Danny and Elise Ch. 16 - The Finale

Elise woke in an unfamiliar room. The inside of her mouth was like sandpaper, the kind of dryness you only get when you've been sleeping with your mouth open for an extended time. The room was dim; it felt like night.

"Danny?" she called out meekly. Her head felt stuffy, groggy, like that of an induced sleep. She suddenly had a sense of Deja Vu, which added to her confusion.

A hospital bed, she finally noticed as she surveyed the room more. Panic welled up inside of her.

"Danny?!" Elise heard the urgency in her voice. Her brain slowly began putting the pieces together. He was gone. Shot down in China with most of the rest of his unit. Dead for almost a year. Where were her kids? How had she ended up in the hospital? She hadn't gone through with the attempt with the razor, had she?

"I'm here, baby," Elise heard his voice call softly from her right. A flood of emotions washed over her as she saw a shadow rise a few feet away from her bed, coming towards her.

"Danny?" she felt even more disoriented as his face came into view over hers. "How?" Elise trailed off, tears flooding her eyes like lava flowing from a volcano.

"It's ok. You're ok," he spoke softly, kissing her on the forehead tenderly.

"Oh God, Danny!" she grabbed him around the shoulders, pulling him to her. Elise buried her face in the crook of his neck, sobbing.

"Sshh," he soothed, stroking her hair. "You're alright. You're ok," emotion seemed to taint his own voice. She shook her head, still feeling muddled, but the curtain seemed to be slowly drawing back.

"You were dead," she managed, muffled into his neck. Elise refused to let him go, terrified she was just dreaming or imagining him again.

"No, ssshh. I'm right here. It was just a bad dream." Her mind reeled. Bad dream?

"Where am I? Why am I here?" she was trying desperately to make sense of everything.

"You, don't remember?" Danny spoke with trepidation. Elise shook her head again without moving.

"What's the last thing you remember?" he asked cautiously.

"I don't know, Danny," Elise turned her head to the side just enough that he could understand her. "I'm so confused. The last thing I remember is being in bed with you and Kate, but it wasn't really you. You were a ghost or a trick of my imagination. Something. I don't know. I had drunk too much and thought about slitting my wrists until the baby woke up," she started getting worked up again just thinking about it.

She heard him sniffle. He took a deep breath before continuing. She never thought she would be so indescribably happy to feel his chest rise and fall against her own.

"God, don't talk like that," Danny took her hand. "Sweetheart, you fell in the river today. You hit your head on a boulder. It knocked you out," she couldn't see his face, but his voice sounded strained.

"You almost drowned, Elise," he whispered. "I had to give you CPR." Danny's shoulders shook against her own now. The realization of everything brought her a new wave of tears.

"So we're...on our honeymoon?" she asked.

"Yes," he nodded his head slightly.

"I hit my hip when I fell in," Elise stated as if it had really happened. In her mind, it had.

"I couldn't kick right, but my backpack got stuck on a limb sticking out in the river. You came and saved me." Danny's body racked against hers harder, but she continued.

"I had to have a pin put in my hip. Gave me trouble for nearly a year. I got," Elise swallowed hard, the realization of everything she said being unreal finally started sinking in. "I got pregnant right after my hip healed," hot tears burned a trail down her cheeks. "We had a little boy." Silence fell over them, the only sounds their quiet crying.

"That sounds wonderful," Danny finally managed. "But it was just a dream," he started stroking her hair again.

"It was and it wasn't. I told you. You were dead, Danny," Elise could barely speak the words again.

"No. I'm here," he choked. "Wait a minute," he finally pulled himself away from her, reaching up to turn one of the lights on behind her bed.

Shadows still angled across his face, but it was the gray in his beard...or lack thereof. He was telling the truth...Not that he had any reason not to. The full force of the true reality set in like a ton of bricks.

"Oh, Danny," she held out her arms to him.

"It really is you, isn't it?" Elise whispered into his ear as he sat back down next to her, hugging her tight. He nodded in response.

"I thought I was going to lose you today, but it sounds like you had a rough time while you were asleep too," he looked her in the eyes. His own were as bloodshot as hers felt.

"You have no idea," Elise whispered. "It was so real, Danny." Suddenly, another memory from not so long ago popped into her head. Something she had tried hard to repress and had, until now.

