All Comments on 'Escort'

Nope. Doesn't wash. "Normalization" is another word for compromising one's integrity.

IMO the MC seemed weak to me. He was lied to, cheated on, humiliated and shit on by his whore wife and her whore sister and does very little and then gives her a apartment and then all is good. No real man/woman would do this. Definitely a huge step down from your previous works. 2*

A depressing story to say the least. Who needs to be reminded these days about the human capacity for utter selfishness, arrogance and willfulness, along with the oh-so-clever lies and warped justifications and then the wholesale destruction that surely follows. No thanks. I dropped the story with the "Honey, we have to talk" meeting. You seem to write well, with an evocative plot line, but a little light on character development. Maybe that is inevitable.

That’s y your better of staying single making money and fucking different sluts as often as you can

Best story today, and there are some pretty good stories. Gave it a five.

you have the main character falling into a bottle instead of thinking.

That taints your whole story from then on. From then on you are fighting an uphill battle.

Dionne got way too easy.

It’s horribly disheartening that a once loving faithful wife and mother would / could become a prostitute , whoring herself for whomever , rich or not , and even continue such wanton behavior after seeing and experiencing first hand the high price of her betrayal . In that aspect alone she should not be allowed any contact whatsoever with her former family , she is after all a whore and drug abuser still , and it’s only a matter of time before she has some deranged drug Imbibed wealthy client show up while she’s with her children and molest them and destroy their innocence and happiness while their drunken drug induced mother is passed out naked on the sofa with pills and booze and needles full of heroin sticking out of her arm , while she’s spread eagled on the couch with cum running out of her pussy , mouth and butthole !

All that over the top build up for…..nothing. Spends a shitload to set her up and still He pays for her hotel, pays for an apartment and gives her half. Please….

There seem to be a lot of weak men and women in the world, and even more stupid ones. How both the wife and her sister thought it'd be OK whoring - and I really can't see any difference between a prostitute and an escort - is beyond me. But also, why the fuck did he just let it go?

I actually only made it to the part when he was trying to hire studs in a strip joint, it became just too rediculous. But I'll probably go back when I have more time, and if I can overlook the flippancy of all the idiotic characters.

The writing is good, the plot is interesting, just spoiled somewhat by the characters.

Pathetic

As ye sow, so shall ye reap! A great read with a proportionate measure of justice dispensed. 5 stars plus.

Meh.

Original story was bad.

You surpassed it.

0/5

You normally write good stories. I guess, this was your off day.

Should have burned her

You are one of only a few authors that got that term correct

I'm not a fan of deceit, but she left him no choice after her ultimatum.

I struggle with the sheer improbability.

That is only the 12th time I have given a 5 star rating in over a year on here. I also Followed you, as over 500 people have done in just 9 stories. Just wonderful. I way one word gaff in all 8 pages. Keep up the great work.

8 pages of cuck garbage? Um, I don't think so. By the way, put this shit where it belongs, in fetish.

Long read. Kind story for difficult situation. She considered her feeling/needs arrogantly. Fitting resolution.

He actually took her sloppy seconds and slept with her!! After all his protestations and his righteousness about sex he falls back into bed with her. You totally reversed his character profile in the last two pages. Either he was a total wimp from the outset or you think all us readers are. Inconsistent and obscure writing. This story Having any reference or connection to our Blackrandl does her a huge disservice.

The original story was disastrous, this one Is none the better

The wife is a prostitute. Completely crushing her in every way, putting her in jail for being one keeps her away from impressionable children. What man wants his kids to learn the basic values of a whore? If he loves those kids as he says he does, he's got to protect them from the evil represented by his ex wife. She has to be permanently removed from their lives.

All the planned revenge …and for what ? To go down with a wimper(pun intended)…

Cucky cucky ..

It really did not need 9 loooooong pages ! Two would have done!

So many bad moments in this story. He hates her but does nothing? She does it again because she loves the sex and he then destroys her, but sleeps with her the last week they are together? She knows he hates what she's doing but she does it anyway claiming to love him? So far reality as to be absurd.

No just no. Why would any sane man stay married to a slut/whore? 8 pages of being a pathetic wimp cuckold. And the slut just carried on being a slut/whore and somehow the wimp trusted her with his kids. Even as a fictional story this is unbelievable.

