All Comments on 'Fortune Teller'

Abrupt ending was abrupt

..but i kinda feel like you stuck the landing. i mean a few thousand more words to give the reader a few hints to some of the questions we're still asking at the end would've been nice. like: was it all bullshit or did they save the world? how did they save the world? what happens between the siblings after this?

none the less a very enjoyable read. please keep writing.

i gave it 4 stars.

As I said in the title I love the idea but I feel like the story would have been a little better with some tweaks. You setup the sister as being naive and gullible which is fine, but you also setup the brother as being more grounded and less able to be manipulated.

However, the moment the fortune teller gives her reading the brother seems to believe it as much as the sister, or seems rather more open to it than I would have expected reading the initial few paragraphs. I think it would have been better if the sister fully believed the reading and the brother didn't, and the sister started trying to seduce her brother, with her brother having full knowledge of why she is trying to seduce him.

That isn't to say I did not like the story, or that you are not a good writer, in fact you are very good, I just would have preferred more conflict between the brother and sister rather than them immediately agreeing having sex is a good idea.

It would be presumptuous to ask for a second part, so I won't! Great story!

Definitely need more parts - trip back to witch, long term effect of relationship, etc. Lots of possibilities. Well written as long as there is a follow-on, otherwise it was an abrupt ending. I'll go with 5* for now with option to rescind it if there isn't more...

Hot story, more more more please. Will they fall in love and make babies in the future

I love your stories and especially this one. If I had a criticism it would be that this one needs more parts. A trip back to the tarot reader and some follow up. Where does their relationship go?

Fucking amazing!

Love this story. One of the best I've ever read

So very hot. I actually read the third part fist and can't wait to read part two.

Great story

Had me hard and horny.

Can’t wait for the next chapter with the Fortune Teller.

Amazing hot sexy story, can’t wait to read more. Must visit a fortune teller soon.

Nice slow development.

it was a great story

I loved the slow but steady progression, the character development. You have a talent for the detailed descriptions. cant wait to read the others

thank you

I enjoyed this quite a bit. Nice set up and story. Good slow burn. The sibling relationship was well handled. I would have liked something about averting troubles, and maybe a follow up visit to the fortune teller but as it stands it's a lot of sexy fun. Wouldn't mind another chapter or two following up on what happened in the this story.

I knew this fortune teller once upon a time. He was a little person like Billy Barty...you know...he was both a dwarf and a fortune teller. Well, sadly the little guy made some bad decisions. He got caught shoplifting one day and the house detective arrested him. But before the police could make it out to the store and haul him away to jail, he managed to escape!

-

So they ended up issuing an A.P.B. that said they were searching for a Small, Medium at Large!

lol

Good story and this needs another chapter in my opinion,, the morning after and a follow up to the fortune teller ,, so is this a one and done or do they continue