Hattie's Dream

He smiled to himself.

As angry as he was, and confused, by what Hattie had done last night... He'd never seen her quite as happy before. Being a girl really had transformed Hattie's life for the better. She was free, and even when she was faking not knowing things to try and cheer up their sister, she was a bright spark.

Their mum poked her head out of the kitchen, "Cohen. In here, now."

Hattie cringed as he stood up, "I owe you one."

"One?" He said as he crossed by her.

Jess glared between them, "No fair! You're a girl now, Harriet! You two aren't supposed to still have psychic connections. I want a psychic connection with my sister!"

"Just let it go." Hattie muttered. "I really owe him."

His mother had her arms crossed and a glare firmly fixed on her face when he entered her dominion. She was tapping one foot and had a wooden spoon in one hand.

Cohen winced, "If I say Hattie and I worked it out, are you going to be less enraged?"

"Just because your sister didn't tell you she was getting a sexchange is no reason for you to treat her so poorly." His mum snapped, "I know it's a shock, but keep it to yourself. Don't yell at her. Don't scream. I thought I raised you better than that."

He laughed in disbelief, "Eh... Not what got me upset. I met her. Yesterday."

"Yesterday?" His mum said in surprise.

He shrugged, "I went out for a drink with Frank last night. Hattie is one of the girls who joined us playing darts. She thrashed us, like she always does. But she didn't tell me who she was."

"That's... Still no excuse for screaming at her like you did. You overreacted." His mum instantly knew he wasn't giving her the whole story. And that half the story was a lie. She always did.

He nodded, "I'm trying to make it up to her. I thought we could do our usual, and head out for some pool, this afternoon."

"Take Jess with you." She replied, relaxing. "She's been hanging out to see Harriet since she heard. She's always wanted a little sister. Which means she's going to be a little bit over the top."

Cohen smiled, "Mmm. Hattie is humouring her. As if she hasn't already done all the research. But, it'd be good for the two of them to get closer. Guess I'll have to share her."

"Harriet... She looks up to you, you know." His mother said hesitantly, causing Cohen to remember his little sister crouched and looking up at him with her cock in his mouth. Smiling and loving him.

"Eh. Yeah."

She smiled sadly, "You need to be delicate with her. She's not as strong as she seems. This... All of this has been coming for a very long time. Even though it's been a few months, she's still changing. She needs someone to look out for her."

"I don't live here, and she has uni." Cohen tried to cut off that line of thinking. "Maybe Jess can."

"Jess is irresponsible. She'd have Hattie drunk and dancing on tabletops most nights." His mother shook her head, "Please. Just think about it, for your sister. That's all I'm asking."

He couldn't exactly tell her that he was worse, having a one night stand with his sister.

That thought was probably going to haunt him until he died.

---

Lunch was mostly quiet and awkward.

Their mother strongly hinting that Hattie should think about deferring, and taking some time to be herself. That Cohen could help her to see the big city. All the while his sister stared at the floor and mumbled her way through it, saying she was happy with how things were.

It didn't take long after for the three to find an acceptable timing to pile into Cohen's car and head to the local games place.

As they pulled up, Jess spotted something, "Oh, cool! They do that laser thing. What do you say, Hattie? Want to help me hunt down Co?"

"I'm not really up for running." The blonde shook her head, "A nice coffee, and some casual pool, is where it's at. Weren't you just tagging along so you could take off with your boyfriend, without mum knowing?"

Cohen looked at the back seat, "Are you really still dating that jerk, Jess? How many times has he stood you up?"

"Once too often." She growled, "He can't make it. So you two can just deal with me hanging around. And what the hell is going on? You two couldn't face each other at lunch."

"Really?" Cohen said in surprise.

Hattie shrugged, "Just feeling guilty about something. Let it go."

"We meet up like once or twice a year." Jess said accusingly, "You never include me in anything! Always just the two of you. You're my sister now, Hattie you're supposed to be -"

"I saw her yesterday at a bar. Didn't know her, and hit on her." Cohen lied, "Awkward enough for you?"

"Shit. Sorry." Jess held up her hands, "No wonder you're avoiding him. Boring pool sounds best, I guess. I'll just mope around, loveless."

The three headed inside.

Hattie got them drinks as Cohen found them a table and racked up. He was chalking his cue, when he spoke to Jess, "I'm sorry it didn't work out for you, even if I never really liked the guy. Really. Not much I can do, but you've always got my sympathy."

"Mmm." Jess sat in a seat, glumly resting her head and arms atop her knees, "Geeze. Look at Hattie. The guys are like flies, all over her. It isn't remotely fair. I mean, if she told them, none of them would even touch her. But I'm over here, and I'm not even getting second glances."

"Having your brother standing nearby is a pretty decent dick repellent." Cohen tried to reassure her.

Jess actually wasn't that bad looking. She was a brunette, leggy, and if you believed she was a D-cup, you needed your eyes checked. She had a cute set of freckles, and deep brown eyes.

Problem was her fashion sense didn't invite attention.

She wore her hair in a ponytail, always. Her current outfit was a pair of black tracksuit pants, and not the tight kind, paired with an oversized grey hoodie. It was comfortable, but it wasn't exactly the kind of thing to get her laid.

She apparently didn't get that she'd stopped putting in any effort years ago.

"He didn't just stand me up. He cheated on me." Jess said quietly, "I don't know how many times. But he accidentally sent me their cumshots. Twice."

"Shit." Cohen sighed and walked over, giving her a side hug, "Is that why mum was all insistent you come with us? Trying to get you a pick me up?"

"Yeah. I was too embarrassed to tell Hattie, so I just said I'd sneak off... But..."

