Dear Diary - His New Toy

Ryan had been good for me on so many levels. Though I still dressed in a suit in the office, beneath my conversative exterior, I'd thrown away all the daily underwear I'd been wearing and began wearing lower cut brassieres that supported my breasts more firmly, and bikini panties. They were a good compromise of comfort and sexy, and they did make me feel sexy, so much so that recently I'd started leaving an extra button open on my blouse to show off a little more breast. The less comfortable, but more racy stuff, I saved for the weekend, when I knew I wouldn't be wearing them for long.

I held his lips to my breasts for a long moment before I gently pushed him away. With a smile, I took his hand and pulled him toward the back of my apartment. He followed, and as soon as we were in my bedroom, he stepped in front me and turned to face me.

"You know you don't have to do this?" he whispered.

"I know," I murmured as I pulled off my glasses and placed them aside on the dresser, having learned from experience that if I didn't, they ended up smeared, bent, or broken. "I have something for you, something I want you to do for me."

That wickedly sexy smile of his appeared. "Gladly."

I smiled, excited and nervous. I stepped away from him and opened the drawer of my bedside table and pulled out the toy. When I turned with it in my hand, his eyes flicked from the fleshlight, to my face, back to the toy, and then back to my face.

"Is that a...?"

"Yes."

He slumped slightly. "Michelle, we don't have to do--"

"I want you to."

"You know I don't mind if we can't--"

"I know," I said, cutting him off again. "But I want you to. I want to watch you fuck it." When he didn't respond I continued. "Please?" He continued to hold my gaze, and shame washed over me.

I told you this was a bad idea! my angel snapped.

Well... shit... my devil muttered.

"If you don't want to, that's okay," I said, my voice low, burning with embarrassment as I turned to return the toy to the drawer.

This is what happens when we forget who we are and start acting like a slut, my angle murmured. We need to stop listening to our worst instincts and act our age.

Shut the fuck up, bitch! my devil snarled in reply. Ryan likes us just like we are!

Exactly! Not like this!

"Wait," he said softly as I began to turn. "Why? Why do you want to do this?"

"It's okay," I murmured. "You don't have to if you don't want to."

"I didn't say that," he said, his voice kind as he closed the distance between us. "I just want to make sure you don't think you have to do this."

"I know. I want to. I don't like denying you, and--"

"Is that what you think... that you're denying me?"

"I am, and you know it. I don't like doing that. I want you, I want you so much... but I just... can't... sometimes."

"And that's okay."

"I know... but... it's hard to explain. I can't, but maybe with this... I can. I get to be with you... and please you... and..."

"And?" he prompted.

"And... I want to enjoy making love to you... even when I... can't"

He took the toy from me, tossed it onto the bed, and then wrapped my hands in his. "You know you're more than just someone to fuck, right? You understand that? You know I enjoy your company just as much as your body, right?"

"I know, and I feel the same way about you, but I want to do this. I want to, Ryan. I want to feel you next to me, and to make love to you... even when I can't."

He held my gaze for a long moment before he smiled softly and took my lips. "It won't be the same... no imitation is as good as the original, but if that's what you want," he whispered as he drew back.

"You don't mind?" I asked, almost wilting with relief. For a moment I thought I'd screwed up and had maybe damaged the best thing to ever happen to me.

"Not if it's what you want."

"It is. It really is." I swallowed hard and decided to go for broke. "Can you do one more thing for me tonight?"

He chuckled softly. "What?" he asked with a growling, teasing annoyance.

"Will you let me... control what you do?"

"What do you mean?"

"I... want to see how long you can last. You always fuck me until I'm ruined... but tonight, I want to do that to you. Please?" I asked, my tone almost begging.

"You know that goes both ways, right?" he asked with a smile. "Sometimes you make me come so fucking hard that I'm just gutted."

I smiled, pleased with his words. "Maybe, but tonight I want to push you... to really push you... and find out just what that cock of yours can do when you don't have to stop because I can't keep up. Can we do that tonight? Please?"

"Is that what you want?"

I slowly nodded. "Please? Just once, I want to see you totally wiped out."

"Have you forgotten about our first time together?"

I smiled. "No... but I was wiped out too, and if you recall, I had to cut you off the next morning." I smiled up at him. "Not this time. Tonight, if you're up for it, I'm going to fuck you until you're begging me to stop."

