Defiant Destiny Ch. 09

'How strange for an angel to be inside of a demon's den,' I thought, then quietly scoffed at the irony of that thought. I opened the office door as silently as possible and snuck onto the upper floor hallway to take a peek.

I saw them convene near the large doors and my eyes were helplessly drawn to Dante and his ladies. It was phenomenal how loving he was towards his succubi. I had never heard of a Demonic Lord that treated his succubi as anything other than objects, properties. Yet this soulless demon respected them - loved them, as he told me earlier. So remarkable.

I prevented an envious sigh from escaping my lips - what I wouldn't give for someone to love and protect me like that. Unconditionally.

I glanced at his strong arms, draped around one of his succubi and felt a pang of longing deep in my heart. I cast my eyes down and sighed louder than intended, stupidly giving away my position to the grand angel he was conversing with. Quickly I turned the corner and pressed myself against the wall, silently cursing myself for drawing their attention to me.

The coldness of the stone wall seeped through Dante's robe that I still wore, stiffening the muscles in my back. I clenched my fists hard and blinked, letting a tear fall to the floor. As much as I wanted to stay here, longed to stay with Dante, with an aching heart I determined I had overstayed my welcome. It was impossible for me to remain here while his succubi were irresistibly drawn to me. It was impossible for me not to hurt them with my despicable existence.

I pushed myself off the wall, taking a moment to calm down my rapidly beating heart and ignored that internal voice that was furiously yelling at me that I was making a monumental mistake. I was immensely grateful for Dante's help and the safety I so deeply longed for, but I couldn't bother him any longer with my damned pure soul.

Silently, I snuck out of the office. Being hunted all the time had honed my skills in knowing where I could escape, and I had seen a fire escape leading out. I climbed to the roof, suppressing a shiver upon seeing the darkness loom above me. As much as I hated it, it provided me with the necessary cover I needed to fly away.

I took off Dante's robe that I still wore after he offered me his bathroom to clean up. Holding it I brought it to my face and deeply inhaled his scent that still lingered on the fabric. With a wry smile I hoped his scent would bring me some comfort in the coming days, until I managed to steal some proper clothes again.

Another tear escaped me while I unfurled my wings. I ruthlessly suppressed that insisting feeling that my place was here with Dante, and I took off into the night sky, feeling the wind dry the tears that streaked down my face.

In the distant past I had been safe from demons when I spent my nights on top of the grand spire of the cathedral, but since modern man loved to emphasize their creations in colossal beams of light, I resorted to hiding near the large aviaries keeping the birds of paradise in the zoo. I had spent several uneventful nights here before, though the birds did get restless with my presence, not allowing me to get much sleep. Ah well, I'd see in the morning.

***Dante***

If I didn't know any better, I would have never believed Alexis to be an angel. That lopsided grin of his, along with that wicked sparkle in his eyes and his radical suggestion were anything but angelic. I knew it wasn't possible, but if this man had turned out to be a demon in disguise all this time, I would accept it, hands down.

Eir looked at him with a questioning frown marring her face, after which Alexis turned to her and they proceeded to stare into each other's eyes without moving a muscle. I made a mental note that those private messages between mates were nowhere near as subtle as I thought they were.

The incredibly soft sound of a door closing upstairs echoed softly down into the factory hall. The sound had me on high alert instantly, and made my demon wake with a snarl. I spun around and leapt up the stairs, rushing towards the office where Aurora was hiding only to find her gone. She was here a mere minute ago! I had seen her peek from the upstairs balcony...

"Aurora?" I called out loudly and checked the other upstairs rooms. There were no signs of a break in or a struggle - everything was just the way I left it, except for my delicate angel.

"Aurora!?" I yelled again at the top of my lungs. While her scent lingered upstairs, she was nowhere to be found.

I closed my eyes and stretched my senses as far as I could, but I couldn't detect her at all... She was gone, and so sudden too. This didn't feel right... My demon roared fearfully in my mind, not liking this anymore than I did.

Cyrea ran into my office, followed by the rest. "Where's Aurora?" she asked with clear concern in her voice.

I let out the worried breath I'd been holding unintentionally and opened my eyes to see the troubled faces of my friends.

