All Comments on 'Fortune'

I have met few villains here at Literotica I hated more than Stella, what a truly hateful person.

It's the mark of a great writer, being able to convey such visceral reaction from their readers, so thank you for this.

Willie

There are many wives on lw that have done worse than Stella, it's how Oshaw paces his story and takes the time to delve into the husband's pain that sets the story and the characters apart. Brilliant stuff.

..........at how brainless and annoyingly pathetic the lead is. Literally fucks up consistently in situations that are avoidable each time; emotionally incontinent; a sucker for pussy and what's left of his brains drained out his balls; and likes to be abused.

What. The. Fuck. Can you please try write about an actual average, normal functioning male instead of a broken and retarded cry-bot? Jeezus!

Great story, hopefully you will making more stories like this again oshaw

Kids three presents away and left them in trash what an asshole donate them to a suitable charity for kids who don't get presents at all

Get screwed one time your fault twice my fault

Kids did finally learn hurt they had put on dad but how took so long after twins should have got a hint

Generous 3 stars

Beyond my control. my life go's on ,

mistakes I've made still haunt me ,in my dreams into my waking life . which means I have no life . I can only go forward I can't change the past or the future

loved your story , truth is better than the dreams I've had

About as useless as a poopy-flavored lollipop.

only 4 stars, because if there was ever a wife that truly deserved wrath, punishment, karma, etc. it was Stella and this 7 page story really just whimpered on that. Her demise should have felt like we were watching it in slow motion. ;0)

Incomplete.

1)The evil, vicious, cheating slut Stella seemed to get off without too much pain, except what she does to herself by overeating. She needed a lot more.

2) The asswipe Ted just gets taken for his money and businesses.(Except for the beating his gold digger's boyfriend administers!) He deserved much, much more.

3) The children could have been lectured a bit on their self centered, heartless behaviour. They enjoyed the easy living with first one parent and then with the other, even though their first choice turned to ashes.

4) Were there no Nuptials in John and Gayle's future? No children together?

5) From log recovery from the river bed to farming. What of the first business? No more recovery of logs?

An extension to an 8th page, while the above issues were addressed, would have rounded off this story and gained an unequivocal 5*s.Now? Downgraded to 4*.s

I saw the others here being too harsh on a good story. What they fail to understand is that real life hardly ever works out like in fairy tales.

You've written a very believable and amazing story and Stella having her life ruined and stuck with a bunch of kids from a douche bag is exactly what she deserves.

Really great story, hope to read more from you soon :)

You're not even in the same stratosphere as the Unoriginalist. In fact, this piece of shit should have been sent right to the recycle bin.

This is a story of the destruction and near death of a good man. It was wonderful seeing him rise from the ashes and build a good life.

I also love the life lessons you imbued the protagonist with, who walked the walk and taught his kids.

You punished Stella perfectly.

Good job!

This was a mostly believable story and the characters were quite authentic. The kids’s realization as to the pain their mother.....and they.....caused was extremely well presented.

This was an unusually well done story. 5 stars.

A wonderful thing or as they say, a bitch. Try to do the right things, live as well as you can and let the betrayers rot in their own scat. Unless you've lived most of this story you may not understand, at least Ted apparently wasn't a child molester. For some of the small details that are glossed over a reader sometimes has to use a little imagination, very good story, well told. Signed: BTW

This came up on the latest comments list, so I gave it another look.

I can suspend disbelief for a lot of the legal mumbo-jumbo, but I simply can't by the "respect your mother" bull shit when she is deserving of NONE.

Great story of karmic justice. Screw you Stella.

worthy of 5 stars. The only issue I take is the denseness and sheer naivety/stupidity of the main character during his divorce and getting husband-raped by his EX (from here on out only known as Skankzilla) and the courts in every facet including the fake charges of abuse against Skankzilla and the kids.

In fact, what man, returning home early and seeing an unknown car parked in his driveway wouldn't go into the house to investigate??? From this point on his character did everything wrong and essentially "gave up" on everything including his kids. I mean, c'mon, even the most retarded liberal court and judge would require actual PROOF of mental and physical abuse. But yet, his lawyer nor himself did him any favors.

Once the story clears all the silliness of him continually falling for the "finger in the chest and when you look down you get slapped in the face" gag with her easily manipulating him into breaking the restraining order. No issue of how the cops were right on the scene to arrest him at the restaurant? Text messages from her stating her desire to meet with him only to have him arrested for breaking the order would have held up in court and sent HER to jail and not him. Those Restraining Orders do work BOTH ways. The main hearing for an RO would have required a ton of evidence to prove he was a danger but yet that never happened? It's a bunch of goofy little issues like this that can doom a great story but Oshaw was able to transition rather quickly away from it.