He would be one of the greatest wimps known, being in the game should put both sisters on notice. Hits are so easily delivered and would stop them from showing their daughters how to treat decent husbands so little respect and love.

He certainly WAS a willing cuckold, wasn't he? He allowed her to get him back after the first episode and then put up with her disrespect thereafter for a long time. Even then, he agreed to sleep with her and allowed her to treat him just like one of her "clients". What a sad excuse for a man!

Did not like it, turned my stomic at page 3 and stopped reading. I have been in a similar situation and had to make the life changing decision and told her do not unpack, leave the house keys, get walking and don't come back. Maybe the 2 stars is not fair as it is more about my feelings instead of your skills.

Well written technically with some glitches plot wise. I normally find BTB distasteful but I found myself on the edge of my seat waiting for the axe to fall on this disgusting wife. Five

I liked the story, but felt let down a little by the ending, can’t articulate it yet though

This would have been SO much better if the writer hadn't fallen in love with the story and embellished it with so much unnecessary detail. Just couldn't keep from adding to it, and then adding some more words, and then explaining the words in detail that were just added......

Interesting story line, but unrealistic in all the steps he felt were needed to 'properly end the marriage'.

There was no pain for the whore. -1

I don't agree that having the kids with their mother escort is a healthy environment. What are you really teaching the kids?

As for setting her up in an apartment for a year? No freaking way! Divorce, kick her out, supervised visits with the kids, tell everyone she is a whore, and move on.

What judge gives custody of children to a mother who's primary employment is illegal? I checked out on the story over that.

Escorting is technically legal only in the sense of pretending it isn't about sex but companionship, but no judge is going to pretend that's anything more than fiction. The mother's income isn't steady or reliable, and comes with a larger than normal chance of injury or death, and isn't legal and is a danger to the children.

Nope. Dad just says "We're getting divorced because she's become a prostitute." and when she has income but can't show the source and declares that she's an 'escort' the judge gives custody to the father.

And 8 pages? Sorry, too long when I'd already checked out. I didn't rate the story because I didn't read it.

Great story that kept my interest all the way. But she should have had more pain and his Mom should have never forgiven her. Thanks.

A bit entertaining but so full of improbable situations. Her husband never confronted his wife's identical sister in the manner any husband would given the situation she put their marriage in for an extended period of time. Why would any husband allow his wife to leave their home dressed for sex as an escort, with their children present, and not immediately throw her out. Weak premise of losing the kids. As always it seems in stories like this the husband is weak and unassuming. Even given the way he approached "getting even" with her, it seemed totally our of character. However, fiction is fiction and I am sure this story will affect others in varying degrees. Not one of my favorites but okay and worth a three.

Russell is a very "enlightened" individual, much MUCH more than i would have been under the same circumstances. Instead of paying over 100k to set her up and in the process basically pay her to have great sex, all he woulda had to do was inform on her to the police or drop anonymous tips to the cops that she was transporting drugs. That woulda been enough to discredit her in a court case. Also the fact that she was so hurtful to him but she got to have her cake and eat it too in the end. I would not have been able to stomach it, but to each their own i guess. I do think there is no way that the children would not be effected by her prostitution once they hit their teenage years and saw through the smokescreen. But alas...

simply immature and totally ridiculous.

The emphasis put on his ego and self esteem was a little much. Like what she did wasn’t wrong and the only problem was his ego and pride. Besides that all around good story

Their marriage was over the second Deanne even considered her sister's proposal, much less actually did it.

Two things at the end were really jarring. After being confronted about their divorce, within a matter of minutes Deanne finds her brain that she apparently lost the minute sue arrived in California. All of the sudden it's immediately clear to her how much she hurt her husband and destroyed her marriage. Really?

Even though he was the one who set up Deanne to fuck another guy in their marital bed .. as soon as she agrees to the terms of the divorce Russell agrees to sleep with her in that same bed until she moves out? Again, really???

It wasn't average and I didn't like it, so I rated it a 2. What a waste of time to read it. I couldn't buy the that a wife would one day say I want to be an escort.

Aj judge gives Dionne, who is being divorced because she's started working as a sex escort, primary custody of the kids? Yeah, right. One star.

Nice story. The end is just right. Russ got what he wanted. The marriage was doomed since the first time she worked as an escort. Even though she may have not realized yet the big loss for Deanne was the love of a faithful and good husband and the joys of family life. That Russ tried to keep a friendly and civil relationship with Deanne after their divorce seems logical and of benefit for their children, only I would have never welcomed Dionne in my house. After all she was the one who encouraged Deanne to become an escort and was pivotal in the destruction of Russ marriage. Thanks for the story.

