Fifth Anniversary Honeymoon Cruise Ch. 05

"Then, I know you couldn't have done it, but I saw his suitcase taken by the baggage handler to the ship, but his case never showed up. You must have had something to do with it, but I don't know how. Then all those EB & T Bulletin pictures! I don't know who came up with that Mabel Synthron thing but it obviously didn't fool you. It seems funny now, but it was nerve wracking then. We checked the passenger list but you weren't on it, but I know that you had to have been on board. Also, Henry's credit cards didn't work! You really did a number on us.

"I don't know if it was your intention, but by the end of that cruise I was thoroughly disillusioned by Henry. That imperturbable man lost it throughout the cruise! My idol most certainly had feet of clay! Of course, the most painful thing of all was receiving that card from you on our anniversary! Up until that last moment I still hoped for a miracle and that you could forgive me even if I didn't deserve it. When I got back to the house and found the pictures and the divorce documents I had absolutely no defense so I signed immediately and returned them to your lawyer. I never even bothered to get a lawyer of my own.

"Anyway, we had the turmoil with Henry and those others "leaving for other opportunities." I was kept on in my same job, thanks to you. Even more, after being on probation in the division, my assignment was made permanent. The crowning event, however, was being told that I was going to be made a junior vice president next year. It may sound funny but being told that I probably would be promoted next year was the impetus to leaving. When I heard about it I actually had that same feeling of an obsessive desire for success, to move up at whatever cost, that had dominated me before the cruise. I thought of advancing upward and I was shocked at having that same feeling of superiority and arrogance that had led me to putting career over love and marriage.

Actually it was that compulsive, almost neurotic, desire that caused all of this. It really was a compulsion. I think that it was like the 49ers after the gold in California. Men left their wives, their children and their homes without thinking, driven by gold fever. Mine was a different fever, but I was driven the same way. Without that, I would have stopped Henry's advances as soon as they started. Anyway, one night I was sitting in my apartment thinking about my situation and I was thinking of you and, almost as if you were there warning me, I realized what was happening to me. I saw myself succumbing to that same manic desire to be in the rat race and move up.

"I suddenly had an epiphany and realized something! I'm like an alcoholic with power and position as my drink. At the bank I would be perfectly normal but I would get drunk on ambition if offered a boost in my career prospects. I was drunk several times when you sobered me up. Afterwards I saw what I was doing and was determined to remain sober, but one 'fix" from Henry and I was drunk again.

"It sounds ridiculous, but that was what seemed to have happened. For example, after cancelling our cruise that night I planned to go into the office and back out of the conference cruise immediately. Unfortunately, as soon as Henry got to me, I was lost again! Anyway, when I was told of my probable appointment to be vice president, I felt myself being taken over by that same invidious drive to succeed regardless of cost. I really felt the pull. Like an alcoholic it seems that one drink is one too many for me!

"I asked myself, 'Is this what I want?' I thought about it for several weeks and the answer was no! So, I resigned and I've never had a moment of regret. Somebody else can break that glass ceiling, it won't be me! If I ever have another husband and marriage, they won't be sacrificed to my ambition!"

She finished talking and looked up at the clock. "On my god, Mark, look how long I've been talking! Well, I let it all come out and I really thank you for listening to me. I hope that it didn't sound as if I was trying to excuse myself in any way."

"No Julie, I don't have that impression at all. It was a very difficult time, a very painful time for both of us, and I'm glad to have your prospective on it. I know that talking about things can be difficult, particularly agonizing things. Maybe we both will be better off and we can let go of some hurtful memories. As I said, it was good to get your prospective. However, there are a few things I would like to explain, but it's gotten late so I had better go. I'm moving into a new condo tomorrow so I need to get home and get ready. I'm sure that the move will be stressful, but I'm looking forward to it. If you're interested, I could give you a call in a day or so and we could talk further."

Julie had been thrilled to see Mark and do the apologizing that she had wanted to do for almost a year. In addition, reestablishing a friendly relationship with him was more than she had expected. She was afraid, however, that she would not hear from him again, but, to her pleasant surprise, five days later he called and asked if she would like get another pizza and come see his new condo. "As I feared, there were a number of problems to be fixed before I could move in, but the place is finally finished. I still need some more furniture, but it's mostly done."