It's a shame Oshaw only wrote for a couple of years as most of his stories are really good and rated as such.

I loved it. Stella, evil to the bitter end. But I love the main character's sense - he may have made a few mistakes by being naïve, but he trusted this lady who had been his wife for so long. We can all be lulled into a false sense of security. It was also very much in his decent nature to insist they respected their mother. She was weak. Not him. She was the one who gave into all temptation and the lost dearly. He still had all his morals in the right balance. Well done! Loved it.

Still like it! A lot! Thanks!

...marry a woman named Stella. Don't marry her. Don't date her. Don't buy her a drink. Don't even talk to her. There is only regret.

That have the protagonist act so stupid.

I really love stories with good Karma for the husband, and really bad Karma for the cheating slut!!!

You seem to feel that the "karma" approach (i.e. they were bad people so eventually bad things happened to them) as a resolution for the evil acts of Stella and Ted is sufficient, but it sure isn't satisfying. Without some sort of retribution, our hero is still a wimp and a victim. It doesn't have to be over the top, but he does need to reclaim his manhood somehow.

Our hero had no hope. Karma saved him. End of story.

I am not one for BTB, so this is okay.

But, this story just goes on and on and on without really entertaining.

It really revolves around the first three phrases in this comment.

A poor job of writing, an even poorer job of entertaining

I'm not sure what planet you live on, but research the law a bit more.

What a disaster, followed by a Phoenix rising out of the ashes, and then love. Rich, glorious love! Well done.

AnonymousinRed, you behave like a troll.

What a wonderful story. It rises to the top beside a select few.

Excellent, thank you.

I liked the action and characters - all great.

Also @ AnonymousInRed is a little bitch.

2nd read. Just as good as 1st. Don't think I rated it 1st time. 5*

Maybe some explanation for why she acts the way she does would do well?

Was it just his wealth? If so, I feel even more cynical about everything now...

Gave 5 star but not satisfied with the outcome, would have liked the snake Lawyer on a long prison term with the bitch wife Stella regretting and praying for forgiveness, and the little selfish imps should get more punishment. They should feel the pain of actual abuse that they with their devilish mom falsely accused their father.

Hey Folks! I cant remember if I commented before?..Fantastic Story...I would have loved to see Stella and the Asshole that fucked her cop a far measure of Revenge.

But over all I loved it 5 Stars ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Biggest omission (IMHO) was for Oshaw to not name Sweetie1 (Stella) even being at her son’s graduation. The only hint was to identify Steve as her son, but that was several years after Sweetie2 became Mommy to her step-kids. It was also several years after Sweetie1 screwed up enough at Xmas to never be visited nor invited to visit the kids.

There was a least one awkward flashback where the same type of misfortune befell Hubby at what felt like several years apart. But, then, Hubby DID accept her request to meet her at the restaurant, got badly burned, then answered her text.

Wonderful the story reasonable happy ending. I though that perhaps Gayle's last word may have been "I want some babies."

Question anybody know the about the reference at the story start to "HDK's story of the dissolution between a husband and wife stirred all of Literotica."???

I believe the story you're asking about is "Yesterday", written by HDK. I don't know about the 'stirring all of Literotica' part, the story is okay, but most didn't like where he left it.

The last words should have been Gayle saying She was pregnant . Great Story

I didnt like his kids at all, they just seem like brats. On top of that his son being infatuated to the woman his dads banging is creepy. Its a shame he didnt have kids with Gayle, they would of had some good offspring.

surprised that you didn't take them to child service your ex . They would have been charges filled for unfit mother or even to police after she admitted the false charges false police reports.

seem to be obsessed with a demented conception of chivalry. How Oshaw could put this in the mouth of his wronged husband is bewildering: "Both of you better understand right now, Gayle is just as worthy of respect as your mother is and I will not tolerate any rudeness to her."

Their mother destroyed their family, abused the legal system to try to destroy their father, alienated them from their father, and put them in a situation that damaged their characters. SHE is worthy of respect? What nonsense. Women are only due the respect they have earned. The bitch isn't due respect for simply having borne them. What she did was inexcusable, and there is no possible "equivalence" between the bitch and Gayle. Some women are worthy of respect, and some aren't.

What goes around comes around. Nice story, keep writing.

