All Comments on 'Finding'

As there's no aftermath, no reason why she cheated, no pov from the cheater its a very low scoring story imo.

If this was a film it would be bargain basement dvd worth 99p.

so where was the divorce and btb?

all he did was have her severed a petition, no divorce for months, certainly no btb

Good first chapter. Now you can move on to the best parts of a loving wives story, the actual confrontation with the cheating wife and the aftermath as she's forced to deal with the consequences of her infidelity.

Like the story a lot. Next chapter please. AAAA++++

Don't see where a sequel can go as he already has a replacement. However, a short epilogue to let us know how it happened from her pov and what happened to her would have been welcomed.

Yet another writer on this site praising the worst editor and writer on this site then saying they made changes after she edited. 1*

Get a NEW editor!

"She finally was appraising me of her physical condition"

APPRISING, not appraising. That was one of MANY, MANY errors!

I don't think anyone will be asking you FTDS. Paint by numbers crap

Who is Sue?

Nice set-up, I especially liked the beginning of the story.

Well concluded, since all the plot points are done.

But if you want to continue in the same quality.... I wouldn't complain either ^^

That was a great story in a nutshell. For me a little too fast in the development of the "afterwards" scenario, but still very well told. I liked. Thanks! 5*!!!

That worked. I sometimes wonder how easy it is to do these phone clone operations I keep reading about. Still, it makes for an interesting story and it gets easier every year to catch a cheat.

Not even in the February Sucks class.

Some things here are not possible no matter who you know and lesbians do not like creampies..bi sexual women may..not leabians..story too short with little character buildup on the wife and no real ending as to why she did it..to leave the ending out so others may fill it in is just a cop-out and lazy.

and a goodie.

I like your straight forward, no bullshit style.

Like the concept quite a bit, but didn't really feel any great emotional loss from the main character. He simply finds his wife cheating and immediately winds up with a ready-to-go replacement. I guess he didn't care all that much for his first marriage of eight years.

Where's the conversation with the wife and the explanation (or lack therein)? What was her motivation for taking such a chance that she tossed away eight years without a second thought?

I think we are missing key parts of the story, which is another way of saying it could have been longer and a little more involved. I enjoyed the writing - it flowed well and kept me interested. Just wanted...more.

It's finished, but with a very truncated finish. Easy to tell the difference between a satisfying ending and one that stopped short. If the idea was for other people to finish it, the problem is the conflict part was more or less resolved, it's just the denouement that was lacking. February Sucks and the other one had more controversial themes, so there's more incentive for people to put their spin on it to make their own canonical version.

Your story would be far better without the new relationship at the end. It distracts from the central conflict/plot and doesn't grow organically in the story. Kate has him remarried when he has just gone through a personal crisis.

You developed your story well. It has the right amount of tension and mystery. The extremely fast paced conclusion with the new girlfriend interrupted the pacing and leaves the reader feeling rushed and ultimately, unsatisfied

I have to give you credit, averaging about 15 followers per story published is a huge following and your prior stories must be very good. This one was well-word crafted for sure. But there were a few attention-grabbing departures for real life like the fact his wife calls him to join her for lunch and says 'you can bring someone along too if you want to'. OMG who would ever do that? Or another one at the end when Kate understood she would have to wait a few months (presumably for the divorce to finalize). Again, WTF...no reality there at all. As to finishing your story for you, I have done that a couple of times, but there is no story here to end. The wife is 'cheating' on him with another woman!! Good Lord! Hard to believe. I read somewhere that the average woman in America has some sort of sexual hookup with 3.2 other women in her first year of marriage and that almost doubles. Both of my wives had sex with other women; I know it was multiple partners over multiple decades but I never had any notion of finding out, or of even lodging any disapproval.

Anyway, keep 'em coming, sir.

Yeah, l liked the story, l did not like the shortened ending and the invitations for others to finish off the tale. Finish your own story first then invite others to have a go. Stop being lazy.

