All Comments on 'First Estate'

This is the best story I have ever read on this site, bar none. You said you have a publisher, I can see why. This is professional level work, and high professional level, at that. Not only this site, but anywhere, for that matter. I have given three fives. This is the fourth and I would give it ten. The rest will have to wait till in the morning. I can't wait to get back to it.

I want to adopt Boston, and Sagan and the others may be the sexiest women ever written on here. Lilith, god, she would probably kill me, but what a way to go. Incredible story. Best ever in this category, maybe anywhere.

Take your time and savor this one, like a great slice of prime rib. It's just that good! Imagine a story with a plot that is well written and delivered perfectly. This is that story.

I wouldn't know how to justify giving it less than five. A huge story from a powerhouse writer. Simply the best around.

One of the best (if not the best) stories I've ever read here. I have over 2000 sci-fi books in my collection and have read thousands more over the years. I WANT to see the next part of this very badly. If you could figure out how to take the sex (incest) scenes out and make it work I think you could sell this very easily.

I consider the fact that I read the full story this afternoon as testement alone to the quality produced by this wordsmith. Didn't want to wait to later to see how the story progressed, had to carry on reading. thank you.

Never thought I would read a story this long in one day.....

great story telling, great prose, and I want to be a friend of the family

Lets see what happens next.

This was awesome. I would give it ten stars if I could. Very well done!

Comments don't give this story justice. I have rarely found myself gorging on a story recently but this one was not to be ignored. Truly truly amazing.

Truly the best story I have read on literotica in the ten years or so I have enjoyed the site!

What an awesome story. Move over Game of Thrones.

As others have noted, this is by far the best story I've ever seen on Literotica. The sex is tertiary. As an occasional writer here, I'm humbled, but inspired to resume my scrawling...

This is beyond great. I have never really seen this combination of writing ability, storytelling, word-crafting and world creating combined in one story and one author. 22 pages of sheer reading bliss. I wish it was 122 pages. Is there more to the story? I would pay good money to read it. I don't know if it's allowed, but if you could post a link where I could buy your books, I would love to do that. Thank you, thank you for sharing this with us.

You've got two chapter eighteens.

It is also wonderful that you can repost your stories here again . May I request that you put a note at the start of a story if it is a repost? It sometimes distracts me when I am not sure if I have read a story before. It gives a deja vu feeling.

This story has a great deal of creativity and I really hope there is a follow up story with the battle you foretold. Thanks

Probably the most original writing on the entire site. Top marks.

Are you going to bring the rest of the series over here also?

I enjoyed this story very much. It was very imaginative and entertaining. I do have a few constructive criticisms however. There were a few too many typos for my taste. I personally felt that Boston was far too mature and eloquent for a nine year old. Finally I felt that after the conflict on the mountain, the story felt a little rushed. I do look forward to reading more of your works and look forward to future releases. Keep up the great work!

I first read this story years ago. Then one day you just removed it. I was really sad that I thought it was gone forever. But I'm glad you decided to bring it back. Now I will have to go back into my favorites list notebook and write it back down. So thanks for bringing back the great story.

WOW!!!! Took me forever to read this far and I read nothing else but this. I truly hope this isn't the end tho I haven't looked yet.

This story is something special!!! A remarkable, fascinating, extremely well crafted epic deserving to be more!!!! My "hat's off to you" for this one. Thanks again!!!!!

This addictive tale is just one example of why you should be called the "FIRST LADY" of superb stories!

I submitted the first section of book two yesterday. This is a work in progress. It will be a trilogy. Don't get impatient, please. It may take me a year or more to finish. I've got a lot of things going on right now. Thanks for reading, Randi.

Awesome story! Kinda felt like a combination of The Bonding Chronicles (PantherParabola) and Anne Rice’s “The Devil Memnoch”, which are both incredible stories.

https://www.literotica.com/s/the-bonding-chronicles-ch-01

I don't know enough about Islam but there is so much blasphemy against the other monotheistic beliefs that I was looking over my shoulder for the thunderbolt.

a marvelous piece of work.

Hi Randi,

Your imagination and storytelling skill astound me. This story is unique. You do not follow a predictable formula. Each story you post is so different from your others. I am always excited to see a new posting from you. I know I will be embarking on a new journey. Thank you for sharing.

gary

It's a bloody long drive from Sydney to Port Douglas - might have to teleport that one!