"She's gone..." I growled, while my demon roared in agony. "I don't know where she went, I cannot sense her anymore..."

My demon went livid in my mind, drowning out the soft chatter from my friends with his fierce growls and restless pacing.

"She cannot protect herself... She cannot fight the incubi..." he growled urgently and snarled angrily.

I heavily dragged my hands across my face in despair, racking my brain - I didn't understand why she would leave.

"I know! She knows this too... but... she left anyway... Why would she? I told her I would protect her, that she could stay here..." I replied, staring at the door hiding the fire escape to the roof.

My demon paced restlessly in my mind, ferociously growling and snarling in frustration and fear for Aurora.

"She hurt you by hurting Layla... She couldn't stay... It would happen again..." he growled in his gravelly voice.

"Yes, but we..." I objected.

"She does not want to hurt YOU!" my demon interrupted me. "She cares for you...

My hands dropped to my side. Me? She left so she couldn't hurt me? I stared hard at the fire escape door. But... Aurora would be safe here... Despite her irresistible soul, we would have made it work somehow! Even before I knew Alexis had a plan that could work, I was certain we would figure something out! She didn't have to leave. She didn't have to subject herself to all that torment all over again to protect me...

I sighed deeply in frustration. Thoughts of Aurora roaming the city alone with no way to defend herself made me restless. My claws dug into my hands as I clenched and unclenched my fists, ready to tear up any and all incubi that might even think of touching her, of hurting Aurora.

"I need to find her. I care too much for her to just leave her to her fate," I decided, my growl fuelled by an elated roar from my demon. "I need to at least tell her there's a way out of this hellhole of a life - that there's a way she could stay here, that..."

A soft touch on my shoulder startled me greatly and I snarled loudly at the intruder, fangs bared, eyes ablaze. Cyrea simply returned my furious gaze with a warm, gorgeous smile and sent me a big dose of love through our bond. I blinked in confusion upon seeing her smiling face and winced my eyes shut in shame when I noticed the confused faces of my friends - I had been so caught up in my thoughts that I had completely forgotten they were here.

Cyrea softly cradled my face in her slender hands. Her curls tickled my arms as her scent tickled my nose, while she placed the sweetest, softest kiss on my forehead.

"Aurora needs you, my love - even if she does not realize this," she whispered ever so softly.

My fingers trembled with adrenaline when I covered Cyrea's hands with mine. I breathed in her scent deeply, but it did little to calm me this time. I opened my eyes - both my demon and me now stared into her deep blue irises.

"Find her. Help her," Cyrea whispered, her soft breath tickling my face.

My demon roared in my mind, urging me to go. I nodded curtly, not trusting my voice.

"I'll join you, Dante," Alexis called out, taking off his shirt and handing it to Eir with a quick kiss. "But we must hurry, for dawn is not far off,"

I looked at my angelic friend and saw the steel determination on his face. "Thank you, my friend," I half whispered, half growled.

Alexis nodded in reply, "Let's go."

I turned to Cyrea to give her a deep kiss and rushed out the door to the fire escape, the remnants of Aurora's scent making me pick up my pace. Before we even reached the roof, I unfurled my wings and quickly scoured the city skyline. The sound of rustling feathers drew my gaze to my angelic friend and I couldn't suppress a smile at seeing his restored wings. He looked magnificent.

"I'll take the south and west, you cover the north and east," I suggested, to which he nodded and flew off without a sound as only angels could do. I too jumped up high and began searching for Aurora from above, desperately hoping we'd find her.

***

Alexis and I scoured the city for hours until the first rays of sun reddened the sky and we were forced to halt our search. We didn't find her.

I contemplated searching for her on foot, but that would be futile - from the sky it was like finding a needle in a haystack, so from the ground it would be utterly useless. Furthermore, I was beyond exhausted.

After Alexis and Eir returned home, I crawled into bed next to a sleeping Cyrea and a snoring Layla. Thoughts of Aurora circled in my mind, worry warring with exhaustion. Memories of crazed incubi molded my drowsy dreams, alternating with images of Aurora's teary face.

Yet the image that stuck with me, that awoke something very deep down inside of me, was the memory of me barging in my office to find her gone... Her painful absence, so suddenly... Without warning...

