by JRob
This story is garbage. No suspense, no plot, no creativity, no imagination. No editing. This was a fuckin' nightmare to read.
I will, however, make note of this "author's" name just for the sake of bypassing any further posts by this author. This was a hodge podge of errors & a waste of time.
cant wait to find out if he gets to fuck the mother. gotta write more.
I enjoyed the two characters and it was a nice touch how they ended up in the park!
Thanks for the series. I have often thought of my friend Trevor's mom, and this story got me thinking about her as your lead character. I laughed at some of your sly comments, about how the situation developed, and hot erotica many of the scenes were. I once stumbled across a couple doing it in the park. They were down a path like you mentioned, and I was going down to the river to fish. Was paying little attention to anything until I heard something ahead, and when I turned the corner there was a girl giving a blow job to an older guy. I didn't know what to do so I watched for a couple seconds until the guy noticed me. I turned and walked away but it was so hot seeing them. I pictured myself stumbling upon you and Dan's mom in the park!
Here's why. I missed reading Chapter 1 so I read it before proceeding to Chapter 2. There were times when you had me laughing. The character, Dan... how can I put it... is so unabashedly precocious that it's precious. It's like he's cool and yet excited all at the same time. Keep going.