Friend Zoned

Another truck dove into their shelter and pulled up alongside Roxie's truck. "There's your weapons guys," she said.

The other truck's driver door slid back and a fellow leaned out, "are you Wedge Donovan?" They leaned across the open gap and shook hands. "Jimmy Scholes, I'll be training you startin' Monday. You best have your head out your ass, you're my replacement." Then Jimmy gave him a weird look, "What'r you doin' over there with Roxie."

"She's prettier than you and smells a whole lot nicer," grinned Wedge.

The rest of the conversation was spent laughing at Wedge. They went to MOPP Condition 1 which meant that they had to put on their "Protective Over-Garment," an uncomfortable, charcoal lined pair of pants and jacket that went over their uniforms and under the flack vest. The first time you put it on is a bit tricky and the pants are difficult to get over your combat boots. Roxie and a whole truckload of bomb loaders got a good chuckle watching Wedge put it on for the first time in years. Roxie slid hers on like a second skin and it was a bit of a disappointment because it covered up Roxie's nice round butt and hid her breasts which were big enough so even their frumpy uniforms couldn't hide them.

"By the way," said Wedge, "who was that officer we were talking to?"

"Colonel Walker? He's the new squadron commander." After that, talk was impossible, the shelter they were parked in rang with the sounds of gunfire and explosions. The base security forces had an exercise attack in progress and everyone on base went to MOPP4 and put on their gas masks. At the same time the F-16's roared off the runway in full afterburner, the sound echoed off every building on base. Thirty-two shrieking little bastards clawed their way into the sky looking for something to kill.

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The exercise ended on Thursday evening which meant all day Friday was spent cleaning up and putting the equipment away, maybe fix a few broken airplanes and it gave Wedge time to attend a lot of briefings. He even remembers being briefed by a doctor that the best you can do is ensure that your Korean meal downtown was deep fried, because bacteria won't survive a bath in 350° oil.

"How was your meeting with Colonel Walker?" Roxie asked Wedge. They had filled bowls with all kinds of ingredients and were standing in line at the NCO club waiting for their chance to hand their mix over to the cooks.

"He was intense. I guess the weapons flight on the previous rotation was weak and the thirty fifth took the commanders trophy. He let me know that he was going to be keeping an eye on me." Unlike other overseas assignments in the Air Force, Kunsan was one year, so people rotated in and out regularly. Each group was known as a rotation, and the fighter wing kept track of these rotations.

Roxie gave him a smile as their bowls were turned out on to the large round grill and the cooks went to work. "You didn't beat him up, did you?"

"I don't go around beating people up."

"Why not?" she said, "you're big enough," and she gave him a hip bump.

"I'm a lover not a fighter and besides, he's my commander, he makes sure I get paid."

"Lover?" Roxie acted surprised. "I don't see no woman on your arm, and you only have one picture hanging in your room."

"That's my sister."

"Kinky!" Roxie gave Wedge a wicked grin, that he shook his head at. They got their meals and headed back to their table. "What are you doing this weekend?"

"I don't know, what is there to do on the weekend around here?"

"Go shopping."

"Do I look like a guy that enjoys shopping?"

"Everyone enjoys shopping, come on, it'll be fun."

Wedge really wanted to re-arrange his room and read a book, but he really enjoyed spending time with Roxie, so he wasn't too surprised when he heard himself say, "Sure."

The next morning was a typical Korean morning, it was still. There wasn't a puff of a breeze, fog rolled in off the yellow sea and the peaceful silence almost screamed, "Get back in bed!" Korea is known as "The Land of the Morning Calm," and it lived up to its name. After a couple of pop-tarts, Wedge stepped out into the hall and tapped on Roxie's door. She opened the door with a toothbrush in her mouth and waved him in, then she leaned over her sink and finished brushing her teeth.

"Where are we going shopping? I need a griddle," he asked.

"We're going downtown but get your griddle in the BX when you get your bike." Soon they were at the NCO club waiting for a bus that would take them downtown to Gunsan city.

Soon they were on a comfortable bus and heading downtown. As they passed through the Korean countryside, Wedge saw things he never saw before, terraced rice fields, fishermen setting up fish nets in small ponds, farmers cultivating the edges of the road and ditches. They saw small villages that had a wall around them like a medieval fortress, and everything seemed new and alien to Wedge. Roxie wasn't going to admit that it was new and alien to her too, she's only been here a month and a half longer than Wedge and her experience set her above him.

