English Pub Landlady Ep. 05

I had a great time on the Feast Day of Saint Wite but unfortunately so did Harry. I was conflicted. He didn't tell me that he had joined the Wheaters. I couldn't prove it, but I suspected that he had revealed the secret of my issues with coffee. But I felt marvellous.

In the end I decided to hang loose but to carry on keeping his tackle under lock and key. Everything in the pub returned to something approaching normal.

One evening I made my usual entrance into the bar, smiled and looked around. Most of the usual suspects were there. Sitting with Ted was a woman. She was quite a bit younger than him, but slightly older than me, with blonde hair much of which showed the start of turning grey. Her face was sun tanned and had the apple round shape that you often find in these parts.

While it's not unheard of to have a woman in my pub but it was very unusual. It's not something I encourage. When Ted saw me he smiled broadly and gestured for me to join them.

"This is my wife, Volet," said Ted proudly.

"Vi", the woman said in an accent not quite Dorset and not quite Australian as she reached out to shake my hand.

"You got married again, Ted?" I asked.

"No, this is my wife who went to Australia."

I stopped myself saying any of the first ten thoughts that went through my head.

"Ted has spoken about you but I never thought that I'd meet you," I said.

"What brings you back here after all this time?"

"There's no need to be polite, dear. I know what you must think.

"I needed to see Ted and the farm again but mostly I wanted to talk with you, dear."

"Me, I can't think why."

"I wanted to tell you a lot of things that Ted never could or never would.

"I have no right to ask but do you think that we could speak privately?"

I don't know why but I felt like I knew her from somewhere and that I liked her.

"Shall we go upstairs? I'm sure that my husband, Harry, can manage without me for a while."

When we were seated in my lounge, I asked if she would care for a drink. She said that she would take a dry sherry, if I had one. I remember thinking how old fashioned it sounded.

She started to recount her story.

"Although Ted and I have been separated for a long time now we have always kept in touch. I really hope that you don't mind but Ted told me that you and I are the only two women alive who know the secrets of Yew Tree Farm. The deeper secrets, I mean. If I may, I would like to share some of my history."

I was intrigued but I said, "Only if you'd like to."

Violet started her story.

"Whitchurch Canonicorum is where I was born. At birth I was given the name of Candida, which is the latinised name of Saint Wite, but I preferred to be called Violet.

"When I married Ted I took to the way of life at the farm straight away. I'd always been a physical girl, if you know what I mean, and I really enjoyed the ceremonies. It made me feel it was perfectly proper and normal to be had by lots of men. There was never any feeling of guilt. I just felt a connection with all the women who had ridden The Hoss before.

"As the years went by it was obvious that I was never going to have children. If one man didn't get you pregnant that was one thing but if six men were having a go on a regular basis that was another. I didn't mind, it meant that I could just carry on regardless."

I butted in, "Before that, what happened when the farmer's wife got pregnant?"

Vi chuckled and said, "In the book there is a list of Wise Women in the district. They always knew couples who had tried for babies without success. Wives would just appear in disguise. I'm sure that their husbands thought that they were being given some sort of magic potion and, in some ways I guess, they were. Ted's mother told me that the 'Wise Woman' herself would temporarily step in if she didn't have anyone else. Very noble, she thought."

She went on, "Gradually, the farm changed. It wasn't anyone's fault, Ted did all he could to resist. His mother died which didn't help. Farming became more mechanised. Slowly the number of farmhands was reduced and eventually we had to let the last four go.

"I felt as if my world had ended. Ted tried, but I don't believe that one man can approach The Hoss successfully. God knows he did his best every night. I enjoyed it but I was always left feeling disappointed. We both knew that the other one wasn't happy but we tried to keep it to ourselves.

"Then Ted started to scour the local towns and villages at night. Sometimes he would return with one or two men that he had persuaded to fuck his wife. Often he would come home battered and bruised when he had approached the wrong man. I know I sound ungrateful, but it just wasn't regular enough for me.

