All Comments on 'Forces of Nature'

Anytime your name comes up, I automatically click. You are one of my favorites. Thanks for another great piece of literature.

This was an amazing story. Kudos, Myhands. Every one of your stories tear at the heart strings, and they have lots of buildup. :) Keep on writing. :)

Once again you’ve thrilled me with a superb mix of love and miniature story plots involving a revolving door of characters.

Though your submissions are few and far between, they are always well worth the wait.

Thank you for sharing.

IDB.

Wonderful interesting characters, vibrant enticing story threads.

I enjoyed the build up and pace of the relationship between the two main characters. However, since you wanted constructive criticism I would have to say that the story felt very busy at times and there were so many things going on and so much extra dialogue that at some points I had a very tough time sticking with the thread so to speak. Overall I enjoyed the story it was just a little busy for my tastes. You could have done away with the whole mother, boyfriend, friend, dad story line and I would have enjoyed the it more. I did enjoy the other characters and their story lines. Hope the criticism helps and I look forward to reading more of your writing.

This is the first of your stories that I have read and I must say it is awesome. I especially like stories that have the characters developed to be believable. I also like the "stories within the story." I will definitely read more of your stories.

You achieve a rich assortment of characters and events which gives depth to the universe of the story. Nevertheless, the story is severely weakened by these aspects I detail below:

- Lynn is always right, always good and everyone likes her. She sets her goals in changing Cheryl where other women didn't, and Cheryl gets lots of flak from everyone in the story. The romance consists in Cheryl giving up all of her ideas (forced to reconcile with her parents, no womanising) while Lynn remains exactly the same. Lynn has all the makings of a Mary Sue.

- You condemn Cheryl for womanizing publicly, while Cheryl's parents, ex BF and ex best friend shag with each other in Cheryl's face (and with both women getting knocked up) and that is downplayed, with Cheryl being scolded for cutting them all loose. I'd say the moral of the story is either broken or senseless.

- It seems a common trait to many lesbian stories that all men are slimy and/or cheats and/or stupid, and that all women are good and if they're not there must be a reason. Your story fits squarely there: the two male characters who get some screen time are Ida's husband and Cheryl's father (with the mayor being a hypocritical closeted gay man), and the only female character who is mean just happens to be a closeted lesbian who gets better when she is out. See my point?

You can write much deeper characters. Cheryl is great: she's beautiful and assertive, but she has trust issues due to a traumatic past. Judy is a fighter for LGBT rights, and even though she had a huge conflict with Cheryl, she has been able to forgive her and find herself a life with Stella.

That's good, I can buy that sort of characters. But people like Lynn are boring, unreal and detract from the story.

i have to say that this is one of the best stories i haev ever read on this site and i mean that

that was an incredible journey. Thank you for sharing it with us!!

I LOVED THIS STORY. I IS THE BEST STORY THAT I HAVE READ. THANK YOU,A FAN

My god that was an amazing story , please continue this . I need to know what happened next !

your caracters are fine just how they are, the only problem is you do not write enough of these great stories. please continue this one its one, of your best. speaking of great stories I am still waiting for the next installment of forbidden, you really left us hanging there .

Please continue! The story was amazing and I need to know what happens next!!

erotic writing about commitment in relationships. Whether the multiple commitments of Paul, Susan, and Sheila or the monogamous commitment of Lynn and Cheryl, the intent amps up the intensity. The passion you put into the story more than overwhelms the little mechanical flubs (at least for me it does).

Congrats on your new employment developments. I wish you and your wife the best (still hoping your DIY stuff worked out well). Thanks for sharing your gifts.

I do have to share somewhat in the criticism of the storyline with Cheryl's family.

I can't see how she owes them any forgiveness. Her boyfriend and best friend are shacking up with her parents, and it's HER fault that she's late getting back and they can't keep it in their pants?

She should have listened to their explanations, said thank you, and GOOD-BYE!

Didn't expect them to wait until their wedding night, but glad that they did. There are families out there like that and I don't believe Cheryl owed any of them an apology for reacting the way she did, but alas even though this is a story it is realistic. Loved it.

They nvr once said sry. Only blamed cheryl for everything. Regardless of the situation, you dont fuck your daughters boyfriend then not say sry. Only "you shouldn't have gotten home late". And I must bitch about reading that whole story about crazy fucked up relationships and endless demonic male characters, waiting for a virgin thats my age that has prolly nvr even touched herself, to experience sex with a bombshell for the first time. I was really lookin forward to it, hoping the author would really get into it. At least half as much as the twisted soap opera b4 it. You can imagine my dissatisfaction wen the short sex scene is nothing but cheryl getting eaten for the thousandth time in her life, and lynn getting a quick orgasm by having her hymen ripped 8/ ...... sry if I sound a lil sour, lol, but I thought this story had potential with the whole heartbreaker meets maiden thing. Not to mention the writer is very good, jus obviously has different opinions on things like morality and wut entertainment is desirable in stories than most ppl.