Scores 3/5. Would’ve scored 5/5 if the tale had been finished.

I don’t think this had the controversial subject or questionable ending that the other stories you mentioned so it is likely wishful thinking on your part, but I could be wrong.

Not a bad story but certainly one FULL of coincidence and fortunate circumstances.

Urrgghh.

FTDS indeed.

I come here to be told a tale, not make up the ending myself.

First, I truly enjoyed the story. But....

1) if you feel the need to explain the title, it is the wrong title.

2) you caught her, but just catching her, paying alimony and giving up part of your retirement does not equal a tag of BTB. They are getting divorced but she is far, far, far from a burned bitch.

But 4 * since it is not like being in the wrong category altogether.

Got fed up of trying to keep up with they said who said they did who did??

In other words got boring

2 stars. You're not as good as your haughty attitude makes you appear.

Firstly, it's a pleasure to read writing that shows wit and intelligence, whatever the story's other merits. I feel like I'm in capable hands. Now, on to the merits.

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The story's Discovery section is overloaded. Too much detail. Surely the point is that he finds out his wife is cheating, with the how being of secondary importance. "Finding Out", and how he feels about her betrayal, should carry more dramatic weight than than "Finding a Phone".

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Also given short shrift is the wife's character. I'd like to get to know her better, if only to experience vicariously the MC's emotions of shock, outrage, betrayal, and loss.

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The Kate character is a fun, vivid bit of invention. She takes over the story and makes it special. It's her character, not the intricacies of the phone as a means of discovery, that gives the story distinction, and makes it a 5 star piece of work.

Oh, yes, a second 5 for RWesson (the other one being "Butter Pecan"). I think he's not giving himself enough credit for originality. Sure, the basic path of a typical LW story is narrow, but he flip-phoned this around the edges to come up with something fresh. Love the StangStar06 reference (the process server, who at least in Illinois is Eliza Howell as per "Two Of A Kind"). But, amidst this praise, must also give this sharp rebuke. Sure, "Just Once...If You Don't Mind" by Kalimaxos is an invitational, just as "Law Of The Heart" and "One Slip" were. But "February Sucks" was never an invitational. The eruption of sequels was mostly due to dissatisfaction with how the story turned out, or otherwise inspired by the inspired situation GeorgeAnderson created. The only parallel to what happened with "February Sucks" is the spate of sequels to "Something We Have To Talk About" by nici, which were also fueled by dissatisfaction with the original's outcome (and likely also some misunderstandings, as nici actually carried the story forward through three differently titled sequels, "Between Two Lovers" - in 2 parts, and "It's All Good" - and anyone who read through all four stories would have seen a different judgment than might be inferred from just the opening one). Anyway, I'm not sure there's much here for an invitational. I tend to agree with RWesson that this story IS finished. I mean, unless Kate turns out to be a shit (which seems unlikely), all that's left is the divorce details and then a fine Romance, complete with children and good fortune.

Who is Sue?

I have to agree with some of the more constructive comments so far. This was a rushed, unfinished and/or polished work. It's particularly concerning because it has Randi's name attached to it. Randi and her acolytes produce some of the most consistent quality work in this genre, but your isn't. I really enjoyed the refreshing premise, but little else was "fleshed out" to provide enough content to draw me into your world. 3*

OK standard stuff. 5 stars for the writing, One minor item. Going out with another woman so quickly gives the wife ammunition to counter-sue for divorce and get a better deal. The attorney should have admonished them to delay dating.

I agree with the writer that the story is as finished as it needs to be. The wife cheated, the divorce documents are served, the husband's future relationship is clearly set out and I don't see a need for anything more, nor any reason to downgrade the story in the scores for not being finished.