It said there was a part two. Will it be here? I can't wait. Thanks for putting it here. I've bought all your books. RPL

I've actually been looking for this story for a while now. Remembered reading it but not the title or who wrote it. Awesome work!

on this site. Have missed your stories. Thanks for this effort and the many more to come.

pappy

I enjoyed this a while back and it was

delightful to read again.

Randi has once again managed to provide a superb work of wonderfully creative and imaginative writing.

I remember reading First Estate when it was originally posted some time ago and my memory tells me the original post was not as lengthy. It seems it has been expanded considerably and all for the better.

Among all the glowing comments which are indubitably well deserved, one thing kept coming to mind which is this is just Randi's typical work. This one perhaps embodies a bit of an imaginative deviation from many of her stories but the quality of the work is just 'normal Randi' classical.

Another thing I find interesting is in this Randi addresses some religious and philosophical ideas with a very interesting perspective and structure. I must say, she provides some deep thoughts into philosophical topics for one so young; truly a brilliant and questioning mind manifest in a beautiful young woman.

My sincerest compliments on a superb piece of work which is just a 'typical Randi quality' product.

Bill

This is without a doubt the finest writing I have ever read in over 20 years on Literotica.

Spectacular so far. The weaving of Biblical theology, legend, your own ideas and a little Star Wars reference is masterful. And then reverse splicing in "The Spirit is willing but the flesh is weak", well that was just hilarious. Surely there's a book series in here to make you rich? Won't get to finish till tomorrow evening but I look forward to it.

what happens to a human male if he gets a transfusion from this guy?

Goth hooker. Brilliantly hilarious. But then on 21 you named a female baby Greyson. The juxtaposition of the brilliant and the WTF is funny in and of itself.

sex between our main character and his mom is creepy but I'm just going to put it down to they are different creatures from us and the rules are thus different. Still creepy but I'm letting it go because the story is brilliant.

there is a sequel and it's early enough at night to read it.

5 Stars

Epic

i love your story plots but do wish youd go into more detail for the children and a better account of the son and mother but overall fantastic,if you wrote books id purchase and read them all.stories about angels demons magic or ancient goddesses .and i love the main character being with multiple women and them all loving each other.id give this story far beyond 10 stars :)

Thanks so much for the delightful story you have woven. Excellent writing. Very imaginative plot. I couldn't stop reading it once I started.

A long but gripping story. Considering it in on Literotica I would have enjoyed more details about the sex. A couple facts, Australia does not have middle schools, we have cattle stations, not ranches and it would take a lot longer to get to Chistmas Island due to limited flights.VV

First off, a solid 5 in my book! Great fun and great writing! I really didn't know what to expect so was really surprised at the details and length!

Now, for some fun cut and paste commentary fun!! If it's not your thing then just skip my post :)

' "You can't tell anyone about this, please. Well, I promised Boston you would tell her, but I don't want to people looking at me as if I'm a freak. Do you think she'll think I'm creepy?" '

...now why on God's green earth would you tell a fourth grader that you're half angel, can lift cars and teleport?! Lol. The likelihood of a nine year old not letting that out from time to time is pretty low! Hehehe.

' "Jesus, Parker; warn me before you do that. You're going to make me have a heart attack." '

...so is using God's name in vein worse saying it to a half angel, or a human? Rofl.

' She had all kinds of questions to ask me, but I didn't know most of the answers. When the sidewalk was empty, I would hold her and zip us up and down the street. I showed her how I could move things without touching them. She was delighted. '

Fuck!! Didn't his mom teach/tell him to keep a low freakin' profile?! Ever heard of windows? Security cameras?! Evil dad walking around or using some of his ill gotten gains to have programs watch satellite feeds for stuff like that? Lol.

' "I will," she promised. "I broke up with my boyfriend this week. Do you think we could talk to Pastor Davis about angels? He seems to know a lot about them. Maybe he could answer a lot of our questions." '

Yeah, tip off the pastor with a bunch of weird, pointed questions, then wind up on some strange catholic 'kill the evil half breeds' watch list! Hehehe. Hey, if he can be half angel, I can have a conspiracy theory, heh. ;)

' Her butt was amazing. It was small and firm, perfectly rounded into a near shelf on top. '

I like small and firm, but if an ass has a shelf, it's fucking huge, lol! I guess some folks might get off on it, but having an ass I can sit my drink on just turns me off, hehe. You'll never get in her doggie style, haha!! Missionary your balls would be slapping her ass cheeks before you were half way in!

