Fuck Around and Have Fun Ch. 01

"OH MY GOD... YES, YOU IDIOT! I SAID I WOULD BE THERE!... that's it Roger. Pound me. Yeahhhhhhh... Just go do some of your wannabe evil stuff, you dork!" My hot as hell stepmom Patty (Patricia Heaton) hurriedly hangs up the phone on my dad (Dr Evil).

"God, I love your cock, Roger. Those piercings feel so damn goooooddddddd. Oh my God!" Her eyes roll back in her head as she cums.

Our family butler Roger is doing Patty, doggy style, on her and my dad's bed. His large rod is well known for it's piercings and even a tattoo. It's a jackhammer. Fitting I guess. Ha ha ha. If you're gonna get a tattoo on your dick, make it a fitting one. It's pierced underside... his balls too. Freaky 70 year old dude, but a really attentive butler.

"UHHHHHH! HOLY FUCK! POUND IT HARDER!" Patty directs ol horndog Roger. He obeys, jackhammering his meat... jackhammer... even harder up her vivaciously vibrating, over 60 cunt. He smacks her well toned, nice and firm booty too. "YES!" Patty shoots her pussy wad again, squirting all over that old meat missile as it powers in and up that beautifully awesome, milf pussy.

"Cumming madam. Uhhhhhh!" Roger announces, a big horny grin on his face, cum dumping into my slutty smiling... tongue sticking out of the corner of her mouth... stepmom's pounded out pussy.

"YES! I can feel all your cum racing up my pussy. Pump me full, Roger. Yesssssss!" Patty leans her sweet and sexy, brunette head down on the bed and rides out the cum flood in her cunt. All that warm sperm shooting inside her gives her sparkling sensations throughout her very beautiful body. She bites her quivering lips and coos happily.

My dad is over at the movie studio, working on his newest spectacular. When he's not trying to take over the world with his overly elaborate, but easily stoppable, evil master plans, he's making movies. As a matter of fact, I'm there too, checking things out... Otherwise known as being me...

"YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!! I'M CUMMINGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!" My dad's assistant Frau Farbissina (The Austin Powers Movies) is taking me balls deep up her mature cunt in a storage closet. She's wrapped tight around me, her legs like vice clamps around my waist.

Sexy bitch has a great pussy, I'll give her that. Loud as hell though, but a pussy that'll make you see stars. It's gripping, pumping, throbbing, massaging, and milking me. A full service fucking machine. Holy shit, it feels good!

"TAKE MEEEEEEEEEEE!! FUCK MEEEEEEEEEEE!! DO MEEEEEEEEE!! MOREEEEE!! MOREEEEEEE!! MOREEEEEE!! NOWWWWWWWWWWW!!" Damn, she's horny. My kinda chick. I pound her out, my ten inch monster plunging and pounding away, In and out, harder... Harderrrr... HARDERRRRRRRR!!

"CUMMINGGGGGGGGGGGG!! CUMMINGGGGGGGGGG!! CUMMINGGGGGGGGGGGG!!" Frau screams. She squirts harder than any chick I've ever shoved my dick in. It blasts out of her overstuffed, relentlessly pulsating pussy and shoots across the crowded closet. It splatters boxes, mops, buckets, tons of paper, the fucking wall... everything! Shit!

I smirk, and keep pounding her out, giving... that... loud... ass... chick... the... best... dick... ever! HARDER... HARDER... HARDER... HARDER... HARDER... HARDERRRRRRRR!! FUCK!! I pull out, and she blasts me, and every inch of the closet, with another wave of pussy cream. I lean down and lick her pussy cum bazooka twat, drinking some, and loving it. Sweet fucking pussy nut! Hell fucking yeah!

Frau won't stop screaming. I think I'm gonna go deaf from this crazy broad screaming in my ear, but fuck it. It's some great ass pussy! I slam back up her, kissing her real deep, and fuck the living shit outta her some more. FASTER FASTER FASTER FASTER FASTER FASTERRRRRRRRR!! I fucking cum like a super rocket. It blasts the hell outta my insanely fat rod and completely floods her pussy, sprinkling out onto the floor beneath us. HOLY FUCKING SHIT!

Frau hugs me tight, kissing the shits and giggles outta me and wiggles that superstar cunt all over my cumming cock. It milks out every fucking drop of sticky cream in me. It's like a damn milking machine. SHIT! It's awesome!

"Sexy... sexy... sexy man." Frau kisses all over my face, bright red lip prints adorn my entire, sexually happy face.

I give her a nice booty squeeze and let her down, a quick kiss on those sexy lips of hers, a cocky wink, and I head out to find my dad.

I find out my dad is in his office at the studio. I head up there, looking around at the set. Looks like a space theme. At least he's original.

