All Comments on 'Drag Me Away Ch. 02'

Hi. Thanks for sharing this story. While I like it, I hope you don't mind a few things that I point out.

Where there is dialogue, it's good, no dialogue, not so good. Instead of repeating the same words, you could expand the vocabulary. For example, "dragged" was used so many times, it became noticeable. The same with a whole section of sentences starting with "she". You could use more complex/compound sentences and conjunctions.