All Comments on 'Hannah and Grace'

Very nicely done, Traustin, you've taken a pair cliches and turned them into a very entertaining little story. I see from your notes that you posted another story several years ago so I'll have to give that a look. You can write well enough so if the earlier story is the same quality as this, I wonder why you haven't written more for the site. One tip: write numbers (especially small numbers) as words rather than figures, it makes the text look so much neater.

Really good and high quality. Thank you;

You successfully managed to condense a lesbian turning story with a solid sex scene and a happily ever after into two LitE pages. It has to be some kind of record. My only criticism is that being so short, it didn't give me much time to care about the characters. Kinda like a 3 minute pop song. It's had some good hooks but I've heard them before and I'm already bored with it. If your intention was to create a fun little puff piece then you were wildly successful, I just wish there had been a bit more depth.