by khizzle
it was ok... you really need to work on your writing and grammar
you slipped in your pov once in the beginning ("You tell me that my pussy isn't doing so well. That it needs to be fucked soon." )
I thought when it said "my pussy" it meant he owned it...like its hers...but really it's his, because she belongs to him...anyways I didn't want to add to the negative Nancy's over here...so good job. :)
I do not like him, Sam I Am. I do not like him in the store, I do not like an asshole boar. master is just a jerk and letting friend choke her is unacceptable. There is no safe way for asphyxia. It is always Russian roulette with a life. Yeah, plenty of folks love it, but I'm not dying for an o.
This is a story posted on a fucking erotica site. It's not exactly expected to be top notch literature.
Thanks for all the feedback. It's the first thing like this I have ever written. It was basically written for someone I know to get off, which that person did, good ;)
About the language. I appreciate the notes on improving my writing skills, grammar and language. English is not my first language and I don't use it daily, I'm from Sweden.
That may not be an excuse for writing poorly as this is an english site but it's my explanation.
About this being the actions of an irresponsible and stupid master I can only say it's pure fiction and fantasy.
I hope someone could come to this anyway.
Having this happen to me is one of my deepest fantasies. I want to be fucked by my boyfriend's friend, and then not know which one it was. It seems like the ultimate slutty act.