"Do you remember when we first met? And I had those bad dreams about you?"

"Yah, why?" he held her at arm's length, waiting for her to continue.

"I made myself forget them. But they just came back to me. You're going to think I'm crazy, but you have to promise me something, Danny," her throat felt thick as a new wave of emotion began rising in her.

"What is it, sweetheart?" his brow furrowed.

"You have to get out of the Guard. Promise me, Danny."

"Elise, I know it seemed real, but it was just a..."

"Promise me!" she cut him off, voice ragged from crying so much. "Please," she begged, "Promise me you'll get out, or I can't be with you," the words pained her to say. She knew Danny probably thought she was crazy or over-reacting or both, but she meant it.

"I know I sound nuts, but I can't lose you again. I've already lost you three times before," Elise fought hard to regain her composure, trying to at least look sane.

"Ok, ok," Danny pulled her to him again. "I promise," he spoke muffled into the side of her head.

"I'd do anything for you. You know that, right?"

She did now. Elise couldn't help thinking back to the part of her "dream" when Danny had told her he was being deployed. How mad and hurt she felt that he wouldn't budge in leaving the National Guard, though she had begged him for months. How stubborn he had been. Her own grudge-holding tendencies and the resentment and abandonment she felt when he left the following week.

She acknowledged that it was not real, truly just a bad dream induced by a nasty head injury, but still. She couldn't help but feel like she was getting a second chance with him. That's why she had to make him stay this time and hoped Danny kept his promise. She would do anything not to lose him again, even if it had all been in her head.

It certainly felt real enough and didn't that matter? Elise felt like she was caught in some confused state, even though she knew the truth now. What if she was just in another dream? Paranoid ramblings of a girl with a head injury, she told herself. It reminded her of that Leonardo DiCaprio movie she loved, Inception. Maybe she had watched it a few too many times.

"Then will you lay with me?" she scooted over as far as she could, making a spot for him on the narrow hospital bed.

"Of course," Danny laid down on his side next to her, wrapping his arm around her. Elise felt an immense sense of comfort, safety, but still the tears started again.

"You know the nurse is probably going to come in soon once they look at your monitors and realize you're awake?" he asked with a slightly amused expression.

"I don't care," she tried to make her voice sound normal, but failed miserably.

"Hey, what's wrong now?" he stroked the hair out of her face.

"Just trying to wrap my head around everything still." She knew then, no matter how much she tried explaining it, Danny would never quite understand what the dream had felt like for her, but she tried anyway. "I know, I know, it wasn't real, but it still feels like I just lived the past ten plus years of my life and that I magically time-traveled back to now. And while I'm immensely happy to have you and know you're alive, I lost a lot too. I know how crazy this all sounds, I do."

Danny considered this for a minute as he continued stroking her hair as he always did when she was upset.

"The little boy?" he ventured.

Elise shook her head, looking away from him. They may be married now, but she still felt silly talking about kids.

It was ridiculous, really, that it still made her so uncomfortable, even now. It wasn't as if they hadn't talked about it before. That was kind of an important thing to know about one another going into a marriage.

"What is it then, baby?" his eyes held the same softness as his voice. "I'm trying to understand."

"I know you are," his kind words made the tears come faster. "It's not just...him. We had three kids, Danny. That kind of thing is hard to let go when you thought they were real." It made her heart ache just thinking about it.

"Oh, sweetheart," he hugged her tighter and let her emotions flow out of her for a bit longer before speaking again.

"I'll be happy to make a baby with you whenever you want," he whispered lovingly in her ear. A shiver coursed down her spine. Elise simply nodded her head against his chest, not looking up.

"Seriously. Whenever you want," he reached up and squeezed her shoulders quickly, trying to get her to look up.

"Ok," she spoke demurely, forcing a smile.

"I meant what I said earlier. I'd do anything for you, Elise. You're my wife now. Happy wife, happy life," he joked, trying to get her to lighten up. She couldn't help but giggle. It was one of the many things she loved about him. Danny could always make her laugh.

"I love you, Daniel Mortenson."

"And I love you, Mrs.Mortenson."

Later that evening, after all of the doctors and nurses had come and gone, Danny re-told the story of how she had ended up in the hospital, from her insisting. He sighed heavily when she asked.