As @looking4it indicated, there really isn't a reason for multiple continuations. In contrast to the story the writer referred to (February sucks) the decision on the future of the marriage is already made and the husband already has his future relationship lined up. Some might like to go different directions-some would like to see a reconciliation with the wife keeping her girlfriend in a triangle marriage, some might like to see some revenge thrown in, but with a pretty clear future already outlined, I see no reason to take it further and in a variety of directions.

Sorry to add an additional comment to the one I just wrote, but having looked through some comments, my reaction to the new relationship is the opposite to that expressed by @angelrider. I thought it did grow naturally as part of the story and found it a very satisfactory ending.

The issue I had with the story was Kate. I'd never use her Aunt as my attorney. I'd never date an employee from my work place. And I'd never get involved with an aggressive woman like Kate so early into my divorce. Kinda cold. And by NOT finishing the story, you do the entire process a disservice. Not good.

Generally well written though somebody named Sue made a brief appearance, but sadly all by the book and much too easy: she uses his car and just happens to leave her phone in it, said phone just happens to receive a call when he's next to it. Of course he knows she's cheating and just happens to have somebody on hand to do the necessary with the phone, she even arranges to set herself up for discovery, all so convenient and easy.

To be honest it was all pretty uninteresting, but I persivered hoping something might happen but I was forced to give up when Kate declared her desire (yawn). Skipping to the end I read the final sentence 'but life isn't going to be boring,' no matter what happens it won't be as boring as this story.

"Worst editor and writer on the site?" - LOL, that's why she has a long waiting list of people who want her to edit their stories.

Very solid little story. About only complaint is lack of exchange between husband and wife when she was served —- needed to “feel” her shock and awe 😎

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Appreciate your efforts and look forward to more down tne road.

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4 strong ****

Will give it 3.5 stars Not as good as your Butter Pecan Story.

Butter Pecan was really good, but this one was just weird

4. I enjoyed the story and I like the twist the wife is cheating with a woman who is eating the husbands creampies in quite a twist compared to the usual cheating wives stories but cheating is cheating so he was right to divorce her. It get a lower score because of the breakneck speed of things and the pretty abrupt ending.

Good story, even with the abrupt ending. I guess cheaters should beware of technology, as it seems to be increasingly easy to defeat security. A lesbian lover waiting for the cheating wife’s husband’s creampie is something I don’t think I’ve seen before.

No discussion with Clara, no attempt to understand? Just jumping into divorce? Must not have been much love to begin with. Also the beginning with poor with the car in the driveway, and the husband so angry, understanding what happened that he wanted to hurt her. Seriously?

Anyway a second chapter is probably not worth it. Either they finally talk and he can't forgive her or they try, and Katie gets hurt.

You jumped into divorce without him knowing much except that there was an affair. His not caring about the facts says a lot.

I gave you a 4. I doubt you will see people wanting to continue the story. The guy caught his wife, he had a woman wanting him. so now he starts anew. You ended it a little abruptly but not worth going forward.

"Well, it IS finished, at least as much as it absolutely needs to be. "

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No, it isn't. Lacking any why from Clara, the minimal -- if that much -- reaction. makes this only part of a story. The invitation for others to continue your own story is bullshit.

Another Techno/Mechanical How-To Story. The cuckold nerds must love it. All the technical and strategic and logistical methods and tricks detailed for a complete understanding of how, when, and who. The only small little question that Might be of interest to one or two (thousand) readers is ...... WHY! But that would involve addressing the Humanity of this story. The psychology, emotions, character and virtue of the people involved. But that would take some knowledge and understanding of human beings, their relationships, their strengths and weaknesses, their fears, arrogance, temptation, weakness, betrayal, love, romance . . ., God, people are complicated. Phones are easy. Texts, emails, call logs, GPS locators, credit card records: just a few printouts and audio files and your good to go.

Yeah, great story. Let somebody else write about what's her name and why she's a cheating whore and what went wrong with her marriage and what tempted her to risk her marital future for some she-slut's tongue every week or so. I mean, how you clone a phone, now that's compelling and dramatic and erotic.