"Is it a new building?"

"No. It was a hotel that they have been converting to condos. Actually, everything has been completely refurbished so, in a way, the inside is new. I was fortunate in that I was able to buy my place before they had converted it, so it's exactly what I wanted. I'm pretty pleased with it. Why don't I pick you up when you leave work? I'll drive you home afterwards. I'll have a pizza delivered after we look around the place. We shouldn't be too late."

"That would be wonderful, Mark. There are still some things that I should explain and a few things that I would like to ask. I'll be ready around 5:00."

As they arrived at Mark's condo, Julie was impressed as she said, "Oh yes, I remember this hotel. It looks out over Woodland Park, doesn't it?"

"Yes, that was one of the reasons I was interested in it. It's a beautiful view." He drove past the security guard into the underground garage and parked in a private area near a bank of three elevators. One was separate from the other two and Mark put his hand against plate beside the door and it opened into a surprisingly ornate elevator. There were only a few buttons, Garage, Main, 16 through 19 and PH. They got in and he pushed PH and they started up.

Julie looked at the indicator and asked, "There aren't many stops. What floor is it on? What does PH stand for... wait a minute, don't tell me that your condo is the penthouse! Oh my god, Mark, that's wonderful!"

"Yes, I was lucky enough to hear about this place and was able to buy it. This elevator only stops at the top floors so there is no long wait. Actually, there are three elevators and the other two go from main to 19 so they're often are crowded. Security is tight and that plate reads your identity to permit the door to open.

Just at that moment the elevator stopped and the door opened onto a small atrium with potted plants, an emergency door to stairs and one large luxurious entry door. Mark placed his palm on another metal plate and the door swung open. Julie shook her head as he stepped aside and gestured for her to enter into a beautiful foyer. For the next hour Mark gave her a guided tour that left her bedazzled. Four bedrooms, the master bedroom with two large walk-in closets, four full bathrooms plus powder room, a gourmet kitchen, a living room for which the modern term "great room" was applicable! "Oh, Mark, this is perfect! It's just the kind of place we talked about for years - our dream home. I love it!"

"Well, obviously, it is luxurious. This hotel was built back in the day when the wealthy competed to have the biggest, most opulent houses to impress each other. They lived large - things like the separate elevator so they didn't have to associate with common people! This penthouse was built for an ultra-rich couple who were part owners of the hotel. It certainly is a lot more house - a lot more - than I need, but there was one more thing that was the clincher for me." He walked over to the outside wall of the living room and pushed a button and the drapes covering that wall pulled back revealing floor to ceiling windows the width of the living and dining rooms. Through them Julie could see a large, wide terrace running the width of the building looking out over Woodland Park. "This is the main reason why I bought this place."

The entire terrace was covered with beautiful plantings, the featured element being two mature trees planted in ground-level pits. Much of the area was covered in grass with flowering plants and shrubs. There was even a small pool and hot tub. "This place was owned by that couple for over thirty years and they created this entire amazing garden. They had to give it up when their health failed and, afterwards, the penthouse was rented short-time by the hotel to a number of famous people. When the hotel was converted to condominiums this became available and my agent showed it to me. I bought it largely for the terrace and the views over the park. The interior was far too rococo for me so I found an architect, told him what I wanted inside and this is the result. Fortunately there's a gardening service that takes care of the terrace! No work for me. Having money is a wonderful thing!"

"Well money is wonderful but you spent it the right way. The house is perfect, the terrace is amazing and the view of the park is marvelous. It must be incredible at night with the city lighted up! You're going to love living here! I honestly don't envy the money you have but I do envy this! What a place to live!"

Just then the pizza arrived and they ate while starting a conversation. "I see that you are not wearing the rings you bought on the ship." He laughed and continued, "I was standing right behind you when you bought them!"

"Oh my god, no! How on earth didn't I see you? Anyway, I only wear them when I think that I need to let people know that I'm unavailable. I'm certainly no raving beauty, but I'm female and that's all that's needed sometimes."

