All Comments on 'Female Bully Ch. 03'

I won’t repeat myself, but the story isn’t good, the characters are trash, the pacing is always too fast. That’s what I have to say.

-Dillon

Let's start with my pacing. My 100 followers seem to think it's okay, since they've all been following me for at least a week now, but you and a couple of other commenters don't. I will follow the majority. You've been reading several of my stories now despite claiming that they are shitty yet you still turn up. Unless you are a first year law student like myself writing in between lectures with shitty university wi-fi, or writing stories while taking a similarly demanding course, I suggest you stop belittling my works. More people support me than those who don't.

Tiffany is MEANT to be trash. She and all the other girls in my stories are. They are symbols of how in the real world, the good girls aren't the ones that snag the innocent, virgin boys. It's the bad girls who manipulate and scheme and win the prize. They are rogues. Modern day pirates in how they pursue the guys they want. They are evil because they engage in acts of violence, blackmail and straight out rape, and I don't endorse such behaviours in real life. But it's not the straight-laced sonnets people remember. It's the crazy loves.

She is the only trash person in the story. Simon valued his virginity above all else and he gave it up to her out of love for his sister. To protect his sister, he sacrificed his own virginity and let Tiffany defile him.

She must really love him if shes willing to do all that!! I wish the happy couple all the best

YOU GO GIRL, Simon is one lucky guy.

I dont think Tiffany is trash, she loves Simon and is willing to go to great lengths to have him, she is a strong black woman hunting a man she loves. She knows whats best for her and Simon as a couple. Simon would not have given in to her if he didn't feel the same way, both he and Tiffany express their love the best way the know how.

I hate to say this, but criticism is part of the writing community. Not just me, but the other people that commented on your stories, criticism and suggestions that can help your story improve. Which that means trying something different and having the commenters critique it, if you remember the commenters commenting on your story ‘Playgirl's Obsession‘. One of them said to “add some variety”, which is experimenting like having the characters adults in the working world or SFW where a female friend is more dominant.

Now here’s a question, does your 100 follows gave you criticism? Do they tell you what they like or dislike about the story? Improvements can help you gather more followers and a good fanbase, writing is an art form and as some who has been rejected multiple times, it’s a hard industry including erotica. If you want the commenters to stop belittling you(even though they’re not). Then improved your stories, it’s not hard, it takes time. But it’s worth it at the end, the little improvements can changed a lot and you’ll have lots of positive comments.

I recommend reading saddletramp1956 stories, his work is examples of different variety of stories and characters. It’ll at least give you an idea of how to structure your story and make it better. It can help you in the long run.

-Dillon

Some of my followers have sent private feedback saying they appreciate how concise my stories are. I keep my works short so people can enjoy them on short notice on their way to campus, during lectures when the lecturer is droning on and on, or in between study sessions. They are meant to be brief so that the busy reader can just read a story and then get back to doing what they are supposed to do, like drawing mind maps or doing practice papers.

On your suggestion that I try something different, I suppose I've also been inspired by how my sisters and their friends treated people. One is now convicted felons because she isn't as rich as the girls in my stories and couldn't get away with drugging her crush. I always write very immoral, selfish girls because I believe there is a dark part of the human mind has an impulse that symphatize with and even occasionally root for the evil people in real life. They do all sorts of unacceptable things such as blackmail but that's what makes them stand out. They are criminally insane, but they also do what many people wish they have the guts to.

As for adult characters, the only girls/women I have ever met are my classmates university or back at my high school, so I don't know how adult women think or act, other than my mother. And professor/student relationships are a MASSIVE no in my country. Not even I feel comfortable crossing that line. So I don't know anything about how boys my age can meet older women since I'm always at home when I'm not in classes. I will try to figure something out though.

Is that people would think femdom is this gritty lifestyle of forcing submissive males to be in a relationship. The thing is about femdom is more about the communication and the respect, does she need to force him to be with her? Does the male have ever ounce of respect? I advise you to try gentle femdom where it’s more respected compare to the general femdom. Respect is really what makes a likeable character. There’s a subreddit on Reddit called ‘Gentle Femdom’, it’s inspirational and it can help you with the work.

I’m not saying to changed your work, but many people would get the wrong idea of femdom, you’re doing a good job on the sex scenes. Like I said in the last comment is having different variety of femdom stories, gentle and not gentle.

Does your university have any female professors? I don’t know if your country had any female professors, but if you really want to write adult female characters, my best option is to read books. Like actual novels, it can help you get a feeling of an female adult. Trust me, it help me a lot.

-Dillon

The next story will also have a woman who is slightly older than the boy. That's all I'll tell right now so as to not give too much away.

I suppose my lack of proportionality in my femdom stories is due to lack of exposure since my country is kind of patriarchal. There's very few vanilla erotica and almost no femdom stories in my own language. I actually learned English for to consume foreign pornography that can meet my tastes. But I will try to add more variety. I already got one briefly outlined with an age difference of about five years.

Tus historias son cheveres, deberías hacer una inspirada en un mundo con roles invertidos.

Damn that sucks. Was hoping for at least one more before it ended. Was hoping was gonna bang him in front of her friends like she said. Oh well. Good work though.

I love your stories so much! I really like how girls dominate even during acts that are usually perceived as a dominance of a guy. Also I like raceplay and gentle sph. You are a great author, please continue