He said nothing for a long moment before he pulled me into him for a slow, erotic kiss before he slowly backed away, stepped behind me, and began undressing me as he nuzzled my neck. I flooded with anticipation. I wanted him so badly, but I knew the moment I tried to accept him, the soreness that had faded throughout the day would return. I needed tonight to be ready for tomorrow night, but that in no way meant I wasn't turned on by his lips and hands as he slowly removed my clothes.

I began to squirm as he cupped my breasts, teasing their hard points with his fingers before his hands continued on, gliding across my stomach before sliding inside my skirt to nudge the cloth over my hips. As the fabric fell to a puddle at my feet, his hands slowly drifted over my flesh, his touch leaving behind crackling pleasure, to pull my blouse from my shoulders. I turned to face him, wearing only my bra and panties. He kissed me fully, all his initial reluctance gone as if it had never been.

"You are, without doubt, the sexiest woman I've ever known," he growled softly. "Nothing will never make me want to stop fucking you."

See, you fucking bitch? my devil growled. Now shut the fuck up, go away, and leave us alone!

I moaned softly as his words went straight to my pussy. I pulled his lips to mine for another torrid kiss, his words amplifying my need and hardening my resolution to find his limit. I broke from the kiss and began quickly unbuttoning his shirt, my hands quivering with excitement and desire. I ripped his shirt from his shoulders, and as I worked at his belt, I kissed and teased a nipple on his sculptured chest.

While he was no bodybuilder, he was lean and well-muscled. I knew he worked out regularly on his home gym, and it showed, and since the lockdowns had started, I thought he was sporting even more muscle definition then when we'd first met.

I'd never been much of one to go to the gym, but now, when I was at his house, rather than lounging around or watching television, I'd started working out using his equipment. I couldn't do anything about time and gravity, but I was working out once or twice a week to try to impress him. He was a terrific motivator, instructing and spotting me while wearing only a pair of exercise shorts that did nothing to hide his massive erection. Between his hard cock, and how he looked at me as I grunted and sweated in my tight-fitting tank top and stretchy pants, he made me feel attractive, sexy, and desired... so the nights I spent in his apartment, I worked my ass off for him.

It was slow going, but I'd dropped a few pounds, and though it was hard to tell, I wanted to believe that I was starting to tone up. Best of all, working up a sweat on the exercise equipment always led to another, sometimes sweaty, workout in his bedroom. The only exercise equipment we were using tonight I could hold in my hand, but that didn't mean he wasn't going to get a good workout.

I roughly shoved his pants and underwear down before I threw myself into his chest. We wrapped each other up as our tongues dueled. Most nights we made love, but tonight we were going to fuck.

After we'd taken our fill from the kiss, I turned him and shoved him backwards to bed. He sat with a bounce before I shoved him again, causing him to flop to the mattress on his back. I knelt, quickly untied his shoes, and ripped them, along with his socks, pants, and underwear from his body to leave him naked. Finished with him, I began removing my underthings. Though I was rearing to go, as he watched me, I forced myself to slow. I teasingly removed my bra, holding it over my breasts as the shoulder straps dangled from my shoulders for a long moment, taunting him with anticipation, before slowly allowing my breasts' lacy prison to fall away and drop it to the floor. Watching him, I smiled as I hooked my panties with my thumbs, and then with a slow rocking of my hips, I eased them over my thighs before they joined the rest of our clothes on the floor. He watched my final undressing with rapt attention, his cock steel hard and weeping for me.

Look at that hard fucking cock! We're going to make that big fucking cock come all over the fucking place! There's not going to be even a drop of come left in that sexy motherfucker's balls when we're through with him!

I wanted him. I wanted him so badly! I forced myself to turn to the drawer. I extracted the lubricant and then joined him on the bed. I opened the cap on the lube and tried to squirt a dollop onto my finger, but it didn't work. Growling in frustration, I unscrewed the lid, pulled away the sealing foil, and then screwed the lid back on. Thank God I'd thought to check before we got down to business.