"Do you get hit on much? Don't any of those lawyer-types appeal to you?"

"I did get hit on at first, but they quickly found out that I wasn't available. I'm just not interested and a wedding ring does wonders." She hesitated, wondering if she should go on. "There are a lot of attractive men, like those graduate students I mentioned, but...do you remember the scene at the end of Superman II when Lois Lane looks up at Clark Kent who is trying to console her because their love affair is over? With tears in her eyes she says, 'You're a hard act to follow!' Well, you may not be Superman, but for me you are an impossible act to follow.

"It may be hard to believe after watching those recordings of me and Henry, but you are still the only man I have ever loved. He never loved me and I damn sure never loved him. I admired and respected him and I idolized him for how good he had been to me. However, even before I discovered his feet of clay, it was not love. On the ship I didn't want to have sex - well, not have intercourse - with him and I avoided it the first night by promising that I would do it tomorrow. The next night I stood in the shower and decided that I was going to tell him that I couldn't do it. But, as always, I gave way. I was a coward and I let him fuck me and... and... damn it, I enjoyed it, but I really didn't want to. That's sounds stupid, but it's true.

"I honestly don't know what power he had over me, but when he told me to do something, I did it. That was understandable when we were in the office and he was my boss, but not outside. I think that I had been conditioned to obey him because he was so good to me in those early months when everything was above board. When he started the slow seduction I was really under his spell. The certainly was not an excuse because, as I told you, I knew it was wrong as he went from hugging to kissing and from kissing to starting sex in the office.

"The same control was there on the ship which is why I think I gave in. That complete control ended early though. It may be hard to believe, but you helped end it. One day, I think it probably was the second full day, he thought that you were responsible for the EB & T Bulletin and started to use nasty language about you and I blew up at him. I think that we both were shocked, but he never did it again. After that we were pretty much on an equal footing. I just wish I had blown up at him before the cruise. I never would have been on it.

"Look, I don't want to embarrass you and I know that our ship has sailed, but I do love you. Unlike me, you have done absolutely nothing to kill that love. You were right that night when I cancelled our cruise that I had killed something wonderful - our marriage and your love for me. Unfortunately nothing has killed, or even damaged, my love for you. I hope that that won't bother or embarrass you and we can be together as friends."

Mark looked at her intently for a few moments and finally decided that this was the time. "Julie, I certainly am not bothered. In fact, I haven't been completely honest with you. Much of what you've told me I already knew because I've watched you closely ever since we left the ship. I hadn't planned to see you that afternoon when I met you with Margaret, but I would have arranged a meeting soon anyway. We needed to put the cruise and the last year in perspective and I wanted to explain some things that happened and my role in them.

"First, let me satisfy some of your curiosity. Let's go back to the breaking point, the night you canceled our cruise. As you know I was crushed and I knew that we were through. I woke up the following morning absolutely devastated. I wasn't actually thinking, just accepting that you had chosen Henry and that cruise over me. I dragged myself upstairs and started to dress when I saw your beautiful clothes hanging there.

"At that point I blew up! I said to myself that you weren't going to wear them for him! I started to destroy them but, suddenly, I cooled down and began to think that ripping them up wouldn't accomplish anything. Then I checked the drawer where you had stored your fancy lingerie and in it I found a pair of panties from Victoria's Secret that you had just bought two days before, obviously to wear for Henry. That added to my fury and I began to plan to ruin the cruise. I went down to my office, sat down at my desk and did that planning.

"I called a lawyer I had worked with and he connected me with a divorce lawyer in the same firm. He, in turn, brought in a security expert who runs an agency that rivals the CIA. I told them my plans and needs and everything came together. I wanted evidence of adultery for a divorce and I booked a cabin on the ship. Actually, I had an interior cabin right across the corridor from you! You were in 1640 and I was in 1643. My security people had two cameras put in your room and I could download the recordings every day. I had an audio connection so I could listen to you all the time!"

"Oh my heavens, I had no idea! I'm embarrassed - the things you must have seen and heard!"