"One morning things changed. Two Australian backpackers stumbled across the farm. They were hiking around England picking up employment where they could. They wanted to know if Ted had any work for them.

"For ten days they would do tasks around the farm, I would prepare meals for them and, at night, all three of them would strap me to The Hoss.

"They raved about my cooking and my fanny but eventually they talked about moving on. I guess they knew how devastated I was.

"Then one of them had an idea. He said that last year they had been making their way around Oz. They had worked on a cattle station for a while. The guys there had taken it in turn to do the cooking and it was always rank. The bloke that owned the place wanted to get a proper cook in but could never find anyone.

"He thought that both of us could get a job there. Before they left they gave Ted the address.

"For about a week me and Ted talked it over. About what we wanted and what we didn't want, our pasts, our feelings, and everything.

"In the end it was obvious that Ted couldn't leave the farm and that I couldn't stay. He really didn't want to lose me but he knew what was best for me.

"Ted helped me write the letter. I told them about my cookery and my farming experience. I insisted that they knew up front what I was hoping to get from the job so I put down my hobbies as 'Being Fucked'.

"I got the job.

"Ted gave me money for the flights and enough to get home again if it didn't work out plus quite a bit more.

"The parting was awful.

"The journey was so stressful. It took days. Three flights and then a day's trip overland. I couldn't believe the contrast. I knew it wasn't going to be like Dorset but I wasn't prepared for the dryness. How did they ever raise cattle there?

"I was welcomed warmly by the stockmen at the Sundowner. Everyone was so friendly except the owner; he was drunk and unpleasant all of the time. The boys were grateful to have good food and wolfed down everything that I put in front of them. It was mostly beef.

"After three days of full bellies their thoughts turned to other things. I was glad but nervous.

"I couldn't believe there was no ceremony, no structure. Everyone just did what they wanted. The owner went first. He wanted me to lay on a bed. He got on top of me and as he came he pulled his dick out and sprayed all over me. Then someone else did the same, he tried to get my ankles next to his ears. Spunk was going everywhere but the right place. I had a prick in my mouth which ended with cum getting in my hair. Why someone would want to put their John Thomas in my bottom, I really don't know. He decided that was a good place to shoot. I had five men and I hardly shook once and it was the shaking I liked best.

"I stopped them before anyone else could fuck me in another silly way. I sent everyone out of the sleeping house except for the two oldest blokes. I told them that I thought it was disgusting. I told them how we did things back home. One of the men, Bruce, said he had an old stockman's saddle, some harness and lumber. He said he could build something like what I had described if it would make me happier. I said I would like that but only if I could pay him for it. He was OK with it. Part of the price was him having first go.

"It wasn't The Hoss but at least it was civilised. I limited the number each night and once they got used to the idea I think that the boys preferred it.

"After about a week the owner became more difficult, his drunkenness had increased, and he seemed to think he had some sort of rights over what I did in my spare time.

"Bruce, who had built my contraption for me, said that I was silly to carry-on with it. He thought that if we loaded it onto his truck we could go from station to station and make real money.

"He offered to pay me to work for him. I may be a simple country girl but I ain't wooden headed. So we arranged that he would work for me.

"It wasn't until we reached the first cattle station that I realised that the one we'd been working on was very small and badly run. Some stations are huge.

"We soon got a routine going. We would pull into each new station. I would announce what was going to happen then we would auction ten numbered tickets. I would get strapped on while the ticket holders each had a turn in order. Everyone else who wanted to watch had to purchase a ticket for the show. Then we'd move on. Sometimes it would take a day or so to reach the next station.

"After 18 months I had made enough money to go back and buy the Sundowner. By then the owner had slipped so far into his drunkenness that he had no interest in the station. I got it for a good price.

"I put Bruce in charge of the cattle side of things and I concentrated on getting the homestead straight, cooking, and looking after the welfare of my boys. There were only eleven of the stockmen left on the station. The others had just drifted away over the last year or so. My main priority was making sure that no more wanted to leave. I saw to it that they were paid on time and that there was a good hot meal at the end of the day. As an extra incentive I put a brass token into each of the wage packets every week. After supper in the evening I would go out into the mess room and get strapped to the contraption. The boys could choose to redeem their token at any point during the week. That way the fucking got spread out more evenly.

