Detachment Ch. 01-05

Author's Note:

Hey, everyone! Welcome to Detachment, a very steamy, friends-to-lovers, new adult romance novel! This is my second published book, and it's a standalone sequel to Hopeium, a less steamy but super romantic novel that I co-wrote with my author friend D.J. Thompson. As a standalone novel, this story occurs in the same universe as Hopeium and has some overlap in the form of light character crossovers [Marcus from this story first appears briefly in Hopeium], but you don't have to read Hopeium to know what's going on with Marcus or Kylie in this story!

Detachment is a full-length romance novel (~80k words), so it'll follow all the usual beats that comes with the genre. That being said, if you're looking for a nice long read where two close friends slowly fall in love before things get spicy, you're in the right place! But if all you're looking for is chapter-after-chapter of sex, I'm afraid this is one of those books where you'll have to wait until around chapter 14 before you get to enjoy reading the explicit scenes. I'll be uploading this story in blocks of ~five chapters, so if you get involved with this story and can hold out until part 3, that's when things get spicy!

Lastly, this story deals with a wife who finds strays when things with her emotionally abusive husband take a turn, so if you're not a fan of cheating spouses or stories that involve emotional abuse, this might be a story you want to skip. Also, the male main character is battling depression after losing his mother to cancer, so fair warning if any of that is triggering to anyone.

Alright, that's my intro. If you end up liking this story, please follow me for updates!

Enjoy the read!

PROLOGUE

Kylie

The Big Day

As I walk down the aisle arm-in-arm with my grandfather, I stare at my soon-to-be husband, who's grinning at me from the altar, thinking not of him but instead back to a moment of weakness that has left me questioning everything...

A memory of something that should have never happened...

A secret no one can ever know about...

A night I struggle to forget daily...

But here I am, smiling back at Travis, forcing myself to match his excitement as I take my place at the altar before all of our friends and family, following through with my promise to go through with the 'I do.' Because I wouldn't be here if this isn't what I wanted.

Right?

Be better. Try harder. Show him every day that I care.

Whatever it takes to make love work.

And then we lock eyes.

From that brief glance, it's clear that our secret is eating away at him, too...

Chapter 1

Marcus

A Year Later

Thursday, August 29

If there's one lesson that the cruel, unrelenting professor we call life has taught me in recent years, it's that our time on Earth is far too precious to waste on things that do not matter or on anything that you aren't wildly passionate about, completely enamored by, or crazy over.

Still, here I am on yet another date with this beautiful, intelligent, sweet woman that I feel nothing for, aside from lust... Here I am at a fancy restaurant overlooking the Boston Main Channel, wasting time and money on Nicolette, yet again, instead of devoting time to my flourishing business all in hopes that she eventually sparks the magical combination of emotions and endorphins that translates to the wild attraction and yearning that may one day bud into love—something I regretfully experienced once, or maybe twice, but cannot seem to find again.

Because I'm emotionally crippled and incapable of feeling after everything that's happened ...

"Did you hear me, Marcus?" Nicolette asks, leaning forward, her thin brow arched.

I clear my throat. "Sorry, Nicolette ... My mind is going in twenty different directions, per usual. What'd you say?"

"No worries! It's not like you didn't warn me how scatterbrained you've been lately. And it's not like this is the first time you zoned out on me ..." She smirks.

I place my hand on hers, noting how much darker than normal my caramel skin looks in contrast with her extremely fair complexion. "I'm so sorry! I promise I'll be better."

"Seriously, it's okay. You're still healing and you've got so many exciting things happening right now. It's a lot to process. Honestly, I'm grateful you're even taking the time to go out with me again!" She giggles. "It's actually quite flattering!"

"Well, you're worth it." But is she though? I signal the waiter. "Let me get you another glass of wine to make up for me being a shitty date."

She smiles. "Well, I won't say no to that ..."

"Another glass of that Pinot Noir for the lady," I say to the waiter. Looking back at her, I ask, "Okay, so what were you saying?"