"Yes, girlfriend, take it, take it and shake it, and bake it, and quake it, and... umm... Oh well... you know what I mean. Really." I can hear my hilariously wannabe evil dad sounding like he's doing some fun stuff in his office. I walk in. Yep. He's fucking his secretary, former Miss America and cable news anchor Gretchen Carlson. She's bent over his desk while my dad has his patented upturned pinkie to the corner of his goofy smirking mouth look on his pale white face, drilling beautiful Gretchen from behind. She's bent over his huge, mahogany desk. She sees me.

"Jamessssssss. Uhhhhhhhhh. Come let me suck your beautiful cock." Gretchen gets what Gretchen wants. I walk over and happily jump up onto my dad's desk, sitting in front of Gretchen's gorgeous head, letting Miss America suck me off. She gulps down half of my big bulging ten inches.

Those lips. Oh yeahhhhhhh. Those lips do their work. Tightly gripping my fat meat, her saliva lubing their journey down my shaft. That sexy mouth is stretched real wide, accepting more of me in. Gretchen bobs that beautiful blonde head of hers, her gorgeous eyes locked right on me the whole glorious time.

"Mmmmmmmmm... I love your cock, James. Mmmmmmmmm." Gretchen mumbles around my huge, hefty rod, spit pouring out of the corners of her puffed out mouth. She bobs even faster on me. I put my hand on the back of her head, ready for blast off.

"Hello son. How are you?" My dad greets me, a ready to pop look on his quasi evil face. I give him a thumbs up. He drills Gretchen hard, shaking his pasty white head like a quasi evil bobble head.

"TAKE IT! YEE HAW! TAKE THAT DICK, MAMA. MAKE DADDY HAPPY!" Dad is getting into it big time. "That pussy is quite breathtaking, dear Gretchen... yes... quite breathtaking indeed." Dad gives his patented evil goofy smirk/half laugh, quasi evil chuckling his wannabe evil ass off as he fucks his beautifully sexy secretary while she blows me awesomely.

"UHHHHHHHHH. Daddy's cumminggggggggg. Yes yes yes yes yesssssss! Ahhhhhh. Cummy in your tummy... I mean in your pussy, my dear. Yesssssss. Cummy in your pussy. Rightttttttt." Yep... he pops, in his own unique way. My dad's skinny nine inches pumps his slimy load in Gretchen's gorgeous, blonde landing strip topped, milf pussy. He grabs her shapely hips and cums, shaking and murmuring to himself.

I shoot my shot too. My thick ropes of jizz blast full force into Gretchen's hard sucking mouth and are quickly drank down. Gretchen adores my cum. She quickly dispatches my big, protein powered load, gulping hard, swallowing faster and faster to stay ahead of the wave of creamy man goo.

"Mmmmmmmmm." Gretchen moans contently, feverishly sucking me dry while she wiggles her sweet blonde pussy on my dad's jizz dumping rod.

"So tasty, James. I love your cum so much." Gretchen smiles up at me, softly sucking my now softening cock. She's so beautiful and sweet. I caress her beauty queen face and smile... my right hand on her head, getting her to swallow more of me down.

I let loose with my piss, shooting a huge torrent of warm, salty urine down her throat. Gretchen smiles so sweet around my soft, piss shooting cock, eagerly guzzling down every drop. I close my eyes and grin my horny ass off, loving every fucking, wonderful second of pissing in Miss America's married mouth. I pull out my phone and take a few pics. Gretchen smiles wide for the camera, sucking on my pissing dick to get every deliciously yellow drop out.

My dad and I talk over his movie. It sounds weird, but hey, that's my dad. I decide to head home with Gretchen. She works from out house and the office so her husband won't get suspicious. We get in my 700 grand black Ferrari and head out while my dad gets ready for his big meeting with a studio exec. That's why he was calling Patty earlier.

While Gretchen blows me beautifully as I drive home... my nice, but kinda weird cousin Spence (The King Of Queens) is picking up my girl, former pornstar Tyra Moore at the airport. We just got engaged. She's gonna be my newest, smoking hot wife. I've got a few. That may sound a little weird... but, if it does... you don't really know me. (Big smile)

"So Tyra... how was your flight?" Spence asks as he drives, staring at her in the mirror while trying not to have an accident. He's licking his lips and grinning lustfully at Tyra's milk chocolate awesomeness. She's tall, thin and has 32G all natural tits. Pure fucking perfection. So amazingly beautiful too. Yeah... I know how to pick em.

"It was fine. There was a creepy older guy that kept staring at my breasts the whole time, but that was about it." Tyra replies. Her truly awesome tits are perfectly displayed in her skin tight, thin, white silk blouse. It's open down past her breasts. Tyra's world class cleavage is eye poppingly perfect. Spence is proving that. He almost hits a car as he stares a hole through my fiancée's huge hooters. He swerves at the last second to avoid the car, but keeps staring in the rear view mirror. He's drooling. Yeah... he's a little creepy. Horny as hell too, but aren't we all.

