Drummer Boy - Back Into Hell Ch. 10

Drummer Boy: Bat Out of Hell II: Back to Hell

Final battle time! Hope you got your phoenix downs and health packs slotted! We've got demons, we've got magic, we've got slapstick, and, tonight only, we've got a special appearance from Mark Hamill! So grab the libation of your choice, get comfortable, and enjoy the ride!

(*Mark Hamill not available in some areas.)

* * *

Jason landed on the other side of the portal. More by accident than by plan, he'd executed a pretty decent forward roll. He came to rest on his back, just in time to watch the last blue flames of the portal wisp out of existence.

He stood up and looked around. Having gotten accustomed to the dim light of Electra's Great Hall, it took his eyes a few seconds to acclimate. Gradually, it emerged that he was on a very large and relatively flat rocky expanse. Similar to the landscape around Fist-of-Dark, except that the sky was dazzlingly white, with only pale traces of the pinkish hue he'd come to expect.

Far away, skimming the horizon, was a raised line of what had to be mountains. He was reminded of driving along I-10 in west Texas near Pecos, and seeing the Davis mountain range in the distance. One of the mountains stood out, though. Not only was it quite a bit taller the ones flanking it, but it had a significant addition: a column of white light, extending from its peak all the way up to the heavens.

"Gotta be the Brilliant Antipode," Jason said aloud. "But where are the girls?"

The sound of tumbling rocks startled him, and Jason spun around. A short distance away, crawling along the ground towards him, was one of Electra's Maidens.

Well ... part of her was, anyway. She must have gotten caught in the portal when it closed. As it was, it looked as if someone had drawn a line down her body, from one shoulder down to the opposite hip, and discarded everything below it. What remained was her head, most of her torso, a wing and an arm, and an insane amount determination.

Jason watched as she clutched at the ground with her one arm, trying to pull herself towards him. Then her form flickered, and she turned into the top half of Electra's spear, which then clanked onto the ground. Another flicker, and she was a Maiden again, struggling to reach him.

The Maiden flickered a few more times, alternating between spear and woman. Finally, reverting back into a Maiden, she collapsed face-down into the ground and was still.

Jason giggled. "Gotta watch that first step," he said. "It's a doozy!"

Nah, that was lame, he thought to himself. Let's try again.

"Oh, don't get up," Jason said. "It's no bother at all."

Jason gave that a test giggle, but he wasn't feeling it. What else you got? he thought.

"It's the new Tarterus weight loss plan!" he said. "Half off or your money-"

Jason stopped mid-sentence. "What the fuck is wrong with me?" he said. "This poor brainwashed chick just died in front of me, and I'm crackin' one-liners like a discount Bond villain. Is this what Tarterus does to people, or am I just an asshole?"

The Maiden didn't respond, and since there was no one else around, any answer would have to wait. He needed to find Pearl.

Jason knew that the portal had been looking in on them, so he hoped they were still close. Jason scanned around in the sky until his eyes smarted.

"I better spot 'em soon," Jason said, "or it's gonna be a long walk home..."

Out of the corner of his eye, Jason caught a glint of light, from the direction of the mountain range. A few seconds later, he saw it again, and this time he noticed an unmistakable shimmer of rainbow colors.

"That's gotta be Kristin," Jason said, and immediately started running toward the glint.

Jason had been running for a few minutes before he realized that he wasn't feeling any exertion. He'd already gone the better part of mile, at top speed, and it felt like nothing. And while Jason wasn't exactly a couch potato, since playing drums naturally required a certain level of endurance, he also wasn't the kind of guy who stressed about missing "leg day". He was puzzled by this, until the feeling of air rushing past his horns reminded him that he still had the demon physique thing going on. This new stamina must be a fringe benefit.

Plus, the chill feeling he'd had ever since Granny kissed him hadn't quite gone away. So, even though he was sprinting across an alien desert, naked except for the stupid little leather pack bouncing against his back, Jason found he was in what could almost be called a good mood.

After a couple more minutes, though, he realized he hadn't seen any further sign of Kristin. Thinking that maybe his eyes might have played a trick on him, and praying that he hadn't been trotting around Tarterus like an idiot, he came to a full stop to look more carefully.

Fortunately, he spied Kristin almost immediately. She was

about half a mile away, wings shimmering as she flew along. She was carrying the body of a defeated Spine in her arms.

"Hey!" Jason yelled, overjoyed, and waving his arms to flag her down. "Hey, Kristin! Over here!"