"I asked what's next for you now that your influencer client's book is out and making you richer by the second? Will you be getting back into fiction writing?"

My head bobbles. "I have a sequel in progress that I want to finish, but I might try my hand at non-fiction next. My blog has helped quite a few people. With all the questions I get on there and on Twitter, I figure providing my growing audience with a roadmap to help them also achieve the success that they're seeking might be a good way to help the most people. And while I'm working on that, I'm going to build my online marketing agency. Then on to real estate."

Nicolette smiles, brushing her red locks out of her face and back behind her ear. "You're, like, the most amazing person ever, you know that?"

Does she think I'm amazing because I'm twenty-five and I'm on track to building the empire I've always dreamed of building or is she just saying that because she's trying to land a sugar daddy to pay off all her student loans?

I don't think she's a gold-digger, but a guy as financially independent as me can't help but consider it.

"If you say so." I laugh. "Thanks, but really, I'm not all that amazing. I took too long to act once, so, after losing my mother, I've just became extremely determined. I took a risk and I invested everything I had into my dreams so I could achieve some semblance of happiness while I am still young and healthy. It just happened to work out for me because my first book came out at the right time."

"It worked out because you made it work. Either way, it's still amazing, Marcus! Especially because you did it all on your own."

"Yeah, and that's why I'm so damn burnt out."

"Why not hire someone?"

"I'm thinking about it actually. My loans are paid off. I just closed on a house. Probably a good time to allocate some funds towards hiring someone to help with the day-to-day tasks."

"Oh, goodie! Maybe then you'll finally have more time for me!" She winks, rubbing her foot against my leg under the table.

"I suppose I can add another hour or two of Nicolette time to my calendar..." I smirk.

Nicolette Barringer and I have been seeing each other for a few weeks now. She's college educated. She has a well-paying job in finance. She loves Marvel movies as much as I do. She's very attractive and fit as all hell. She's apolitical and isn't too extreme in the vein of religious beliefs. She's not a manipulative psychopath like my ex, Erin... She's super supportive and caring. And she's a goof. On paper she checks almost all of the boxes.

So why don't I feel anything for her?

Because I'm comparing her to a girl I'll never have.

Because I'm emotionally unavailable after a year of suffering mental torture at the hands of Erin.

Because, after losing my mother less than a year ago, it still takes everything I have just to hold it together most days...

Me and Nicolette? It's not going to work out. Not now. Had I met her a few years ago, or maybe even a few months or a year from now, I could see us going the distance. But after weeks of dating, after spending several nights with each other and talking late into the night, after all the great sex, I'm still not feeling that connection. I'm still not thinking about her before I go to bed at night or first thing when I wake up in the morning. I don't miss her when we're not together. And it sucks, because she's great. She's just not amazing...

I've tried for as long as I have because I do enjoy spending time with her and I do like her. But that something more is missing. And I can't help worry that once I finally find that spark, she'll end up cheating on me or things will go south after investing so much effort and time into making it work when I should've been focusing on building my empire instead.

I owe her the benefit of the doubt, though. Not all women are out to ruin your life or mentally manipulate you. And my gut tells me that she's one of the good ones.

I hoped frequent exposure, proximity, and hooking up would eventually spark all those things in me. But, if it hasn't happened yet, it's probably not going to. And I feel like complete shit because now I feel like I've been stringing her along all this time. And she doesn't deserve that. She's too great of a woman to be wasting time with someone who's not reciprocating her feelings—with someone who probably won't anytime soon.

Who am I to rob her of a chance of meeting the right person while I'm here struggling to make myself feel something that's not there?

I should've ended things weeks ago...

Her hand brushes mine on the walk to the parking garage. Then her fingers slide into my hand. "Since your place is all packed up for the move, how about we go to mine? We can cuddle up and binge-watch more How I Met Your Mother..."

Ugh, I love that she loves my favorite show... "Nicolette, there's something I think I need to say..."