Tyra shakes her head, a slight smile on her face. She's used to the attention and she knows Spence is relatively harmless so she thinks it's funny more so than creepy.

Tyra decides to have a little fun with my sexually obsessed, but sexually awkward cousin. She's sitting on the back seat looking perfect as always, her short jeans skirt barely cover her supple ass. Her silky smooth, long legs crossed with her hands clasped around her knee. She slowly uncrosses her legs, then crosses them again in the other direction, letting Spence see her white thong. His eyes almost pop out of his pineapple shaped head. He licks his drooling lips faster, swerving again to avoid another car. Tyra giggles, looking to her left.

She grasps the right side of her silk blouse and slowly shakes it, making it open wider around her cleavage. Those 32Gs are almost all exposed to Spence's intensely horny gaze. He swerves again. His cock is ripping through his pants. Tyra can sense it. She turns up the heat, right as Spence quickly unzips his pants, letting his rock hard cock spring out like a jack in the box.

"My breasts do get a lot of attention." Tyra teasingly says. She opens her blouse and looks at them.

"Holy shit!" Spence blurts out in hard gawking shock, making Tyra laugh. He quickly swerves my Bentley once again, his fat cock jumping like it's bouncing on a trampoline.

Tyra smirks, still not looking at him. She plays with her gumdrop nips, slowly pulling em and letting em snap back over and over. "So many guys wanna play with them and fuck them. I wonder how much that old creep on the plane would've paid me to fuck them. Hmmmm." Tyra keeps smirking, knowing what she's doing to Spence. He's ready to cum already and Tyra brings him to the edge perfectly.

"He probably would've wanted to take me into the bathroom and had me kneel down so he could fuck them. What do you think Spence?" Tyra asks, still not looking at Spence, rather looking at her huge heaving breasts as she fondles them, squeezing them and letting them go quickly, repeating the process over and over as Spence almost hits the guard rail on the freeway from swerving so much. Cars fly by, drivers honking and cussing at Spence's bad driving. Tyra giggles again, still looking at her magnificently perfect, smooth, cone shaped, huge, milk chocolate tits.

Spence starts furiously jerking off... while still driving like a sex crazed maniac. Tyra pulls her right tit to her mouth and slowly licks the milk chocolate nipple, softly biting it and grazing it with her teeth, driving Spence crazy. Tyra still won't look at him, but she smirks mischievously. She's an expert cock tease. Spence hand speeds across his fat meat, jerking as fast as humanly possible. He's grunting and groaning, sweating relentlessly and still swerving through traffic. The other drivers scream at him, calling him every colorful word possible in several languages.

Back in my car, Gretchen is working on sucking down her second load of my cum in the car, third overall for the day. That beautiful blonde head is bobbing and swinging wildly, her glistening lips dragging softly, but tightly, up and down my massive meat. Her saliva pours as she sucks harder and harder. Gretchen gets what she wants. She drinks down my cum eruption, gulping down every slimy, gooey drop of sperm I pump out. Oh hell yeah!

Back in my other car, Tyra has Spence ready to erupt. She finally got him to pull over on the side of the freeway so he wouldn't kill them with his distracted driving, staring at her and her remarkably perfect hooters.

"I bet you wanna cover my titties with all that cum you're gonna shoot... don't you, Spence?" Tyra teases, slowly tracing around her bumpy, light brown areolaes, a sweet, innocent, teasing look on her luscious, glossy lips. She slowly slides her tongue across them, licking across them in both directions. So fucking sexy. She finally looks over at Spence. He loses it, cumming everywhere. It erupts from his heaving meat full blast. Tyra laughs, tweaking her nipples, looking down at them, then seductively glancing at Spence. He he stares back at her, his head turned, his hand speeding up and down that jizz bazooka. Waves of thick jizz explode out of his pumping cock everywhere. Dude's gonna have a big mess to clean up in my car.

Spence relaxes after he cums, sweating like crazy, drooling, so obsessed with Tyra's huge tits. He breathes hard, deep breaths, goofy grinning when he finally catches his breath.

"Wow. That was a lot of cum, Spence. Maybe even too much for my titties. Oh well... take me home. I've missed James." Tyra says, smiling. She fixes her blouse and sits back, legs crossed, hands clasped around her knee.

Spence gathers himself, getting some wipes out of the glove compartment and wiping up his cum, tossing them out the window. He knows he's gonna have a lot of cleaning to do, but he knows it was worth it. Tyra is so damn gorgeous. He just grins and wipes, then puts his cock up and drives Tyra home. This time, driving a lot more carefully. Not as many distractions. (Laughing)

Later, by the pool...

