Dead and Horny Ch. 05

"No, couldn't. This guy is lame, just beats his meat too often while fantasizing about someone else who works here. Coincidentally, that's how I got this little nugget of info from him. Wait for it..." She held up a hand and then pointed at the man's crotch. "Ha, there it is! Anyway, they minimize electronics down here. Haunted items can drain electricity to gain in power, which is fairly common knowledge, and they don't want some of the resident spirits wreaking havoc. Any electrical lines that go out there cause the systems in here to short out all the time, so they disconnected everything. Those glowing panels are some imported enchanted marble slabs from Jordan. No, the real reason for no cameras is kind of exciting. Apparently, that thing that lives at the bottom of the pit sometimes summons things."

"Wait, what? I thought you said it wasn't awake?"

"Awake is a relative term for something smeared across time and space." Lily pointed to a series of glowing bars off to the side of the monitor. "Think of it more like a dream. Occasionally, whatever this thing is thinking of bleeds over into the real world sometimes, and when it does, it roams the hallways for a while before disappearing. These bars over here will start to flicker if it's been detected. They're hooked up to some electromagnetic sensors along the corridor."

"Don't understand why they have bars but no monitors."

"Because apparently seeing or hearing it will drive you insane, even through a monitor." Lily had a wild look on her face. "And that sounds so fucking cool! I am insanely curious now what it looks like, aren't you?"

Dana had zero desire to mess with such a creature. Ever since dying and discovering that magical creatures existed, her life (and death) had been literally turned upside down. The last thing she needed was some kind of elder god nonsense that led to an eternity of insanity. "Can we just get our stuff and go?"

"Spoilsport." Lily stuck the card in a door on the other side of the room and knelt down. A scanner opened up and she pressed her face to it. It beeped twice and the door unlocked.

"Retina scan?" Dana asked.

"Yep. Could just rip an eye out of his head, but apparently we're in a hurry, so just a little shapeshifter magic." She walked through the door and then down the hall. There was a series of rooms followed by a long hallway, but she went to the third door on the left and swiped the card through.

"Where does that go?" Dana asked, pointing at the hallway.

"Dorms. There's about twenty people who live here year-round. They maintain the place and do research." Lily pushed the door open. "And voila!"

On the other side of the door was a laboratory. Clearly labeled boxes had been spread around the room, but each one had the same label at the bottom.

Collected from Unearthly Delights

"These are all magic items?" Dana wondered out loud.

"Nope. They don't have time to test this shit on site, so they just bring it all here." Lily picked up a nearby box and looked at the label. She set it down and repeated the process with the next one. "I am very grateful that they are organized. Why don't you put on one of those lab coats? That way, if someone comes in, they won't question it. And if they do, just act like you're supposed to be here, okay?"

"Yeah, okay." Dana put on one of the lab coats hanging by the door. She wasn't certain why someone would care about wearing such a thing while examining potential magic objects, but Lily's logic was sound. She opened a nearby box and checked inside to verify that the contents matched the label. Lily was right, the Order was thorough. As she set the box down, she felt the floor rumble beneath her feet. "What was that?"

"What was what?" Lily had pulled a bong out of one of the boxes and pretended to smoke a bowl now that she had Dana's attention. When she opened her mouth, a hazy cloud of smoke emerged, and her eyes were all bloodshot.

"Seriously?"

"Demons love to blaze it," Lily replied, then stuck out her tongue when smoke came out her ears.

"If I was alive, I would hate you so much right now."

Dana continued her search, but moved slowly, pausing every now and then to see if she could feel the rumbling once more. Were they far enough down that it was just some kind of small tectonic movement? Or maybe the thing below the pit decided to stretch? She found a thick file full of paperwork and flipped through it and was surprised to see a sketch of the pearl necklace Ratu had drawn for her inside. She pulled it out and flipped the paper over. The word Dragon Seed had been scrawled on the back, followed by a question mark. Interesting. When she put it back, she found some additional paperwork on it, and read through it quickly. Apparently, the Order didn't have the necklace either, but were very concerned about it being out in the wild. "And you're sure that the marbles are here?"