"Yep, the whole thing - oral sex the first night, intercourse the second night. I heard him order you to 'put me in,' which you obviously did!"

"Oh my god, Mark. I...I don't know what to say! It must have been horrible for you!"

"Yes it was, but I expected it. I knew that it was coming from the time your guilty face told me that Henry was going to be with you on the cruise. Of course, I had really been fooled by that note that a Ms Mabel Synthron was your companion!!"

"Yeah, that was stupid. I told Henry that you were too intelligent to believe that. My guilty face would have given me away anyhow."

"That last time I asked who was going with you the name Henry Johnstone might as well have been written on your forehead. Anyway, my plans went into effect before you got on the ship. You carefully packed your suitcase with the clothes we bought for our cruise. I packed an identical suitcase with your older clothes and the Walmart stuff. When I brought your packed suitcase down I replaced it with the one I packed. No magic!"

"Damn it, I never thought of that! Two suitcases never entered my mind!"

"The following morning I was home - in that little space in the basement. When I heard you in the shower, I just came up and took your rings."

"My god you were sneaky. Actually, that morning I was a wreck. Not seeing you, going on that cruise with Henry, everything - so I wasn't thinking clearly. Blast you, I was on my knees looking for my rings for half an hour before I gave up! That was mean!"

"I felt like being mean! Then when you got to the port, your limo driver was paid to stop at a particular spot where our baggage handler took your and Henry's suitcases. Yours got put on the baggage cart and his just kept right on traveling and was never seen again. In addition, Henry's credit cards had already been reported as lost and replacements needed."

"Good heavens, how many people were working for you?"

"A cast of thousands! While the three of us were cruising the Caribbean, back home my divorce lawyer and my security firm were collecting evidence on the seduction gang at your bank, including Henry Johnstone and James Devon. My divorce lawyer hated people like those cheaters and seducers who break up families and cause divorces. He was a friend of your CEO and gave him the evidence."

"Jesus, Mark, I can't believe all of that! One thing is clear, Henry chose the wrong married woman to seduce! You're a bad man to cross. My god, I had no idea!"

Anyway, once we were on the ship I became a publisher of the EB & T Bulletin! Jerry provided me with a Nikon camera with a 45x optical telephoto lens. I could have taken a close up picture of your face form 50-100 yards away. Incidentally, your nipples looked very nice in that whirlpool from the jogging track a 150 feet or so in front of you!"

"I'm amazed that we never saw you!"

"Ha, you did! When you bought that ring I was right at your shoulder. I ate at the Windjammer at a table right in front of you. I even had a short chat with Henry one day when you were at a meeting and I got up and nodded to you when you came back!"

"That was you? Oh, good heavens! Henry said that you were German. All I remember about that was that your arms were covered with tattoos!"

"Yep, waterproof, removable with alcohol. Mustache, dark rimmed glasses, hair parted in the middle. I was near you dozens of times."

"I just can't believe all of this! Damn, you were in control the whole trip, weren't you? I...l...l'm really embarrassed. I'm trying to think of anything I did with Henry that was really bad when I was out with him. The only time I remember doing anything affectionate with him was that time in the whirlpool and I did it then because of that silly bikini that exposed me every time I moved."

"No, to be totally honest, I watched a lot of things I regretted seeing, the things in those pictures, but I never once saw you make an affectionate move toward him. You had sex with him, got hot with him, but not because it was him. I saw the total lack of afterplay, something that is very important to you. You just rolled over to your side of the bed, totally uninterested in kissing, fondling or being held. I saw that and I heard your comments you made about me and they changed by perspective on everything.

"Understand, there was nothing I saw that I liked about you being with him for that week. It was what I didn't see made that change - no affection from you, no initiative for sex on your part. You became comfortable being naked but, in general, you seemed more like roommates than lovers - roommates with privileges. Frankly, I was surprised at how little that bothered me once I saw your total lack of affection. It seemed almost like a duty, doing what was expected, than any desire on your part. That was particularly true since I knew that you would enjoy it after he heated you up. In any case, by the time the cruise was over my unquestioned need for a divorce was gone.