"Do I have to?" a slight whine in his voice.

"Please?" she insisted. Elise wanted to get grounded back in reality as quickly as possible. Plus she hoped that it would jog her memory. She remembered most of the trail, but was her memory from the real world or the dream world she had fabricated?

"Alright, but I might get...upset."

"I know. It's ok," she rubbed his arm. "I'm not trying to torture you. I just want to remember what's real and what isn't." Danny nodded his head, accepting this.

"We were almost back to the car. There was only about half a mile or so. We came across that creek, remember?"

Elise stared at him blankly.

"I'm sorry," she shook her head. "I only remember the version I told you earlier."

"Right. Ok. Well, there wasn't any good way to get over it except that big log spanning over it. It sounds like some part of your brain at least remembers that accurately."

Elise nodded in agreement. Danny sighed again.

"You didn't want to go over it. You were scared. So I helped you across, then," he paused, clearly not wanting to think about it again, "you were almost there and you lost your balance." Danny closed his eyes momentarily. "You slipped from my hand so fast, Elise," he looked up at her. "The extra weight of the pack, I guess." He took a second before continuing, closing his eyes again, shaking his head.

"The way you screamed out my name, it was awful. I have never felt so helpless in my life. This probably sounds terrible, but I'm glad I couldn't hear your head hitting the boulder over the rushing of the water. I don't think I could have dealt with that, replaying that sound over and over in my head. It was bad enough seeing it."

"Danny, stop," she felt tears welling behind her eyes. He wasn't one to get upset easily and seeing him now was killing her.

"I'm sorry I asked. Please don't say any more," Elise pleaded.

"No," he shook his head. "It's alright," he insisted, trying to regain his composure.

"Maybe it'll be good for me. To tell you."

"I hate seeing you so upset, though."

Danny shrugged.

"It is what it is. I'm not made of steel, you know," he forced a sideways smile.

"I never expected you to be," Elise said plainly. "Just please, don't go on for my sake." Danny just nodded.

"The next part is kind of a blur. I remember running down to you, watching you get swept down the creek, but I don't remember how my backpack got off. You got caught on another big boulder about 30 yards from where you fell in at. The way you got caught was making the rapids flow over your face. Your face wasn't completely submerged, but the water was flowing over it enough..." he trailed off.

"I jumped in the water and pulled you out. You felt so heavy, with your pack still on and being water-logged. I made sure I got your face out of the water first. I had to kind of drag you out. You weren't breathing, so I had to pull you up further where it wasn't so rocky. I gave you CPR for a couple of minutes, I would guess, before you started breathing again. It felt like a lifetime."

Elise lost the battle to her tears as he continued.

"You coughed up a good amount of water when you came to. I ran back to my pack and got my extra jacket and emergency blanket. You were already shivering by the time I got back," he ran his hands over his face.

"I kept yelling for help, hoping someone would be nearby, being so close to the trailhead, while I got you covered up. I was about to get my phone out and call for help when a couple about my age showed up and called for me. I held you on my lap, trying to keep you warm until the rescue team got there. You kept going in and out of consciousness. It felt like it took forever to get you out of there. I really thought I was going to lose you there for a while, when you kept passing out," Danny came and sat next to her on the bed.

"Don't cry," he swiped a tear away from her cheek. "I'm just glad you're ok now."

Elise swallowed a lump in her throat.

"I'm sorry. I feel like a heel. I was so caught up in my own craziness, I didn't even think about what you had been through," she shook her head. "I'm so sorry," Elise whispered.

"No, I'm sorry I talked you into walking over that log," Danny's eyes glistened with tears.

"How about we call it even?" she smiled tiredly.

"Elise. Elise! Wake up!" she felt hands shaking her shoulders firmly. Someone was screaming.

"Elise. You're having a bad dream again."

The screaming finally stopped and she realized it was coming from her. Her cheeks were wet with tears, but no new ones fell. She was used to the drill by now.

"Sorry," she grumbled, rolling on her side away from him. Elise was as sick of the nightmares as Danny probably was.

"Come back here," he said playfully, sidling up against her back and wrapping an arm as far around her as he could. It wasn't very far these days. She was due with their son in less than 2 weeks.