"Nope. Just a vague memory of Cyrus seeing them as they were collected. Guy out front isn't part of the chain of custody, so if they aren't here, then we will have to look somewhere else. I really hope they haven't been catalogued and stored in one of the big rooms, because those could take us days to search."

"Really? Days?"

"Yes, days. Do you think they just leave stuff sitting out on the shelves? Wards everywhere, some objects are sealed in concrete so people can't just grab them and bail. I think that Plymouth may have been sealed in concrete. Seems a bit extreme to me, but whatever."

"I thought you said this is where they tried to store the non-scary stuff."

"Scary is a relative term. This place is built under a poisonous lake next to a being of immense power who may someday wake up and decide to eat half of Montana. The Order relies on people never knowing this place exists, and if they do, never letting them know what may be stored here. By themselves, most of these objects are never going to just wander off and kill a bunch of people, and a good chunk of them are..." Lily trailed off and cocked her head. "Okay, that time I felt it."

"What would make the ground rumble?" Dana knelt down and put her ear to the floor. There was a steady hum punctuated with loud clicks. She immediately regretted not doing this earlier.

"Oh shit, the cube!" Lily grabbed the boxes closer to her and dug through them. "The cube is going up to let someone in!"

"Shouldn't we be going then?"

"We've got half an hour for the cube to go up, and half an hour for it to come back. I'm more worried about sneaking past whoever is coming down once we—aha!" Lily ripped the lid off of a box and stuck her hand inside. When she pulled it out, she held a small cloth sack. "I did it! I found your fucking marbles!"

"C'mon, let's go!" Dana was already moving into the hall and Lily was close behind. They only made it a few feet when one of the other doors swung open behind them.

Lily pushed Dana against the nearest door, then swiped the key card through the reader and followed her inside when the door opened. The room was dark, but the lights came on automatically once they were inside. Unlike the previous lab, it was almost completely empty with a series of diagnostic devices set up around the perimeter of the room.

It was what was in the middle of the room that caught Dana's attention.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck..." Lily whispered, her ear to the door. She sat there for another minute, then looked over at Dana. "I don't think they saw us. We should be good to go."

"Lily? What am I looking at?"

In the center of the room was a motorcycle that had been twisted like a pretzel. Parts of it had been dismantled and were strewn around the room with bits of rock and rust twisted up in the metal, and it could have been any other motorcycle in the world if not for the fact that she had spent an entire year restoring it.

"Huh?" The succubus looked at the bike. "You're looking at a hot mess is what you're looking at. C'mon, let's go!"

Dana stepped toward the wreck, her hands on her chest. There was no mistaking it, this was Alex's bike. She knelt down and touched the cold metal with her fingers, the chrome riddled with scratches. "This is my bike, Lily. How is it down here?"

"It can't be your bike. We parked the bike on the way here, remember? It's not like they grabbed it and beat us down here, don't be ridicul—" the door opened and a man and a woman wearing glasses walked in. The man held a clipboard and the woman had a cup of coffee, and everybody froze when they saw each other.

Dana gave a casual wave. After all, she was supposed to be here. "Evening."

"Oh, didn't expect to see anybody," the man said, then switched the clipboard to his left hand. "Brother Bastien." He extended his right hand for Lily to shake it.

"Tell me about this bike," Lily said in her haughtiest tone while shaking his hand. The woman looked at Bastien, who just shrugged.

"We're not sure. Turned up about a week ago, down by the observation platform. Nobody knows how it got there, and—" he dropped his clipboard when Lily's tail struck the woman, and almost had his free hand in his own pocket before she got him next. Both of them slumped to the floor, unmoving.

"A week?" Dana asked. "How has it been here for a week?"

"How the fuck should I know?" Lily read Bastien's dreams for a couple of minutes. "Shit. These two were part of a team of five, but they're here early on account of a pre-research booty call. We need to go, right now."

Dana beat Lily to the door and they ran into the front lobby together. On the monitors, she could see a small cluster of cars parked near the edge of the pit, and there was a phone at the desk that rang incessantly.

"Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me...hello?" Lily's voice was now that of the desk guard. "Yes, Master Cyrus. Was helping move something heavy...yes, I will put everyone on full alert, see you shortly." She hung up the phone and looked at Dana with dread in her eyes.