At some point during the journey their hands touched, and Roxie said, "Don't be getting ideas so quickly, I'm bringing you along as a shopping cart."

"I can live with that," lied Wedge. He was really starting to like her, but she efficiently slammed the door in his face. He slid into a funk and turned to the window, ignoring the dark-skinned beauty at his side. He watched a "frog sticker" (it's what the American GIs called a Snowy Egret) picking the shallows of a rice paddy looking for breakfast. Wedge was a big, strong man. He wasn't handsome, but he wasn't ugly, his features were rough, he was described once as a well-dressed steel worker. Women gravitated toward him because he could do things for them from changing a flat tire to moving a couch. His last girlfriend took him to a party and introduced him to her friends as her personal moving company. He left the party quietly and she didn't notice for hours.

"Come on Wedge, suck it up, this is not the first time you've been friend zoned," he told himself. "It won't be the last time either, so pull your head out of your ass and enjoy the day."

Roxie knew that she, as a woman, was a rare commodity on Kunsan Air Base, but she didn't show it. For the lonely American GI there were a few enlisted females on base, most of them were married. There were plenty of Korean women around, but they didn't speak English very well, other than, "You buy me juicy?" When Roxie first got to Kunsan she had a small cloud of black guys hanging around her, watching her every move. Soon fights broke out over who's bitch she was, and a white co-worker was threatened and told to keep his hands off "their bitch." The next day at role call the cloud of her "owners" were standing on the sidelines waiting for her to finish. Some of them didn't even belong in the building.

"Sergeant Dawson, do you have anything?" asked her NCOIC.

"Yeah! I just want you people to know, I'm not anyone's bitch, and you mutts sniffin' around, you ain't got a hope in hell because there's one thing that I want that you ain't got, a pussy!"

Roxie wasn't a lesbian, she just wanted to be left alone and not treated like someone's bitch. But she wasn't insensitive either, she realized she said something that hurt Wedge. "Hey," she said as she elbowed him. "You ok going shopping with a lesbian?"

Lesbian? Wedge's ego took a strange leap when he heard her say that there was no pressure, she was one of the guys, a gal pal. A buddy... with tits. Very nice tits but since there was no chance that he would ever get his hands on them he relaxed. "Yeah, let's go find you a Ford Ranger."

"Fuck you!" she chuckled and dug an elbow into his ribs which he returned. A buddy! She missed having a buddy like her brother who stuck up for her. When she "came out" Josh Gravely in the weapons flight stood up for her and has been a friend ever since, now there is Wedge. "You remind me of my brother," she said as they relaxed.

"Was he an inarticulate ugly white guy too?"

"You're not any of that... well, white, but no he was big and handsome too. Football player. Do you play football?"

"I did," said Wedge. "I made the base team at Ramstein and played until I trashed a knee."

"What position did you play?"

"Tight end," he said.

"Appropriate," she said grinning. He usually wears floppy sweats, jeans, or BDUs, but she could tell...

The bus stopped on a busy metropolitan street and let everyone off. It didn't look like a shopping district, unless you were shopping for a Korean lawyer. "Come on!" and she led him down a few streets, then down a few narrow alleys. He started to notice odd things, like five- and ten-gallon aquariums filled with squirming eels in the stores.

"What's with the eels?"

"They love eel," said Roxie. "They even make wallets an' shit out of their skin." They turned a corner, and they were in an area that was packed with little shops and a few larger stores that catered to the American military man and woman. Shoe stores abounded, all selling knockoffs of high price brands. Wedge was admiring a pair of running shoes until Roxie pointed out the brand name: Nikee. All the shoes had a misspelled brand name, Wedge's favorite was LE Gaar.

They went from shop to shop and found several shops that would embroider anything they could stick in the machine. Wedge started with a Wolfpack hat with his name embroidered on it, then on to a leather shop. Leather of all kinds, from biker jackets to elegant leather overcoats. Another shop had all kinds of leather shoes and boots. While Roxie tried on pretty women's shoes, Wedge tried on a nice-looking pair of cowboy boots. "You a cowboy Pennsylvania?" Roxie asked.

"Wednesday night is Country Night at the club. Want to go dancing, Florida?"

"I don't line dance."

