All Comments on 'Good Neighbours'

and word play and a I Got Ya. TK U MLJ LV NV

I kept waiting for the twist , or something. In my minds eye, I could see this going two or three different ways, but it didn't. The author actually opened a door for a Hitchcock style turn , but he didn't pull the trigger.

3 *'s

Unfortunately it ended just when it got interesting.

Revenge fucks never work.

But I feel unfulfilled at the end. Could have been better I think, taking enigmatic endings a bit too far. Probably been reading too much JPB 

Doesn't need any further enlightenment. Well written little 'affair' scenario. I like a short, succinct story where I can feed my own imagination as to an ending. My own intellect requires nothing further. 'Nice one'.

This was well done. The question at the end was valid. Getting even does not have to be the sane as revenge. Often, revenge goes well past getting even. Nice story.

I liked this story. It was short, got right to the point.

Enough character development to support a simple plot. Real smooth and well written dialogue. Gave it 3*.

Look forward to the next story by Jazz_E_too.

AMerryman

A good plot, ending with a surprise for the wife, just like in this author's story "Stepping Out"...but like in the other story, husband and wife in the end were in the same low level of cheating...It didn't matter who was the first to cheat...In the end both were cheaters...So all possibilities how this marriage will end were open...2*

Got your punchline and point of throwing the act of betrayal back in Penny's face, but there's so much left out that I'm left thinking about all that's missing from this story, not what you put in it. We don't even know what Penny's response is. Which begs the question, what was the point of writing this story? You told us at the beginning of the story this was revenge fucking. And how does a spouse "get even" with adultery?

It is well written, and has an original approach. But without any plot and drama leading up to some sort of resolution, the confrontation between Daniel and Penny seems pointless, or at least uninteresting. Why should we care? Are they going to divorce, are they going to reconcile, will Daniel and Marcia become a couple, will Daniel bring a law suit against Marcia's husband? And how did Marcia discover the affair? And why did Daniel not even know the name of his wife's chiropractor, when her appointments were, how was her treatment progressing, nor notice any change in her demeanor and attitude? But yet Penny could discern that Daniel was fucking around? How? But yet Daniel acted like he had no clue that Penny was fucking around?

So, its great and classic when a story leaves the reader wondering and off balance and in a state of unsatisfied suspense. But it has to be crafted very adroitly so that the reader feels like that is just how the story ended, not that the author was manipulating the reader for some cheap or pointless emotional dissatisfaction. I hope I said that right.

So thank you for your time and effort. You have talent, but this story was only a partial display of that. If that was your goal, congratulations. If you expected us to actually understand why the characters did what they did, and what they will do next, then I must report my failure to get it. But looking forward to another opportunity.

The cheater cheated upon.

You got her reaction perfectly.

Anger at being cheated on and horror at being found out as the first one to cheat.

“the exhilaration of taking the risk”- Not MUCH of a risk, assuming they have proof of his wife cheating first.

Well written. Takes a unlikely scenario and makes it believable.

again in wrong category.Should be in non erotic

Malice or balance?

Intent to cause pain, or to take your 'share' in a now open marriage?

He didn't set things up for a divorce, but since no-fault is the usual way he doesn't need a reason or proof.

He can let her file if she can't accept the 'new normal', which after all she set in motion.

Then it's on her to pay for the lawyers.

Let her look like the hypocrite in court if she wants "It's okay for me but not for you".

You cut it off just before the conflict started. Disappointed.

ending of this story was a complete letdown.

This is the first part of a series, right? If not, please think through what your readers take from this story: a wife cheating with her therapist, for no apparent reason, and perhaps one of other prior betrayals, still has the brass to challenge hubby about his affair, and with no resolution of two marriages.

but too short. No real ending

And as a result it just wound up being average.

Thanks for sharing.

Plain Bob you're not . Good as far as it went but another page of responses would have finished it and gotten a better rating ...3

The story was well told. It was as complete as a story should.be. I compliment the author on resisting the temptation to "finish the story" after creating such rounded, believable characters for the story. LW has been on a downhill slide for about two years. Even established writers appear to be struggling with weak storylines or storylines that have been done to death so it is always gratifying to come across a new author and one who promises so much to look forward to. Thanks

I don't normally agree with "getting even" sex as it complicates an otherwise easy divorce.

Looking forward to Ch 2.

Too bad FinishTheDamnStory died...this is a prime candidate for an additional chapter....

Such stories as this is interesting how the authors could think the future of the couples after the revenge fuck? Only the husband shows he is not cuckold (ACCORDING TO THE MODERN DEFINITION OF THE CUCKOLD)

Duna

to offset the asshole of LIT's 1 vote

Give us a sequel. Loved it!

Perfect account of conflicting emotions and revenge. 5

A lot of fun here. True that he did not get revenge. What he did is an alternative, but there is always the question of why stay together?

Sequel?

I would have given you 5*’s if you had finished the story. As it is I gave you a 3.

Double cheating, no revenge. Again, not finished.

Just not finished

This story might not be a 5, but entertaining, yes it needs a sequel.

Ok

And now? She cheated and he cheated. Who's the winner now?

Both cheated, really who is the winner and what revenge? ... Well written but unfinished... 2 1/2 STARS...

But now they both cheated so what was the point of thinking he could take some moral high ground pointless story

I would have loved to hear the rest of that conversation!! Good story

Well they both went over the cliff on this one, but generally most male writers find it acceptable for the men to cheat but not women.

And rest assured there are a lot of knuckle draggers here who will ok a man cheating if the wife isnt putting out, but if the husband is puttin gout and the wife cheats...well the little fragile boys just wet themselves in anger.

In this case they both are rotten people.

Like it.

Left the ending to the readers.

I am ambiguous and switch between the btbs and reconciliation.??

@iammweasel.

You. Are. An. Idiot.

1. Once a partner... man or woman, betrayed the other in such a manner, all claims on fidelity of the betrayed partner are null and void. There is no longer a marriage to consider.

2. If the protagonist in this story has not been shown that his wife was betraying him, he would not have stepped over the line.

3. Any person who is betrayed in such a manner owes nothing to the betrayer. At all.

4. Someone betrayed in such a manner can have their psyche redeemed by someone outside the relationship... a task that has been forfeited by the betraying partner.

5. This web site is called 'loving wives'. That tends to set the precedent that the person engaging in adventure outside of the standard matrimonial constraints is going to be the woman. If you want to read about men acting like dogs and sometimes getting their comeuppance, go to the web site 'loving husbands'.

Typical for flash stories in this genre. Take it to the ninth inning, then call the game. Not the way to earn more recognition stars.

Nice build up , then you left it with a lot of questions that wanted answered , but somehow ended it with that being okay .kind of like the Korean War -,it never officially ended but it happily stopped .! 4 stars