Friday

Technothrillers, that's my genre of choice. The first book I self-published, Sentinels: Axiom, took off the way it did because the plot happened to play out eerily similarly to a thwarted domestic terrorist attack that some trust-fund brat launched in DC with plans to follow up in several cities across the nation. The opportunist in me media-jacked the trending news to market my work, and it sold like crazy. It was the right timing. Just not at the right time. My mom passed away before she got to finally experience my finished work and witness its success...

That will always be my greatest failure.

I failed because I wasted months upon months with a girl that I knew I should've never been with in the first place instead of finishing those last ten chapters.

I vowed to never fail that way again when it comes to my craft and my business.

Failure when it comes to establishing a healthy romantic relationship... well, that's a different story.

Originally, fiction writing was just a way to deal with boredom during summers between semesters in college. Then I got serious and it became a hobby that I hoped would become a career. But, in light of recent events, it has also become my coping mechanism. Instead of finishing up that blog post and scheduling it to post like I was supposed to, I woke up early and starting typing away at the unfinished Sentinels sequel, Sentinels: Rancor—something I wouldn't have done if I woke up naked beside Nicolette like I would have had I not ended things last night...

Today, I write to escape the guilt of breaking her heart, amongst all the other things I need to distract myself from. But better now before she started falling for me. I'll write until I can't anymore. Then I'll do some SEO keyword research and finish that blog. And then I'll reach out to the person I'm hoping will be my first employee.

Time evaporates the way it often does when I'm lost in my craft. The next thing I know, it's 12:09 p.m., which means I've worked through my exercise timeslot. Again. At this point, it's been five hours since that bacon, egg, and cheese bagel and now I'm too hungry to workout.

That's a later problem...

With my lunch heating up in the oven, I lie across the couch and then I check my phone. When I'm really in the zone, I dare not touch my cell. Unless I hear a specific text or call sound assigned to those important people in my life who I never neglect, like my dad or my college family. Of course, today, I forgot to take my phone off of vibrate, so I did miss texts from my dad and a few from my best friend Kai Chen.

I call my dad first to check up on him. Then I text Kai back in the group chat we have going with our college friend group—him, his wife Cecilia, and her sister Cassie Tran—to put in my vote for which bar we're hitting up tonight. Now I hop on YouTube to find something to kill time until the food's hot.

The oven beeps a few minutes later. Right as I'm about to set it down, it chimes and a text from Kylie Mitchell-Dulaney appears on screen with her picture on the left. The smile that stretches across my face is reflexive. It's probably my first smile of the day. Being that she's by far one of my favorite humans of all time and also my favorite person from the job that I quit to pursue my business, I open it right away.

Kylie's text reads: Marcus! It's been too long! Also, it's still really shitty not having you at work...

I respond with: Kylie! Time to quit that place! And I was planning on inviting you out for drinks and dinner tonight. You free after work?

The response comes in as I'm placing the steaming grilled chicken breast onto the pretzel bun.

Kylie: Glad we haven't lost our telepathic connection! Hahaha. I have plans, but I'd much rather catch up with you instead of going out with my department lol.

Me: Hell yeah! I'm glad because I have a surprise for you! Our favorite bar at 4?

Kylie: Um, thanks a lot... Now my day is going to drag because I'm going to be too excited about this surprise!!! And YES! I'll be there. If I can get out early, I'll text you.

Me: Excellent! I'll have a Moscow Mule waiting for you.

Kylie: And this is why I miss having you around all the time! I can't wait!

While waiting for my sandwich to cool down, I sit at the counter and draft another text to the friend I've missed dearly.

Me: So, how's your day going? Tandy still making your life a living hell?

Chapter 2

Kylie

Friday

I'm at my desk, cheesing like an idiot the entire time I'm texting back and forth with Marcus because both of us are roasting these assholes I work with and work for. It's hard not to smile with him, even if he isn't saying something ridiculous. He's hilarious and somehow always seems to know what to say to make me smile when my day sucks. Which is pretty much all the time. Especially when I'm at this hellhole...