Thanks for the effort.

Really his secretary’s waiting to catch him .pretty aggressive I would run from her for sure. Then changing the locks that’s such BS ,we all should know you can’t lock you wife out of both your houses. Why do writers put that in there stories . Pretty weak writing for sure.

to be honest there is no need for divorce wife if she is having fun with another woman, but protecting yourself for in case of divorce would be wise choice.

Women generally have higher libido also capable enough for long sexual play.

Very few men are capable enough to match that & completely satisfy women, so if she is finding pleasure with another woman shouldn't be that big of a deal.

Oh well. At least it wasn't another February Sucks rehash.

Pretty cookiecutter the only thing being a lesbian affair and the lover eating the cream pies (a bonus point for the chuckle there).

The opening soon revealed itself.

Who's Sue?

You obviously feel it isn't finished, so why not put it at the start - This is the opening to an invitational?

Writing was fine (a couple of typos I picked up on), I'll go look at your others.

Of course, the 'victim' in this sad little tale has a willing "replacement" all queued up and ready to go, the very instant the papers are served. Could you get any more cliché?

You have a decent plot but spoiled it with the "Kate" character. That rebound just look rushed and absurd. The BTB authors cannot live without some ridiculous rebound.

By the way, if Vickie is a true lesbian then she would not take it easy to have male competition, there would be jealousy and she would not be interested in "male creampies". Apparently a male writer does not get this distinction and does not anticipate such a situation.

Closure why would the wife do this

If there were a sliding scale for me to rate this, it would be a 4.6 story. The infusion of the secretary into the stories ending is what caused me to not give it a full 5 stars. I guess that can be corrected if others, instead of taking the story from your ending, back it up to where they separate after there lunch at Outback and used that point to put there own spin and ending to this story. Yes. I think if others want to finish it this would be the best point to start from. At least that's were I would start to craft my ending to your story. I enjoyed a lot of the alt endings to February Sucks, but to be perfectly candid, I'm a little sick of February Sucks and it really is beginning to suck. But as I have said many times, that's, Just One Mans Opinion.

He he.

That was kinda funny.

But if I was Joe, I would feel apprehensive with Katie.

Katie is or soon will be trouble too...

Better than he let her at arms length just to be safe.

Good story RWesson.

No thanks, write your own endings.

Nope. Not the least bit erotic. Just a tale of a sad man. Very formulaic. 1star.

Great writing but the story needs more

Three stars. Okay, but somewhat flawed in a few respects.

It was a rather compressed timeline of events.

Since wife was with a know female friend, seems to me there was not much need for the burner phone that triggered the sequence of events. They could talk 4 times a day and he wouldn't bat an eye.

Finally, who make a reservations or even calls a no tell motel? You just show up.

Your initial confrontation after the accident was cute, taking advantage of the readers' LW tropes and the poor communication that inevitably precedes so many extramarital relations in LW literature.

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But the rest of the story didn't live up to that clever intro.

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I'm not an expert on the legalities involved, so I take your word for it on being served/locking her out/etc. And I can buy that Kate staked an early claim, because you set that up with the discussion of her lack of personal life.

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However, is Kate planning on remaining his assistant after she puts the ball and chain around his ankle? I think he would go insane, because she would stop "assisting" and become more "controlling". And if she goes elsewhere in the company (or quits), she is going to be insanely jealous of her replacement.

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In short, Joe may feel like a highly-valued steak now that he's going back on the market, but his most motivated bidder wants to carve him up.

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I understand why you cut off the story here. There is no happiness in the future.

Short. Sweet. Effective. Excellent. 5.

I liked it, would like a sequel with the MC moving on with Katie. More resolution and happy times.

ok.

“ the wail that escaped her mouth as she started screaming and moaning at the same time "Noooooooooo."

…probably just the globally expected response to another author trying to set up another fooking ‘invitational’

Who was Sue?

