Dead and Horny Ch. 09

Hi all! Annabelle here, and I'm back with some island magic!

New reader? You're gonna be confused. This is a spinoff of HFHM that takes place during Book Three, so there's kind of a lot going on.

Returning reader? Welcome back! To recap, Dana and Lily have arrived in Hawaii, ready to track down the Dragon Seed, which is in the hands of the mysterious Tristan Edge.

I hope you have fun with this next chapter and that it can bring you a little joy this month. Thanks for all the kind words and ratings, it's definitely helped keep me going this winter. Future release dates are in my bio, so go check it out and plan accordingly ☺️

Without further ado, welcome to

The Party

Cyrus closed his eyes and breathed in deeply through his nose, allowing the natural humidity of the island to flood through his sinuses. Memories of trips to Greece, South Africa, and even parts of the Philippines while hunting a rogue naga flitted behind his eyes, but he tuned them out. There was something about the scent of salt in the air that relaxed him, made him feel at ease. Maybe someday, if he lived long enough, he would retire off the coast and take up fishing. Or maybe even stand up paddleboarding. Whatever it was he decided on, it would be infinitely easier than tracking down and hunting cryptids.

He had stopped at the bottom of the boarding stairs, his hand on the rail. Behind him, he heard Amida clear his throat.

"I don't mean to rush you, Master Cyrus, but this box is getting heavy."

"My apologies." Cyrus moved to the side and watched Amida step off the stairs carrying a wooden crate. They had taken a private plane from Montana in the early hours, which also meant that they had brought some additional cargo that was due to arrive anyway. Inside the crate were replacement parts for a device meant to block sonar, which allowed the local mermaid colony to avoid detection by the navy.

Amida handed the crate over to a member of the Order wearing an aloha shirt and strings of wooden beads around his neck.

"I have a change of clothes for you," said the local, then set the crate in the passenger seat of an unmarked van parked on the tarmac. He opened the rear door and pulled out some plastic tubs. "You will fit in better in these, and it won't be so hot."

Tasia took her box and opened it, then let out a snort. "I can't remember the last time I wore so little," she declared.

"Then maybe you need to take more vacations," Cyrus told her, then picked up the tub with his name on it.

They had already tracked down Tristan Edge through the use of their psychic, and were planning to infiltrate a party he was throwing tonight at an estate he had rented for a porn shoot. It bothered him a bit that they were going in blind, but this was hardly the most dangerous mission he had been on.

That, and despite their difficulties with the succubus, Amida and Tasia were the best of their generation. They wouldn't be doing it alone either, and he waited for the rest of his team to receive their gear. Local support would be ready for them if they needed it, but the Hawaiian team's specialty was largely rooted in keeping the locals from harassing the cryptids who lived in the area.

He had a strong feeling that he would need the fighters he had brought. Tasia had stripped her clothes off already next to Amida, who was now also naked. Both of them put on clothes that made them look like tourists, though Tasia still carried a regal air about her. She was in a one-piece suit with cloth shorts, and she strapped her collapsed sword to her leg. The blade shimmered and disappeared under the simple glamour, and Amida slid his ten-inch wand into the pocket of his trunks, which were only a few inches deep at most.

They may look like beach bums in the making now, but the magical gear was top notch.

"Master, are you going to change?" asked someone behind him.

Cyrus smirked and stripped off his clothes. When his shirt came off, he heard everyone else go silent for a moment, most likely at the scars along his back. He pushed back the memory of a biting spider swarm and slid into a pair of cargo shorts with comfortable sandals beneath. He put on an aloha shirt of his own, then went through the pockets of his jacket to get everything he needed.

It was with a small amount of sadness that he watched them pack away his jacket. He couldn't remember the last time he had been without it, and it felt like it was somehow the last time he would ever see it.

"Hmmph." He snorted away the thought, then looked at the others. "Are we ready?"

Tasia undid her ponytail so that her hair tumbled free around her shoulders. She ran her fingers through it and then pulled a pair of sunglasses from the small beach bag she was carrying and slipped them over her face.

"Let's go carve ourselves a dragon," she stated, then moved toward a group of SUVs that had been parked behind the van. She got into the driver's seat and rolled down the window, and Amida got in the passenger seat. Cyrus joined a pair of young women in the back, and opened up his laptop.