Snapping open the cap again, I squirted a tiny dollop onto my finger before I wiped it over his cock, blending the bottled lubricant with his own, naturally slippery juices. It made his cock incredibly slick as I slowly slid my hand over his shaft. Making sure the cap was closed, I tossed the bottle aside to join the toy. I'd get to those, but first...

I kissed the head of his cock and tickled it with my tongue before taking as much of him into my mouth as possible. The lube smelled and tasted vaguely of strawberries. Despite repeated attempts, and my best efforts, I couldn't quite swallow all of him without gagging, and over the past few months had learned to content myself with taking most of his length. He fell back to the bed with a deep and sexy groan as I held him in my mouth while gently scratching his balls with my nails.

"Fuck, Michelle..." he growled as he placed his hands lightly on my head, and I thrilled with his words.

I pulled him from between my lips and moved away, pushing the toy and lube aside before tugging on him. He scooted farther up in the bed and turned so he was aligned with its length. I draped myself over his chest to kiss him deeply, my leg resting on his as I slowly caressed his cock.

"You're sure you don't mind doing this for me," I whispered as our lips slowly parted.

"No... not so long as it's for you."

I nodded slowly before taking his lips again. We kissed long and deep before I left his lips and began kissing my way down his body, my lips dancing over his chest, my fingers caressing the path of his scar as I slowly worked my way down his body. When I began to turn in the bed, he wrapped an arm around my leg and dragged me around.

Do it! my devil urged. Let that sexy fucker eat our pussy until we come!

No! my angel countered. We're still a little sore, and it wouldn't be fair to him tomorrow if we can't go!

It was one of the few times my angel won an argument with my devil with regards to Ryan. "No," I murmured as I pulled against his tug. "Let me do this for you."

"I want to," he rumbled.

"I know... and I want you to, but I'm saving for the weekend. Just let me take care of you tonight."

He released my leg and I smiled. He was such a good man. I worked my way lower before purring and cooing as I played with his member, feathering my lips over its tip as I gently stroked him between finger and thumb as he slowly, softly, caressed my ass and thigh. I debated how I wanted to play. Did I want to suck him off, and then see how long he could fuck, or did I want to watch him fuck the toy until he came? After several long moment of slow kisses and licks as I debated with myself, I finally decided on fucking.

I swallowed him deep, his soft gasping groan always exciting me. When I couldn't hold him any longer, I flung myself back, spun in the bed, and took his lips in a blistering kiss. He wrapped me up and held me tight as we devoured each other. I considered draping myself over him while fucking him with the toy, but I wasn't sure my resolve would hold, and I was afraid I'd end up with my pussy against his lips.

So? my devil whispered.

It's not fair to him if he makes us sore again, my angel rebuked. She'd discovered her trump card and wasn't afraid to play it.

I slowly pulled away from his lips. "Ready to fuck your pussy?" I whispered. He looked at me in confusion, and I smiled. "I bought it for you, and it's yours, but remember..." I gripped his chin and held his gaze while trying to look stern, "my pussy was given to you first, so my pussy has the option of first refusal, understand?"

He smiled, not buying my tough act for a second. "As I said before, why would I want the knockoff when I can have the real thing." A brief smile flickered across his lips. "Remember, I'm doing this because you want it, not me. If you're not involved, I'm not interested."

Take the deal! That fucking cock belongs to us!

Yes, my angel agreed. Take the deal!

When I was at his house, we always made love, so he wouldn't need it there. I smiled before kissing him fully. I slowly pulled back, my smile still on my lips. "Okay. I'll keep it here." I paused as I brought my lips closer to his. "Now, I want you to fuck my pussy." He looked at me quizzically, and I realized how that must have sounded. "If you're giving it back to me, then it's my pussy," I cooed, and I saw him smile when he realized what I was saying.

"So... it's always your pussy I'm fucking?" he rumbled.

"Now you're catching on."

He pulled my lips to his. "I love fucking your pussy," he whispered before taking my lips.

We kissed long and deep before I pulled my lips from his and picked up the toy, lube, and a pillow as he sat up. I placed the toy on the pillow and patted it in encouragement. He understood what I wanted and tumbled to his knees before positioning the pillow between his legs. The toy was too low, so we add the other pillow on top of the first, and that raised the device to almost the perfect height.

As he positioned himself, I snuggled into his back. I squirted a healthy dollop of lube onto the head of his cock and carefully smeared it down his length. "Now fuck my pussy," I whispered into his ear.

