eXile

We sat down, and I started the count. First bite, I watched as she savored the pena pasta. Mom had never eaten my restaurant cooking. I didn't start working there until after I had moved out. Second bite. Shit, she looked up at me. Don't make eye contact! Don't make eye contact! Third bite! Damn it, I made eye contact! Look away damn you! Look away! She was still holding her fork. I glanced over and watched as it hovered over one of the Italian meatballs.

How sad is this? I'm 22 fucking years old. I've been putting my girlfriend through college, I have a full-time job, my own car, and my own apartment. Admittedly, I'm self-exiled from said apartment while my cheating ex-girlfriend plans her future, but still. I have one. I pay bills. I'm a responsible adult. I can buy alcohol and get the death penalty! And in the span of a few bites of food, my mother has officially reduced me to a 10-year-old who got in trouble at school.

Finally, with the blessings of Holy Jesus above, she took a bite of meatball. Thank you God! I was safe. I had at least another hour or two before I had to have a discussion about last night. "So, what brought you over here, big brother?"

Shit! Admiral Akbar was probably loosing his head about right now.

This was a trap.

I've grown up living a life surrounded by women. Dad use to even the odds, he'd have shot my sister his patented "look" and the conversation would have been over with. But Dad was gone. I was alone, outnumbered, and trying to perform a tactical retreat. "Umm, just got some things going on and I needed a break. What have you been up to?" Dad taught me several tactics to deal with women. Dad tactic #1: redirect.

Sara smiled. "Nothing much. I've got a chess tournament next week, we lost the state cheer leading contest, we only came in fourth place. So I guess I won't be able to put state cheer champion on my resumes."

"Maybe you'll be the chess champ, honey. That's a lot more impressive, anyway," Mom said. "When did you learn to cook so well, Casey?"

Shit. Did she just redirect my redirect back at me. "I spend a lot of time around the restaurant, so I've picked up a lot of stuff from the cooks and bartenders." That was one of the things me and Lisa would argue about. She thought I was working too many hours and not paying enough attention to her. I don't know how else she expected me to be able to pay for her classes.

"The bartenders," she said questioningly.

"Yep, I'm even licensed to bartend now."

"Can you do all the bottle flipping stuff," Sara asked.

"Kind of. I'm not great at it yet, but I've been practicing."

"How?"

"Used bottles filled with water. Then I try not to break them," I smiled, thinking of all the broken glass I've been cleaning up for the last few months.

"Can you show me?"

"Not with my bottles you won't," Mom said.

Thankfully, dinner continued peacefully as we caught up on each others' lives. At least most of it. I made sure to keep away from the last 24 hours of hell that I was currently calling my life. Besides, Sara's life was absolutely terrifying me. How in the hell was she managing to fit all this shit into her schedule? She had recently dumped her latest boyfriend because he didn't have an after-college plan. She was planning a fundraiser for both the cheer squad and the senior graduation trip. Chess practice every morning, cello and cheer in the evenings. And her phone was still vibrating like a forlorn sex toy in the other room, presumably from text messages. Presumably from guys who had heard of said break-up. At least it was in the other room. Mom didn't allow electronics at the dinner table.

Mom's job mostly consisted of telling other people to do shit, and then approving or disapproving of said shit. She had a new advertising push that she had someone working on. She still hadn't started seriously dating yet. Despite our best efforts. Which was a shame. It's kind of embarrassing to say, but Mom was exceptionally hot. So was Sara, but Mom had be sexy for years, it was nice and settled into her. Legs for day, an ass that made even her son take a second look, and tits that made me want to nurse again. Add to that, Mom had a smile for every situation, and an intensity in her eyes that neither of her children had yet learned to match.

She always told me I was the only man she needed in her life after Dad passed. Even though Sara and I had been telling her it was time for her to get out there again. Dad died 8 years ago, heart failure. She would go out on a date or two a year, just to tell us that she was, but they never seemed to work out. On behalf of the male population, it was really devastating. Mom was the whole package. Sexy, smart, confident, funny, supportive. Everything I thought Lisa could have been. Mom just didn't seem to have a need for a man in her life. And the last guy she dated was such a gold digger that he was asking her for a loan on their first date.