"Bad news?" Dana asked.

"Apparently we were followed." Lily turned to look at the monitors. Though there were plenty of cars, nobody was by them, which meant their occupants were likely on their way. "And even better, Cyrus was calling me from a phone by the loading dock and is headed this way right now in the cube."

"I thought we had almost an hour?"

"We did." Lily was now looking through the drawers. "But what I thought was the cube going up was the cube going back. They were right behind us on the way in."

"So, what are we going to do?"

She looked at Dana and then over at the console. Lily tapped her hands on the desk, then looked at the guard on the floor. A grin broke across her face.

"Fuck me, I've got an idea so crazy it might work."

Cyrus sat on the hood of his car, his wand pointed at the motorcycle they had found parked along one of the side roads on the way in. Tasia and a few other Knights stood nearby it, their swords drawn just in case. The motorcycle was chained to a plate in the floor of the cube, and the cube was busy moving down the long hallway on ethereal gears. Ordinarily, they would have left the town car behind, but he now suspected that the succubus had gotten in somehow, so had stashed extra magical items in the car in preparation for whatever awaited them.

He touched the breast of his shirt, feeling the cold, hard metal of the amulet he wore beneath it. It had been an overnight gift from the Council, and if he was going to end up in another one-on-one with the succubus, at least he was now far better prepared.

Amida sat next to Cyrus, his legs crossed and his eyes closed. In his hands, the necklace that Cyrus had given him was floating horizontally, as if being tugged forward.

"She's down here," Cyrus said, his suspicions confirmed.

After Fort Collins, they had been able to track the succubus north, but then she had vanished, only to reappear somewhere on the East Coast. They had lost several hours heading east, and were on their way to the airport when she headed back into Montana on what Cyrus had assumed was a plane. Clearly full of some tricks, the last thing he had expected was for her to come here.

"Do you think she came for the Dragon Seed?" Amida asked. He opened his eyes and the necklace became inert once more.

"If she did, she will be sorely disappointed." As of now, it was only presumed that the Dragon's Seed had been briefly available at Unearthly Delights. If it had been found, he would have taken it straight to the Council. An object that powerful could never be allowed to fall into human hands, and he was fairly certain that it already had.

However, if the two had been tracking the seed, everything now made sense. While the succubus would have no use for it, the witch who owned her could do quite a bit.

"Coming up on the dorms," Tasia announced.

The cube was a large transport device capable of carrying tremendous loads, and a member of the Order controlled it with a series of levers up front.

"Any movement?" Cyrus asked, referring to the bike. He was fairly certain that the blonde had cast an enchantment on it, but wasn't taking any chances.

Tasia shook her head.

The door for the dorms became visible around the curve of the tunnel, and he could see a couple of women waiting for them. One looked vaguely familiar with dark hair and her sword unfolded, and the other wore a lab coat and dark glasses. Likely he had interrupted any research that was going on down here.

The Knight waved and then stepped inside the door, leaving the researcher outside. The cube slowed its approach as the man at the controls pulled the levers into neutral, eventually coming to a stop.

The researcher stepped forth to greet them. Her hair was swept back into a tight bun and she held a clipboard.

"Master Cyrus," she said, then looked across the party. Her eyes stopped on the motorcycle and she froze in place. Eventually she looked at him with piercing blue eyes. "I hear we have an intruder?"

"We do." He slid off the hood of the car. "I'm sure that you were working on something important, but we need all hands on deck. We went ahead and notified our people in Butte to keep an eye out, but we were able to track her here."

"What are we dealing with?" she asked. "And what's with the bike?"

"Belongs to a witch," Tasia said. "That's part of how we know they're down here."

"Oh." The researcher tucked her clipboard away under one arm. "So, you think they've come down here because of the bike?"

The door opened up and the Knight came back out, followed by a man in a dark sweater who looked like he had just woken up.

"Sorry about the delay, Master Cyrus," the woman began. "The dorm is moving a little slow. We've been researching some crazy stuff which means long hours."

Cyrus nodded in understanding. He had been part of similar operations before and knew it was easy to lose track of time. "Here, let's head inside and I'll brief you."

