Fake Boyfriend Real Dom Ch. 01

"You know the Sanders' have a lovely son about your age." Therese said.

Tiffany glanced up from her laptop at her mother, a knot of dread forming in her gut. "What?" Here we go again.

"You know, Julian. Julian Sanders? You could bring him to Samantha's wedding."

"No, I don't think so." Flashes of that one college party they'd both gone to went through Tiffany's head. Beer kegs, weed stank and pervy comments at her friend. Definitely not.

"Samantha suggested it. You know we're just worried about you."

"Mom, please."

"Because she's getting married and she's only twenty two and you're already twenty six and that clock's ticking, you know." Therese set down her coffee mug onto the dining table and sat down, scooting her chair so she was inches away from Tiffany. "And I want grandkids one day. Is that too much to ask?"

Tiffany rolled her eyes and turned back to her laptop. She was only home for a weekend, but already she was despairing at the hours and hours of nagging that were to come.

"It's because you're working all the time." Therese gently folded the laptop closed. "You'll never find a man if you're so focused on work. There's other things to life besides spreadsheets and presentations and I just want what's best for you, honey-"

"Mom!" Tiffany always had to yell to get her mother to stop. "I have a boyfriend!"

A huge smile came over Therese's face. "Well why didn't you just say so? What's his name? What's his job? Are his parents-"

"I actually have to go like right now." Tiffany stood up and shoved her laptop into its case. "To, uh, meet my boyfriend." She grabbed her coat from the back of her chair and bolted to the door.

"That's great, sweetie! You should bring him around for dinner!" The door slammed shut before Therese could finish her sentence.

***

That was truly the dumbest thing she'd ever done. Tiffany leaned her forehead against the window of a trendy coffee shop, decked out in wreaths and twinkling Christmas lights, signaling the post-Thanksgiving season. Her boots crunched in the snow as her breath fogged up the window. She bit her lip, thinking through the possible avenues of action she could take.

She'd called up three different rent-a-boyfriend services, and all three had been booked up due to the time of year. How was she ever going to find a fake boyfriend before Sunday? She kicked at the packed-down snow and shivered.

"Tiff?"

She looked up at the familiar voice.

"Tiffany Page! It is you!" A man about her age stood next to her, his hands stuffed into his coat pockets to hide them from the cold.

"Joseph?" She wrapped an arm around him as he spread his arms for a hug. "It's been what, six years? You look good!"

She looked him over, starting from the bright yellow pom pom that adorned his tuque. His messy black hair fell to his eyes, which were cool gray behind his thick-rimmed glasses. His smile showed a row of white teeth with a chip in one of his incisors. He stood at six feet tall, teenage lankiness turned into lean muscle that was hinted at under his wool coat and confident stance.

"What have you been up to? You work in like advertising now, right?"

Tiffany nodded. "Just work and more work. What are you doing these days?"

"Believe it or not, I do SFX makeup for TV. You in town to visit your parents?"

"I'm here to go to my cousin's wedding."

"Which one? Danielle?"

"Samantha."

"Already? Great for her!"

Tiffany looked him over once again, biting her lip as her gears turned. With his high cheekbones and strong jawline, he'd turned into a decently handsome man. "Hey, are you still single?"

Joseph nodded. "Never could hold onto a relationship."

"Wanna grab a coffee real quick?"

* * *

Tiffany sat with both hands around a steaming mug that smelled deliciously of caramel and cinnamon. She eyed Joseph, who was stirring three sugar packets into black coffee. When she squinted, she could make out the skinny, awkward kid who'd been her best friend in high school. His posture had gotten much better and his high school fidgeting had transformed into restless energy.

A wave of nostalgia and wistfulness rose up in her, and she regretted not reaching out after they'd turned about twenty. They'd gone to different schools, she to some fancy liberal arts college out of state, and he to the city's public university. She'd been too focused on being the best in her class and being successful that her social life had gone out the window. But seeing him again now, it was like she was in high school all over again, chatting easily about work and her plants, and even their inside jokes were still funny. But she had business to attend to.

"So, about my cousin's wedding."

"Yeah?"

Tiffany took a deep breath. Suddenly the awkwardness of six years out of contact made her fingers shake. "I lied to my mom that I have a boyfriend. And I need someone to bring to Sam's wedding."

Joseph's eyes widened, and he leaned back a bit in his chair. "I bet Therese has already called up your whole family with the news."

"Oh, god, yeah." Tiffany slumped in her seat. "The wedding's on Sunday and so... Would you please pretend to be my boyfriend for the weekend?" She clapped her hands together and held them in front of her face. "Please?"

Joseph scratched his chin and looked out the window at the bustling city street. "I don't know, Tiff."

"I'll pay you!" She blurted. "Please! I need this!"

He pursed his lips, making an exaggeratedly thoughtful face. "Tell you what. I'll do it for free."

"Thank you Joseph-"

"But." Joseph held up a finger. "You have to do whatever I tell you to for the weekend."

She paused, thinking of the implications. But she was desperate, and she was sure he wouldn't make her do anything illegal. "Deal." She held out a hand and they shook on it. "So do you wanna meet my parents?"

* * *

"Well I never would have believed it!" Therese clasped her hands together. "It's been too long, sweetheart!" She crushed Joseph in a big hug, practically lifting him off the ground.