If asked, I'll deny it to my dying breath, but, truth be told, I've masturbated many a time to thoughts of my mom. Shamelessly. I've imagined her sucking my cock. Fucking her from the back. Riding my dick, her tits bouncing up and down. I had this really favorite fantasy of Mom telling me how to fuck her, how to eat her out, how fast to move, how hard to thrust. I always felt bad afterwards, but not bad enough not to do it again.

Dad was a lucky man.

Don't get the wrong idea, I don't have an Oedipus complex. I've thought about my sister too. And my family is not rich. Just well off, comfortable even. Mom's salary meant that we had always lived comfortably. Dad was a thing, an event. He moved from one profession to another. A master sergeant in the marines, a carpenter, a blacksmith. He put his hands on things, learned them, and took them into his soul. And then he moved on. I sometimes wonder if he felt like he had to take in as much as he could because he knew he didn't have long. He preached a code of manhood into me. And it had nothing to do with how many push-ups I could do in a minute.

Dad was jack of all trades, but Mom was financial mastermind. She did things with the family funds that let us live life comfortably. Dad's life insurance was put into trust funds for me and my sister. The conditions were simple. Graduate college or turn 30.

Still, I'd met my share of people who knew my mom's salary and tried to hook me up with their daughters, a couple had even tried it with their sons.

It was about 9 when Sara decided to turn in for the night. Mom poured herself a glass of wine then offered me the bottle.

"I prefer whiskey."

"Help yourself," she said.

WHAT! Oh shit! I've never drank in my parent's house. Be cool, be cool. I got up and poured myself a few fingers of whiskey. Just smelling it I knew this wasn't the cheap shit that I had at the apartment. Still, I had spent enough time with the bartenders at work that I wasn't a novice to good liquor. Two ice cubes and a few fingers of whiskey later and I was sitting comfortably on the couch next to my mother as she sipped her wine.

"So," she asked. Her voice sounded questioning. This was a lie. It was not a question, it was a demand.

"Its over," I said.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not really," I said, taking another sip. I was glad for the whiskey, more as a prop, something to do other than look at my mother's eyes. I didn't know what I would see there. Self-satisfaction that she had been right. Pity for whatever she thought I had gone through. Anger that her son had been hurt. Whatever it was she was feeling, I wasn't ready to deal with it. Hell, I wasn't even ready to deal with everything I was feeling.

"You know you can stay as long as you'd like?" Also not a question. I was being told that I was going to stay. There was an unspoken "or else" in there.

"I know, Mom."

3

I woke up the next morning cursing my father's "no locked doors" policy. The only bedroom that locked was my parent's. So I woke up with my arm around a soft, warm body. For a moment, I thought maybe it had all just been a bad dream. It was wonderfully delicious. Just a moment to forget that I had witnessed the woman I loved fucking my best friend. I wanted that. I wanted it all to just be a horrible dream from working too many hours. My cock was hard. My hand was gripping a nice, firm, soft ass cheek.

As I opened my eyes, I saw my sister looking back at me. Of course it wasn't a dream. Life is never that kind. It was Saturday morning. With everything on my mind, I had forgotten about our little ritual. The Saturday Sitdown.

It use to involve cereal and cartoons. It evolved into our own special private time. Sibling to sibling. No judgement. No older or younger. Just us. Connected. Soul to soul. Heart to heart. Love. In one of the purest forms I had ever known.

I closed my eyes and tried to will myself back to sleep, but I could feel her looking at me. I could smell her minty-fresh breath. And she felt so nice under my arm. "You're not gonna let me go back to sleep are you?"

"Nope."

I sighed as I opened my eyes. "So."

"She's been all over my page asking about you. What happened?"

"You sure you want to know. I mean, you two are friends and all. I don't want to come between that," I said.

"I'd rather be on my brother's side."

"How was your week." Dad tactic #1 revisited.

She smiled at me. "No way. Talk."

"We broke up."

Sara didn't say anything. Her smile disappeared and I saw the pity and hurt rise in her eyes. But she didn't say anything. She was waiting on me to continue.

Damn. I sighed again. I felt a pit settle in my stomach as I realized I was about to have to put everything into words. I was going to admit that it had happened. It was real. And, once I said it, there was no taking it back, no going back. I had too much pride for that. I was too hurt. And, deep down, I knew I would never be the same. I could feel it. Lisa hadn't just hurt me. She had mutilated me. The moment the words left my lips, it would close that door forever.

