"Forgive me Father"

i completely forgot i was supposed to talk to You this evening. i answered the door in a form fitting cookie monster short onesie and black kitty cat ears, eating a jar of sour plum candy. i stepped back and blushed a bit. "Come in Father," i stepped to the side as Your frame filled the door as i closed it behind You.

i felt smaller and You seemed so much larger than i. i crossed my feet as You greeted me, Your voice just makes warm and i feel the desire pooling in my tummy... Right desires.... i noticed You looking at me, i wonder if You can see my shame, the sudden attention makes me nervous and i run to get U/us water. You ask about my day as i set the glasses down on the table.

A part of me wants to yell and scream and cry, the other part of me wants to crawl in Your lap and feel Your hands on my skin.. Are they rough and calloused like they look, how warm are they Father? What would they feel like on my lips, on my neck, mmm on my a... The sound of You clearing Your throat breaks my thoughts and i blush again, embarrassed,"I'm sorry Da... Father, my day was fine and Yours?" The way You looked me over made me nervous, i could feel my nipples harden and I now regretted not wearing a bra like normal as You turned away and talked about afternoon mass, prayer group, i guess the normal stuff Priests do.

i went and sat down on the couch crossing my legs as You got the wine and wafer ready, You blessed it and stared at me. "Open" and i can't tell if it was an order or You asking but i obeyed. You placed the wafer in my mouth watching me and i couldn't look away. i felt Your hand graze my lip and i gasped, my tongue quickly darting out to touch the spot before taking the wine afterwards. i swear i heard You chuckle as You sat down. "Begin whenever your ready, I'm listening," You say and it feels like i got in trouble and now i have to explain myself. I took a deep breath and started the routine like normal

"Forgive me Father, for i have sinned."

"And what is the sin your guilty of?" You ask, i sat there and thought about the day what set me off, what made me regress, made me start thinking about fantasies and desires i worked so hard to push out and be normal. How after a mainly normal shift at the bar, a regular got upset practicing pool after an already stressful day.

I've never seen Him upset before but His anger was the kind of anger that made me wish I was the object He threw across the table, because Daddy is so amazingly sexy when He's angry and I like..... no love, i love feeling Sirs authority take over the room and suffocate me, it's like standing in a sauna the air gets heavy and feels like i 'm breathing in steam.

i fantasized while working, about Him and the pool table and when He hugged me goodbye, how His hands felt and might feel around my neck squeezing gently or pinching my nipples and touching my breasts, how i'd arch into His hands and moan.... I'd be more than happy to let Him take some of that anger out on me, where i wish if i spilled His drink on Him on purpose, He'd forget i'm a waitress and He's a customer and He'd spank me for being ever so careless.

i'd smile or giggle and maybe tear up or beg for more. The kind of day where i could feel the Master or Daddy or Sir in the right man if He walked by, how if i could, i would turn my body and mind into delicious submissive jelly to jar and take home. "What is the sin your guilty of sweetheart," You touched my thigh, "Please..." i moaned softly and then remembered, it's confession.

You repeated the question, but did You say sweetheart or did my desire riddled mind say it. i became aware of my breathing and the way the cool air felt on my skin only made me hotter, my nipples could clearly be seen by now thanks to my pool fantasy. "Father, i'm guilty of impure thoughts. The things that i feel behind them, the desires that come with them, the way i want or maybe need to be touched by these men."

i could feel the couch shift a little as You leaned a little closer. "These men is it multiple or just one, what are the desires that seem to drive your need to be touched that has brought you to confess this matter." It's something about the way Father is looking at me, am i imagining it, the way i'm getting sized up as He glances over my body. i'm just now realizing His hand never left my thigh and i'm now registering the heat seeping through the shorts of my onesie.

i bite my lip and look at You, i promise this time it's not in my head as i feel Your finger run over my leg side to side. i swallow and try to concentrate on answering You. "It's an aspect, a trait Father." i respond. i have to look at something else in the room because Your eyes on me is too much.

"Its little things Father that make me feel a need, a desire. The raise of a voice, the action, the authority, a look or glance, it's not a vain look either, it's something else, something that makes me want to be dominated by them, controlled, taken over and owned in every meaning of the word."

i turned my attention back to You, leaning forward on my knees a little bit. "It's not just that Father, can i say something, you promise im safe and i won't be in too much trouble for it."