He guided his cock into opening, and I moaned quietly as I peeked around him to see his cock sliding into the toy as he pinned it to the pillow with one hand.

"Feel good?" I murmured as he began slowly rocking his hips, his glistening cock sliding easily into the toy.

In way of answering, he pulled my lips to his for a torrential kiss. "Fuck... your pussy feels good," he rumbled as our lips slowly parted.

I hope we haven't made a mistake. What if it feels better than we do? my angel asked.

Fuck that! He's fantasizing about fucking us. We heard him. 'Fuck... your pussy feels so good.'

What if he likes it better?

It can't fuck him like we can. Now kiss that sexy fucker to remind him of what the real thing can do.

"You like my pussy fucking your cock?" I purred as my lips danced over his.

He paused his slowly thrusting hips to focus on my face. "It'll do... when the real thing isn't available."

I couldn't stop my smile. "You like the original better than the backup?"

He pulled my lips to his again. "Much better," he growled before taking my lips.

He began thrusting again. As I slowly pulled out of the kiss, I couldn't stop watching his cock repeatedly sliding into the toy. His cock looked huge as it slowly pistoned in the clear tube, and I groaned softly with my own need. God, I so needed him to fuck me. Tomorrow I was going to give that plastic bitch a run for her money.

I pressed myself more firmly into his muscular back, the feel of him under my flatten breasts and the brush of his hips inside my thighs as I held him close erotic in the extreme. "Harder. Fuck my pussy harder," I whispered into his ear before I began kissing his neck.

After a long moment of fucking, he paused, added another dribble of lube, and then began fucking the toy with more urgency. I moved my hips back slightly and reached between his legs to gently caress and cradle his balls. He flung his head back with a gasp before turning to face me, seized my hair with his free hand, and pulled my lips to his. He began to growl softly as his thrusts became more forceful.

Don't let that sexy fucker come!

I fought my way out of the kiss and began playing with his balls again. "Don't come," I demanded. "Keep fucking my pussy, but don't come."

"Fuck... Michelle," he groaned, clearly in erotic distress, the strain in his voice excited me far more than I realized it would.

"Don't you fucking come until I tell you to!" I ordered.

"Fuck," he barked as he rammed his cock deep and held it there.

Well... that didn't take long, my devil muttered in disappointment.

"I told you not to come," I teased as I feathered kisses over his neck. I'd give him a minute or so to recover, but then he was going to start again.

"I didn't," he snarled as he pulled my lips from his neck to his lips.

He began thrusting hard and fast as our kiss dissolved before he plunged his cock deep again. "Mother... fuck!" he snarled.

I reached around him, gripped the toy, and began stroking him rapidly with it.

"Michelle! Fuck! You're going to make me fucking come!" he barked as he gripped my hand and held the toy hard against the base of his cock as he thrust and bucked.

Holy fuck this is hot! my devil howled in delight.

After a moment his lunging hips stilled, and then a moment after that, he began to relax. I released the device to cradle his balls again. "Fuck..." he growled as he pulled me into a blisteringly hot kiss. "You are an evil, evil, woman," he rumbled as our lips slowly parted.

"Did you come?" I asked, unable to erase my smile. This was turning out to be everything I hoped.

He sighed hard and deep. "Not yet... no thanks you, you evil bitch."

I giggled, enjoying myself immensely. I squeezed his nuts gently. "Then you're not done."

With a groan he began fucking the toy with slow, deep thrusts. His eyes closed and his face twisted with pleasure, my hands roaming his body as I kissed his neck and chest and played with his scrotum. He paused occasionally, but only long enough to add a bit of slickness, before resuming his leisurely thrusts.

"Harder," I whispered into his chest. "Faster. My pussy needs to be fucked harder and faster."

With a groan, he did as I asked, placing both hands around the device as he began thrusting into it with more speed and power. I picked up the lube and dribbled a bit more over his cock as it hammered into the toy. I didn't want him stopping again.

"Oh God... oh fuck..." I whispered into his ear. "You're fucking my pussy so hard," I breathed. "Don't stop. Don't stop fucking my pussy."

"Fuck... fuck... fuck!" he snarled as he rammed his cock deep and paused.