"I caught her cheating on me." I closed my eyes before I could start crying. I hadn't cried yet, and I was not about to start with my sister staring at me. When I finally opened my eyes and dared to look at her, I could see my own pain reflected back at me. Lisa had ruined so much.

I loved that woman. Sara loved her. Mom treated her like her own daughter. Nick was my best friend. And now all that was gone.

Stained.

Tarnished.

Ruined.

"I'm so sorry, Casey." She turned around, keeping my arm wrapped around her. I know my sister. I know her happy signs. I know when she's hiding something. I pulled her tighter to me because I knew she was hurt. Probably almost as much as I was. Her super hero had been caught playing the villain. "Did you know him?"

I sighed again. I was doing a lot of that lately. "It was Nick."

"Damn." A while back, Sara had developed a small crush on Nick. Probably just because he was a good looking guy who was around all the time and always complimented her. He had been a good friend. And now he was dead. To me at least.

We stayed like that for a minute or two before I realized it. My sister faced away from me, snuggled into my body. And, suddenly, in the middle of my early life crisis, I had a deep realization. My little sister wasn't so little anymore. And she had her supple, firm ass was pressed against my raging morning wood. I hated to break up this moment we were having , but... "Um, Sara, I'm getting up now."

"Okay. I'll make some breakfast."

Oh God No! There are so many things Sara can do, but cooking is not one of them. Not at all. "I'm good with some cereal," I said as I closed the bathroom door behind me. Please let her make cereal.

I tried to let the cool water wash away feelings that I refused to admit to, but I was use to having other things to do with my boners. Like Lisa. She never let a hard on go to waste. If Lisa was here, she'd be on her knees, my cock in her mouth, sucking the sleep out of me. Or standing against the wall, her ass waving at me, screaming as I slammed my cock into her. That was one thing about Lisa, sexually uninhibited. She's suck my cock unabashedly, even gagging on it. Lifting it up as she jacked me off, taking my balls into her mouth. Looking me in my eyes. Daring me not to enjoy her. I'd hold back, just barely, but I'd hold back. Lisa took pride in her sexuality. Sex was a challenge to her. Could she give me as much pleasure I could give her.

She'd grab my hand and pull me into the shower. It always amazed me when I got in. The water was warm. I never saw her turn on the water, never heard it, I had no attention to spare. Lisa loved that. She would smile as she wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled me in. I would grab her ass, pull her body against me as our lips melded, blending our bodies and souls underneath the water.

I would reach down, sliding my hand between our bodies, reaching between her legs. I traced my fingers between the lips of her. Finding her, the center of her pleasure, stroking, circling. I could feel her pleasure, hear her moans in our kiss.

Lisa's hands came up and pushed against my chest, pushing me back. She smiled as she turned and looked at me over her shoulder, her glistening, wet ass waving at me.

Mission: Accepted.

I grabbed her by the waist. My cock slipped inside her.

GOD!

The heat. The pressure. The Her.

I started pumping myself into her. Hard. Fast. Pushing both of us. One hand around her waist, another on her tit. Fuck. FUCK. FUCK! Harder. Faster. Take it. Take her. Take me. Yes. More. I love you. I Love you. I LOVE YOU!

I took my hand off my cock.

Lisa wasn't here. She never would be again. My hard on was my own problem now. And stroking myself off to her wasn't going to help. With a tremendous amount of willpower, more than I thought I was capable of, I sentenced myself to blue balls.

As it turned out, it was a decision I would regret. I was washing my face, my hard dick swinging between my legs, when an even worse thought crept into my head. I could always stroke my sister.

Where the fuck did that come from?

Why even ask that? I looked down at my cock. I knew exactly where it came from. I thought about going ahead and finishing what I had started in the shower. But... I didn't want to think about Lisa, and I was about to have to have breakfast with my sister. I wasn't really confident enough to jack off without either of those women popping in my head.

Deep sigh.

Blue balls. Deep blue balls. Closely approaching purple balls. And that was a nice, soft tit grab this morning. And that ass tho-

NO! STOP THAT!

I threw some cold water on my cock as punishment.

That's our sister, cock! We are not an over-hormonal teenager anymore! We do not fantasize about our sister like that. She is a beautiful blossoming woman.