Kristin paused in her flight. Then, releasing the Spine to plummet to the ground, she swooped down toward him.

Jason was still waving at her when her thin, black sword suddenly flashed into view. That was when he remembered his horns.

"Oh shit," Jason said, "she thinks I'm a Spine."

And why wouldn't she? He certainly looked like one, or at least close enough that a battle-crazed Kristin wouldn't care enough to play spot-the-diff.

Kristin landed right in front of Jason, holding her sword out, ready to strike. But instead of instantly carving him up, she paused.

"Kristin ... babe," Jason said carefully, "it's me."

Kristin studied him, and while she did, Jason studied her. Kristin looked much like she had back in the apartment, but with a few differences. She was filthy, for one thing. Patches of soot and unidentifiable grime covered her body. Her blonde hair seemed to have grown a couple of inches, but maybe it was because he wasn't used to seeing it all loose and disheveled like this.

But the biggest change was in her face. Kristin seemed to have aged somewhat. Not like with wrinkles or anything like that, but there was something about her eyes. She had a hard countenance now, like the thousand-yard stare of a grizzled war veteran who's seen way too much.

"Jason," he said warily. "Remember?"

Kristin's blue eyes pierced into his, but she said nothing. Then she breathed deeply through her nose, her nostrils flaring wide, and frowned.

"Yeah, well," Jason said, "you're not exactly Zestfully-clean yourself."

Kristin's eyes flashed briefly, and her sword disappeared with a snik. Then, beating her wings, she rose swiftly into the air.

"Hey, wait!" Jason said. Kristin ignored him, and darted off at full speed.

"C'mon!" Jason yelled, giving chase on foot. "You can't just leave me here!"

But Kristin was quickly gone from sight, leaving Jason chasing after nothing and feeling pretty dumb.

Alone again, Jason stopped. "Great," he said. "Wish I had those wings again, instead of these stupid horns."

He looked around, and instantly regretted it. He was standing in the ruins of ... something. It was hard to say what it had been, since the tan and gray stone walls had all cracked and fallen. There appeared to be foundations for several buildings, some big and some small, but everything had been demolished to the point where it was just unidentifiable rubble. Intermittent craters smoldered in the middle of what had once been some sort of tilled land.

Looking more closely revealed that he was surrounded by pieces of Spines. Lots arms and legs, as well as torsos. And a whole bunch of just ... chunks. Unknowingly, Jason had been stepping on them for a while now. Some of them were still burning, producing a smell that was a nauseating cross between rancid bacon, charred metal, and patchouli.

Jason turned himself around, trying to escape the sight of the carnage, but it was everywhere. He closed his eyes, and put his head in his hands.

"Jesus, Pearl," he said. "This is so fucked up. I know you're trying to do the right thing, but..."

"Give it to me."

Jason looked up, and Pearl was there. She was covered in grime, making her golden skin look tarnished. Her raven curls were in disarray, and singed in places, but other than that, she seemed completely unharmed. And although she didn't have Kristin's battle-weary look, her face was just as expressionless.

And she was beautiful. Jason felt a power, a sort of animal magnetism that was beyond sexual attraction, beyond love, beyond obsession. He wanted to worship her, to devote his whole existence to her. This power radiated from her in waves, making the rest of the world seem less solid, almost artificial. Pearl instantly became the only real thing in the universe for him.

Knowing he was gaping at her, Jason said, "I have something you want."

"Give it to me," Pearl said, her voice emotionless.

They stepped toward each other. Pearl's tail snaked and slithered up Jason's back. Jason placed his hands on Pearl's plentiful, golden hips. Her flesh was soft, warm and inviting in his hands.

Jason pulled Pearl into him. Her gigantic breasts seemed even larger than he remembered, and squashed as they were between them, they ballooned into Jason's face. Unable to help himself, he slurped at one of her erect, dusky nipples. Pearl closed her eyes, and her lips parted as she let Jason satisfy himself with her body.

"Give me what I want," Pearl said with a sigh.

Jason's cock was hammering like crazy, pulsing in the crevice between her legs. Jason knew he would give her whatever she wanted, even if what she wanted was a hard fucking in the middle of all this carnage. Still slavering his mouth all over her breast, he grabbed the other one, palming the areola and squeezing. Pearl yelped in delight, and then again when Jason pinched her nipple.

