All Comments on 'Daughter Joins In, Brings a Friend'

very interesting look forward to see what else happens this summer and what other friends she may bring along and what suz thinks about all this

You need to proofread more carefully. You switched the mother's and daughter's names several times, which sometimes made the story hard to follow, especially if the switch was in dialogue. Content wise, the story was very enjoyable. Keep going to part 2.

That was a totally hot story! I can't wait until Mom gets in the mix.

Attorneyman

...then I'm not either.

I stopped reading when it became clear that you had not bothered to proofread. Switching character names back and forth repeatedly ruined what may have been a decent story.

You need to pay attention to your who's who. When the story starts, Mom is Suz. When Daughter arrives, she's Tris. But then Mom becomes Tris. Very confusing.

I stopped reading halfway through the first page to ask if YOU know who is the mom and who is the daghter cuz I don't. For Pete's sake, go back and fix your characters names once and for all!!

got a little mixed up, clling Suz by her daughter's name. The title is a bit confusing too, Daughter joins in; this emplys she joins in with him and her mother whereas she and a friend have fun with Sean.

I was hoping it would’ve evolved into a 3-some with the mother and daughter at some point.