All Comments on 'Discoveries of a Young Man Pt. 05'

by Antarctica77

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  • 4 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Very pedestrian. Not an ounce of romance or sensuality

anubeloreanubeloreover 1 year ago

This is one of the few stories with infidelity in it that I've actually enjoyed, almost unreservedly. Anon, with no due respect, go piss up a rope.

I will say that you have a tendency to tell, instead of show. Google "show, don't tell" for an explanation. Basically, it's when an author "tells" readers what happened/what is happening, instead of *showing* them. When events are described, like you're giving a witness statement, instead of "experienced " alongside the characters.

That said, I'm still really enjoying the story. It's very hot, slow burn or not.

brazilianslavebrazilianslaveover 1 year ago

Thoroughly enjoying this story as it develops !!

oldtwitoldtwitover 1 year ago

Getting to be a good story

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userAntarctica77@Antarctica77
What up. I love to smoke and I love to drink. * My Neighbor Parts are available here(with art and so on): https://www.patreon.com/collection/149345?view=expanded TNT Part 9 is now on it's way. I'm working on setting up a SubScribestar adult page for those who struggle with ...