Too emotionless.

Being honest, I don’t see throwing a marriage away so cavalierly, especially if the paramour is another woman without confrontation and explanation. This “trust” thing is way overblown. Your spouse could have more than one affair that you never find out about while you continue to trust them and benefit from your relationship while you continue to trust them. In fact, most trysts of short term are probably never discovered by the spouse of the cheater.

Let me guess...Randi wanted to turn the husband into more of a wimp than he was?????????

The worst part? Even if someone did enjoy eating cream pies, it's hard to get past he concept of wanting to eat hours old cream pies! Yuchhh!

I don't know which is worse, this story, or the usual willing cuck stories? Think about what you just read, think long and hard. Fine the wife cheated, not good. You want a divorce, fine, but the way this guy went about it, laughable. But it's fiction, so I guess one can laugh.

Not even a good prequel.

In many states, even no-fault, Adultery can be introduced to help define possible spousal support. Good story, but that bit of misinformation seems to rise up now and then.

That was an enjoyable story. 5*, of course. I think if you could write the same story from the POVs of Clara and Vickie, that would be worth pursuing.

eh kind of feels like it doesnt matter dont think there was any love there to begin with. he moved on before the ink was dry. probably would have happened anyway. started feeling like he was just looking for an accuse

not bad. I suppose it could be seen as finished but the ending was pretty weak. The way the characters are portrayed, neither of them cares about the other. The husband finds out his wife is cheating and immediately divorces her and plans to take out another woman the very next day lol.

Looks finished to me...I liked it! Cinco Estrellas!

Can't wait to see how other authors finish off this story.

Great read!!!

Confusing in parts,who was Sue and why did Clara not give him a reason for the long lunch hour.?

Short, Sweet and to the pint! No quarter given! Loved it! 4-Stars!

Wow! Great story. Kinda disgusting that the bull dyke wants to eat the leftover cum. But not all Lesbians, act like the ones in porn video’s.

She wanted to pull one over on Joe. That's what most cheating and other martial secrets involve: a subtle hatred for the person that you need, but erroneously believe confines you.

Good riddance to bad rubbish!

However ... I'm not so sure about his new love interest, either. You know, the one who, before he himself knows that he wants one, has already made an appointment for him with a divorce attorney ... that she herself has selected for him with zero input from him ... who is her own aunt.

Wow, is that an alpha female, or what?

Not sure that what I see in his future is any better than what he has now. Sure, good for his ego at the moment, but what about later on? Different, yes, but better?

Probably not.

Great Story, really liked it. Yes, it could be longer, but it covered the Basics.

Nice job. It’s crisp, a quick read, and does enough to develop the characters, in few words. There shouldn’t be any ending bitching, that ending is well chosen. It could have a sequel, since Kate is anxious, but the story won’t suffer without a sequel.

"My Mom, was a woman, my Dad was a man. They fucked, I was a bi-product of that union. They died, I found my wife was screwing my buddy. I wanted to shoot one of them. I just left instead." This is an example, of how you could have shortened this no ending story, even farther. 4 stars for the effort.

LOL, Great. Love Kate and her Aunt

What was the point of the napkin over the cell phone? Did he think she might just want to check her messages and then leave it there?

Well, it would be nice to see what Claire does and see the happy (I hope) ending for Joe and Kate. Either way it's a good story and I enjoyed it.

I will skip FTDS Vademonium1 etc you did well.

Almost perfect for a flash story. The only issue is the btb tag. Divorce is the minimum consequence of adultery, not a punishment. The wife was not burned in any way!

ZK

Quite a few elements in this story offer avenues for follow-up and I'm sure some will take advantage of the opportunity. Liked the story and of course think the plotline was developed well, so kudos on that.