After reading some of the comments, from time to time I will add some additional information to ponder.

First off, forgiveness is not forgetfulness. The forgiveness that was required was not for the families sake but for Cheryl's sake. She needed to get rid of the bitterness that was consuming her life. As you should see, the breach is not healed and may never be healed.

Yes, the "family" was VERY selfish. I have found in my research that a lot of these open poly relationships are based on selfishness. They are never wrong for what they are doing, because if they were wrong for one thing, then they are wrong on all things. I don't personally understand that point of view, but I do recognize it. That is not to say there is not a happy and truly Poly loving groups out there that are not selfish pricks. As there is one side, there is always the other.

Lynn's intent for getting Cheryl to forgive was not based on selfishness, but selflessness. I understand that to many people this is a foreign concept. But, from someone with Lynn's background, it is the selfless act that brings peace. Or in other words Cheryl didn't need to forgive the "family" for their sake, but for Cheryl's own sake, getting rid of the bitterness and letting the love flow.

Having said all that, please understand these stories are just that. They are not dissertations on the human condition, but hopefully stories that people can connect with on a personal level. If I was to delve into the complete background and other aspects of my characters, this thing would be much longer than most people would want to sit through. So I do a lot of editing as I go, telling enough story to get the point across, but not drowning the reader in a deluge of details.

Thank you for your attention you put towards my stories. It does make me feel good to know that there are people who care enough to really look into my work. I don't expect everyone to agree with my point of view, because if they did, it would make the world a very boring place.

Thanks again

Myhands316

In 1920 my Grandfather took his fiancé home to meet his father. Two years later my Great Grandfather married her. My Grandfather never forgave them and never spoke to either party again, even though they only live 1/4 mile apart. The pain caused lasted 50 years and effected all their lives as well as their children's'.

'Forces of Nature' is the first of your stories I have read and I enjoyed it. It's always a pleasure on this site to find long stories with a slow build-up, interesting characters and the sex secondary to the plot. So many stories here are one page "Hi, my name's X, let's fuck!" tales and that takes no talent at all. So, five stars it is. But if I can offer a minor constructive criticism: for such a good writer you made some dreadful spelling errors here and there (for example, in your footnote, you write of 'presidence'---it should be 'precedence'). If spelling's not your forte, use a good spell-checker.

Lesbians,gay men,swingers,incest,underage,betrayal,love all in one story. That took a stroke of genius and I am loving your work so far please continue

the whole deal with Cheryl's parents and friends demanding forgiveness through understanding of their lifestyle is utter bullshit, if you are a swinger, fine have a none exclusive marriage but that doesn't mean you are reduced to the levels of instinctual beasts that fuck whatever is nearest and has the correct equipment. If you fall in love with your child's friends, sure, but using the 'it's all your fault for supplying the goods and you should have come back sooner as we just couldn't help ourselves' line would make my blood boil, and then to find out that they had children and that it is 'unfair' to deprive them of their older half sibling? Acceptance is one thing: it happened, I'm angry but I will not let it tarnish my life'; but to forgive? That requires admittance of wrongdoing on either or both part(s), and Cheryl did nothing wrong, nothing. Other than that I enjoyed the story tremendously.

man this is one of the best lesbian romance I've ever read. sooo good

...You should try to forgive others, for their transgressions against you. You hope that others can forgive you, for your transgressions against them.

You forgive others, not for their sake but for your own peace of mind. Forgiveness is what you do for yourself, even if the intended recipients reject receiving it from you.

You cannot dictate how other people will respond or if they will even accept your act of contrition. That is their choice.

Forgiveness does not mean that you concur with or approve of their personal choices or their actions or their lifestyle.

You especially and specifically, are not in anyway consenting to or in acquiescence with the commission of criminal activities.

You could forgive someone who committed a terrible crime against you. And still agree to the necessity of their execution by the Power and the Authority of the State. See 'Just War'.

Although I am a 72 year old straight guy, I have found your story absolutely mesmerizing! I will look at your other stories but I think this one will be hard to top.

Bob

First of all, Cheryl's parent and old friends were just unbelievable, how could they blame other people for their own lack of self- control? How late could Cheryl be late so that they "couldn't control themselves" so that it was all her fault to walk in to that? They didn't even apologize but keep blaming Cheryl and Cheryl forgave them in a flash of light? I can't understand. The whole forgiving thing is just like the God(Writer) said so and it happened.

