his warm gaze seemed to welcome her in.

"Elise," his hand was suddenly on top of hers as he spoke more quietly now. "I don't care what we do. I just want to spend time with you." She felt an odd comfort every time they had touched so far. Removing his hand just as quickly, she longed for more of his touch.

"Ok," she replied shyly. An awkward pause hung in the air with Mary still at her desk across from them.

"Can I ask you something?" he leaned in a little bit further, still speaking softly.

"What's that?" Elise asked nervously.

"You've not really dated for awhile, have you?"

"I figured that was painfully obvious," she stated simply.

"Can I ask why? I mean, I know looks aren't everything, but you're gorgeous. You can't tell me guys aren't falling at your feet all the time." Elise blushed hard.

"You've got to stop saying things like that."

"Why?"

"Just...because."

"Because you get embarrassed? If there's one thing you should know about me, it's that I'm honest, to a fault, and call things like I see them. I'm sorry, but I'm going to tell you you're beautiful because you are. You shouldn't be embarrassed. Own it." The silence in the room was so deep you could get lost in it.

"Well, thank you," Elise did look down at her hands now. "Now's not really the time to explain my hang-ups, though," she looked towards Mary's side of the room.

"Well, we only have 5 minutes until we can clock out," Danny nodded toward the clock hanging between the two bathrooms on the far wall.

"You're going to stand here and bug me, aren't you," she sighed, finally looking him in the eyes again.

"Yes. Don't pretend like you weren't finished with whatever you were working on." He had her there. She'd been done for a good half hour before he wandered in, secretly scrolling through state and national park accounts on Instagram, daydreaming about trips she would take some day.

"So..." Danny crossed his arms across his chest.

"You're going to get me in trouble," Elise couldn't hide her smile, looking up at his handsome face. She caught herself thinking about kissing him again.

"Nah. Mary's cool. Aren't you, Mary?" he spoke his last sentence loud enough for her to hear.

Her office mate just gave him a thumbs up without looking away from her monitor. Elise covered her mouth to stifle a laugh.

"You're terrible."

"You have no idea," he gave her his best mischievous grin.

Elise did end up spilling the beans about her high school relationship with Jeremy on their date Saturday. They sat at a little round table in the locally-owned coffee house on the corner near where they had their first date. The fireplace made it feel even homier, a toasty reprieve from the harsh November cold outside.

"You really haven't dated anyone since then? That was 8 years ago, Elise," Danny said disbelievingly.

"Yes, thank you for the reminder," she stuck her tongue out at him. "I just never met anyone I found interesting enough to take the time and effort to date," she shrugged. "I haven't really clicked with anyone. And I don't see the point in dating someone if you go into it knowing or having an inkling that it won't work out. I'm a die hard romantic, I guess," she laughed softly.

Danny seemed to ponder this for a minute, nodding his head slowly, clearly lost in thought.

"But you find me interesting enough to put time and effort into? I clicked with you?"

"You're just fishing for compliments now," Elise laughed.

"No, no...Well, maybe," he chuckled. "Just feeling...lucky, I guess," he smiled.

"Don't ruin it by gloating," she teased. Danny smiled and threw his hands up in surrender.

She and Danny went out almost every weekend over the cold winter months. One week in December he finally invited her over to his place.

"I don't think that's a good idea," Elise felt a pit of despair growing in her stomach. She was scared to death she was going to drive him away by refusing his offer.

"Oh...ok. Too soon?"

"No, no, it's not that. Well, maybe. I don't know. I guess I'm afraid of how I would act," she wasn't sure what else to say.

"Because I'm sure you're such a rude house guest," he teased. She couldn't help but smile too.

"I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to...behave." Elise really didn't want to say what she was really thinking. It took Danny a few seconds to catch up.

"Oh," he drew out. She could practically see the lightbulb lighting up in his head.

"Oh," he said again. "Really?" he asked, both surprised and flattered.

"Really," she admitted, both of them blushing now.

"Well, I didn't mean to put you on the spot."

"It's ok. I just didn't want you to think I didn't want to. Or whatever," she looked away.

"You're cute when you're flustered," he whispered close to her ear.

"See? Right there," her head shot up as she pointed at him accusingly. "That is not helpful and you know it. That is exactly why I cannot come over yet."

"Yet," Danny replied, not missing a beat, pointing back at her.

"You heard me," she smiled in spite of herself.

"I can wait. I'm patient," he said with a shit-eating grin. "Whenever you do want to...come over...just let me know," he looked down at her, amused.

Elise rolled her eyes and smiled.

Danny had actually been a gentleman and hadn't asked her over any more, as promised. Elise was surprised one week in February when they hadn't made any plans for the weekend yet. It was already Friday. She had become comfortable enough with him by then to call him out on it.

"You seeing your other girlfriend this weekend?" she joked over lunch.

"What?" confusion spread on his face. "I have National Guard training this weekend. Didn't I tell you?"

"No," she said plainly.

"Oh. I thought I had. I'm sorry."

"Well, next weekend," Elise forced a smile. She hoped it was convincing. In actuality, she was kind of hurt that he had forgotten to tell her. She could understand if they had just started dating, but it had been nearly 4 months of going out every weekend.

"I really am sorry," he looked at her sincerely. Elise wasn't sure if he was just saying it because he meant it or just for her benefit. Maybe her face was giving her away.

She involuntarily backed her foot away when he tapped his against it under the lunch room table. She didn't look up from her food.

"Damn it, Elise, I said I'm sorry. I love you," he leaned forward and whispered angrily under his breath. This got her attention.

"What?" she was in shock, not sure if it was from the words or the fact that there were several of their co-workers nearby.

"You heard me," a hint of anger still tainted his voice. "I. Love. You," he spoke slowly, gentler.

Elise's eyes stung.

"You do?" she whispered.

"Of course," his features had softened now as well. "You know I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it," he paused. "I only regret blurting it out here," he gave her a sideways smile. "Sorry for not being more romantic about it. I can't win today."

"Please stop apologizing," Elise shook her head. "You do win. Everyday," she whispered, barely audible. "You win my respect. You win my heart. You win my laughter...You win my love," tears slid silently down her face. The fact that they were still in the lunchroom hung in the back of her mind. Danny looked like he was on the verge of tears himself.

"Let me see your hands."

"What?"

"Just do it. Please."

Elise slowly moved her hands from her lap to the tabletop. He took both of them into his own.

"Danny," she slightly hissed, looking nervously around the room.

"I don't care," he didn't look away from her. "Look at me. I love you. And I'm sorry I forgot to tell about my National Guard stuff this weekend. I'm an airhead."

"It's ok," she spoke quietly. "I'm sorry too. It just...hurt my feelings. I'm just having a 'girl' moment."

"Stop," he squeezed her hands before letting go. "I promise I'll make it up to you."