"Class is officially back in session," he announced, certain that this hunt would go far better than the last. The succubus had caught everybody off guard, and had reminded him that he needed to be thinking ahead. He stuck his hand in his pocket and gripped the metal cross tucked within.

And if that succubus showed up again, he would be ready for her.

The beach was crowded with people that smelled to Dana like hundreds of sizzling burgers on a grill. Even the scent of sunscreen failed to overpower the odor of ballpark franks that wafted off of a pair of coeds who were busy sunning their backs with their bikini tops undone.

"There's so much exposed flesh out here," remarked Lily. "I can't tell you how much arousal I can sense, it's like ambrosia."

"Aren't you hot in those boots?" asked Dana. Lily was in a barely-there bikini, but still wore her thick leather boots. Other beach goers were reflected in the shiny black leather of her boots, and more than a few people stared at her. "Why not take them off, get some sand between your toes?"

"Maybe I like standing out." She cocked her hip toward an older man with curly white hairs on his chest and a large belly. He was staring at her while eating a massive ice cream cone. She pulled up on one of her straps, causing the back of her bikini to disappear between her buttcheeks, then bent forward a little.

The man dropped his cone onto the hot sand and swore to himself before picking it up and taking it to the trash.

"You're gonna give someone a heart attack," Dana told her.

"If a little cheek is enough to kill a man, then that's not my problem. Besides, he shouldn't have been eating that anyway. I could sense his arteries clogging shut." Lily stopped and gazed out along the distant beach, then pointed. "We're headed there, by the way."

The succubus was pointing to a large cliff made of lava rock with several large homes built into the side of it. From where they stood, Dana could see the high-walled barrier that kept the homes segregated from the island.

"Tristan's production company is doing their shoot up there," Lily said. "If we can get in, we can look around a bit, figure out what we're dealing with."

"How do we get in?"

She shrugged. "We'll play it by ear. Besides, we've got back-up if we need it."

Dana nodded and pulled the straps of Tick Tock tight. The mimic was posing as a large, folded beach chair, and the strap squeezed her shoulder reassuringly. They continued down the paved path that bordered the white sand beach, and Dana watched the families as they walked past.

A small family was busy setting up a volleyball net, and she couldn't help but wonder. If Alex had lived, would they have eventually started a family? It was something they hadn't really discussed, but she knew that Alex had wanted children someday. How would that have worked? Would they have adopted, or maybe done artificial insemination? Which one of them would have been pregnant?

The sidewalk ended, and she followed Lily out onto the sand. The beach continued for a long way before turning into large, scary rocks. The distant shore was, in fact, not reachable by the beach, and she found herself staring across a large patch of water that was bordered by a rocky dam.

"Guess we're swimming," Lily said, then started walking into the water. "I didn't look too hard at the map, so that's on me."

"Why not just walk?" Dana asked.

"Gated community, apparently. So even if we walk, we'd still need to get in, and if we wait, we'll miss the shoot."

"I can't swim there like this," Dana said. It wasn't a fear of the water, but the fact that the surf looked rough and it would be difficult to make the swim while towing the mimic.

Lily vanished beneath the waves and resurfaced to float on her back. She now wore a wetsuit with swim fins and a snorkel. "It's not that hard to fit in, surfer girl." She pointed over her shoulder to a group of surfers who were waiting for waves. "Toss the mimic in and catch a wave."

Realizing what Lily wanted, Dana took off her sandals and strolled into the water. Nobody seemed to be looking their way, so she submerged Tick Tock and felt the canvass straps of the chair stiffen abruptly beneath her fingertips. A surfboard emerged from the water with a laughing skull in the middle, and she laid down on it and paddled her way out.

Lily came back to tow them out past the breaking waves, where the water was smoother. Dana paddled relentlessly toward the opposite shore. It was easily a couple of miles, and on more than one occasion, a sudden wave threatened to dump her over.

Though she was a decent swimmer, navigating the surf was proving more difficult. She would sometimes watch one of the now distant surfers catch a wave and ride it in, and wished she could accomplish a similar feat. Maybe Tick Tock had a way to help?