"I don't either, I prefer proper dancin', like a two-step, or a fox trot, or waltz. Come on, let's find you some boots."

"Ain't no such thing as a black cowboy," she said as Wedge found her a pair of boots.

"A third of cowboys were black, and another third were Mexican," said Wedge as pulled on a pair of boots.

"You don't see that in the movies."

"Well, 100% of westerns were produced by white guys who thought that the "wild west" meant Mulholland Drive after ten PM. How do they feel?" He held her hands and helped her to her feet. Her hands felt warm and perfect in his.

"They feel funny."

"You'll get used to them," and they headed out to other shops wearing their new boots so "their feet could get broken in." They had a lunch of delicious bulgogi, spicy beef with sticky rice, at a tiny café followed by a chance to sit down in a Korean coffee shop and talk with Korean college students that were learning to speak English. They walked together for miles up and down narrow alley ways and eventually ended up at the waterfront where Wedge watched the fishing boats move in and out of the harbor in fascination.

"You ain't never seen a boat before, Pennsylvania?" Roxie asked.

"Not like this, Florida. I've seen lake freighters on Lake Erie, but this is cool."

"How did you know that I'm from Florida?" she demanded.

Josh Gravely told him but Wedge wanted to play. "You talk in your sleep."

"What? Fuck you!"

"Don't worry... you only talk when you're not snoring."

"Fuck you all to hell! I can find another shopping cart whenever I want!" Roxie demanded as they walked back toward the shopping center elbowing each other and giving each other hip bumps on the way. Roxie stopped at a bakery and found a roll that she bought for Wedge, and they continued their walk back to the bus stop eating what looked like dinner rolls to Wedge.

"This is delicious! Sweet and fluffy, what's this red stuff in it," asked Wedge.

"Red bean paste. They're crazy about this stuff here."

There was a large crowd waiting for the bus at the bus stop. A combination of Americans and Koreans. The Koreans lined up next to the building and squatted down, it almost looked like they were sitting on the ground. "My knees ache just looking at that," said Wedge.

"When you live on the floor you learn to do stuff like that," said Roxie. "I went to a Korean's apartment, and they sit on the floor. The floor is heated and it's kind of nice."

"Kind of nice?"

"It's like... linoleum with a foam backing."

"Whoa, too weird for me. What were you doing in a Korean's apartment?"

"A Juicy girl picked me up and tried to come on to me," said Roxie with a sly grin.

"What's a juicy girl?"

"I'll teach you all about them next Friday."

Soon the bus pulled up and folks piled on. Wedge and Roxie were lucky to get a pair of seats together and they stuffed their treasures in the overhead rack then sat down and settled in. They were still in the city when Roxie went to sleep, her head on Wedge's shoulder. It felt nice with her leaning on him, sleeping like a child, depending on him for support and knowing she'll get it. Wedge thought that it's been a long time since something like that felt so right.

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Sunday morning Wedge went over to the BX and bought a bicycle, a black Huffy 15 speed mountain bike that he added a headlight, rear cargo fender and folding saddle baskets, making it look just like 2,000 other bikes on base. He added some gold (not yellow) reflective tape to several parts of the frame, and he figured he'd be able to find it in a blackout. He had a microwave coming in his hold baggage, so he also bought an electric kettle, and a griddle. After a ride around the base, he parked his bike in the 'carport' under his dorm and locked it up, then went back to his room and opened his other purchases. He was allowed to have the microwave in his room, but the kettle and the griddle were not allowed so he hid them in his locker until they were needed. He did not have a meal card, he was paid extra for food and not authorized to eat in the chow hall, he had to provide his own meals, so he got some bacon, some eggs, a loaf of bread and a few frozen hamburgers. Then he sat down and opened a book. It was then he realized that he should have bought a radio too.

A bit later, feeling peckish, he knocked on Roxie's door, but she didn't answer. He suddenly felt very alone. They were just buddies, there was nothing between them at all he kept telling himself, but he still felt incredibly alone. It was his first truly Roxie free day and he felt empty and lost.

Not being able to concentrate on the book he was trying to read, he remembered a sign he saw hanging at the rec center. It was a request for volunteers at MARS, the Military Affiliate Radio Service, to help patch phone calls back home which got him thinking of going over to the MARS shack and seeing what volunteering there would look like when a knock came at his door. He opened it and a guy, and a girl were standing in the hallway holding Roxie up, she was clearly drunk. "Is this yours?"