' Fuck me now, but go slow for a while." '

Fuck me now? Not, make love to me? It's their first time together, they can fuck later, lol. Unless it's a hookup, who says that their first time? Lol, people watch too much porn, hehe!

' "Sagan, I'm going to fuck you until you lose your voice from screaming," I told her.

She laughed. "You better get started then." '

Hahaha, thats more like it! I love her, she's too funny! Nothing like a motivated girl!

' "What happened while you were dancing? Did she make you horny? She's very sexy, Parker. She makes me horny, too." '

....a ten year old getting horny, lol. It's in the water! Literally! All the stuff making kids nowadays hit puberty way sooner than they should/would have, lol. Hell, I barely even remember being ten, other than having a crush on my fifth grade teacher hehe, well my fourth too, lol. But never occurred to my dick, I just thought they were awfully sweet and pretty! :). Now kids that age are fucking, yeesh. What's happened to our world?

' "Jesus, Parker," Boston whispered to me. "I knew we weren't going hungry, but I had no idea we were rich." '

....really, he gives her shit about saying 'damn' but not saying God or Jesus all the freaking time? These guys all have character flaws, rofl!!

' She pulled her shirt over her head and those angel boobs were in my face. Her hair wrapped me like a live thing and a bit of heaven rode me like a cowgirl. '

Rofl, that was awesome! ;)

' We got her a wedding dress and shopped for a wedding ring to match her engagement ring. '

I've never understood the whole two ring thing. It's like, damn woman! One car on your finger isn't enough?? Hehe.

' "The police! I can't imagine a more useless set of people. They are more of a danger than a help. They'd be more likely to taze us than help us. I think they must be a bunch of psychopaths, Parker. What kind of people want that job? I think they are the kids that always sat alone at lunch, didn't have any friends and they're getting back at the world now. The police!" '

....you do see the irony here, don't you? Lol. Just like the guardians and angels, there are good and bad police, and those that fall somewhere in between! Hell, my brother is a state trooper. Served in Iraq, and is a kind, patient, understanding and slow to anger person. Heh, he has to be, cause if I was in his shoes I would have throttled that psychotic wife of his early on, lol! Another older officer friend of mine, also very kind, him and his wife rescue endangered animals, treat them and find them good homes. If they shoved all those dogs and cats (a parrot or two also!) in the bedroom and you walked in, you would never know as the house is always spotless (well, pet toys;) and you can't smell anything! Not relevant but wanted to say it, hehe. I've met asshole cops, Ive met crooked cops. I get it. You just can't stay jaded.

' We did it again the next night and the night after that. I told her that we were going to a clinic in England and she was going to have a baby. She laughed and cried and we didn't get out of bed that day. '

...ok, maybe I'm missing something here... They keep talking like they need to stick a syringe up her twat to knock her up! Why the fuck isn't HE just knocking her up?? Why arent any of the girls or him saying something about that??

These people.... They have some of the most fucked up, androgynous names, ugh! It's hard to keep up with who is who, much less what sex they are!

...and we get a paragraph or two of him banging his mom, but one freakin' line about doing his little girl in the shower! Hell, the way it was worded you couldn't be sure if they did anything or he wad just waving his wang around! Lol.

Well whew!! The most amazing long story I've read on here in a few years!! I could barely put it down. Can't wait to start on the next one!! Thanks for the great story!

Waiting on sequel.

I've have had the feeling God works in many ways; as I see it. I am sort of one who knows the way of God; due to the fact I was saved by the; Virgin Mary 5 or 6 times in my life. When I was 2 years old I meet them in a water trough for cattle. You see my older brother was trying to kill me because I didn't look like him. My life in general has been in the calling as I shall put it; for helping out when people needed help. Military

came to me at age 15.5 when I was attacked by a group of people; who tried to once again kill me. 1 person against a total of 5 in the bar and 10 police officers were hurt that night. It was the dark of the moon on the 31 of October, 1971. I spent 90 days in a coma; the man who brought the attack on me spent 8 years; and 8 months; 8 days in the hospital. I was a Marine for 35 years; and assigned a group of special ops. during that time I could not go home for ten years. love your stories; and yes was married with my first wife which we had 5 children and adopted a beautiful young girl who lost her family in a fire. My code name was BEAR with the Marines. good night and happy writing.