He was very magnanimous when he told the children their mother deserved respect. I think he didn't want them hating her because of the way he had been hurt. Hate is on of those wasted emotions that solve nothing. Hate only drags you down it really has no effect on the person being hated unless you are in their face or beating them to death. Has someone hurt you? Don't associate with them any more.

As fairy tales and escapism goes, this is as good as it gets. Life is never this accommodating in righting wrongs, nor are parties squeaky clean as the MC.

I guess it's a question of what you want out of Lit. Some people want stroke while others want escapism and perfect answers.

This in no way detracts from the author's writing style, which is first rate.

A great story of what's goes around comes around. Definitely a 5 star rating for the story. Five star 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

Great story with a lot of comments pro and con. I just really like the story.

Nice one great read

I must’ve read this story a dozen times and I still don’t tire of reading it. Wonderful story and cannot believe anyone could have a negative comment about it. Thanks for your contribution.

THEY ARRESTED HIM FOR VIOLATING...........

A restraining order at the restaurant. How could the police have been previously called to arrive simultaneously with him? The judge or the entire judicial system ok'd someone they had, without any evidence, identified as a sexual predator. I guess all my problems with this story have to do with the judicial proceedings.

My God you are a writer and then some !!! I’m truly not used to having watery eyes reading erotica , but this story was one for the record books ! You are an amazing storyteller and I plan to read the rest of works . If they’re half as good as this one I won’t be disappointed!

Excellent story, beautifully written and almost believable (the arrest in the restaurant and the Court's refusal to see the evidence that Stella texted him first, e.g.).

I'm not a big fan of BTB but Stella deserved a one way ticket to hell.

LA

Loved the story, but a quick q about the foreword : Does anybody have an idea of what story the first paragraph is talking about? It mentions a work by "HDK" being adapted by "Unoriginalist" any idea what stories this is referring to?

4 for this one. The only criticism I have is the long, agonizing, protracted parts where the bitch and her scumbag cheating lawyer dragged him through the legal system - way too much detail. I really liked the idea of dragging old timber up from the river beds. It is much more interesting than recycling old barn boards.

Re: Chairfan

I would suggest you start with the original mentioned, Harddaysknight's 'Yesterday'. Then read go to TheUnoriginalist's 3 Chapters of 'A Boilerplate Rendering'. Fair warning here, those 3 Chapters are brutal in parts to read. Hope this helps.

I'll say this, I miss Oshaw. Signed: BTW

Gayle, Hon, there are no Texas Aggies, just as there are no Texas Red Raiders or Texas Bobcats. There are Texas A&M Aggies, and Texas Tech Red Raiders, Texas State Bobcats, and TEXAS LONGHORNS. Gotta know your own name, and place. Smile...

That out of the way, I enjoyed my third reading over the years as much as the first two. Great story, and all the Bs got burned!

Great writing, happy endings. Also, lots of vengeance, satisfying unspeakable hurt feelings. Understandable, but i wonder, especially with the collateral damage of said vengeance (Ted & Stella's kids for instance), whether you've yet reached the point of forgiveness.

Each 'bad' person was once a kid, forced to develop personality treats necessary for plain survival under usually less than ideal circumstances, in which they never had a choice..

Stopping a moment, just to think of that, might help with the pain you obviously were still feeling while writing your excellent stories.

Another thing. Being a woman is like being black: whatever hell hole your life as a white male seems to be, rest assured it 'd be much worse if you were a woman, black, or both. You might consider that for a moment when you sentence your 'perpetrators'.

Absolutely great writes, tx

This was a good one.

5 stars

Second time reading this & it seemed even better.

Good grammar, good story with no absurdities to ruin it.

A good, solid 5 stars.

Bill

5 Stars, will be one of my favorites

Fuck this shit. The children and the mother play with the feelings of this man and all that happens to them is nothing (for the children) and getting fat (for the mother)? Fuck this shit!

Did he ever marry Gayle?

A favorite story, would love to see new stories but at least hope oshaw is still out there somewhere.

somewhere east of Omaha

This is one of my very favourite stories and a beautiful and emotional tale. Thank You 5***** and worth MUCH MORE! The only thing I would have added is a heap more pain on the nasty bitch 'Stella' as no amount of pain and suffering is too much for a woman(or man) that inflicts that much unnecessary suffering on a spouse and corrupts her children so badly. Death by stoning wouldn't be too harsh although I do not support that evil practice anywhere generally.

Great story. The only disappointment was he got no personal retribution with Teddy.

