All Comments on 'Escalating Series of Surprises Ch. 02'

Love the idea of a positive test and a future baby bump!

ATM is really revolting to me so I had to skip parts. I am not complaining but you asked for feedback. Thanks

Seriously, why does it always have to come to incest whenever there is half decent trans lesbian stuff? Really disappointing.

Where to start? Dialogue, internal monologue and romance elements spot on. Narrative flows well and events are described perfectly.

I am fully aware you were writing for over the top shock value. I think any review is going to be highly subjective because of the wide range of fetishes touched upon in the story. Chances are a reader is going to encounter something they hate and I think the score and reviews might suffer for it . For example. I like to think of myself as open minded with an eclectic interest in various fetishes. I am also aware that different things appeal to different people. Even I have to draw the line somewhere. Particularly the ATM but that's just me.

SPOILERS SPOILERS

The really big surprises were kept till near the end and again fall into familiar patterns. For example as soon as the photo appeared, I knew incest was going to be an issue. I have heard of such things happening in real life but usually to half siblings or siblings that have been adopted by different families. The whole set up in the story, is built on a massive house of cards of coincidences and extremely poor memories that requires a very large suspension of disbelief.

On top of that you have the idiot ball getting thrown between the two main characters when it comes to actually talking about stuff, especially birth control. I appreciate they spend most of their time having sex but seriously? They are soulmates and supposed to be intelligent, educated characters. They didn't even know each other's full names. If they had only been dating a week then yeah I could see it as more believable.

Don't get me wrong I know putting together all the complex elements in a story like this is very difficult. There could have been thought put into making the coincidences more likely. This would make the story more believable.

I know I've been quite critical but I did still mostly enjoy it. It is definitely a very strong 4.

That was absolutely incredible! I didn't the surprise coming at all and I loved it. I wait with bated breath for your next stories. Thank you so much!

I honestly thought this one was hot as hell. The title certainly apt! I never expected that shocker, but it really worked well. I know you said this was a two parter, & this is part two, but I'm disappointed there won't be more. I would have loved to have heard where Sabrina went when she went away, as well as the shock on her moms face when she was confronted with all the news. Well written, & easily one of (if not) your best!

Very yummy with many surprises! And well written too! I can't wait to see what happens next! Thank you!

For the reader as well as the girls! I'd have made them half-sisters because 14 years is a hell of a distance between two siblings if there aren't other kids in the mix... but that's just me. Curious as to how they move forward with this, considering the family and newcomer... but that's not a request for another chapter. This is a good ending, well done. Now get a editor / proofreader because nobody can edit their own writing worth a damn.

I really enjoyed the whole story, how the surprises are appearing in crescendo :) It was fun and very well written.

Your writing is excellent — the descriptive language, the natural flow of their conversations, their playfulness... wonderfully done. But the passionate kissing and sex was truly orgasmic to read — thank you!

Beautiful! I love it! But I know nothing about pregnancy tests, so the significance of the line is completely lost on me. Therefore, the end went completely over my head 🙄😂

You are a great writer. I was “all in” from the first page of part 1. Why did you decide to only make it a 2 part story? Would’ve loved to read one more chapter to see how things went.

Anyway, I want to thank you for this story and ask you to keep on writing!!

Thanks,

Willa

Definitely something different for once. Great to see someone using their imagination a bit more than most writers here. The only small fault I found was that it was hard to believe that Sabrina had not known where her mother lived after being back in her hometown for monthes. I gave it 5 stars anyway....very hot...would be a great pair to hook up with for a wild threesome...unlimited possibilities..me being a curious straight man, very, very curious! I enjoy your writing, thanks for your efforts.

I've got to say that was a bit of a twist. But i loved it. Please give us more.

Loved it!

This was incredibly hot and extremely funny! Sabrina and Charli clicked so well together on so many levels. Definitely one of my favorites.

Damn you have to give us at least 1 more chapter ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Would like last chapter to be wedding and just there mom finding out and being double happy for having her first daughter back and also having a grandchild

I love your writing and this is a very cute relationship but incest isn't a fun twist for everyone. I would have liked a tag so i could have avoided this. i know you write a decent amount, i just had kinda assumed this wouldn't have been one of them. The first chapter was amazing and i would have liked this just as well if it didnt include the last bit

Great Story..

Hot story with a trans incest surprise. I loved it! Would love one more chapter.