Secondly, the whole gossip thing was a bit confusing, bunches of names popped up, it took me long enough to figure who was who. And as they occupied a lot of work, the development between Cheryl and Lynn was not enough to me. It seems there was no transition for Cheryl went from strictly no commitment to engaged(making the phone call doesn't mean willing to commit, the phone call itself was not convincing either).

Lastly, for the erotic part, I expected more, especially Lynn's first time, which is obviously quite short and simple.

amazing how the characters interlace. this is the 1st story i have read where dialogue makes up for description. the transitions are smooth. the humor was on point(Cheryl's sister). the women in the story are powerful and amazing, the cop, irs auditor, etc..

its a relateable society all in all.

my objection

the sex. Lynn's 25 yr wait and beliefs shouldn't just be summarized in two paragraphs. its not erotic, romantic or sensual . for a wedding night, you portrayed a one night stand kind of sex.

your build up was more than okay but you lost me on the climax.

A true original love story! A wonderfully written story and very original plot too! Thank you so much!

I know a couple small towns like this where everybody knows everybody else's business and i'm glad I don't live there. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this.

I'm the moral idealist lesbian...this is the first story I've read that I found relatable, and believable. Love how fleshed out the characters are written, and the backstory!

This was very well written and characterised, but the ease with which Cheryl forgave her parents switched me off the story.

Let me explain : Cheryl's entire lifestyle is based on the trauma she experienced from coming home from a trip to the store to find each if her parents shagging one of her best friends. This event clearly had a fundamental impact on Cheryl's psyche. Even if she immediately accepts the validity of Lynne's argument, it would be a pretty difficult process to go from there to accepting her patents' and her friends' choices. Yet she seems to do this at the drop of a hat, as if rebuilding her entire world-view is as easy as falling off a log. I don't buy it.

Additionally, Cheryl's parents and her two friends seem to accept no responsibility for hurting Cheryl, yet there were two aspects of what happened that really demand apologies from them. First, disclosure. Cheryl's parents really should have spoken to her about what was going on, given the potential to impact on Cheryl's life. Similarly, her two friends were having serious relationships with Cheryl's parents and didn't see fit to tell Cheryl? That's a pretty serious betrayal of trust. Second, the way in which Cheryl found out. Even assuming that Cheryl was very broad-minded at the age of 21 (something that feels unlikely given how little her parents discussed their feelings with Cheryl), it was obviously traumatic for her to see both of her parents shagging her friends - that's some serious ick factor there. And it wasn't just the fact by itself. They were supposed to be preparing for Cheryl's 21st birthday party, yet they couldn't wait until after the party to get down and dirty?! This is a clear message from all four of the people closest to Cheryl's life that getting their rocks off means more to them than ensuring that Cheryl has a good time on her birthday, and, by inference, that it means more to them than does Cheryl herself.

All four of them had some serious apologising to do to Cheryl, yet there was no hint that they were sorry for the way they treated her that day.

but people do crazy things for love like attempt to reconnect with the 'rents after they shtooped the bff and boyfriend. Plus it's a porn site, so deep character motivations are generally in the way of the nitty gritty.

Actually read ALL the comments before adding my own thoughts.

I concur with those who feel that the whole scenario involving the parents and friends could have been handled better, as I do with the whole need to forgive the debauched foursome overplayed.

It might have been better with the almost standard "my parents are homophobes" reason for the lack of familial contact.

No matter what I felt for someone, no way would I feel I was the one who had to apologise!! I would prefer to be able to look at my ugly mug in the mirror without

In real life, I have walked away from relationships/potential relationships for less. Even now, in some cases 30 years later, I know that I had real and heartfelt feelings for at least 2 people from my past, yet still feel that I did the right thing in walking away.

In one case I actually had to move almost 500 miles away to save my own sanity.

It basically comes down to Lynns way or the highway. NOT the best way to try and find your "partner".

To my mind Cheryl had nothing at all to apologise for. The four people who were supposed to love her really did betray her.

As for the rest of the story ...... BRILLIANT.

It was like a mini soap opera (and I genuinely normally hate "soaps").

It was funny, sad, emotional and everyone in the town felt realistic, from the homophobes, to the churchgoers and their double standards all the way through to those just trying to live and love.

On the whole, an enjoyable read.

Tears of joy rolling down my face and dammit that's not supposed to happen to us men, but it is and I don't care, I love this beautiful story, the whole idea of Cheryl's family thing blew my mind but never mind that, Cheryl and Lynn are beautiful together, story or not I couldn't wait for there happiness together to begin, thanks for the wonderful feeling this gave me.

