All Comments on 'Family Guy Redux'

An exercise in toxic stupidity expressed through rancid cliches. 1

She was way ahead of him the whole way.

LOLL!! The original anti-BTB LW story! Well done.

Ugly and stupid.

Kathy became Kate and Mark became Mike? Don't you re-read your own story before posting? If he had told her about getting the pictures up front they may have had a chance together but he is the one who fucked it all up. She lived all those years not knowing why he pulled away until she didn't care any longer. Still a solid *4*

??????

lolll ring-a-ding-ding

Wow chilley!…..hope u still have ur willey??? That was such a. Disgusting write up…..u seem like someone stamped in ur willey…

There is a lot of confusion by distraction in this sad tale. To point out the husband is "rigid in his thinking" in no way excuses the wife's adulterous behavior, especially when her disrespectful actions resulted in her husband not being the biological father of her younger son. Because of her longstanding pattern of betrayal he, the MC does not owe her civility or an equal share of their marital assets when he files for divorce. His father's sexual orientation is not pertinent to the issues between the MC and his slut wife. The man who the slut plans to be with after leaving the MC has disrespected him, his marriage and the children raised in that marriage. The lothario is due some severe consequences, and it is an embarrassment that the MC makes no attempt to hold him accountable for his actions.

Don't understand how anyone can think this is a good story.

Very depressing for Mark. I shouldn’t have read this story, it only added to mine. I’m old school too and about ready to throw in the towel. At least my ex is happy. I see no future.

It took some guts to write this for this crowd. For that alone I gave you five stars.

I always cringe when they say they will stay in a dead marriage for the kids. But what usually happens is that the parents make there kids lives a living nightmare, because they can’t stand to be around each other and that toxicity pervades the household. So these kids spend years growing up in a shitty home and internalize these negative behaviors as what they think family life is and not what it could really be.

Do you think any of the six of them actually "won"?, His mom, dad, Eric, Amanda, him, Kathy? Some are "getting by", most have more regrets than happiness, even the kids. Sex is a wonderful thing, so is a gourmet meal, or a well played concert, but, no one of those things results in happiness, just momentary contentment.

Read again, made the MC into a bitter cuck, what a load of BS you turned this already bad story into.

1/5

And now MC is bitter and trolls the "comments" boards on LW!

.

This story makes so many great points about communication, honesty and 'death by intransigence'. GREAT story full of real-life advice and true-life interactions. 5/5!!!

More pathetic drek for the cucky boys to masturbate to. Author should turn in his man card..

You took a good story and turned

into shit

You took a decent story and turned it into a POS. You said she "won". How did she not win in the other story. She got to live with him supporting her for 19 years and he raised her bastard kid. Then he let her go to find more guys to fuck. It wasn't like he burned her to the ground like he should have done 10 years before...

You should have just had him grow a vagina in your story. All he does is cry and feel sick.

I am only mad because I didn't stop reading after the first few "original" paragraphs so my fault...

Hate it when cheats win.He should have divorced her for adultery and gone after half her business.Also he needs to remove himself from his sons and so called brother.

Hopefuly,next time Kathy wants some thing doing,he will tell her where to stick it.

Actually I kinda liked it. I went into it with low expectations but was pleasantly surprised. To me it was just a re-telling of the story with tongue firmly planted in cheek, but judging by the comments it seems most readers didn’t see it that way. Oh well, you can’t please everybody, I suppose. I laughed out loud, though, when she told him his dad was gay. Mister ‘Be a Man’ and his pious platitudes. Yeah. put a smile on my face alright. Thanks, chilley.

I guess that often in real life the good guy loses but it still sucks. I realize some places still have divorce laws that draconian but man, this guy just wasted his life, now he is 50. Wish I would not have read this in the am as it put me in a bad mood to start the day! Hope something bad happens to Amanda, the whore!

