All Comments on 'Emily Ch. 01'

by Timewell

Sort by:
  • 3 Comments
DeeFisherDeeFisherover 12 years ago

Not bad, I like your use of language. The paragraphing was easily readable, something a lot of people on here just don't seem to get a good flow to. As a metaphor whore I would have liked a little more by ways of descriptives but in the BDSM category perhaps direct and objective does work better :)

Dee x

Scotsman69Scotsman69over 13 years ago
Excellent

Convincing and very arousing. And well-written 'tongue' apart.

AnonymousAnonymousover 13 years ago
Good build up.

Very good story. Love the build up and the "control". Keep going.

Anonymous
Our Comments Policy is available in the Lit FAQ
Post as:
Anonymous