by mrJohnJones
Nicely done! Especially for 2nd wrriting. More?!
one of the best stories i have ever read hopefully a second part will follow
What a terrific way to be taken from the unitiated by a caring brother and equally more caring woman for your first real time.
Well written and quite thoughtful plus the real world presentation.
Actually this was a well-written story, though it's obvious that being able to sing and write poetry are code for "being gay." The guy's afraid he's gay--why don't you just say it? Thank god for all you straight chaps, it turns out not to be true <g>.
You have a smooth way with words and have a knack for presenting the story in a relaxed, thoughtful and sensitive way. I'll be looking for more material from you.
This is a great story, sex is best when it is passionate, deeper then porno fantasy themes, and you have a knack for passion it.
If first time could only be that good for all of us the world would be a better place.
Now I think our hero should get a shot at all the other girls too.
This story was tender, sexy, passionate and all the other emotions that men and women go through when it's their FIRST time. Women should read it because it captures exactly the feelings a young virgin male has. I KNOW, I WAS ONE OF THEM & I FELT, NO, I HAD EXPERIENCED EVERYTHING THIS YOUNG MAN HAD! Women are afraid of pain on their 1st time? I've got news for you, ladies; guys feel this way every time they ask a girl out! You get nervous about being asked out? We get nervous about being turned down if we ask you out! Is it a lose-lose situation or a win-win 1! I wish I could read minds, that would make dating a LOT easier!
Every young man should have a women like this to show and guide him, So as he goes thrugh life he will know how to love a women the right way !!!!!!!!
Wow, that was an incredible girl, if I was that guy I would have .. Ah well, you know :) A beautiful story and poetry too.. Very nice.. cheers Yoron.
What can I say? This is the first story I've read on this site that I thought warranted a response. So here goes nothing.
Intimate, tragic, hopeful, even surprisingly funny at times ('because you're making it hot in here' a funny, but real response to a question). What really drew me in though was all the little details. The descriptions of her perfume, how it just got warmer as she got closer, I couldn't help but feel everything you were describing. In short, I was moved. You're quite a writer and I thank you for sharing this experience with us all!
Or at least, have big pieces of truth mixed in. I remember that awkwardness, unfamiliar feeling of warmth, ineptness with the little hooks ... gawd, that brings back memories.
Am empassioned spirit inspires us all - thank you for your poem and your story. Thomas
I would give this story 10 Stars.
I am in my 70s and this story took me back to high school, I was that nerd, only I never had a Laura and still don't.