Part two huh? Part one must be very bad. I didn't find any redeeming factors in any of the characters here. A homo dad, a man who wants to be married but is rigid in his thoughts about marriage. And a friend who truly uses him for her own good. If I were him, I would walk away to some small town and just never let anybody know where I am at. Family is truly bad.

to transform the wife from a good person who made a horrible mistake to an unrepentant slut who literally fucked over (18 yrs * 12 months * twice a month) 432 men rather than have a conversation with her husband about their sex lives?

Seriously who finds fucking 400 men easier than talking?

Was there a point in there somewhere? Matt Moreauvian treatment of the MC, just a small, weak minded man whose life gets ruined by the women in it.

Why is Ron Willard still walking ?

Just a pile of bleccchh!

I'll give it a 3 for the technicals of the writing and at least not a willing cuck tale, but ....

You fucked that up. Whatever was going on in your head to think this was a good idea?

brought out the cuckerati here. The story is neither realistic or an improvement on cpete's. It's just an extended misandrist, cliched harangue in the service of trying to sell warmed over Oprah/feminist slop about "relationships". Now that the weak/defective/low T males have gotten their validation, they can go back to reading stories about husbands sucking the cocks of their wives' bulls

life should be EZer for all, not perfect but definitely more calm. TK U MLJ LV NV

Your perception that marriage could have worked was completely wrong. It was doomed from the start. They were from different worlds. She was arts. He was outdoorsy. She wanted to be a slut. He wanted a good wife.

Interestingly the Karen character read the situation correctly. She also knew she wasn't woman for Mark. She liked the hoity-toity life.

In the end, Amanda won out making her sons just like her preferring tanglewood rather than sports. I imagine they will also like lots of weenie. Maybe they can share boyfriends. At least Mark won't have to worry about waiting for grandchildren.

Hopefully, Mark's new lady friend won't be a total skank like Amanda.

This is great! It brings out such double standard whining.

The story was good and more realistic than the classic save-my-pride-at-all-costs-by-the-numbers saint vs slut LW story.

Thanks to the author. It took courage to post the story.

I am glad I found this in someone's Favorites.

A story that, after 6+ years is still stirring up plenty of comments -- even Recent Comments.

My problem with the cpete original was a wife being joyfully content for so many years in a marriage to a man who is emotionally removed and aloof.

Also, since the wife proved herself to be a loving, good -- and faithful -- wife and mother for so long (nearly two decades?) after her her initial infidelity (as she was in cpete's story), I was disappointed at the marriage terminating.

A common Literotica Loving Wives theme is for an unsuspecting, saint (ie totally undeserving) husband to be blindsided by flagrant cheating by his wife. See Just Plain Bob (an important, prolific Literotica writer) for a great sampling. Those have their place in Literotica. But chilleywilley has provided us a variation that one commenter dubbed more complicated and believable.

Because of all the above, i gave this 5 stars.

As to the comments, I agree most with BTTapp and Lickideesplit.

Since the characters in this Redux are so unlike those in cpete's, maybe chiilewilley's preface would have been more palatable to commenters, if it had been something like, "when I read cpete's Family Guy, it inspired me to write my own story, that starts the same, but goes in a different direction with different characters," and then not used the same names. I'm afraid there would still have been a flood of complaints that the wife was slutty and the husband wimpy.

My preference (especially as a redux) would be the wife as faithful as in cpete's version, but simultaneously planning to divorce her "cold fish" husband, after both holding the marriage together up to that point for the sake of the children.

But, because this story was well written, and departed from a too-common LW theme, and was able to evoke such a storm of comments and reflection, I think it merits 5 stars.

Paul in Oklahoma

Cpete's story was great, so why crap all over it. Just write your own fresh story about a pitiful guy called Mark.

Cause I can't give u a ZERO.....bill

What a bad way to treat a good story. This was a mistake.

Chilley writes a good story, but I prefer cpete's version better. This just wasn't an improvement.

Adding to or altering an ending is fine if the characters remain consistent with the original story.

WTF, you have created new characters out whole cloth. Try not to blemish, anymore.