"Don't suppose you have a way to get us there faster, do you?" she asked the surfboard.

Tick Tock didn't respond, and she sighed. Lily surfaced about ten feet away, holding a starfish.

"You're not supposed to be touching the wildlife," Dana informed her. "And why do you even have that?"

"I think they're pretty. They remind me of..." Lily looked at the starfish, then scowled and dropped it in the water. "Guess I'm towing your ass. Do me a favor and hold on."

The tip of Lily's tail slithered over the edge of the surfboard, and Dana grabbed it with both hands. The succubus submerged and kicked, pulling Dana across the bay at a much faster speed. Beneath the waves, Lily was using her wings to propel them forward, and after just over an hour, the jagged rocks of the shore rose up on them like the teeth of a shark.

They came to a stop, and Lily surfaced, a frown on her face.

"They looked a lot smaller from far away," she said, then looked along the rocks. "Guess we're climbing wet rocks. What do you think?"

"I'm thinking that I wish I wore something other than flip-flops and a sarong." She studied the rocks, then pointed up at a section of fence. The gnarled rocks had plenty of handholds, and there was a flat spot that was easily scaled. "I think we could climb up there. You carry the surfboard."

"Tow me, blow me, carry my shit. A working girl's job is never done." Lily grabbed onto the surfboard and held it steady. "Much easier to carry a beach chair."

"Yeah, hold on." Dana grabbed her sandals and rolled into the water. For a moment, the surf gobbled her up, and then she surfaced. She swam around Lily and grabbed onto one of the rocks, doing her best to steady herself. As the surf swelled, she hauled herself out of the water.

Halfway up the cliffs, she looked down to see Lily carrying the beach chair about ten feet down. The rocks weren't hard to scale at all. When she made it to the top, she discovered that the railing was only to cover a gap in the rocks in someone's backyard. The yard itself was empty, but there was a pool with a green floating mattress bouncing along the interior edge. The home was three stories tall with large bay windows that overlooked the ocean.

Dana hopped over the railing and moved away so that Lily could follow. They moved together along the side of the fence until they reached the gate that let them out front. Dana opened it quietly, and then both of them were moving toward the street.

"Welcome to Pele's Point," Lily told her, then led her to the sidewalk. "One of the most exclusive neighborhoods in all of Hawaii, built up on a massive lava flow from hundreds of years ago. Comes with breathtaking ocean views and twenty-four-hour neighborhood security."

"Why the security, though?" She looked at the surrounding homes. It was clear that they were easily worth millions of dollars. "I thought Hawaii was supposed to be laid back."

Lily shook her head. "Laid back doesn't mean no problems. Theft is a pretty big problem on the islands, and you'd better believe the people who live here have some great shit to steal. I would also put money on the fact that these homes aren't occupied year-round. It's one of the reasons they're doing a porn shoot out here. Why not make extra cash on your million-dollar vacation home which you probably only visit every year or so?"

Dana frowned. She imagined if she had the money to buy a home like these, she would want to live in it year-round. Then again, whatever job allowed her to live such a way probably wouldn't be one she could do from home.

"Any ideas where our guy is?" she asked.

"Yes. The shoot is at a place called the Black Palace, which is at the top of the hill."

"Sounds ominous."

They were walking along a wide street with no lines painted on it. The few people Dana saw out and about looked to be groundskeepers, and she saw no fewer than ten people tending gardens or yards. The sidewalk they walked along had giant concrete baskets along it with large flowers she had never seen before, and a Hawaiian woman with a wide brimmed hat was busy snipping dead buds out.

"It's not meant to be. Guy who had it built has that last name is all."

"But what about the palace part?"

Lily stopped in the road, her eyes set on a gap between the buildings up ahead. "See for yourself."

Through the gap, Dana saw an enormous home with large pillars in the front, and what looked like a tower in the back. It reminded her slightly of Mike's home, but on a much larger scale, and the third story had a large patio that hung directly over the cliffs with a view of the ocean on all three sides. "How the hell do you afford something like that out here?" she asked incredulously.

"Apparently the guy is a billionaire. Billionaires do what they want. They're kind of like the modern world's equivalent of a wizard, in a way. So much money, they don't know what to do with it."