I'm relaxing on a lounger with Tyra. She's laying back on me. I've got her 32Gs out getting some sun, her white bikini top pulled to the sides of those magnificent melons. We're stretched out, sharing a margarita as we watch everyone splash around in our huge infinity pool. My idea to put it in. Love that thing.

"Heard you had Spence going hard in the car." I tell Tyra, sipping the margarita as she holds it for me. My hands are occupied with her tits, massaging em and groping em as much as possible.

"Yeah." Tyra laughs. "He was funny. He almost killed us driving, but he was funny. He's sweet. Sometimes kinda creepy, but sweet. I think he likes my tits." We both laugh. Tyra knows full well we all love her huge tits. Milk chocolate mounds of pure awesomeness. I slap em and squeeze em hard, making Tyra coo in delight.

"I told him about the old creep on the plane that kept staring at my tits." Tyra tells me, sipping the drink, then holding it for me to drink. She moans happily as I continue playing with her huge jugs, my hands loving every melon mashing second. I rub her thick, throbbing nips with my thumbs as I manhandle those huge orbs, shaking em and squeezing em with rough love permeating through my big hands.

"He wanted to fuck you. Like the rest of us." I smirk at Tyra. She leans up and kisses me, smiling so sweet.

"You do get to fuck me, baby. Mmmmhmmmm." Tyra winks and moans, licking those glossy lips for me, loving my titty groping.

"We should make a movie about that. About how hot you are and how bad guys... and chicks... wanna fuck you." I suggest. Tyra sips the margarita and thinks about my idea.

"Mmmmmm. Sounds fun. Would they be fucking me? I mean... I've only fucked you since we've been together, babe." Tyra looks back at me and blows me a kiss.

"Hmmmm. What do you think?" I ask my woman. I pinch, roll between my fingers, pull and shake her rubbery nips, letting them snap back, then repeating the process.

"Godddddd. Mmmmmmmmm. I love how you play with my tits, James. Mmmmmmm." Tyra bites her lower lips and writhes on me, her eyes closed as I slap and squeeze her titties, over and over. "That's up to you, babe. I'm yours. I'll do whatever you want. It could be freaky and fun even without the sex part. We could reenact the guy on the plane scenario... and maybe the car stuff with Spence." Tyra suggests. I love it. I don't usually make porn without sex... actually, I never make porn without sex... but I do love the idea of the movie.

Spence walks over to us, dripping wet from the pool. He grabs a towel and dries off, obsessively staring at Tyra's nude titties, all decked out in his blue speedo. It always makes me laugh when he wears it. His chubby, pasty white body in that skimpy speedo is a sight to be seen.

Another of my girls, huge titty adult model Jalande Jaguar comes over and kisses me, then sits beside Tyra and me. She's all decked out in a skimpy white bikini also, just like Tyra. Her massive, 38K ebony melons are on display, bodaciously bouncing for everyone to ogle. Spence does... when he's not ogling Tyra's exposed 32Gs. Tough call for him and his beady eyes.

We all happen to notice the fat bulge in Spence's speedo. Kinda hard not too. Damn thing's so freaking small, but that the whole point... at least comedy wise.

"Looks like Spence is happy to see us, Jalande." Tyra jokes, smirking mischievously at ol Spence. He plays off his speedo tent and tosses the towel on the lounger to my left. He puts his hands on his waist and gawks in earnest at both Tyra and Jalande. Their massive melons are all stare inducing, mammary cones of huge titty awesome. I keep playing with Tyra's. Jalande takes her top off to get some sun on those gigantic ebony jugs.

"Isn't that right, Spence? Your real happy to see us, aren't you?" Tyra asks, lifting her left leg up slowly to gently and teasingly rub up his thigh, smirking as she does. She moves her white stripper pump up and down Spence's short, stubby thigh, barely touching it, making him tremble, then stops about an inch from his speedo. You can feel the blue balls forming in that skimpy ass, blue, banana hammock.

"Spence has a big dick. It must run in the family." Tyra teases.

"It sure does." My dad adds as he comes quasi evil waltzing over unexpectedly. "See." My dad pulls his skinny nine inches out of his flowered swim trunks while he holds and pets his pet cat, Mr Bigglesworth.

His pasty white, evil, bare skin is a distraction... in a funny way. The designer shades he has on makes him look real "Hollywood" and it also makes me laugh... Tyra and Jalande too. My dad is always good for a laugh... quasi evil or not.

"Nice dick, Mr Evil." Tyra compliments my dad.

"Thank you, my dear, but it's Dr Evil. I didn't go through 8 years of evil medical school to be called Mr... thank you very much." Dad being dad. Damn... she's pasty white. It's distracting as hell.

I keep massaging Tyra's milk chocolate mammary mounds while Spence keeps staring at em... and Jalande's too. Poor nerd boy... his eyes don't know where to focus. His dick is sticking out of the top of his speedo though so it's pretty happy either way.