I thought cpete’s story stood well enough on it’s own. I can’t imagine a single reason why someone would feel the need to “improve” it. And judging by the scoring on this “redux”, I don’t feel alone in that opinion. BTW, if the new “censorship powers-that-be” have a problem with my opinion, go ahead and dump it. Who cares? Even though I will say, my opinion can’t be any worse than the story I just commented on. Have a nice day.

I liked cpete's original version a bit better.

... but it “feels” so much more realistic than cpets’s original. You changed just a little (ok some not so little ) thing here and there, and the story took the other fork in the road. From, "Yeah! "BTB Baby! Woo-hoo!!!"" fantasy (and I likes me a good fairy tale , usually) , to a more sobering and realistic feeling... Well, it's a let down. Can't stress how much more real life this one feels. As much as I hate the story (Hey, "The Red Badge of Courage" is no feel good tale, ok. Not that I'm equating the two. Just the analogy that a story can be depressing as hell, and still be considered good)), I've got to give it 4.5-stars.

kids are resilient and fair better after divorces than living in dysfunctional households. So they weren't compatible anymore. OK move on. Don't cheat and think your making due.

Well she married the idiot. If she had been with a normal man the only thing that would have beat her belonging and son to the curb would have been her ass.

I only read the last page or so... It seems like a public service announcement. Some people really do need to let go a bit. I guess I didn't see the nasty bitch part, which is fine, I've had my fill. Maybe there's a certain irony in the rigid and vehement reactions from the comments. From what I see, it's about a person who was born with some A neurons in the B spot, and vice versa. Comments would suggest the female character is needlessly over the top. I don't know, I didn't read far enough. It doesn't seem like a wimp story from what I've read, either. Writing about handicapped people was legal last I checked.

I've maintained and still do that the author forewards are detrimental to the appreciation of the story 96% of the time, and the author has done him or herself a disservice this time, too. Based on the level of impairment of the male actor here, it should have been billed as "too smart to die, too dumb to live" story instead of "now, smart psychobitch gets to win," or "wife gets a brain upgrade." Then again, that would be according to my rigid delusions that authors generally write for one or more of: money, their enjoyment, the pleasure of seeing others enjoy it, and not to generally piss people off. This story could probably have gone with a suicide ending if the dumb guy was portrayed just as dumb but in a smarter way. Like diagnosed as autistic and with personality disorders.

I've also maintained that authors commenting on their own story is almost always the wrong thing to do, but thankfully the author didn't bother to get personal. Maybe she or he did, I don't remember it anyhow. I just remember it helped my understanding of the story and comments, and I infer from that.....it surprised the fuck out of me.

Dont read this anyone.

Wife is a cunt through and through.

This was just stupid.

cases to the yard

of Matt Monroe and English Bob because your more of a fag than any writer in the history of literotica

Wow that was stupid a piece of trash.

Damn, how low can you go? I’m not talking about this story, I’m talking about someone who would take a perfectly good story (cpete’s) and bastardize and butcher it. How depressing.

usual shit from another WIMPY FAG "author".

shit

You will never get Legends invite

Cpete's story

This story is well written and well put up.

The morals are shit, though.

The wife is a victim in the beginning,

but instead of trying to mend the marrage,

she runs away from it.

That changes her from victim to crook.

And I don't like crooks.

In respect to well written story, I choose

not to to rate it.

What a pathetic loser that guy is. Good story

unless you've always been a woman with issues??

Why on Earth did you write a piece of shit like this ruining an otherwise fine story? Are you a wimp cuck who can't stand a true mal and you have to pussify other wirter's stories too?

good original story ruined.

I'm starting to wonder if your one of those sub undercover cucks?

that this story did the literary equivalent of spray painting a mustache and Mohawk on the Mona Lisa

You should have left the original alone, this is just crap😡😡😡

Sorry i read this crap. Ruined what had been a decent story, legal realities that screw men despite sob stories from NOW and another example of codefied inequities

leads to strive and turmoil. TK U MLJ LV NV

This story gave me chills. I hated how it worked out. That is what an author wants, I expect. It's a clear 5.