"Must be nice," Dana muttered.

"Oh, it is." Lily started walking again, and when she passed behind a palm tree, her appearance rippled. Her hair was now a dirty blonde, and her wetsuit had become a bathing suit once more. She was about twenty years older now, and stopped to hand Dana the beach chair.

"One of us needs to look the part," she explained, tilting her sunglasses down to make eye contact. The sunglasses were encrusted with gems, and a cursive letter C was on the corner of the frames. "You can be my poor niece, just out for a quick visit before going back to school in the states."

"School has already started, though," Dana replied while taking Tick Tock back.

"Please. Rules are for poor people." Lily's tone now had an edge to it, and she fixed a permanent sneer on her face as she adjusted a designer beach bag that had appeared on her shoulder. "Speaking of which, don't bother making eye contact with the help. It just encourages them."

"You're enjoying this, aren't you?" Dana asked.

"Quite." Lily walked on stiletto sandals along the sidewalk. "And when we get up the palace, you let me do all the talking."

"Happily."

As they continued up the hill, a trio of SUVs passed them by, but Dana was too busy staring at the Black Palace to give them any mind. If the Dragon's Pearl really was there, then it would mean she had salvaged this trip, and was one step closer to being alive.

She knew she should feel excited, or maybe even anxious. Instead, it felt like she was simply crossing one more item off her shopping list. Even worse, her mind kept slipping back to Oregon, and the sense of belonging she had felt there. She had never felt like she had belonged at Mike's house, but now she was starting to wonder if she had even given it a fair chance. Instead of talking with him or even asking for help, she had left a note behind explaining what she was doing—and that had been it.

If she had brought someone else with them, maybe the beginning of the trip wouldn't have been such a disaster. Then again, who could she have brought? The naga was content to lurk around in her labyrinth, and nobody else there could have passed for human anyway. Mike probably could have come, but that would have exposed him to danger, as well as—

"Well, fuck." Lily had come to a stop, her arms crossed over her chest. She was looking at a large metal gate up ahead with a security guard at it. "I didn't expect that to be an issue."

"Private security for the house?" Dana asked.

"Maybe. Though I suspect it's an extra you can hire, or..." Lily squinted. "Well, I'll be damned."

"Because you are," Dana muttered under her breath.

"The guard is wearing a Maximum Dragon shirt. Looks like our boy brought his own security team, though I suspect a few police academy dropouts won't be too difficult to handle."

No sooner had she spoken when a pair of men in black polos walked across the road behind the gate. They were both wearing shoulder harnesses and carrying walkie-talkies on a belt around their waist.

"Seriously, he's a porn star, not a prince. Seems a little over the top."

Lily shook her head. "It doesn't, actually. Think of the success this guy has seen already because of his magic. It makes you paranoid, remember? Scotes was freaking out over a magic flask that gave him free booze, but the pearl itself? If this guy really is becoming a dragon, he is amassing power, and he will do what he can to protect it. Hold up." She turned her attention to a sports car that was coming up the road with its top down. Inside were a couple of women who stopped at the gate and showed the guard something before continuing up. "I'm guessing the shoot hasn't started. Looks like the talent is still arriving."

They stood around for a few more minutes and watched a couple more cars arrive. After a few vehicles went inside, Lily took Dana by the arm and walked her up to the gate. When they drew near, Lily's features shifted a bit more until she was shorter than Dana. Her breasts and hips inflated, and her skin darkened until it was brown with golden undertones.

They were near the guard station now, and the man in the kiosk looked up from his computer. Recognition and surprise flitted across his face, and he frowned when he walked out.

"Can I help you?" he asked.

"Oh, honey, I'm sure you can." Lily's voice was dusky, and she put a hand on her hip. "Call me Mona De Ville, surely you've heard the name. Or, as the internet knows me, the gangbang queen."

"Uh..." He checked a clipboard he was carrying, then coughed nervously. "I'm afraid you're not on the list, Ms. De Ville."

"Of course, I'm not on the fucking list." Lily moved into the man's personal space. "I'm supposed to be retired now. Well, guess what? I live nearby and heard through the grapevine that Tristan motherfucking Edge is shooting here, and I will be damned if I do not get a look at that monster cock of his for myself."