Going On

"Then why do I feel so safe with you?" she says.

"Maybe because you don't know me," I say. Ashley giggles, and I fight back a little smile.

"You try to act hard, but it's easy to see you're a gentleman," she says.

"Do you even know why I went to prison?" I say.

"No, but Daddy said it wasn't for hurting your wife or daughter, so whatever else it was, I don't care."

Ashley hugs me. I'm taken aback by it, but I find myself holding her. We sit like this without speaking for a few minutes.

"Devin," Ashley then says, her voice sounding reluctant, "can we keep each other company tonight? I'm not saying you have to love me, but it would sure make me feel better to be with you tonight."

"Are you sure you want that?" I say, bringing my face close to her, and she responds with a soft kiss on the lips.

Three minutes later, we're in my bedroom. She's kissing me softly all over my face. Her eyes are closed. She smells so good, and her warm lips on my skin send a feeling like electricity through my nerve endings. I begin to kiss her as well, spending a lot of time on her neck, her earlobes. I can hear her breathing grow heavy as I kiss her neck.

"Devin, I'm getting so wet," Ashley says, rubbing herself a little over her jeans. I want to take them off, but I am relaxed and unusually patient tonight. I want to prolong this moment as long as possible.

I unbutton the top of her blouse and kiss my way down to her cleavage. She leans back, her eyes closed again. Her breasts are large, and as I cup and squeeze them I have a brief flashback to myself as an eighteen-year-old holding a pair of breasts for the first time, feeling a lust not unlike a hunger. It's been a while since I've felt that way. Somehow Ashley makes me feel young again.

"You act like you've never held a pair of tits before," Ashley says with an amused expression. "Here, let me make it a little easier for you." She unbuttons the rest of her blouse, revealing a pale blue bra with lace on it. She shakes her breasts playfully and giggles. I can't help but smile.

I reach out and take hold of her breasts again. Her nipples press against the fabric of the bra, and I feel them on the tips of my thumbs as I stroke her over the material. I begin to rub her nipples in gentle circles, and she begins to breathe heavily again. Her hand travels back down to her jeans and she rubs herself again, a little harder and longer than before.

With her free hand, she reaches behind her and undoes her bra. It falls into her lap, revealing a set of round, gorgeous bare breasts. Her areolas are large and pale, and her nipples stand out in the dim light of my room. I lean in to her and take her right breast with my hand. I begin to suck her nipple. Her stomach rises and falls rapidly, pressing against my chest as I continue to suck on her nipple. It feels amazing in my mouth. Soon I begin to give attention to her left breast and its equally pretty nipple, and for a few minutes I shift back and forth between the two. I glance up at her every once in a while to see her looking down at me and smiling. I look down and see that she's undone her jeans, and her hand is clearly inside her blue panties.

"What are you doing down there?" I say, smiling.

"Stroking my clit," she says breathlessly.

"Hmm," I say.

"And now," she says, reaching further into her panties, "I'm putting two fingers in my pussy." I see her fingers moving, and I can hear soft, wet sounds coming from between her legs.

I moan and begin to suck harder on her nipples, nibbling on the left one a little, which causes her to moan as well. I move to the right and nibble on that one, too, and suddenly she gives a shudder and moans even harder. She takes her hand out of her panties and shoves it into my mouth. I catch her scent and the taste of her juices at the same time, and I begin to suck hungrily on her fingers. She pulls her fingers out of my mouth and kisses me hard. I feel her tongue enter my mouth. We kiss and moan into each other's mouths, she being in the aftermath of an apparent orgasm.

Ashley pulls away, catching her breath, and then she begins to unbutton my flannel shirt. I watch her as she unbuttons and removes it. Her hands travel over my arms and chest and she seems to be examining me. Her fingers travel over the tattoo on my right arm: a prison tattoo. She leans forward to examine it.

I feel the need to explain myself. "I joined a gang in prison. My heart wasn't in it, but I didn't want to be on my own. It's just the way things were in there."

I study her face as she continues to look at the tattoo. That nervous look returns to her face, or at least that's what I perceive.

"Are you scared?" I say.

"Why would I be scared?" Ashley says softly.

"I just don't want you to think this is what I am. It's hard to explain if you haven't been in that situation."

"It's okay, Devin," she says. "I know what it's like to be afraid of someone, but I'm not afraid of you."

"I'm sorry," I say, looking down.

"For what?"

"For what you went through," I say.

"You had nothing to do with that," she says. "Besides, let's not talk about it. It's over and done with, and right now I'm here with you."

Ashley kisses my shoulder, my chest, and my stomach. She begins to undo my jeans, and I help her remove them. My cock is standing up straight, pushing against the cotton of my boxer shorts. Ashley bites her lip and begins to stroke me through the material. Now it's my turn to close my eyes and breathe heavily. She pulls down my boxers and gently strokes the shaft of my penis, then slides her fingertips across the head.