You fixed it alright. You took two reasonably sensible people with a serious marriage problem, turned one into a neurotic wimp and the other into a self-centered bitch. And you turned a "story" into nothing but a pointless narrative with no real ending.

Thanks.

This is basically a role reversal on the usual super nice guy who's not very smart stays in the marriage for the sake of kids. Functionally the marriage has been dead for years. Yet he imagines his wife will be devastated when he leaves and will be destroyed, living in sack cloth and ashes. Unfortunately he substituted magical thinking for real plans.

He is shocked that she too intended to leave the marriage when the kids left the nest, the only difference is she carefully planed her post marriage life.

He is dumb, she is clever. I think the ire of many readers is that 'nice guy' must triumph, and the woman get humbled, and here it is just the opposite.

Chilleywilley

You lost it. The story seemed interesting, but where the FUC did it go. I know it fell off a flat Earth......bill

1, Sry I was disappointed. ...

never read anything written by this no talent hack again

Being as asshole author, he knows all about assholes.

Other than the fact he steals names from old cartoon penguins, he basically hates men. I realized this when he mentioned that most cheating wife stories were written by old men. Is that old white men or old black men,Chilly? I can assure you I am not old!

Yeah, the cheating wife wins...for now. If this were a true story, we have to hope that the Christians aren't right becasue she may have won here, but I suspect she will lose in the big roulette wheel upstairs...oh that's right, she is going the other way.

I just don't see why he felt he needed to write this. I am glad only skimmed through it otherwise I would have been stupider than the guy here.

She was too unreasonable to be honest and he was too unreasonable to be approachable - ouch.

A whole new level of stupid!

Don't take a good story and fuck it up with bullshit like this.

but you need to go to the black board and try again. The brother, dad and the husband along with the lawyers were fucking morons.

The wife cheated and tricked her husband into raising another man's son. He found out. Period.

The original story was a flip on the traditional tale of a long suffering wife and mother who remains in an unhappy marriage with a cheater husband for years "for the children." It was unrealistic, yes, because in real life the husband would either have left his wife right away or over the next 10 years might have turned into an alcoholic wife beater or just died of a heart attack from the stress of trying to keep his pain and anger bottled up. But who wants to read realism on Literotica?

Took a good story and ruined it.

Not creative enough to start a story.

This story destroyed cpete story. Chilly you are one sick person. Go back on your meds.

Where kiddie porn and tortuing puppies is probably also socially acceptable. Regardless of their gender, it is ALWAYS a bad thing when cheaters win.

The last commenter said there wasn't one redeemable feature in the story. Untrue. It ended, which put us all out of our collective misery after having read this story, thus giving it one redeemable feature. Personally, I think the author owes us money for our time..........

This story is so bad that there is not one redemable thing in it.

Boy, did this story take a wrong turn. I had to go back and reread cpete's story. That was a good story and should have been left alone. This is the usual "the man is always wrong" type of story. She was just so misunderstood and lonely while he worked and worked for what. In our society, the man is supposed to provide for the family. What does the family provide for the man? Another man's son? The wife is just a complete cheating slut who couldn't be trusted alone. Another woman who wants her husband to provide (read give her money) for her and still have her excitement with others so she wouldn't be "lonely" with just a little child.

Didn't like this version. I was put off by it. This story didn't have a happy ending, but that wasn't what put me off. I felt that this author got the wife's character completely wrong. She was a cold-emotionless bitch. She was so cold and emotionless that she was as unrealistic as the husband was in the other version.

Anytime someone asks for a divorce out of the blue, there is a level of shock. Even if both parties wanted a divorce, there is still a level of initial shock. This author had her reaction to reading he divorce papers like she was proof reading an essay. Then, she readily admits to having multiple affairs with the same nonchalance. Even the revelation that their youngest son wasn't his got no reaction. Her response was completely unrealistic.