He had money to burn. It all paid off though. Thanks

I am always curious as to why authors are compelled to list characters and other "background" information as a prelude to their stories. Why not just let the readers figure out who's who in the story? It isn't that challenging folks.

I'm probably going to come across like other commenters and bitch about the characters should have done this or that, but it won't be my point. You could have played out the entire back half of her story based on the first visit to California. You had the husband do nothing for weeks while she was an escort out there. Too unrealistic for me to buy it. I also felt you turning off Russell's "anger switch" at the end was also unrealistic. After what she did to him, with no remorse, you had them sleep in the defiled marital bed, then have sex. No guy is that weak... 4*

So he went to all the trouble to avoid alimony and to get primary custody? Wow, what a waste of time and money. After her first month Deanne should have made more than he did, if she did not he should have such a high income that any alimony wouldnt cause a scratch. Also it would have been very likely that he would have gotten primary custody anyway since escorts still count as sex worker. Atleast in my country they are taxed the same way. Sex worker rarely get custody, the father would have to be absolutely unfit to care for the children.

Should had turn both in to the IRS and states for tax invasion. And should have never touched her again.

A ridiculous cuckold story and nothing more. Even in California, no mother gets custody of her children if she is proven to be an escort. So what's the shit? He gets a PI to get the paperwork and she never sees her kids again. If she still wants to work as a whore then at least not to the detriment of the children. Or what does he tell his children why their mother became a whore? 1*!!!

Being rich helped him. Other men are crushed by the system.

He should’ve burnt her. She got off lightly indeed for all all the heartbreak she caused. The sister got off completely.

So no, not a satisfactory story at all.

Scores 3/5

Actually, l just realised the big hole in the tale. Dionne prostituted herself and got the kids. Even in California any worthwhile Attorney worth their salt would’ve got Gary the kids. She was a hooker, he offered more stability in the kids lives than what a hooker could give.

Changed my score to 2/5

Well written. Not sure that I could have parted on such friendly terms.

This is just a story....And a fun read. Thanks for creating and sharing this.

Way too wimpy for me. Ignores her time as a whore while taking care of her sister? Really? A long drawn-out, convoluted process proves she doesn't get the kids? That's hard to believe too, especially because it was so expensive, and if he didn't care about the money, then why not hire PI's to check her out in CA?.

.

Maybe you had something harsher planned out, but BlackRandi talked you into a kinder, gentler approach? Her clique seems to write nothing but cuck stories these days, and she and HDK have whined in the past about how some cheating wives are treated in LW stories.

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Regardless, it was way too wimpy for me: all that talk about wounded pride and ego being the cause of his issues, allowing himself to be cuckolded for months on end, pretending like her first trip to whoredom never happened, treating her like a queen in the divorce, etc. I can see wanting to remain affable with ex-wife to keep kids sane, but this story went way past that.

Decent, but there was a major problem at the end. Why would he allow her to touch him sexually in any way? There was a high chance she could have an STD, even HIV or AIDS. As far as staying on decent terms with her, OK. That could have gone either way, and maybe for his own mental health its better to just live better without her. I do think I would have told her one thing - I would NEVER hold her again, NEVER kiss or caress her, NEVER make love to her again. She should get used to being alone, because no one (ok 1 in million or worse odds) would want a relationship with a whore. Every time she looks at me or the children, to think about what she threw away and to remember that her sister is the one that pushed her into it. Lastly, no way in H-LL would I dance with her at any of the children's marriages. I would hopefully be remarried, and not even a hazmat suit would provide enough protection. Lastly, I wonder what she will do once she gets too old to be an escort? Will she be smart enough to live frugally, and invest the money, and/or get an education? Here's wishing that the sisters get all the Karma that they deserve - something along the lines of a fully loaded 18 wheeler hitting them at maximum speed.

JUST ANOTHER WEAK CUCK HUSBAND AND A WHORE WIFE

The story just dumb and the ending AWFUL. WHY WHY WHY take the cunt whore wife back to begin with ?

The message is CLEAR ... yes I am stupid wimp loser husband and YES you can fuck lots of OTHER men en and eventually I will take you back.