I liked the story but the whole parent orgy subplot rubbed me the wrong way from beginning to end. I just felt like any conversation that took place concerning what had happened focused on the wrong thing. Cheryl's friends and parents aren't terrible people because they live a polygamous lifestyle, nor are they horrible people because they engaged in orgies. They are horrible people because they didn't care about how all this would affect Cheryl and made no effort to make sure she understood and could accept it. Cheryl might not have been in love with her boyfriend nor did she have sex with him but he was still her boyfriend. Her mother didn't care about all that... she was horny after all and wanted him so she took him disregarding how it would affect Cheryl or even having the boyfriend break up with Cheryl first. They didn't talk to her about any of this. They didn't give any hints that this was going on. They didn't even feel any guilt about any of this happening.

Once Cheryl found out they didn't try to chase after her, they didn't try to explain, they didn't try to make any of it better, they just kept at it. With their actions they told Cheryl "You don't matter, we love our lifestyle more than we love you and we're not even going to cease our sex to explain to you because of how insignificant you are to us".

When the dust settled and Cheryl contacted them again they weren't only not apologetic, they blamed her for what happened. "You stayed out too long" was their argument which is essentially saying that because she was late she deserved to walk in on them fucking, disregarding how this would affect their relationship and how this would affect Cheryl on a psychological level. Their complete apathy towards Cheryl's suffering, their willingness to let their daughter go, their stance of taking no responsibility despite their betrayal just painted them as evil, damn near sociopathic individuals. By extension this also affected my view of Lynn because of her insistence that Cheryl should forgive her parents and friends. Lynn even went as far as to say that Cheryl is just as bad as her parents or even worse.

Ultimately I think the subplot was severely mishandled because it focused on the wrong thing. It focused on Cheryl's inability to accept a polygamous/polyamorous lifestyle when what should have been front and center should have been her parents disregard, breach of trust and betrayal. It shouldn't have been a plot for Cheryl to forgive and take responsibility for what happened. It should have been a plot for Cheryl to confront her parents and air all the feelings she left unsaid all those years ago. All we got was the unapologetic ramblings of uncaring parents who could do nothing but push the blame onto their daughter and having to read as Cheryl just accepted it all and forgave them.

The 2 parts have some apologies to do. The foursome for the way they deal that situation. Cheryl wasn't late at her party, she MISSED that party. All her friends were invited and none were still there when she come home.

Cheryl want that party to get her parents together. What's she done? She's gone eating miss johansson's pussy.

At least Cheryl was succesfullat one thing, her parents are still living under the same roof. I don't like all foursome thing and all the betrayal but the 4 of them are still in love together 5 years later.

I'm not sure if Cheryl really forgive them, Susan bring the kids to Cheryl while Sheila and Paul stay at home making love. Sheila didn't want to see her daughter? Cheryl just want to meet her sibling? To me Myhands keep us in the dark so we can made our own ending, like the author's done in forebidden.

So nobody says the I'm sorry thing, Susan was there only because she was the only available person of the foresome to bring the kids to Cheryl. Cheryl seem to understand the whole better enough to see her bro and sis. Like somebody said she doesn't have to like it.

Now about Lynne, at the beginning she not even sure she's a lesbian. In the middle she admitted looking somebody she could get chemistry and trust. Her solution? Waiting the honeymoon to lose her cherry. Imagine the face of Cheryl the first morning of her honeymoon if Lynne told her finally being lesbian is not for me. What a second chapter it could be.

Sylvain

LicentiousGhoul said it better than I could.

I also didnt feel like I knew the main characters. There was so much other stuff about side and background characters. I knew Ida's character better than Lynn's, who by the end I disliked entirely.

Liked all your stories I've read so far but not this one. Sorry :(

So, I had previously rated this a 5 on my first reading some time back.

I loathed Cheryl's family. They were just plain evil. I won't explain why. It isn't worth my effort. Others have explained it well. And, unfortunately, you can already see in their behavior the next generation of that family are going to be pretty fucked up. My real question is: where was all this sociopathic behavior while Cheryl was growing up? How could people that crazy actually hide it? They clearly aren't with the kids. Why did they hide it from Cheryl? Or was Cheryl just so dumb she missed it?

Lynn was ... confusing. Exactly how can someone who has had no experience have any idea what their sexual orientation is? It would have been better to make it clear that she had no orientation; only love mattered, not gender. But she came across a bit ... scattered.

Of course, myhands said he cranked it all out in the midst of their crazy home life. So, I cut him a break and left it rated 5, because it mostly was.

The high moral standard/purity angle doesn't mesh with parent orgies involving cheating and betrayal. LicentiousGhoul is on point with their commentary.

I enjoyed the story….I wondered the ages of everyone one tho