First of all, no person who has spent years lying would give up the truth with no emotion. She told him of her many affairs with the same ease she would be conversing about an unpleasant situation at her job. If she was that emotionless about it at this point, there is no way she would have taken the time and energy to hide it before now. Secondly, the revelation that your child doesn't belong to your husband effects more than just your marriage. To have 0 emotions about this makes you a sociopath. Third, anytime a marriage ends there is a level of emotions. Whether you are extremely happy and relieved, or completely torn apart, you experience something. She was "at peace", from the beginning. That is not real.

No realism.

An animated Penguin is smarter and( probably) a better Writer than you. You put all the weight on the Male. Suffer from penis envy? You said they didn't communicate. That meant, neither did she. So paying bills is an Offense punishable by Cuckolding?

sorry

The tragedy of the original story was failure to communicate, failure to grow together and a failure to face reality, or in his case even recognize reality. If they discussed their needs, which is unlikely, they didn't successfully meet them. As a result, the marriage died in it's early years, and we can see why. Cpete says he worked two jobs plus went to school, so he neglected her particularly at the time she was saddled with a small child. He struggled with long work hours which we presume were challenging and fulfilling, she struggled with drudgery, loneliness and boredom. For her the joys of young married life were a hell of a long way from her reality.. They owned a house, and perhaps in retrospect, they should have reduced their expenditures at that time to enrich their lives and lived a bit. Obviously they failed to communicate with each other to discuss their unhappiness. Given his immaturity and delusional view of others, I suspect he wouldn't be able to understand what his wife might have told him.

The male character never grew up. He harbored fantasies of what others were, everybody was on a pedestal, standing pure and noble in his eyes, his parents, his brother, the woman next door. He couldn't see reality, and not seeing reality is a fatal flaw. He and his wife both, independently, did what it took to stay married for the sake of the children. Unknown to each other, and for different reasons, both planned for the end of the marriage. Her plans were well laid, his were built on sand, his daydreams became his conviction of what would be with no basis in reality.

I think my story, while clearly a tragedy, is much more realistic than the original. A successful marriage requires both parties get their needs met, recognize that all of us change over the years, and that we need to make sure as we do mature, we adjust to support each others changing needs.

Chilley

.

You warn them by the title's name. As Britease went out of his confort zone in his story "kim", you did as well. You took this as a challenge. It is good to see you challenge your self. KUDOS to you for the attempt. With that said I personally didn't like the outcome. I like BTB or in some cases reconcilation.

Very terrible addendum. If you're determined to make the husband a loser (as in many of your tales), let the readers know you are a "bth" (burn the husband) fan.

Sorry but the original was SO much better. Yours had no real "flow" to it and was simply not interesting or clever.

This author's attempt was a total failure. Although it was easy to follow it was a dismal depressing and pathetic account of a story that was good. Because this was a rewrite, there were expectations of a better read. However, the original was quite good and this paled in comparison.

All of the fervent commenters here are closet cases - insecure virgins who hate themselves and women. The story was insightful ,lightyears above the comprehension level of the average wannabecucks commenting here.

You wanna be a writer. Write your own stories. Don't take somebody else's story and turn it to trash!

You really missed this time. Took a pretty good story and trashed the hell out of it.

Must of been written by an asshole. Sorry excuse redux to original story (which was infinitely better than this piece of trash).

I seriously doubt many men enjoyed this story (thus the low rating). Like most men who read stories here at LW, I was looking for the hero to be the winner and not the loser. I think most men who read LW stories or either men who lost out in a divorce or men who want to hear how THEY could be the one getting even with an ex or a want to be ex.