Then Pearl reached up with her hands, and placed them on Jason's horns. The sensation was incredible. Even though his horns were ... bone, maybe? ... he could feel her touch, her warmth, the pads of her fingers, as clearly as if they were made of skin. She stroked his horns up and down, with deliberate attention, exactly as if she were building him up with a long, slow handjob.

And, jesus was it working. Jason's dick felt like it was as hard as his horns, and pounding furiously between Pearl's legs, desperately seeking entry into her delicious pussy. But she kept her thighs tightly closed, driving him crazy and building up a thunderous desire inside him.

Pearl gripped Jason's horns tightly, as if she were trying to crush them. Jason spasmed in response, and, jerking his hips, thrust his cock into the hottest, wettest, tightest hole he'd ever felt.

Pearl fell on top of him, straddling his chest. Jason had no idea how she was fucking him, but at this point he didn't care. He gripped Pearl's breasts in his hands, while licking and biting at the overflowing flesh like a man possessed. Meanwhile, Pearl jerked his horns, harder and faster, like she was trying to make them cum for her.

"To me..." Pearl breathed, "give it... all... to me..."

As if to emphasize the point, the mouth, oh god it was Kristin's mouth sucking his dick, went extra hard on him, matching Pearl's horn jerking. He could feel the gobs of excess saliva dripping down his nutsack, as the hot sloppy head steamrolled Jason toward an explosive climax.

And he could feel it coming. Not just in his cock, but in his whole body. The power that Granny had transferred to him, that she had somehow stored within his body, he could feel it now, inside him. God there was so much power ... hot and sticky, roiling inside him, yearning to burst out...

When Kristin took Jason's balls in her mouth, jerking his sloppy dick in her hand, Jason fucking lost it. Thrusting his cock into Kristin's grip, and clutching Pearl's breasts in his hands, Jason exploded.

He felt torrents of jism pouring out of him, coaxed by Kristin's mouth around his balls, and her hand gripping his dick. Gobs of jizz rained down on all three of them, hot, gooey rain, plastering onto them in thick sheets. Jason was a cum volcano, erupting an endless supply of seminal lava.

As intense as that was, it was background noise compared to the feeling of releasing Granny's power. It poured out in enormous spurts of energy from Jason's horns. Pearl continued to grip and stroke them, and the energy kept flowing out of him. Draining wasn't quite the right word for this feeling. It was more like unburdening. He'd been carrying this "something" around for so long, and now that it was departing, he felt its absence, and somehow lighter for it.

Pearl herself must have felt it too. She took in the power, and with each burst of energy, her body quaked above him, hands ecstatically clenching Jason's horns as she orgasmed repeatedly.

Both women absorbed the power instantly, no waiting this time. Jason watched Pearl with amazement. She shone and shuddered, the energy radiating from her, making the world around her warp and waver, and Jason bathed in her heat and her pleasure. He felt like he was making love to a star: incomprehensively hot, massive beyond reason, and more bright and beautiful than mere eyes could take in. He would do anything, give everything, to please her. Of course he would, without question.

It was pretty awesome. He passed out for a bit.

"Jason..." Pearl said.

Jason opened his eyes. He was still on his back, with Pearl on top of him, and her black eyes stared into his. He couldn't exactly read her expression, but it seemed to him that there was a sense of recognition, as if she'd only just now figured out who he was.

"Hi," Jason said.

"Love," Pearl said. "Jason."

"I love you too, Pearl," Jason said, and kissed her lips. She kissed him back, and it was heavenly.

"She comes," Kristin said.

"Does she ever," Jason said, before he realized who had spoken. He cast a guilty look upward to find Kristin standing off to his right. She was staring away into the distance, which was fortunate, since Jason didn't know the protocol for praising the sexual prowess of his new girlfriend in front of his very recent ex.

Fortunately, there was an earthquake. The ground rumbled, and rocks and pieces of unfallen wall tumbled around them. Jason and Pearl got to their feet, and looked at what Kristin was staring at.

Off in the distance, an enormous orangey-gray column of dust had appeared. It looked like a dust devil, only much, much bigger. Inside the cloud, intermittent bolts of blue lightning crackled.

"Jason!" Pearl said, concern suddenly in her voice. "Not safe!"

"Tell me about it," Jason said. "Story of my life lately."

"Jason..." Pearl said. "Go far..."

"After all this?" Jason said. "You're not getting rid of me that easy."

The cloud of dust parted, and out of it strode Palladia, looking just as she had at the Great Hall teleconference. What hadn't been apparent then, however, was that she was a giant. And not like Electra either. The Regent of the Spines was hundreds of feet tall, easily rivaling a skyscraper.