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so thats what the wife did.

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after all that ..after the confrontation He decides to go back and sleep fuck the cunt whore wife?

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why?

He really showed her with that $150,000 he spent!! Not worthy of 8 pages.

@ mikeo0422 - You nailed it brother, my sediments exactly.

Enjoyed the basic premise of this story and how the whole thing was carried out but at the same time, Deanne becomes incomplete as a character when she has second thoughts about being an escort and forces her husband to go along with it. The broken ankle, separation from the family led her into the profession, to begin with, yes, that worked in the world of the story but when she had second thoughts and railroaded her husband and family into this is where she became incomplete as a believable character.

Nowhere leading up to that decision did she come off as a person who didn't think her husband was providing enough for the family or if his relationship with her wasn't enough. It was like you decided that while everything seems good with this family in order to serve this story Deanne had to become something she wasn't. And that idea played through everything you had her do throughout this story, she could have walked from the fake clients when incest was brought up when the husband humiliation was brought up etc. Yes, she believed she was acting but she was doing it with no guilt at all and also at the same time had no idea what would happen if drugs were introduced into the escort situation. Her company and her sister ought to have known that but you needed her to jump through those hoops in order for the story to get to where you wanted it to. I think in the future you need to consider making your villainess' a little more evil, a little more meaningful, and give them a reason to do this. Because wanting excitement isn't something you'd throw your family under the bus for and she had to know if she didn't respect her husband she DID love her kids. It didn't work for me that she didn't try to protect them.

Did you know that Virginia is an at fault state? Adultery can be considered in a diverse case. All he needed to do was get employment records from the agency...

Writing was pretty good. Premise was a little far fetched.

SM Mark

Sorry. This one is just stupid. No man would react that way

Just throw money, lots of money, at the problem.

Thank you for writing and I hope you continue to write more.

bad bad story - nothing wrong being a cuckold if you love the person you want to make her happy and that includes letting her fuck any cock she wants 1on1 or 3way.

OK story. Seemed a little long winded and I found myself really disliking Russ by the end of the story. To me Deanne certainly had some type mental problems to even think being an escort would in anyway acceptable to Russ.

Sure was a lot to wade thru. Too many words. And why would he think that having their Mother being an escort was a "healthy environment" for the kids? She's a whore. You don't think the kids would figure that out? And how did he last that long while Deanne was at home? Just report her to the police and leave her in jail.

I have found that there are at least two ways to look at these Fantasyland stories: as a piece of creative literature with plot, character development, grammar and dialog to consider or as literature with construction of the tale, vocabulary, humor and literary creativity. I don't think it makes a lot of sense to waste time discussing nuances of the plot and analyzing the motivations and behavior of the characters. The characters are creations of the author and if that's the way he/she sees them, so be it. The presentation is much more important because, like it or not, Literotica is primarily an entertainment destination. The sex, to me, is so repetitive and essentially unoriginal, that i often just skip over the sex sequences and proceed to the details of the story and how it is presented. So this story has some unsatisfactory plot components, but the presentation was good and i felt that the characters were consistent and well developed. What I thought of the characters and who they were as people is irrelevant so I gave it a 4* rating. If I wanted to read about people I could both sympathize and empathize with I would stick to the Romance genre or Mature. Why do people who want clean, unmuddied sex in their erotetic readings go to the one spot in the listing that is sure to piss them off?

Great balanced writing. The plot meandered along in a measured, realistic manner. Very believable, with just the merest smidgen of suspension of disbelief required in a couple of spots. 5++/5!!

Started interestingly enough, but went downhill quickly.

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First big plot hole: upon learning that wifey was subbing for her Slut sister as a high priced whole just a couple weeks into her several weeks stay in California, hubby does…NOTHING…to prepare for the return of the whore. Nothing. He had no plan. He greeted her back as if he had JUST LEARNED of her behavior.

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Second plot hole: he accepted the behavior. Very stupid. She was a paid whore…he could have immediately taken her to divorce court and won big. No court would have taken the side of a wife and mother CHOOSING to be a high priced hooker. He would have easily gotten custody of tne kids…a greater share of existing assets, including the house…and maybe even child support from her now highly paid job.

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Thirdly: so after declaring himself by his action to be an idiotic Cuck, he still takes way too long to man up and finally dump the whore. And maintaining a cordial relationship with the whore?

