by Legend20002001
Many first time authors are so excited about the prospect of seeing their story online they forget they are writing a story. Your tale degenerated quickly into a mess of mismatched pronouns and verb tenses that by the end of the story was a complete disaster. Any level of erotic tension you might have built up is wasted and top that all off by the biggest rookie mistake: To Be Continued. Why? You couldn't wait to finish the scene you had to stop and ask if it was going okay? It's a horrible tease and unfortunately you are only the millionth person to make this same mistake. Welcome to being just like everyone else.
Reading this story got me so wet! The details are superb! Reminds me of a fantasy that I've had about my brother for awhile now. Can't wait to read more!
sounds like a cheap copy of another story i read here ALMOST TOTALLY IDENTICAL.
There's always some moron who reads a story and thinks they could have done it better. Possibly someone who either hasn't yet learned about the concept of "plagiarism", forgot about the concept of "plagiarism", or simply doesn't think the term "plagiarist" applies to them.
It existed before "musicians" changed a note in a song, pronounced it a completely new and original song, and insisted the old song had only been "sampled", but it's definitely gotten worse since then. For some reason, small-minded and unoriginal people seem to really "latch on" to trends that give them a chance to take credit for someone else's work.
Nothing new here..
Fun to watch a sibling getting herself off & helping her cum
Wondered if he got her computer fixed?