Even though Palladia was couple of miles off, Jason could easily make out her features, as well as the giant hammer she carried, and the metal plates hovering around her. The earthquakes, it turned out, coincided with each of her massive footfalls.

"Oh for fuck's sake..." Jason said. "Seriously?!"

"Go!" Pearl said.

"Yup," Jason said. "But first..."

He pulled Pearl in for another kiss. She was stiff at first, but then softened in his arms as she returned the kiss.

Jason broke off, and held her face in his hands, touching noses and foreheads together.

"Now," Jason whispered, "go merc that bitch so we can go home."

For a split second, Pearl seemed almost ready to smile. Then her black eyes hardened, as she got back into fight mode. She launched herself into the air, and an instant later Kristin was at her side. The both of them darted off toward the walking mountain that was Palladia, who continued to make great earthquakey strides across the landscape.

"'Merc that bitch'?" said a gruff voice from behind him. "I knew you were one o' mine."

Jason looked, and saw a Spine, about six inches tall, looking back at him. Her horns were lit up with azure energy.

"Good lord," Jason said. "What the fuck are you supposed to be?"

The tiny Spine smiled. "I guess we haven't been formally introduced," she said. "I'm Palladia."

Jason looked at her closely, and then back at the titan waltzing into battle. She did look like her, minus the equipment, but...

"Sure you are," Jason said dubiously. "If you're Palladia, then what's that? Like a clone, or an illusion...?"

"Illusions wouldn't work now," the tiny woman said. "They got their 'big eyes' on, if you know what I mean. Naw, that's me, too."

"So, what..." Jason said, "there's two of you?"

"Just one. Look, it's not that complicated," Palladia said, and shook her head. "Why are the pretty ones always so dumb?"

"I'm not dumb!" Jason said. "I'm just, like ... out of my depth, here."

"That's fer damn sure," Palladia said. "Just take the compliment, sweetie. You're gonna want someone in your corner. Especially after I wreck your girls, and Ellie turns you into her personal fuckstick."

"That's not gonna happen," Jason said.

"Really?" Palladia said. "Look, here's how it's gonna go down. I feel 'em out for a little while, see what they're bringin' to the party. We dish it out, we take it... good clean fun. Then I bring the hammer down, and scoop up what's left."

"You seem pretty sure of yourself," Jason said.

"Damn right," she said. "I'm goddamn Palladia, Regent of the Spines, Eldest Daughter of the Bright Lady. I am Power! Now," she held her arms up to him, "gimme a boost."

"What?" Jason said.

"Onto your shoulder," Palladia said. Jason eyed her warily, and Palladia sighed.

"Look," Palladia said, "if I'd wanted to kill you, you'da been dead. I'm just sick o' having to yell up at your big dumb face."

Jason shrugged. He extended his hand down to Palladia, and she hopped onto his palm. When he set her on his left shoulder, her weight was so slight he barely noticed.

"That's better," Palladia said, patting his deltoid. "Real comfy."

"So why don't you want to kill me?" Jason said.

"Ha!" Palladia said. "You wanna die?"

"Not really," Jason said, "It's just that everybody else wants me to lately. I just figured..."

"That I'm a big dumb bruiser with nothing but 'smash' on my mind?" Palladia said.

"Well..." Jason said, "Kinda. Yeah."

"You wouldn't be the first," Palladia said. "Just ask the Monopole Herders of Trevaan Quadrant. Oh, you can't, cause I stitched their second-generation quantum field-havin' asses into a pocket universe made of zero-vector bosons. You get me?"

"No, ma'am," Jason said, utterly confused. "I absolutely do not."

Palladia guffawed again. "Yer cute," she said, "but you sure ain't a brawler."

"Um, no," Jason said. "I'm a musician."

"Ugh," Palladia said. "Whaddaya play? Don't tell me... Sackbut? Lyre? Or something wimpy like mizmar or arghul...?"

"I play drums," Jason said.

"Percussion, huh?" Palladia said. "Yeah... we can work with that."

"Whaddaya mean?" Jason said.

"Spines should know how to fight," Palladia said. "If there's anything left after Ellie gets bored with you, I'll make a trade. Get you on my team."

"What makes you think she'll get bored with me?" Jason said.

"Ellie always gets bored, eventually," Palladia said. "And once you're on my side, I'll get you trained up."