It triggered a horrible feeling in the back of my mind that I had been brutally suppressing for the past nine years... Right now, however, I was too exhausted to block it anymore and I felt its dreaded claws sink deep into my soul as sleep captured my weary mind.

***

It took me a long moment to get my bearings. My vision was blurry, as if my eyes were filled with tears I could not blink away. After a while I was able to discern some familiar details - TV, couch, rug...

Wait... This was...

I looked around and took a tentative step forward, letting my hand graze the worn backrest of the brown couch in the middle of the living room. The texture felt so real as my fingers grazed it. So incredibly real.

I sat down on the couch, hearing the oh so familiar creak and smelled that wonderful scent of...home. I was back home.

But... That was impossible... This house was sold years ago, there'd be no way it would contain our stuff...

Unbelieving, I let my eyes travel around the room - this was unmistakably the house I grew up in. Invisible details that I had grown so accustomed to seeing daily, suddenly seared their way into my brain - picture frames containing childhood photos, a drawing I made of our first dog when I was a toddler.

I was back...home? Impossible... I had not been home since...

A curt knock on the door startled me.

"Mom? Dad?" I felt my dream-self casually call out as I walked towards the front door to answer it, habitually peeking up the stairs to see if they were upstairs. My gaze traveled along the side table next to the stairs containing some plants that my mother desperately tried to keep alive, but kept failing miserably. I chuckled, remembering the countless times she tried to convince my father and me that the plant was not dead, but merely sleeping. I couldn't count the number of times I recommended a fake plant to her.

A newspaper lay beside the plants and a horrifying chill ran up my spine when I noticed the date: March 23rd, 2013. A sudden painful desperation tightened my chest, making me want to drop to the floor in despair, but my body wouldn't obey. Whatever control I thought I had was gone and I became a passenger in my own body.

My dream self merely gazed at the date and approached the door like nothing was out of the ordinary. Another knock on the door. "I'm coming!" I heard my annoyed voice call out to the impatient visitor.

No! No... No! NO!!! Please, no!

I wanted to scream or cry, to turn around and run away as fast as my legs could carry me. That pain of desperation in my chest became worse and spread through my body with each panicked heartbeat. I knew this pain too well... I had succumbed to it before...

Another knock at the door. I felt myself approach the door to answer it.

'I don't want to open the door... No... Turn back, Dante, don't do it!' my thoughts raced through my head. I knew exactly what would happen in this dream, but was unable to stop my dream-self from walking to the front door and answering it, like watching a movie play before your eyes. A horror movie.

The door swung open, revealing two figures whose compassionate faces had haunted my nightmares for years. I felt the initial surprise clutching my stomach as I felt it that day upon seeing those two officers on our doorstep, and I heard my voice ask, "Hello officers, how may I help you?"

The two uniformed men seemed to assess me - the younger one had his eyes pinned on mine, gauging my reactions, as if he was waiting for me to attack him or run away. The older one of the two had a neutral, yet friendly face. His brown eyes looked deep into mine.

Oh, those eyes... How I deeply longed to forget those eyes...

"Are you Dante Vandyke?" he asked me softly. I remember noticing that he was on edge when he asked me the question. At the time I had no idea why this man would be nervous. How blissfully ignorant I still was at that moment.

"Yes, I am," I heard my voice answer him.

The brown eyed man cleared his throat, took off his cap and held it behind his back. "May we come in, Mr. Vandyke? We have something important to tell you."

My eyes traveled from the older to the younger officer and back again. "Sure, come on in."

I tried to scream at myself in the dream, to prevent my legs from moving with all my might, but it was useless. Step by step, my dream-self took me closer to the spot where my life would fall apart.

Details I hadn't noticed at the time, now really stood out to me - like how both officers sat at the edges of their seats and carefully kept assessing my behavior. The older officer took a deep breath. His voice was soft, apologetic even.

"We are here to deliver bad news. We believe your parents Steve and Rebecca were both killed in a car crash this morning," he spoke slowly but clearly, his brown eyes fixated on mine.

Even though I had gone through this exact moment in my nightmare countless times, it still gripped me like none other. I felt myself go down that long, pitch black corridor of pain and tears, losing my grip on reality, losing my grip on this dream. Memories of my parents mixed in with the nightmare, cycling through an emotional rollercoaster.