Since they haven't had or spoke of having children, can we guess after her rape she couldn't have any? Or is that waiting in a part 2 to the story? Great story! Yes ! To often we take another's attitude without knowing where the pain comes from . Two souls that needed to heal and find love.

Once....JUST ONCE...I'd like the "protagonist" lose it and buy a .45 and empty 2 clips into both the ex-wife and the interloper!!!!

Best of all Ohaw stories.

Very good story, prime example of "what goes around comes around", sooner or later!!

Great job OSHAW!

Loved it, well written and a great story.

Sad that women that cheat dont care what it does to their children.

A friends wife ran off with her boss, abandoning school aged kids.

As adults not a one of them has been in a lasting relationship, they dont trust womens commitments.

Just like their mother taught them.

Very good! I loved the the end quote from The Eagles too! Thanks!

Eagles for the win!!!

Ok... Oshaw for the win but the Eagles ref was an awesome cherry on top!

Too much telling instead of showing. Most importantly ALWAYS write out dialogue, don't just tell the reader that a character said something, show it.

Why the heck would he insist on the children being respectful to their mother, a woman he hates more than anyone else?

I worked around that country. And met through a friend, a couple guys that came by and drank coffee with us on break one day. Don explained they had been dirt poor but had got rights to a bayou that had a whole raft of cypress logs, they got well in a hurry.

I opened the story and saw it was 7 pages. I figured I would read a little and decide if I would read the rest. Then I found I was near the end of page 5. I was upset - I was so into the story I was hoping for at least 5 more. This will be one of my favorites for a long time!

You could have ended the with children for gayle and john.

Nicely done.

Better keep an eye on Steven and Carol. They spent too much time with Stella and Ted being their role models so trust is something they don't deserve until they prove they can make intelligent life decisions. Now they have a father who wants to erase the painful past and might be too generous.

i agree with anonymous I would have liked to see more kids for them . but understand why you didnt since his kids were thrown out by there mother for the same thing . great story five star

My second time through this fine story, Oshaw! Love it!

Try to get the song lyrics right. "you can spend all your time making' love, you can spend all your love making time". Otherwise, good story except wife deserved much more retribution.

Fuck those kids. Disown 'em and see how they like being wards of the state. After all, it's not like he was their real dad, right?

Excellent story and ending

An interesting and unusual tale 5*

Great story. By being an honest hard working man he fell into a great business and a new love. Not reality, but a nice story.

Great story. Hardworking father succeeded and bych ex got hers. I can relate

nicely done made me laugh a couple times and tear up at others, atypical for the genera some things a bit too foreshadowed i think but all and all wow going to scheck out more of your stuff

Wow, what ungrateful little bastard children!!

Since this my third read of this tale I guess It's worth at least 5 stars. I can't quite feel for his troubles but they do keep me attentive, I can't help feel he is a hell of a fish - but then so am I! Thanks for the story, it's darn good reading.

An excellent story even after my third read. Someone mentioned ungrateful children and my response is what do you expect with the way they were treated by their mother and the asshole she married. We are all a product of our environment and the role models were are exposed to. Some of us get over the bad ones and others do not. Keep writing OSHAW, Please!

Excellent story!

One tiny niggle, and I hate to be 'Captain Pedantic'...buut there is no such car as a '1964 Ford Mustang' - there is however a 1964 1/2 Ford Mustang.

Overall 10/10!!!!!

Totally agree with dgfergie. Kids are the product of their genes and environment. for five important years they saw/heard a crappy side of life. LP

Seriously? He's stupid enough to text her back after getting arrested the first time? Too bad he's already passed in his DNA, huh? We need less stupid in our gene pool, not more...

Garbage story imo. Kids were spoiled shits. Made a comment about a trailer then Saw the huge house and wow. Then gives him a car. Stupid and weak man you made the MC to be. Not worth rating.

Personally the kids and wife should have been told to get fucked as this is the 10000th same story on this site.

I don't agree with CHUCK2468. The story seems 'true' enough to me as I've heard of similar broken marriages with kids that go off the rails and don't have good role models (says a man married 39 years to a lovely woman).

Great story, I love it when a good man overcomes the shabby treatment from someone he loved and finds a better option. 5 stars.

Nice story.

All the story about the gold digger seemed out of place. Stella leaving with a blurred photo should be enough.

Did Gayle marry and they have new children?

This needs more...

The characters of the children were horribly constructed. They put off the story which was constructed very well till the point of introduction of his kids. After that it went downhill and didn't fit well.

The last 2-3 pages of the story really put me off.

It could have been way better. Alas! a shame