All Comments on 'Half Way to Heaven'

Your story has merit but is trapped with the first person present continous grammatical tense which tends to come off false to the reader. You have potential as an author but I strongly recommend a change in tense. I read part of the story and then skipped to the end. It was just too annoying but I hope you continue to write, just in a different tense. You have a tasty imagination and I'm sure you could provide some interesting stories. Incidentally, the problem was the same with your first story which I didn't even finish. And, dude, I give this criticism with kindness and genuine sincerity. If I didn't think you have potential I'd just rate you as 'hated it' and move on.

Your story conveyed the passion, lust and pleasure just fine.

Give us more stories please!

I'm a little puzzled by the other comment criticising your use of 1st person narrative. It didn't bother me. I thought your story was quite good except a little short. You conveyed his anticipation, desire, arousal and excitement quite well. I'm looking forward to your character's taking Rick's cock. Hope you submit that soon.

that this story could have been better presented in the past tense. But nevertheless it is a good, interesting story about an interesting experience

Your story gave me exactly what I wanted.... the thrill of fantasizing about sucking a big cock until he unloads and fills my mouth with cum.... Thank you....

Wish I was in your shoes. Or at least on your knees ! Loved the story, Wish it was me.

Just a look or a couple of words, then BAM, nsa unadulterated sex.

Being bi for most of my life I know it can happen with the opposite sex, but not as often, and certainly not as good.

Tell us more please

I didn't critisize the use of the first person. That was the only way the story could have been logically told. I simply thought it might have been better if related in the first person, past tense.

In any event, I just re-read it and it, like all of this author's work, it is a fine piece of eortic writing.

The chosen tense is not the issue, and I'm glad the commenter who at first was so critical came back with a more positive second reading. The story rushed through parts which should have been described more fully, but overall it was a good read.

I'll check out more of schuwinggg's work.

Loved the story. I also want to experience the joy of having a cock shhot down my throat and all over my face. The person giving head is actually the one in a position of power. I have done that position and it is perfect to really take it deep. More stories!

I loved your story it's always great to find a cock to suck until it cums in my mouth.

I loved it, especially his description of getting face fucked. My x boy friend would face fuck me when we'd 69 and the hottest part was his musky balls bouncing off my nose when he'd bottom out choking and gagging me. So close and intimate.

Nothing like a good cock sucker story, especially one of an eager first timer finally being able to experience the lust he has felt for the taste of a cock over many years of jerk off fantasies.

I want to be face fucked by a hairy masculine man and have his musky balls resting on my nose so all I can smell is his heated crotch. I want to hold my own cock and jerk it as he fucks my face and his warm low hanging hairy balls lift and fall on my nose. I get his scent over and over as his heavy orbs lift and rest back on my nose as he buries his shaft deep in my mouth. The precum leaks from the big hole in his cock head as I suck his sweet syrup as it flows from his hard veiny dick as he slides in and out of mouth and throat. My eager lips will keep the pressure on his pulsing shaft as my tongue swirls around until I hear him groan and feel his cock swell up as his sticky musky semen spurts forcefully across my tongue and into the back of my throat. I'm groaning at the taste, smell and erotic moment of having a man cum in my mouth as I'm simultaneously spraying my own white warm juice all over my stomach and chest. I finally experience the taste and essence of a man and fulfill my fantasy of being an eager willing cock sucker for a friend in need.