I have never been thru a divorce, but as we all know, losers far outnumber winners. This guy not only lost his wife who seemed to have cheated on him most of their marriage and gave him a bastard son to raise. He also lost any respect he had for his step brother and his dad. And of course the former neighbor lady he was hoping to rely on turned out to be out of his league as well. His entire life seems to have been one big lie or deception. I think most men fear that more than anything. They dont want to find out they were being played and now have nothing. Their adult life was one big farce. I would suspect this story happens much more than not and is there fore probably closer to reality than we, especially men, want to admit and probably rates a very high value.

I only gave this story 2 * but now wish I had said 4. I can not say 5 because it seems being the good, honest, fair guy really sucks. Life can be that way but I have to have some sympathy for the poor bastard.

thanks for nothing

I read something couldn't make it out so full of selfish bitch shit like you would hear from a man hating cunt yada yada yada on and on, so when you write a story with characters and not stereotypes made up in a haze of male hating fog do try again, for as you may mot realize we all love it when the per-description matches the story 20 pts my ass, hahaha

Most lit lw stories end up with the divorced guy with a new hot wife or gf and they live happily ever after. Not so in real life, but these are stories after all.

Not the direction that I would have thought an alt version would go. A bit too surreal for my tastes. Thanks.

Fanfare is right, of course. Even when it upsets you, makes you squirm, makes you rage, makes you hurt. The whole point of writing, and reading, is to think outside the narrow confines of societal expectations to the reality of what it means to be human, warts and all. Most people, include the very vehement commentators on here, are flawed. Are we going to play the "Your flaw is worse than mine!" game? Or are we going to grow up and look at all the things the story raises and deal with them? Adultery is awful, no question about it, but so is emotional abuse, so is physical abuse, so is _______________ You fill in the blank. There is no worse thing than to be human. There is no better thing, either. That is the paradox of our existence, that out of the greatest ugliness can come lessons and insights and growth of the best kind. It's like the song says: "You can't have one (people) without the other (failure)!"

Okay...hopping off my soapbox now! :)

chilleywilley, I want to compliment you for your recreation of 'Family Guy'. From all the hate spewing misogyny you have garnered, evidently you struck a vital nerve in many of the perpetual adolescents who comment on this site.

Those pseudomales, who confuse punching out some one physically weaker then them, with masculinity. They grunt and groan for a minute or two, squirt out a dribble of semen then roll over snoring and they call that sex. They will even boast of their 'accomplishment' to every male acquaintance, who will pretend to be an equally skilled 'lothario'. Pathetic losers one and all.

If the point of marriage is to structurally develop a family unit then the marriage of Amanda and Mark was a great success. As was the marriage of Mark's parents. Both marriages successfully raised and released descendents. Now all the anonymousies are in full hormonal hysteria that the female cattle somehow failed to prop up the manly expectations of the self-deluded.

One more point. I did not find any mention of Mark's father's homosexuality in the comments. I find that interesting that the commentators are too horrified to admit that a "good father", a gay man, is capable of raising children. That their little mindsets are shrinking away from the meaning of what you wrote. A good story makes the reader think. This story makes the reader ponder their own parents lives and what grisly secrets lay hidden under the facade of normality and apple pie.

Her's the thing. If you don't make a marriage work, if you can't express your needs to one another, if you are not getting your needs met, you have to talk. Work it out. This couple couldn't communicate and it left them living together with what they both knew wasn't a real marriage, neither one able to fulfill the others needs.

They couldn't change. He was a very nice guy, there were lots of women out there that would love to put their shoes under his bed, it's just that the two women in this story weren't the ones for him. That's the story here.

As to adultery. People do dumb things, They are weak sometimes, and strong at other times. The assumption in the Loving Wives area is that all cheating is exposed and the cheater properly stoned to death. In the real world most cheating is not caught (what are the chances?), and sometimes the only way to stay in a marriage is to get your needs met elsewhere. This marriage is an inner tube with a patch or two, not good enough for some, but OK for others.

Chilley

"Except for the perverts out there (and who gives a fuck about them?) the readers here tend to have some belief in fidelity and the sanctity of marriage."

Blow it outta yer ass cucky.