A couple of thoughts re the characters:

The husband (Joe) is clearly someone who is easily led and his reaction to Kate's "railroading" does not bode well for his future after the mindless bliss of his pre-marriage sexual "teasing" and subsequent consumation offered by Kate. Kate (as her Aunt Lucille states) is a force of nature and gets what she wants, hence the railroading's superfast success in acquiring divorce documents. It's all very unrealistic but makes for an entertaining story--"fast flash" it certainly is. One area which is bothersome is the speed with which Joe's "deep love" for his wife of eight years Clara disappears to be instantly replaced by a willingness to fuck and marry his assistant Kate, with whom he'd had absolutely no romantic involvement previously. Makes one think his character and commitment (to Clara) were as weak as his ego.

As for the wife Clara, she seems not to have stiffed him on his quota of affection and sex over her short affair with Vickie, who'd only joined her firm 14 months before--it must have taken at least a few months for Vickie to seduce the wife. As Joe says...Clara was "normal, loving, and funny" the night of his discovering her affair. I repeat..."normal, loving, and funny"--so they obviously had a good, possibly great, marriage. Though he later says..."cheating is cheating"(which suggests a rigid mindset), he didn't even think for one moment of talking things out with her to see if he had given her any reason to stray (which was unlikely given her stated love for him, but still...) nor did he even think of having marital counseling to try and save the marriage; nor did he contemplate that ubiquitous male fantasy of a threesome with his wife and her lesbian lover Vickie. I mean, come on--to not even THINK about counseling or a menage a trois?? Shows how shallow his eight year loving relationship with Clara actually was--as well as his limited imagination! It also foretold how overwhelming Kate's future domination of him would be.

I did enjoy the story but would have wished it had been fleshed out more--but then it wouldn't have been a "flash tale", would it? So...well done on writing the story YOU imagined. Kudos and more please.

Good story, but it makes me think of an honest question. If the wife is secretly bisexual and he finds her cheating with another woman, does it mean an immediate divorce? If she is meeting all of hubbys needs both sexually and support wise, is there room to allow her sex with a female lover. By definition he cannot meet her 'other' sexual needs so he's not threatened or emasculated. Somewhat different than polyamoury since he doesn't necessarily have to like her lover. I've never read any stories that explored this possibility.

well, a cute story in places, and some good detective work with the phone. Cheating is cheating when you sneak around behind you spouses back, doesn't matter if it's same sex or not. The only way it wouldn't be cheating is if they both agreed to invite another person into their marriage, but then again a marriage is between two people, except of course in Utah.

I did like it but wanted more. As others have said he didn't even meet with his wife to find out why she never told him she was bisexual. She did cheat but he wasn't getting bad mouthed or put down in any way. I think he should have talked to her. Who knows maybe he would have been asked to join them? Still a well written story.

Well, I do enjoy a rarer twist to the familiar story. Thanks!

Good story

I think I read it before and it got CINCO ESTRELLAS!

"I guess no one expects to be caught when they set out to cheat." Those are some true words. They rank right up there in irony with the classic, "I didn't take anything away from you."

No wonder she got new lover, he was so thick, why anyone would want him is beyond me. Once they met at the restaurant it was obvious who the lover was. I gave a very generous 3*

So glad that he decided to divorce his cheating wife. Can't stand the stories where the husband is "okay" with his wife cheating because the AP is a woman. Cheating is cheating.

End the dam story!

nicely done!

Helen 1899- I don’t understand your comment about the husband. If you mean he was “ thick”, because he as clueless, to what his wife was doing? I guess you have never been in a loving relationship. It is normal, for people in love, to trust each other. Until, it’s not. And THAT is the biggest reason, cheaters get divorced. The trust is broken. I thought the story was excellent. Gave it a “5”. As far as “ nobody would want him”, have you seen the choices, most women are faced with? Finding a guy who

#1. Is good looking

#2. Has a good job, is a good provider.

#3. Is loyal

Most woman have a better chance, of winning the lottery. Than finding a man, like that husband in this story.

Tepid tale 4