"Do you not have enough work to do, Kylie?" Tandy, my supervisor says from the cubicle's entrance, a stack of paperwork clutched under her arm.

Bitch is what I want to say. "Everything in my bin was finished before lunch today," is what I respond with instead.

"Oh, goodie! Then you wouldn't mind texting your husband after scanning in these files and compiling them into data packages, would you?"

"Sure, Tandy. Once I get back from lunch with my husband, I wouldn't mind at all," I say, doing my best not to make the sarcasm seem evident. "Also, I was actually texting Marcus. Marcus Jones, the guy that quit Quality Control a few months back."

She flashes a judgy look. "Oh... the funny guy. And how is Mr. Jones these days? Begging for his job back yet?"

I snicker on accident. "Psh, no way! He's doing pretty well for himself. Makes a heck of a lot more than when he was working here."

She bobbles her head as she leans back. "Well good for him! Tell him I said hello then. Email me when you're done with these." She sets down three quarters of her stack rather than splitting it in half. "They're due by end of day."

"I can't work overtime tonight. I have dinner plans."

"Better get to it then!"

"Ugh," I groan quietly once she's out of earshot.

I hate this job sooooo much...

If Travis and I weren't in such a financial mess, I'd go back to serving at a restaurant.

I grab my phone then text Marcus: I might be a little late tonight. Tandy just dropped a huge stack of certs on my desk... I'm probably going to have to cut lunch with Travis short now... Ugh...

His response comes in quick: Screw her... You're already over 40 hours for the week! That waste of space will leave before you today, per usual. Whether you finish or not, just leave when you want. They're too desperate to fire one of their hardest workers.

I reply with: Haha. Maybe. You going to cover my expenses after I get fired?

Marcus: I mean, if Travis doesn't then I guess I wouldn't have a choice lol.

Another text follows. This one is from Travis: Stuck in traffic. Be there in 20.

It's the lunch hour, so there shouldn't be anyone at the copier. Twenty minutes should be enough time to make a small dent in this stack of certificates of analyses and the corresponding quality-testing spreadsheets.

For some reason, I thought working as a technical support specialist at a supplement production plant would be better than crazy hours and long nights serving at a restaurant, but I was wrong. Sure, it pays better, the benefits are decent, and they're usually pretty flexible, but the management is horrible, and the work is tedious and thankless. If you're not being worked into the ground, you're not being a team player. The culture here dictates: 'Why hire someone new when one person can do the work of two. Or three!'

Travis got me out of working in food service by getting me a job here at Biossure Nutrition two years ago. He started here as a quality control tech with Marcus three years ago, and they pretty much became bros instantly after bonding over Walking Dead, Game of Thrones, and the Patriots.

Marcus and I met one time before I started working with him. It was at dinner and drinks with their coworkers before whatever Marvel movie came out that July. It didn't take many encounters for the quick-witted and intelligent goof to win over my friendship and to become one of my favorite people ever.

A week after Travis and I returned from the honeymoon, hubby left for a better job in the pharmaceutical industry with better pay. He's somewhat happier there, despite being a tad grumpy by the time he gets home every night. The only problem is, he's second shift so he could get the pay differential, which means we don't overlap as much as we'd like. It might be years before he can transfer back to first.

My days are longer without him. And much longer now that Marcus left too. At least when he was here, I still had a lunch buddy, someone to vent to, someone to count on for a good laugh, someone to get dinner with after work. After finally quitting here, Marcus disappeared from our lives so he could work on his writing and business. While I know that's true, I also know that, despite how well he tries hiding it, losing his mother sent him spiraling into a deep depression. The last few times I dropped off food for him following his mom's passing, I noticed the change in his smile. I saw him struggling to hold it together. It's been over a month since I've seen my bestie, so hopefully he's better now.