Read this three times now for part 2

Chur m8 awsum story

Fantastic piece of work!

You write like an Angel. I love this story and this is the second time l'm reading it. I look forward to reading part 2. Thank you for bringing so much enjoyment to me.

Randi,

You continue to amaze!

What an extraordinary story! History, religion, legend and fantasy, all rolled in to an amazing story! 5*s.

Fantastic story! Looking forward for second part. Thank-you

Holy F'in Shit, that was bloody excellent

Personally, I am a religious agnostic. I believe in the possibility of a higher power, but I question the tenants of my own religion. I am a white male Protestant. Why does that make me better then a Hasidic Jew? Or a Buddhist? Or a Muslim? Those are the things that bother me. Why is my instruction manual, the New Testement better then any of the other religions. I do believe in Heaven and Hell, but only in my mind. I believe that we live in them in this life, not the hereafter and I try to enjoy my “Heaven” to the fullest. Having said all that, I believe you did a fantastic job with this story and I applaud your writing skills.

Masterpiece to the n th degree. The voting scale is way too low! I feel that I could not read fast enough to keep up with the interest generated by your story.

I look forward to Destiny's Child.

BJ

Apologies, haven't even finished the 1st page...got to the bit about the wooden pegs and I had to take a minute. Don't know if that's yours or someone elses but...mind blown. Just saying...

Amazing! Looking forward to the finale! Thanks for this!

5*

OMGosh this was such a awesome story. Getting ready for bk 2. If i get fired from my job because of all the time im reading this i will hope u feel a little bit guilty for giving me so much enjoyment.GREAT JOB N READ. thanks for all ur hard work it is appreciated.

Fascinating. Somehow I love this story. I don't howyou were inspired or guided but there is more to this path than fantasy fiction. Food for thought.

Funniest bit of narrative ever: “She muttered something about race traitors and Mom fried her with a lightning bolt. That knocked her unconscious and blew up the microwave.” I laughed out loud when I read that - kind of like something HDK would come up with.

Absolutely loved this story. Thanks for introducing us to an awesome world. Not sure if I want my wife to read this one, she will make me use some of this in our tabletop RPG.

Not what I expected, but loved it. I was a little disturbed for a while when it looked like it was going to be just another one man's harem fuck story. There's still that going on but the story has evolved beyond and is well worth reading. Looking forward to getting into the second chapter, hope it's as good as this first chapter is. Thanks

Hi Randi:

Masterpiece as I stated the first time I read this story and commented on it about one year ago. By the way, this has become and inspiration for my own story!!!

2 set of 5* end to end

BJ

1- superb story, well written. Um, were never told how parker gets all his $ at 26 yo.

2- love the quotes; " well, Dorothy"... and "theyre out in the fields smoking", "and blew up the microwave"i laughed and laughed and laughed.

3- this is interesting and well told to the point that i could almost want to believe in religion and god.

--Dont believe, but try to live my life as a christian, have sinned and expect no forgiveness as life as sucked pretty much from 20 yo., thats enuf punishment and yet we now have bidem and tyrannical democraps betraying the country, abetting the ruination and surrender of the world to other slant eyed tyrants, thinking they know best, just like the "rebel angels watchers etc, yea not. Woe to the world.

A criticism that i think is correct, lots of misuse of "I" instead of "me". Mom , english ba, has worked that error out of my speech and writing, have to say in my head "is it she and I or she and me" and "this happened to I or this happened to me". Only systematic error i found in 22 pages of excellent storytelling. thank you so much, Randi. rk

There aren't enough stars for this story. Brilliant writing.

I am impressed. I have always thought you to be a good writer and this one raises my opinion even more.

Great blend of depth, complexity and humour. Bravo.

Happy Frank

No words for how fantastic this is. Just the depth is tremendous.

Five stars.

I also love Heinlein's Stranger in a Strange Land.

What incredible imagination. Creating a scenario that is almost as believable as the stories of the Bible or gnostic books coming alive. Kudos to Author.