I knew my sister dated. I knew my sister had sex. But it's a horrible thing for a big brother the moment he realizes his sister is sexually attractive. And not just sexy, but my type of sexy. Smart, nice rack, hard body, soft in all the right places... Nope. Stop that. I threw some water on my face. This was not a line of thought I was going to continue. No matter what my cock wanted.

And so it was, I shoved my still hard dick into a pair of boxer-briefs and jeans, please God hide this boner, threw on a t-shirt, and padded my way to the dining room. Into the horror that was my sister's cooking.

Some people are bad cooks.

Sara is one of those people that does everything excellently.

And she loves cooking.

Sadly, she isn't a bad cook. She's horrible.

She is an expert at turning good food into something barely recognizable, and quite possibly poisonous. I mean, they were probably eggs at one point, but... How they hell were they both burned and runny at the same time? The toast was really just the cremated ashes of what once use to be bread. The fact that she had the audacity to put jelly on it was just insulting.

She sat in front of her bowl of cereal with a demure smile. "Yeah, no. Not eating that." I went and opened the pantry. "Where's the cereal?"

"Last bowl," she said as she smiled into her spoon.

"Oh fuck that." I grabbed a spoon out of the drawer and slid her bowl to my chair.

"Hey!"

I slid my plate to her. "You cooked it," I said.

Sara looked at the plate with pure disgust. "How about we go out for breakfast?"

I was just about to sit down and devour her cereal when I looked over at her. The problem with our relationship is that I can bully her, be an overprotective asshole, and claim big brother priorty, but I've never gotten the hang of saying 'No' to her. "Cool by me."

Damn it.

She pushed the plate away with a smile, "I'll go get my purse."

As we walked out the door, Lisa's car pulled up.

Shit.

"Casey, go back inside," Sara said.

Cute. My little sister was trying to protect me. Am I that pathetic now? I gave Sara a push. "We're going to eat. Go to the car."

She had barely put the car in park when door opened. "Casey," Lisa called out as we walked to the car. "I just want to talk."

My morning was not working out well.

Honestly, I'd have happily walked to the car without even acknowledging her existence. And even that acknowledgement hurt. Hell, I had just been jacking my dick to the memory of this woman, a woman that still had a firm possession of me heart, just this morning. A day ago, she could have won a court judgement on my love.

Your family may have supervised visitation every other weekend.

Sadly, Sara was not of the same mind. "Go talk to Nick, bitch." Shock and pain filled Lisa's face as her mini-me turned against her. Did she think I wouldn't tell her? Was I not supposed to? Did that make me the bad guy?

"This has nothing to do with you Sara."

"You broke my brother's heart. That has everything to do with me. Now fuck off."

"Sara," I called, "Let's go."

"Casey, please! I just want to talk!"

I closed my door and started the car.

"Go suck a dick, bitch! Nick's place is just a few blocks down!" Sara, thank God, got into the car and closed the door.

"CASEY!"

For the second time, I drove away with the love of my life in my rear view mirror screaming my name. At least this time she was dressed though. The hard part was the realization that she was still the love of my life. I mean, how pathetic was that.

I remembered moving into our crappy apartment. I remember seeing our future in her eyes. The hope. The joy. I remember laughing as we cooked together. I remember sitting on the couch, wrapping our bodies around each other. And it wasn't about sex. It was just comfort. Her legs twisted in mine. My arms around her. Her hair right beneath my nose. The smell of strawberry and life. I remembered coming home to the smell of fresh paint and seeing her smile, looking at it, watching it dry. I remembered doing bottle flips as I made us drinks. Lisa would clap and smile and laugh. God, we were happy.

And I hated her.

I saw her with my bestfriend's dick inside her.

But I still fucking loved her. Some small part of me wanted to put the car in reverse, throw this bitch in park, and run back to her. I could tell her I still loved her. Listen to her promises. Let her tell me we could survive this.

"Don't you fucking dare," Sara said. She was angrily staring out at the road.

Wow, mind reader much.

4

Sara

I was incredibly pissed. Not at Lisa cheating on my brother, I had seen that coming from a mile away. I had been expecting this for a while now. I even called the two of them dating! No, what pissed me off was her fucking up my day. Like, how desparate could you be. You fucked your man's best friend. Casey even caught you in the middle of fucking said best friend. You have to know your time is done.