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2 **

Well it was clearly far too stupid for words.

This idiotic jewel shut the door on you thinking your idiocy was worth me continuing to read..Dionne kept on with her campaign. "I know you love Russel to death and wouldn't want to cheat on him, but it really wouldn't be cheating. It IS just sex. Your heart would still belong to Russel. And, he would never know. When you returned home, everything would be as it was between you two before you left."

This total pile of burning garbage is to the extreme BTB crowd as the average cuck story is to the closeted little wimp crowd. Yes, it was THAT freaking bad.

I am confuse.

Is prostitution legal in the U.S.?

If not, why don't Gary and Russ just report their ex-wives their illegal money to IRS?

In that way they get the sole custody of their own kids and teach these whores a lesson in morality. And that will also teach their children the value of self-respect, that money is not everything and that prostitution is not a good vocation. Never was never will be.

Page 1

Why didn't Gary just let her start whoring and then call in the vice squad? She gets busted, he gets a good divorce and the kids. Or do it now dumb ass.

Oh for fuck's sake, hubby texted her and warned her. Just call the PI who will know the cops and get her busted for prostitution. Problem solved....dumb ass.

Page 2

He carried her luggage to the master? WTF???

I hope he's recording the welcome home discussion.

Blah blah blah. Hubby doesn't give a fuck about Gary and his ex.

What does he do about it? He give the recording he made of their discussion to his lawyer and divorces her ass. What? He didn't record it? Then he deserves whatever he gets for being that stupid.

Page 3

Oh fuck! At least make her get tested. No way a guy this successful is this stupid.

Well he got one thing right. He was a fool for keeping her.

And fuck up her whore clothes.

No it doesn't have to be a long term plan. Talk to a PI who knows the vice detective. Get the house wired to record a confession during and argument and get her busted. it's not rocket science.

Page 4

Looks like he's headed in the right direction albeit overly complicated.

Saving him money. 🤣 NOW he's using that big brain.

Gift wrapped horse shit. Love it! 😁

Page 6

He gathered up all the coke...and then it became HIS coke. Dumb ass.

Page 7

Still no STD test?

Took him long enough.

Page 8

Twin escorts. Well sure. 🤣

Wouldn't have done it without Dionne? Maybe. Might want to do a paternity test.

So Jeri is fucking him and doesn't want it to be exclusive. Well hell. Here he goes again.

Impossible to remain bitter? If you say so.

Good writing. Very good writing. Questionable plot decisions...but damn good writing.

Gave it a four. Fun story requiring some suspension of belief.

Not very believable **

No respectable REAL MAN would ever allow her to set foot in his house after she went to California and fucked a dozen men multiple times. He must have been a wimp with cuckold tendencies. He deserved everything that happened to him for allowing her to come home. THEN he actually had sex with her?? Fuck, this was bad. Can’t believe I read the whole damn thing. 1, but wish it could be -10.

way to long

"It occurred to me that, despite everything, she was still a good mother." Totally lost me with that line. Nobody likes a Cuck story but this one was way worse than most.

Absurd situation, although the story still could've worked. But I thought the section of her whoring around went on too long for my liking. His scheme wasn't too crazy, but not that riveting, either. And the fact that he resumed lovey-dovey relations with the wife after she agreed to the divorce is hilarious. The whole wrap-up is treated like she was someone who made an unfortunate mistake, not a married woman who became a prostitute for half a year. The tone-deafness hurts the story; would probably have been better off divorcing her the first time. For the story, I mean. Hard to tell whether putting up with that shit for six months was worth the 'Gotcha!' in the divorce.

As Darth Helmet said; "Go to ludicrous speed!"

Ignoring how ridiculously complicated the plan was, the idea that you could find three good looking retired porn stars that had acting ability shows that the author has never watched much porn.

Male porn stars don't quit until their junk does. A quick scan through pornhub will show you plenty of older, fatter, wrinkly studs. While there are some with decent looks, lots of them look like your accountant or bartender and they were obviously not hired for their looks like their female counterparts. I shouldn't have to explain the acting part.

Huge plot hole is that instead of spending over $120 thousand dollars...plus promised bonuses?

Couldn't he simply have hired a private investigator for about $10 - 20,000? A fraction of the cost?

It would have been easy to document her "prostitution" as an escort from the website. Any judge is going to realize what an advertisement as an escort with an agency really means.