"The fortunes of the Sundowner improved. The workforce was content and didn't feel the need to look elsewhere for work. I was able to put away much of the profit each month as well as investing some back into the business. It was always going to be a small station but that's how I liked it.

"I enjoyed the cooking but I enjoyed taking care of the boys even more. It makes me feel happy to be wanted. I think that my boys are fond of me.

"About a year ago I took on a girl (I say girl, she is 46) to help with the cooking. I explained that she was under no obligation to take a turn on the contraption but I couldn't stop her. It's quite useful because it means that I can do other things; like make this trip."

I had listened to what Vi had had to say but I was still a little puzzled.

"Why did you want to talk to me?" I said.

Vi said, "Me and Ted have kept in touch over the years. I had thought about coming back once or twice but I knew that the old issues would still be there and, to tell the truth, I quite like my new life.

"Ted told me a little about you. How you had developed a bond with The Hoss. It's strange but there seems to be a force that runs through it and through every woman who rides it. Ted said that he had gladly allowed you to study the book. I had been lucky, not only did I get to read the book but I had been instructed about what it really meant by Ted's mother.

"I had a strong desire to feel that same connection with you and for you to feel it with me. I hoped that we could spend some time together while I'm over here and that I could answer any questions that you may have."

I don't know what I thought about Ted telling her so much about me but I had the feeling that as soon as she shook my hand she knew all of my most intimate secrets anyway.

I have never been very fond of women. I suppose that it all stems from my time at the catholic boarding school. Most of the Nuns were really nasty, some were worse. The other girls ranged from bullies to victims. I never felt any rapport with any of them.

Violet was different. I just liked her as if I had known her forever. We agreed that I would visit her at the farm tomorrow.

When we returned to the bar, Ted's face lit up. I sat with them for the rest of the evening. We just chatted but avoided the subject we most wanted to talk about.

Vi and I spoke for most of the next day. About the book. What different things meant or why they did this or that. But mostly we just laughed. Vi had a wicked and girlish sense of humour.

At about 3 o'clock Vi said, "We will need to pack up soon because Ted is taking me out to dinner tonight and I want to leave plenty of time to get ready."

I said, "How romantic it will be just like old times."

She giggled and said, "Yes, he's arranged for two blokes from the Agricultural College to come over later this evening to lend him a hand."

We both laughed.

Then she became a little more serious and said, "You're been so very kind to me dear, but there are few more things I'd like to ask of you, if I may?"

"Anything," I replied.

"Ted is throwing a party for me in a couple of week's time, would you come?"

"I'd love to. I will supply the drink," I said.

"There will be quite a few of his friends there and I am going to be strapped to The Hoss. I'm quite happy to take them all on myself but I would love it if you would join in."

"Fifty, fifty?" I replied.

"Anything else?"

"Could you help me choose some clothes?"

"I'll do better than that, I'll take you up to London for a few days. We can have a girls' shopping spree."

"Oh, would you dear? That would be lovely. I have only ever been to the Airport. There is so much money in the bank and I never get to spend any of it on myself.

"There is one other thing you could do. Would you take that ridiculous thing off your husband's cock and balls? Men don't notice it but I spotted it straight away. You should only push a man so far. Besides, Ted's going to ask Harry to the party and that could make it a little awkward."

We both laughed and I said, "I've been trying to find some reason to release him without making it look like a reward, so that could work out just fine."

Two days later we spent the afternoon looking through my wardrobe. Vi is a very similar size and shape to me so it was an opportunity for her to see what sort of things suited her. Some of my things looked good on her, some didn't. Some things looked absolutely stunning. I lent her a few pieces for the London trip. She said it made her look less like a country girl.

-

I booked a central luxury hotel for three nights. Vi was a little overawed at first but she soon got used to people taking care of her. An early revelation was cocktails. She tried to sample everything on the menu, especially if it had a rude name.