Until...

"As difficult as this may be for you, we need you to come in and identify the bodies to confirm..."

Warm, feverish blackness consumed me as I was whisked away from my living room and found myself standing in the lifeless, industrial-like corridor of the morgue with its bleak gray colors, linoleum floors and ominously flickering fluorescent lights. My nightmares often brought me back to this exact spot - right in front of the double steel doors with the words "Exam room 2" on its sterile white sign.

This was the worst.

This was THE absolute worst...

My final memory of them - of their damaged corpses...

All the panic and dread that washed over me earlier in the dream were nothing compared to the soul wrenching terror that surged through my system at this moment. Grief made my chest clench painfully with each sobbing breath, and my heart mercilessly pumped that pain through my body, making me groan in despair. I stared long and hard at the stainless steel of the door handle, trying to unsee the image I would see upon entering the door - two gurneys holding aloft parent shaped white sheets. I knew the sight that would greet me when I would lift the sheets... A sight I desperately tried to forget...

Despite knowing this, despite NOT wanting to open that door with every fiber of my being, I felt my treacherous arm raise itself and my fingers shakily curl around its cold steel.

'No... Please... No... Dante, don't do this...' I weakly begged my dream-self, knowing how futile it was. My dream-self never listened...

Tears flooded my cheeks and panicked sobs escaped my burning chest. My heart rate thundered in my head with an exploding ferocity. My entire body was shaking in pained grief, yet I felt my grip tighten upon the door handle, my muscles preparing to open it.

Wincing and sobbing, I braced myself for the emotional onslaught that I knew would ensue.

Suddenly a soft warm hand covered mine, gently rubbing its thumb across my hand.

What was this?

What happened?

I looked at the slender hand, recognizing it instantly, but not knowing whose it was inside this dream world. My eyes followed the stranger's hand up to the most gorgeous face I had ever seen - a teary eyed face warmed by a sad smile, framed by luscious crimson curls.

I blinked furiously, expelling the tears that were blurring my vision.

"Cyrea?" I croaked in a broken voice. "How... How are you... What..." I stumbled, confusion warring with grief in my mind.

Her slender hand lovingly caressed my shaking one that tightly gripped the door handle. My iron grip on the steel turned my knuckles white.

"Don't open the door, Dante," she whispered softly.

New tears welled up in my eyes and my face contorted into an agonizing grimace. My lungs erratically forced air in and out of my lungs as I heaved in agony.

"I... I have to... I have no choice..." I squeaked in a half whisper and squeezed more tears from my eyes.

A heartfelt sob escaped Cyrea's lips and she cupped my teary face with her other hand. With a sob of my own I leaned into her touch.

"I don't want to open it, Cyrea... I don't... But I cannot stop myself," I heaved tearfully, almost hyperventilating.

Cyrea sighed shakily and rubbed her hand soothingly along my face. A few stray tears slowly escaped her sorrowful eyes.

"Yes, you can, my dear Dante. This is your dream, you can change it - any time you'd like," she spoke softly with an emotional voice.

I felt the muscles in my arm tense in preparation of opening the door handle, and I hated myself for being too weak to stop this. Cyrea leaned in to place a tender kiss on my cheek, kissing the tears away.

"You can do this, Dante," she whispered against my skin, resting her forehead against my cheek.

The feel of her touch on my cheek was a bigger relief than I could have hoped. I closed my eyes to savor her softness and breathed her in deeply, forcing her scent deep into my lungs before the air rushed out again in a sorrowful sob.

Her soothing scent drove away the burning grief in my chest with every breath I took. Her touch eased my terrorized mind. Cyrea's hand still covered mine, and she felt my muscles shakily release their steel grip on the metal handle.

"That's it, Dante, that's it..." I felt her whisper in my neck as she rested her head on my shoulder, her curls cascading over my back.

Her skin on mine, her scent in the air and her breath tickling the goosebumps in my neck were a lifeline that pulled me out of the dark maelstrom of misery I had fallen into. These few minutes felt like years, but with a trembling sigh I finally managed to let go of the handle, the muscles in my hand cramped from having gripped it so tightly.