Tasia and Amida went ahead of him, and the Knight hesitated before sheathing her sword and pushing the man who had just come out back in. They all gathered together in the lobby with the researcher bringing up the rear. Tasia immediately went to the monitors to look them over.

"Did anybody come through here recently?" Cyrus asked. "Anybody who went out to check a storage room or one of the patrols?"

"No, sir," said the man who had taken his position behind the counter. "It's been a really long week and tonight was the first chance for most of us to catch up on our sleep."

"Oh? Long how?" Cyrus looked past the man toward the door to the dorms. He was surprised that more people hadn't shown up yet.

"We had a potential break-in a week ago," the man explained. "There was evidence we had been infiltrated, but none of the storage areas were breached and all personnel have been accounted for. We even had someone come up from town to conduct an internal affairs review, just in case. Between looking into the break-in and dealing with that, we've also had a spike in appearances of the Horror, which means we've had to go on a full lockdown several times."

"The horror?" Amida asked.

The researcher who had let them in tilted her head at this.

Something was off down here, but Cyrus turned his attention to the man at the desk.

"It's what we call...well, It." He pointed at the bands of light near the monitors. "They've been going off like crazy ever since the break-in. We even found a busted-up motorcycle down by the research platform."

"A motorcycle?" Tasia asked. Cyrus, too, was immediately wary. He looked toward the door and thought of the bike currently chained down. It couldn't be a mere coincidence, could it? Alarm bells now rang in his head, but he couldn't figure out which direction they should be running as a result.

"Yeah, I can show you if you want." He patted his pockets, his face reflecting a sense of panic.

"Oh, here," the Knight said, then knelt down by the desk to pick up a card from beneath it. "You must have dropped it."

Tasia let out a disgusted grunt and allowed the man to open the door for her, then followed him inside.

"The motorcycle that was found looks like it went through a tornado," the researcher said, causing the Knight to nod. "So, you were saying that you could track the succubus?"

"Yes. In fact, here." He turned to Amida. "Please."

Amida winced and held out the necklace. He heard the Knight let out a gasp and she touched her throat.

"Problem, sister?" Amida asked.

"Just startled is all. I had one just like it, once." She waved her hand dismissively. "Just a piece of costume jewelry I needed for something undercover."

Brother Amida shrugged and closed his eyes. The necklace shuddered and started to swing from side to side like a pendulum. Every time it swung, it crept a little bit higher, and it appeared to be pointing to the dormitory that was built slightly above the research pod.

"It looks like she may already be inside," Cyrus said, then pulled his wand from his pocket. Was that why nobody else had come down? If so, they could already be dead.

Shit.

"Here, let's head in and check it out," said the Knight as she pushed the door open and stepped aside. Amida's face was a mask of concentration, and the unsteady necklace went rigid.

It was pointing directly at the Knight.

Cyrus realized what had been nagging at him since he got here. The duplicity was so simple, he hated himself for falling for it. He raised his wand, summoning the magic within it to blast her back to hell when he remembered that the succubus hadn't been alone when she came out to greet them.

"The witch—" he shrieked, but the researcher, who must be the witch in disguise, was already pushing his arm away as the magic blasted free of the wand. A ball of holy light tore down the hallway, scorching the walls and floor until it splashed against the distant doorway. Amida's eyes were now open, and he stuck his free hand in his pocket, but the succubus was faster.

Her stinger appeared and struck like a snake, hitting Amida in the chest hard enough that he led out a grunt before falling forward into her arms.

"Chucklebunny, mother fucker," she sneered and then threw the mage into Cyrus. The two of them fell to the ground, and Cyrus heard a door down the hallway open up. The witch crouched down over Cyrus and covered his mouth with her hand to keep him from talking.

"Amida!" Tasia cried from the hallway. Cyrus couldn't see her.

"The succubus in the dorms!" The succubus shouted using Amida's voice from around the door. "Master Cyrus is down!"

NO! He needed to free his mouth to call to Tasia, so he tried to bite the witch. Her eyes widened and she grabbed his chin with her other hand, twisting his jaw about to force his mouth closed again. She was surprisingly strong.