All Comments on 'Grey'

This whole story/fantasy is a bit too chaotic to be enjoyed. Where is he living? In Lala-land? Unicornbulls, a dog that is not suffering from her wounds? Alex who seems to be half crazed? Grey who sounds as an animal with this name? If You continue this You have to be more rational, maybe there are readers who enjoy a story like this - I don´t. It is interesting but just to bizarre. And this end?? Why is this not chapter 1, you just left everything hanging in the air - if that is how your mind is working I find it just to crazy - not fun at all.

I like it. I hope you do a follow up on this. Maybe it was a dream, they never make sense or it is the start of a good sci-fi / fantasy story. Either way I like the planet you live on sounds eerily similar to mine. Us cooky and quirky ones should stick together. Besides I hate these people who comment and then conveniently hide behind anonymous. If you are "man" enough to shit all over someone's story you should be " man" enough to put your Lit - ID down to. It's free to join. So man up or shut up!

Interesting, I woud really like to know more about this whole situation. I look forward to more,

I stopped reading by the end of the first page. I had no idea what's going on, what is being referred to or anything. I don't mind sci-fi, but I was completely clueless about what was going on here. Definitely not my type of story.

IMHO as a lowly anonymous commenter, a little bit more context would have made your very good writing even better. Everybody has their style and authors don't always have to tell a story in chronological order, but there does have to be a minimum of detail for the plot to make sense, especially in an alternate reality. In parts this really was confusing; perhaps having a beta-reader would help.

I have to tell you that I thought the sexual build-up and actual sex in this submission were ridiculously, sizzlingly hot - yum! - you definitely have a talent for the erotic genre so don't stop. Please tell me there is more of the story to come, otherwise I feel like you would have kind of wasted a great idea - so much potential in terms of plot and sex!

This was brilliant. I really hope there are more chapters to come!

Please tell us more about Grey and Alex and how they had an arranged marriage and the universe they inhabit.