"Hello, Therese." Joseph peeled himself away.

"Oh! I made some cookies! Please have some!" Therese ran to the kitchen and came back with a plate laden with cookies. Joseph took one as Tiffany looked on in exasperation.

"Okay, great you met him. You can go now, Joseph." Tiffany tried to push him towards the door.

"No, no! Please, stay for dinner!" Therese's hand gripped his arm like a vice. "We're having pot roast!"

"I'd love to, Therese." Joseph raised a brow at Tiffany and followed Therese into the kitchen.

Left with no options, Tiffany followed after them.

"Is there anything I can help with?" Joseph asked.

"Of course not, dear, you're a guest. Tiffany, why don't you set the table?"

"I can do it." Joseph took the cutlery from Tiffany's hands and whisked away to the dining room with a wink.

"What a nice boy." Therese pulled the pot roast from the oven and placed it onto the counter. "Why didn't you tell me about this earlier?"

"Does it matter, Mom?"

Therese shrugged. "As long as you're dating someone. You know, I've been worried for weeks you wouldn't have a plus one for Sammy's wedding, but I guess it all worked out in the end." She beamed at her daughter as she placed a bowl of green beans into her hands. "Set this on the table, dear?"

Dinner consisted of Therese's special pot roast, buttery baked potatoes and garlic green beans. Tiffany sat awkwardly next to Joseph, stirring around the green beans on her plate and trying not to make eye contact with her mother. Joseph, on the other hand, chattered happily with Tiffany's parents and little sister. Tiffany eyed her father, Edward, who sat at the head of the table. From the tilt of his head and the occasional grunt, she saw no sign of suspicion or disapproval. Her sister Maggie sat next to Therese, inhaling her green beans and roasted beef.

"I still can't believe Tiff got a boyfriend," Maggie declared. "Are you like fake dating or something?"

Tiffany froze, her gaze sliding over to Joseph, who laughed.

"Nope. Sorry, kid." He leaned over and kissed Tiffany on the mouth. Tiffany kept herself from pulling back and tried to kiss him back. Just as she was beginning to enjoy it, he pulled away.

"Gross!" Maggie made a face, but went back to her green beans.

"Try not to eat too much, Tiffany. You want to fit into your dress on Sunday." Therese said brightly.

"Okay, Mom." Tiffany sighed, but was grateful for the change of subject.

The rest of the dinner was uneventful. Tiffany managed to get down some food and decided to mark down the dinner as a success.

"Dessert, sweetheart?" Therese asked Joseph. "I've got some killer apple pie in the fridge."

"Thank you, but I really should get going." Joseph stood up. "Thank you for a delicious dinner."

"You're welcome any time, dear!"

"I'll walk him out!" Tiffany stood quickly and practically dragged Joseph to the door.

"Seems like your parents like me just fine." Joseph flashed her a smile as he put on his shoes. He took a slip of paper from his pocket and held it out to her. "By the way, your first task of the weekend is to call me. Around 9?"

Tiffany nodded. That was simple enough. And with that, she shoved him out the door. She closed it and leaned back against it, deflating.

"Tiffany? Aren't you having some pie?"

"Coming, Mom!" Dinner had gone well enough, and her family didn't appear to suspect a thing. She felt assured that she could keep this up until Sunday.

* * *

At precisely 9pm, Tiffany called Joseph as ordered. She half expected his mother to pick up, as in their teenage days when each household had one phone. But it was Joseph who picked up.

"Hello?"

"9 o'clock. As ordered," Tiffany said.

"Punctual as always." Joseph laughed. "Okay. Now call me Sir."

"What?" She must have misheard. "Are you serious?"

"One hundred percent. Does it make you too uncomfortable?"

Tiffany pondered for a moment. They did have a deal. "No... Sir." She heard a laugh through the phone.

"Good. I want you to call me Sir whenever we're alone together."

"Are we gonna be alone together a lot? Sir." She'd thought it sounded easy, but it was difficult to say naturally. She flopped down onto her childhood bed. It felt tiny compared to her queen bed at home and was still covered in the bright pink, unicorn-themed sheets from when she lived here.

"I sure hope so. I ain't gonna let you skip out on your end of the deal. Unless it's too hard for you?"

Indignation coursed through her. She'd never been less than competent at anything. "No way. Sir."

"Glad to hear it. The wedding's on Sunday? When are you heading back?"

"Yeah, ceremony's at 4. Sir. I'm heading back Monday morning. Sir."

"Great; gives us about two days to work with." He rummaged through something noisily. "Come by my place at 10am tomorrow. I'll text you my address."

"Will do... Sir."

"We'll work on that. G'night babe."

"Night. Sir."

Tiffany hung up and threw her phone onto the bed. She could see a plane going by through the window. What did Joseph have in store for her tomorrow? She didn't exactly feel scared, but she did feel a vague sense of apprehension. But she doubted he'd make her do anything crazy weird. And in any case, she needed a plus one at the wedding or she'd never hear the end of it.

She burrowed underneath the covers and turned off the unicorn-shaped lamp on her bedside table. She just needed to last until Sunday, and everything would turn out fine. Reassured, she slowly drifted off to sleep.