We went from shop to shop. She had no limit on what she was prepared to pay if she liked something. She completely shared my love of exotic underwear.

Violet also shared my desire to be naughty. I thought that I was going to wet myself in Harrods shoe department when she was trying on a pair of Jimmy Choos. To get a better look at them she hitched up her skirt and opened her legs wide which shocked and embarrassed the young man who was fastening the ankle straps for her.

The following day we were having a drink in the hotel's wine bar. Vi was on the cocktails again. I started to get a bit concerned that she had taken a long time in the ladies when she returned with a big grin on her face.

She said, "The drinks are on me. Some City Gent just bent me over in the mens' dunny and tupped me. Then he insisted that I take eighty quid for it. Quite a compliment really!"

I loved Vi, I felt so comfortable in her company. It didn't take long for her to get the hang of shopping. For a country girl she had good taste in clothes. But in underwear, she had really slutty taste. I don't think that she bought a single pair of drawers that had a crotch in them. One pair had a string of real pearls suspended from the back to the front. When she had the knickers on the pearls went up her bum crack and then up her fanny crack. The result was that when she walked the pearls would move gently between her labia and over her clitoris. This sounded like a great idea but she didn't make it out of the hotel. Instead, she was just a quivering mess on the floor of the lift and had to take them off.

We packed a lot into the trip, even managing a visit to the hairdresser and spa.

-

After we got back, I left Ted and Vi alone for a few days. There were places they wanted to revisit from their early life together. She talked of going back to see The Cathedral of the Vale.

When we met again, we spent a pleasant sunny day in the farmhouse garden studying more of the book and making plans for the party. There were going to be eighteen guests including the two of us. We giggled as we discussed who was going to be had by whom. Vi suggested that it may be best to let fate decide. She thought that we could have eight playing cards with my name on them numbered from 1 to 8 and the same for her. The men could draw a card each. That would decide the batting order. Whoever's card was drawn first would have the first innings. That sounded fine to me. Vi made an Australian cricket joke about an 8 ball over, which I didn't really understand.

Almost as an afterthought we had a chat about the food and drink.

In typical Vi fashion, she waited until we had nearly finished to say what was on her mind.

She went on, "Me and Ted have been talking about the book. I'm going back soon and as you know Ted is not allowed to read it. That only leaves you as custodian of its secrets. We know that it's never left the farm before but we both feel the book would be safer if you kept it. Ted says that he thinks you have one of those safety deposit boxes."

I let Vi know that I was honoured to be asked.

-

The evening of the party arrived. Ted had decorated the barn with fairy lights and bunting. Vi had laid on a fine spread of food and I provided a barrel of beer as well as wine and spirits.

Vi looked really smart and elegant in a cocktail dress, with a slightly flared skirt, made of burgundy silk. As she flitted from one guest to another she was the perfect hostess.

I thought, "I wonder what she has on under there."

A little later in the evening, Vi said, "I think it's about time we started the party games."

She went around the room inviting everyone to pick a card. Ted went first and pulled my number 4 card. He did his best not to look disappointed. Soon everybody had selected one. I was quite pleased to be up first.

As I made my way towards The Hoss I passed Harry. Just out of curiosity I asked how he had done. He said he had picked my number 1 card. Then he said that it was OK because he had managed to swap it for one of Vi's. It may have been more gallant if he hadn't told me.

Vi was waiting for me and made great ceremony of unzipping my russet cocktail dress. I let it fall to the ground and she picked it up. There were a lot of raunchy comments about my champagne coloured underwear, which consisted of a boned corset, my favourite half-cup bra and champagne stockings. I would have preferred no drawers but I went for crotchless ones. I didn't want it to look as if I didn't bother. She conducted me to The Hoss like a magician about to saw their assistant in half. Each strap was placed and tightened carefully.

As she flicked the switch on the milker she said, "I love this new machine, the old one was so noisy you couldn't hear yourself coming."

She slipped a finger into my bra and hooked it around my nipple and then flipped it forward. She did the same with the other one.