The nightmares had returned a couple of months after she got pregnant. Instead of getting better, they had increased in frequency the further along she got. Elise finally had enough and started seeing a therapist about them, but it hadn't done a damn bit of good. It was nice to be able to talk about them with someone, but that was about it. It didn't make her feel any less crazy. Waking up once, sometimes twice a week, in a pool of her own sweat and screaming Danny awake didn't make them any less irritating.

She hardly ever told Danny about the dreams, though. He would ask occasionally, but she never offered many details. He knew they were mostly about him, or their non-existent children, or both dying. That was all he needed to know as far as she was concerned.

Elise placed a hand on top of his, resting on her bulging belly.

"It's ok," Danny spoke into her hair, sleep filling his voice.

"No, it's not," she replied grouchily. She was angry and tired, not a good combination. So, so very tired. The baby wasn't even here yet and she was already exhausted.

"I'm so tired," she cried softly, feeling defeated.

"I know you are," he rubbed her stomach. "It'll get better. We'll figure something out."

It did get better, finally, after she gave birth to Parker. For whatever reason, the nightmares that plagued her for months disappeared as quickly as they re-appeared, if not more so, after their son was born. Elise was scared to death they would start again when she got pregnant with their second son and daughter, but they never did.

Many things were different in Elise and Danny's lives from the awful, lucid dream she had during their honeymoon fiasco. One good thing that had come out of that whole trip had been their love for Canada. In fact, they had taken several more backcountry trips there before finally deciding to just move there. Elise had always dreamed of moving away from the Midwest and Danny didn't seem to care where they ended up so long as they were together.

Alberta suited their lifestyle to a tee. The eastern edge of the Canadian Rockies was the perfect playground to them with its great natural areas and parks, extensive trail system, and beautiful alpine lakes. They felt like they were truly at home.

The area lent itself to allowing Danny to follow his dreams too. (With a little help from the money Elise was making from her surprisingly lucrative job as a travel writer too.) From May through September, he lead other, somewhat more wary, outdoor enthusiasts on kayaking and backcountry camping adventures in the area. Not that he was in it solely for the money, but he found he was able to charge way more for these trips than he ever dreamed.

They lived comfortably, though they weren't considered rich by most people's standards.

Best of all was that each of them could bring the entire family along for work. That was one strange thing from Elise's concussion nightmare that actually did come true. They had ended up having two boys and a girl, in that order. Danny convinced her to have their daughter a lot sooner in real life, which she was thankful for. It had been hard in her dream having a 7 and 9 year-old and starting all over with a baby again. Three kids were hard, period, but 6, 4, and 1 1/2 seemed much more tolerable, in a way.

It was a pleasant early June day. The temperature hovered in the lower 70's throughout the afternoon: Perfect hiking weather. Danny was out at one of her favorite spots in the Kananaskis Country Wilderness for work. It was only a 12-minute drive from their house. She couldn't resist. Elise packed the kids and their gear in the SUV and headed out.

"We're coming to stalk you. :) Where you at?" she texted.

They had found a surprisingly reliable cell phone provider up there. They could sometimes be 13-miles in on a trail out in the middle of nowhere and still get a signal.

"Getting ready to set up camp at Bear Lake. Got a couple of gawkers. Lol"

"Daniel Stephen Mortenson! How many times have I told you not to call them that?!" she texted back.

"Gawkers" was Danny's term for the clients he got who ended up only hiking for half of the distance they had planned because they got so sidetracked by the beauty of the wilderness. This was all fine and dandy except for the areas where you had to obtain permits ahead of time for campsites. Kananaskis was one such area.

"Lol Sorry. But they've only done like 5 miles of the 8 they wanted to do. At this rate it's going to get dark as we're still setting up camp."

"It'll be ok. We'll meet you out there. I'll help...Better yet, I'll swap your pack for the baby and run ahead. :P She's been a grouchy today."

"Lol I love you. See you when you get here."

Elise found Danny with a middle-aged couple, probably in their late 40's, early 50's, his clients for the weekend, when she and the kids arrived at the camp. Maybe it was just her, but it was so hard to tell people's ages nowadays. The couple looked to be in top physical condition, but the graying hair and crow's feet around their eyes were telling.