Then a PI follows her over a month or two period of time...obtains hours of video evidence of her leaving her home. Her husband and children. Dresses like a tramp. Meets strange men. For dinner. Dancing. Compromising activities for a married mom.of three.

Hell...it'd be easy to obtain audio evidence...put a microphone in her purse and her car...listen in on every conversation she has with a John as she is negotiating prices and services...listen in as she fucks men for money.

And the licensed PI documents everything. "This is a video of Mrs. Johnson accompanying a Mr. Joe Brown to the local Marriot Hotel. This shows them entering room 407 with a time stamp of 9:13 pm. I waited in an alcove down the hallway until 3:54 am...and you can see in the following photo dated and time stamped Mrs. Johnson exiting room 407 at that time."

"We also have a transcript of the audio file of the time of that liason in the hotel room attached as evidence as well. It has been turned over to the Metropolitan Police Force as part of an ongoing investigation of Mrs. Johnson into prostitution."

It seems like he could have documented her activities as a whore and prostitute for a much lower cost by simply hiring a licensed PI and having her followed without having to hire 3 separate gigolos and paying 6 or 7 times the cost in a more complicated scheme.

Much of the PI's evidence would have been admissible in court.

And frankly other than arranging for proof of drug use...(which would assist greatly in proving her unfit)...none of the rest of his plan would have been necessary.

Keep in mind...she reaped what she sowed. She essentially threatened him...to his face...with the same outcome as her sister and brother-in-law's marriage. That she'd see to it he lost his kids if he didn't go along with her mandate of being allowed to be a whore.

No innocence with this spouse. She got what was coming to her. Rightfully so. A prostitute should not have custody of children.

I'm just saying that he could have done it all for much cheaper and a lot of the evidence obtained by a licensed 3rd party would have been admissible in court.

you and gary are stupid motherfucker , you divorce and move , only say hi and by when come and get the kids. i don't know where you fuck up people live or come from , but here in the states ,no judge in his right mind would give the kids to their mother that was an escort.

and children eventually grow up, and wise up. I wonder who will write the sequel:

Sometime, maybe in her early teens, the oldest daughter will start to decline visits with her mother. She will have discovered that the reason her father divorced her mother is because her mother had become a paid whore. The older daughter will have nothing to do with her aunt when she learns it was her aunt who turned her mother into a slut. Eventually all the kids will learn how their mother destroyed their family, abandoned their father to fuck other men, and that she is still doing it. If they find the transcripts or the videos they will probably declare their former birth mother is dead to them. That's the story someone should write. It would be the final nail in two sister's coffins. I could even see Deanne killing Dionne, then herself, as a final act of regret and contrition. The kids would donate Deanne's estate to help fight sex trafficking Latino children. Thanks for the effort.

I am somewhat amazed at how much thought the author put into developing this complex plot. The story is well crafted and is an enjoyable read. The conclusion the author chose, however is lamentable. The wife is incredibly narcissistic and her choices show she really has little regard or concern for her children or spouse. Nonetheless, in the end she has both her career as a whore and good relationships with the entirety of the family she deserted and betrayed. That is not a universe I wish to visit in my spare time and a story this long is a significant time commitment. I am disappointed in you, BH93.

If prostitution is illegal why don't escorts be judged as the same? Then they could be jailed

I don't understand why you all use randy as an editor, she doesn't know how to cut down on the unnecessary filler, this was a 5 page story at most. Another, BETTER editor for find errors like the below:

"She went on with a rational and justification for her decision"

There IS a difference between rational and rationale. 1*

I wonder where you get this?

The guy is very rich (depending on how much pension you give, or how much he spends on stage shows), and he's not filing for divorce????

Money is more important than his well-being? son self-respect? respect for his children? their well-being?

His brother-in-law continues to see his children, why can't he do the same?

Why doesn't he talk about it with all the grandparents?

Between being into revenge, and giving it your all and making it a doormat like you wrote, there are a multitude of options.

Also, I don't understand why you make him sleep and have sex with her again? or else he should have paid her to show her that he was using her like a whore, which she had become.

Derp.

A good resolution. Though they both could have handled it better in the beginning.

Entirely too convoluted and complicated...boring.

I thought it was a good story. The MC was much nicer than I would have been,, and judging by some of the comments we should see about 50 stories in the next few weeks as these very opinionated commenters write the story as they feel it should have been written.