All Comments on 'Falling'

Usually not my genre, but sometimes an accidental exploration finds a gem. I felt as if I was there with you. I hope I didn't intrude.

Loved it. Sensual sexiness... my favourite. Look forward to more stories.

Mmmmm…. More please

This was absolutely beautiful.

While I found the descriptions sexy, they quickly become one dimensional and lack momentum. This may be because it isn'T really a story, but more a letter between you and your lover. That is cool, but we as readers lack enough to feel the same as you for your lover. I think the idea could still work, but it quires more situation and context to come to life. Only then, could we as readers feel the same erotic energy that you feel....if this is the intention...

Nice story. What about a follow up with some toys as an adventure.

Thanks for the comments! Yes, it is more of a letter than a story and I suppose it's really only meant for her. But as I can't give this to her, I've shared it here instead as some kind of self- therapy :-). I'm married to a guy, she is my friend and 'Falling', although full of my real thoughts and feelings, is just one of many fantasies. Totally understand that it doesn't match the narrative form of the majority of submissions and so isn't for everyone though. I do have a couple of sequels in mind, one of which does involve toys. Hope to get writing soon... Thanks again x

I have no idea what the anonymous commenter was talking about, and I absolutely do not want them speaking for me. I thought this story was beautiful and I could totally relate to and feel the emotions of the moment. I think your writing is excellent and I love that it’s written differently from the way stories normally are. Maybe some people have poor imaginations or limited experiences with intimacy and desire. Thank you for sharing this with us!

@lexstroker Thanks so much for your lovely, specific comment - very much appreciated :-). I've edited 'Falling' since it was originally posted as I did feel the beginning and ending in particular lacked detail - so hopefully the newer version you read addressed some of the previous issues the anonymous commenter was referring to. It was hard not to take the criticism too personally tbh as so much of 'Falling' is not fiction. But it did inspire me to amend some sections - and I feel it now better reflects my thoughts and feelings - so it's all good :-). Thanks again for taking the time to comment x

Excellent story. Love the detail, love the format, love the pacing. Wouldn't change a thing.

Absolutely beautiful. You write with so much feelings of love and desire here, and it comes through unambiguously. Unconditional unrequited or forbidden love is perhaps the most painful but we can learn so much more about ourselves by experiencing it. Magic, 5 stars.

I found this from your post on the Story Feedback forum and thoroughly enjoyed it. On the one hand, the style does add some distance between the characters — but it is quite clear that this is either just unspoken thoughts or perhaps a letter written that may or may not ever be shared. All in all, I really enjoyed it and can see a path for more.

Thank you - I really appreciate the feedback :-)

That was so erotic, unlike most of the verbal porn on this site. I have my fingers crossed for you that your wishes and dreams of your friend become true.

Please write some more delicious stories like this one.

M

@P I'm not sure if you'll ever see this comment but I just wanted to says thanks for your lovely message and feedback on 'Falling' via email. I don't have an email address to respond to you on which doesn't give my personal info so I hope you'll understand if I answer your questions here: I haven't done any creative writing since I was 16 years old (24 years ago); I've written letters to people but nothing which is fictional in this way. I guess I just haven't been inspired to until I met the woman I'm writing about in this story. However, I didn't initially set out to write something to publish here; it was just a way to process my feelings. When I fantasise, I think in words almost as much as pictures and so my feelings for her just came out in this way. I was probably thinking in some of these exact words for a few months and then initially wrote 'Falling' in short bursts over about four days. If you ever see this, you'll see I've answered your other questions in my comments below. Thanks so much again for your message - it really meant a lot to me that you connected with 'Falling' and your comments made me feel like my feelings were being understood :-)

Great start to a story

Twice now, and strong.

Two killer lines among many"

"... suddenly I'm coming, coming and jolting against you ... laying myself bare."

"... the walls of your vagina - dark, fleshy, exquisite - contracting around me ..."

Part 2 tomorrow. I like anticipation.

XOXO - Gill.

My partner read it with similar outcome to mine. Plus I was with her!!

- G.