"God, you're so firm," she says. She cups my balls and then leans way in until I can feel her soft blonde hair on my bare legs. Then there's the feeling of warmth as she wraps her lips around my cock. She gives a moan as she begins to suck on it.

I run my fingers through Ashley's hair, and she turns her eyes up to look at me, and she takes my cock out of her mouth with a "pop" sound, smiles, and licks the head playfully. I smile back at her. She begins to aggressively suck on it, moving her head up and down on it. I feel her tongue on the tip, and I have to concentrate to keep from cumming too quickly.

After a few minutes, she stands up, wipes her mouth, and, catching her breath, says, "I need some attention."

Ashley pulls her jeans down and off, and lies on the bed wearing only her panties. She opens her legs and I notice that the crotch of her underwear is completely soaked. I get between her legs, kiss her thighs, and am about to pull her panties to the side when she puts her hand on my arm.

"Just a second," she says. "I need to tell you something."

"What?" I say softly.

"I'm hairy," she says, and bites her lip.

"I don't... that doesn't bother me," I say.

"Okay, good," she says, sighing in relief. A few seconds later, she adds, "You can continue, if you want."

I pull her panties to the side. Her pussy is covered in fine, very light-brown hair. It is thick, but appears less so because of the light color. Her pussy lips are slightly open, and I can see the little nub of her clitoris, and below that her wet slit, glistening pink. I open her lips with my fingers and see a perfect pair of inner lips around her hole.

I look up at Ashley's face and see that it is red.

"What's wrong?" I say.

"You're examining me," she says, and covers her face with her hand. "Does it look weird?"

"No, it's perfect," I say. "I just like looking at it."

"Oh my gosh," she says, her voice muffled because her hand is still in front of her face.

I smile at her, though she can't see me, and then I begin to lick around the edge of her pussy, just along the outer lips. I can hear her breathing heavily behind her hand. I put my mouth around her vagina and suck her lips into my mouth, and she quickly draws her hand away from her face and grabs the comforter. She gasps and looks up at the ceiling, wide-eyed.

"Is this okay?" I say.

"Yes! Stop talking. Keep going," she says, and looks down at me and smiles just so that I know she's not being too serious.

I remove her panties and return to my spot between her legs. I slide my tongue inside her and can hear her hands gripping the comforter even tighter, and I can feel her pulling it up from the bed. She's gasping and moaning as I fully penetrate her with my tongue.

I explore her for a while, enjoying her taste and concentrating on her breathing and moaning. I take her clit into my mouth and slide two fingers into her vagina, which she seems to really enjoy because she starts grinding against my face and hand.

After a minute or so of this I begin to lick her pussy again. Suddenly, she says, "I want to taste myself, Devin!"

I crawl on top of her and we begin to kiss passionately. She thoroughly licks my tongue and the inside of my mouth, and her hand grasps my cock and begins rubbing it up and down along her slit. The head of my cock slides against her clit and then back down her opening.

For a moment she holds my cock at the entrance to her vagina, and then lets go of it, reaches around behind me with both hands, and pulls me toward her. I feel her vagina swallow every inch of me, and I am nearly overcome with the warmth of her around me.

"Oh God, Devin," she says, gasping and making short little breaths. We look into each other's eyes and she kisses me again.

"Are you okay?" I say, and she nods.

"Do you want me to pull out?"

"Hell no," she says, still gasping. "I want you to fuck me, Devin. Give it to me and cum inside me."

I slide out of her until just the head of my cock is still inside, and then I push it back in. Ashley moans.

"Yes, boy, that's good. Keep doing that, nice and strong," she says. I pull out and push back in again, and continue like this for a while, each time going a little faster and pushing a little harder.

We move together like this, and with her mouth close to my ear I can hear her shallow breathing. She makes little squeaking sounds occasionally as well, especially when I pause while my cock is fully inside her. She is so wet that I have to keep concentrating to avoid cumming. It's difficult, because it has been so long since I have ejaculated, even on my own.

I turn my head and our eyes meet, and as we continue to make love I focus on her eyes, and she focuses on mine as well.

Suddenly, she pulls me in close and kisses me, and then whispers loudly in my ear, "Oh Devin, fuck me harder!"

I begin to thrust harder now, lifting her body slightly each time I push against her. She moans more loudly now, resembling a sound I've heard female porn performers make in videos, and she grips my back tight and pulls me harder towards her each time I thrust.

"Mmm," Ashley moans, "I need to feel your cum inside me. Please, baby, please."

I stop concentrating on keeping myself from cumming and let myself become fully aware of the sensations of making love to her. I feel the warmth and tightness of her vagina around my cock, and the wetness. I feel her breasts pushing against my chest, the feeling of her hard nipples poking me with every thrust. I feel her warm thighs. I feel the soft skin of her sides as I grip her. I can smell her hair, the nice scent of the shampoo she uses.

I am overcome with the sensations and become aware that I'm about to ejaculate. I make a sort of moaning sound.