"If she's available, I'll take her," said Wedge.

Slowly Roxie's bleary eyes opened, and she cried "Wedgie!" She threw her arms around his neck and limply hung from him. "I think I'm a lil' drunk... do you think I'm a lil' drunk Wedgie?"

"I'll take it from here," said Wedge as Roxie hung limply from his neck.

"She got into the Soju, it's pretty potent."

"I was at the hospital hooch," Roxie slurred. "They're my friends at the Hospital Hooch."

"What is Soju?" Wedge asked.

"Mmmm... best guess is Korean rice vodka. It mixes with everything," said the woman who handed Roxie's purse to Wedge. "Need any help?"

"No, we're good, thank you."

"Is this her room?" asked the guy who gave Wedge that glare that officers like to use. He sucked at it so he's probably a lieutenant trying to perfect The Glare.

"No, she's my suite mate. I'll try to sober her up then get her back to her room next door."

"Thanks guy," said the woman.

"Thanks Wedgie," said Roxie and she started giggling. Then she said, "Take me home Wedgie." When the door was closed, Wedge ducked, slipped an arm behind her knees and scooped her up. "Sho romantic," she said, her pretty dark brown eyes spinning around. "Wanna know a secret? I don't date white guys."

"Because you're a lesbian?"

"You're funny. I'm not lesbian, who told you I was lesbian?"

"Everybody."

"Oh." Roxie acted like that was a surprise to her.

"So why don't you date white guys?" Wedge asked.

Roxie thought about it then finally said, "I don't know, but there's got to be something wrong with them if I don't date them."

"That sounds reasonable." He laid her down on his bed, pulled her shoes off, then pulled a soft, cozy mink blanket over her.

"Give me a ni-night kiss," she pleaded.

"I don't know," he said, "You're awful..." but she looped her arm around his neck and pulled him to her. Their lips met and they kissed, not a hot passionate kiss but a sweet, slightly sloppy kiss. It was the first kiss in a long time for either of them. When their lips parted Wedge whispered, "thank you, that was sweet," but Roxie was already asleep.

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When she woke up, she looked at her watch, it was six AM, they had role call at seven! She rolled out of bed, completely disoriented. Reaching for the reading lamp over the bed she realized she was in Wedge's room. Wedge has his bed next to a wall and his lockers next to the bed, the backs of his lockers make a small room for his bed. She got up and found Wedge asleep in an easy chair, so she eased into the bathroom and started a much-needed shower.

The hot water helped with the throbbing headache she got for her troubles. This was all Wedge's fault anyhow. She grabbed a towel that she always left in there and dried off and went to enter her room and realized that the door was locked. SHIT! Rule #1 - don't lock yourself in the bathroom. She normally locks that door because she doesn't want anyone, including Wedge, rooting around in her things. She tapped on his bathroom door and opened it a crack and he handed her a cup of coffee. "Good morning sunshine."

Surprised that he was up, she took the cup and said, "I locked myself in the bathroom." She was nervous because the towel was small and barely covered her.

He gave Roxie her purse and said, "toss me your keys," and he moved to the side where he couldn't see her digging around for the keys. Most bastards she knows would be standing there hoping to get a little side boob. Her arm extended from his bathroom door, and he took the keys from her, then went out into the hallway and entered her room, a moment later he knocked on her bathroom door. She opened the door, and she was in her room alone, her keys were on her vanity counter.

She dried and brushed out her hair, did it up in a bun then yanked on her uniform. She grabbed her backpack and headed down to the bike garage grabbed her bike and rode off to work. When she got to the block house, he was in the weapons flight office chatting with Master Sergeant Dan Baker and Josh Gravely. She wanted so much to go in there and hear if they were talking about her. They probably were. She'll ask Josh later; he had been straight with her.

She was pondering what they were talking about when Wedge came up behind her and said, "How are you feeling?"

"Huh? Oh, a bit worn out," she lied. She felt like she was run over with a lawn mower.

"I'm going to be over at Load Standardization most of the day. After that would you like to grab dinner?"

"Let's see how I'm feeling..."

"No problem," and off he went. Roxie shook her head, she was pretty fucked up yesterday, but it was all his fault. She wouldn't have gotten so drunk if he wasn't so damn nice to her. She's not quite sure how that logic worked, but she's going to stick with it.