"Look into my eyes, baby," Ashley says. We look intensely at each other and she whispers the words "Cum, baby, cum inside me." I ejaculate hard inside her, and she gasps and smiles, closing her eyes. For about thirty seconds, my cock spasms, still emptying, and I look down at her smiling face, her eyes still closed. It seems as if she's concentrating on savoring the feeling of my warm semen inside her.

When it's done, she opens her eyes again and says, "I'm out of breath! That was so good."

I just smile back at her and brush a few strands of her hair out of her face. We lay there catching our breath, my cock still hard inside her. I can feel my semen starting to seep around the edges of my shaft as it drips out of her. But it feels so good inside her, so warm, that I don't want to pull out. I reach down and run my fingers through her pubic hair and gently rub her clit, and Ashley gasps again and bites her lip. She begins playfully squeezing my cock with her vaginal muscles, and we both laugh and kiss each other passionately.

After cleaning up and taking showers, we sleep that night in each other's arms. I'm wearing my boxers and Ashley decides to sleep naked since her panties are still wet.

Midway through the night I wake up to the sensation of Ashley with her hand down my boxers, rubbing my cock, which is already hard. I look into her eyes and she is biting her lip playfully, and I know exactly what she wants. We make love a second time, and again fall asleep in each other's arms, her soft breasts squeezed against my chest, her hair partially obscuring her pretty face.

I wake up in the morning to the phone ringing out in the living room.

I pick up. It's Cynthia, my estranged wife.

"Hi, Devin," she says flatly. "Happy belated birthday."

"Oh, thank you," I say, still half-asleep. "You remembered."

"Are you hungover?" she says.

"No, I didn't drink that much last night," I say.

"Are you even allowed to go to the bar?"

"I'm not supposed to," I say. "But as long as my parole officer isn't there, I guess I'm okay."

She sighs on the other end.

"I'll work on that," I say. "I'll try to do better."

"We'll talk about that, okay?" she says. "I've been thinking about it and I want you to be part of Sarah's life again."

"Really?" I say, and I feel tears start to form. "I would love that. Yes, that would be great."

"From what your mom has told me, it sounds like you're trying to put the pieces back together. And I've thought about it and I know that you're not a bad man. You're not a violent man. That fight at the bar, I guess you were just trying to do the right thing."

I don't know how to respond, so I just say, "Mm."

"I don't know if I can forgive you for being there with that girl, but I guess that's something I have to deal with," Cynthia says. She sounds tired.

"Okay," I say.

"Anyway, there's someone else who wants to talk to you," she says. I hear shuffling and muffled talking on the other end of the line.

Then, "Daddy?" I barely recognize my daughter's voice, because she sounds so much older now.

"Sarah!" I say, and there's nothing to stop the tears now.

"Happy birthday, Daddy!" she says. "Oh, 'belated birthday,' Mom says. I don't know what that means."

"Thank you, baby," I say, barely able to get the words out.

"I miss you," Sarah says, and I can hear a quivering in her voice.

"Me too, Sarah," I say, "More than I can say."

I hear sniffling on the other end, sniffling and the sound of my daughter breathing into the phone.

"It sounds like I'll be seeing you soon," I say, choking on the words a little.

"Good," she says. "See you soon, Daddy."

When I hang up the phone, Ashley is standing in the doorway to the living room, wearing just her panties and holding her blouse over her chest. I wipe my eyes and smile, and she smiles back. We sit on the couch and she holds me while I cry into her shoulder.

*****

Sarah is dangling from metal bars on the playground.

"Do you want me to help you down?" I say, holding my hand up to shade my eyes from the bright sun.

"No, I can do this, Daddy," she says. She swings and catches the next bar and tries to keep moving, but it's clear to me that she's out of strength and doesn't want to admit it.

"Ugh, okay, I guess I can't do it. Daddy, pull me down!" Sarah says, and I grab her and ease her down to the ground. She shakes her tired arms and sighs in frustration.

"You did great, even if you didn't make it all the way across," I say.

"But this is a kids' playground," she says. "I should be able to make it across no problem!"

"You're still a kid," I say, grinning.

"I'm in middle school!" Sarah says and slaps my arm.

"My mistake," I say, and put my arm around her shoulder.

We turn towards the part of the playground that's meant for smaller kids. Ashley is waiting at the bottom of the slide for Russell. When he slides down, she picks him up and hugs him. She puts him back down and notices us watching her, and she gives us a smile and a wave.

"I like Ashley," Sarah says. "Is she your girlfriend?"

"Looks like it," I say. "We've been together since my birthday."

"Are you going to marry her?"

"Maybe. We've talked about it."

Sarah looks up at me and smiles. "Good. You need someone to take care of you."

"Yeah, you're probably right," I say, now staring at Ashley, who has taken Russell's hand and is walking toward the picnic table where our lunch is waiting.

Sarah takes my hand and we walk over to them. Ashley greets me with a one-armed hug, as she's still holding Russell's hand. The pleasant sun shines on us.