Lying was a problem in this family, Cohen mused. Everyone lying to protect themselves from everyone else. It shouldn't have come as such a shock that Hattie had lied to him, too.

Though... He wasn't upset that she'd lied.

He wasn't exactly sure what it was that he was upset at her for. Attempting to seduce her own flesh and blood? He hadn't needed much encouragement. For the sex? She had been brilliant. He had been the one who failed to perform.

Maybe it was because she'd given him the tiniest taste of what dating her might be like, and he knew that he couldn't.

He was angry at himself, not at her. Absolutely furious at himself for wanting his own sister. Not just for wanting her. She attracted swarms of guys, she was objectively attractive.

Hattie blew at her hair as she approached, three drinks in hand.

He had enjoyed hanging out with her after the sex almost as much as he had being inside her. She made him laugh and smile, easily. He felt comfortable with her, even now after everything.

Hattie might not have dared to look at him at lunch, but the same wasn't true for him. It was easy to forget his anger.

"Guys fucking suck." Hattie said, putting down the drinks, and handing Jess her soft drink before picking up her coffee and sipping at it, "No offence, big guy."

"If anyone has a right to complain, it's you." He laughed. "How is it, being both sides of the mirror?"

She looked at him in confusion and then slowly shook her head, "No. No, it isn't like that. Even when I had something to dangle, I didn't think like a guy. I haven't been both sides."

"Sorry." He winced, knowing he had put his foot in his mouth.

Jess perked up a little, "So... If it's been a few months... Does that mean you can date? Have dated, or whatever? All healed up?"

"My fur's still growing back." Hattie side stepped the question, "I know you shave, Jess. How do you... Stop the damn itching?"

Jess flicked a look at Cohen and then shrugged, "Make sure you get the ingrown hairs. Um... But I don't. Anymore. I was mostly doing it for... Him. But he's a jerk."

"Hattie's trying to be the little sister you wanted." Cohen said casually, as he lined up his cue and broke, sending the balls scattering across the table and sinking a low ball.

The blonde smiled sheepishly, "Sorry."

Jess shrugged, "I know. You're not any good at hiding things, Hattie. Sorry. And I know you need exactly no help with anything. But... Thanks. For trying."

"I can keep a secret." Hattie said, offended.

Jess deadpanned, "Yeah right."

"I can!"

Jess rolled her eyes, "Toootally. Which is why Cohen's been leaping to your defence. With mum. With me. Tell me I'm wrong - you kissed him. That's why he got mad at you."

"Why would she kiss me?" Cohen said, trying to pretend his heart hadn't become a remarkable imitation of a jackhammer.

Jess held out a hand, "Case in point. Cohen to the rescue. Let's hear it from you, Miss Harriet."

"Um... What he said?" Hattie swallowed nervously.

Her older sister laughed, "Oh wow. You actually did. She's had a crush on you since forever, Co. Don't read into it too much. Hattie's hormones are kinda all over."

The blonde growled, turning and taking her turn, sinking four high balls in quick succession, before putting the cueball into an incredibly annoying position. "Don't pretend you know everything about me, Jess. It's a real ugly look on you."

"Holy shit, you two... Did more than kiss? Frenching?" Jess' eyes went wide, "How much more? Hattie! He's your brother! Our brother!"

"I didn't french him." Hattie glared, giving away for certain that she and Cohen actually had kissed.

Jess looked over at Cohen with trepidation, "Oh. My. God."

Hattie cringed, and Cohen winced.

Jess rubbed her face, "You two... My brother and sister... God damn it! The fuck is wrong with you? Cohen. Your the oldest. You're not supposed to do dumb shit. And Hattie! I mean... Fuck!"

"He didn't know it was me!" Hattie snapped and then winced, "And I'm just lucky he didn't kill me when he found out."

The middle sibling took a deep breath, "Did... Actually, I don't want to know. I don't want to know any of this. Gimme the car keys. I'm going home. Call me when you need it back."

Cohen handed over his keys silently, not having a clue what to say. Jess left, just shaking her head.

He sat down tiredly, "Crap."

"Thank god! She finally left." Hattie said with a grin and bounced over to him, "Don't worry. She's not about to tell anyone anything. You don't need to be all down about it."

He looked up at her with an open mouth in shock.

Hattie's grin broadened even further and she nodded, "Aha. I just wanted to hang out with you, hunk. Now, we can. So... Ready to get whipped? We should make it interesting... What can we bet on?"

"You just told Jess that we..."

"No I didn't. I didn't tell her anything. I let her imagination run wild. Kinda tells you what she daydreams about, doesn't it?" Hattie said with a smirk.

Cohen stared.

Hattie smiled evilly, "Okay. How about this, big guy. If I beat you, you have to kiss me. If you beat me, I'll try and fix things with Jess and be a good girl for the rest of the day."

"Hattie!"

She grinned and shrugged, making him uncertain if she meant it, or just meant to tease him. Will had always enjoyed making him overreact... But Hattie had promised not to bring it up, again.

Cohen crossed his arms, "If you're looking to just play by yourself, let me know and I'll walk home."

"Sheesh." She rolled her eyes, "Jess is going to think she overreacted to nothing. Most you can say is that I kissed you on the cheek when you didn't know who I was. Jess overreacts to everything, and she knows it."

He nodded, "Yeah, I got that part. And I unfortunately agree with you. She'll have talked herself out of it before she gets home. You can manipulate our sister pretty well."

"Consider it payback for all the Hattie-is-a-hottie jealousy." She said with irritation. "I just wanted to be me. And I have to say, everyone trying to treat me different is annoying as shit. I'm not. I just got boobs instead of a dick. It should not be this big a deal."

Cohen sighed, "I'm sorry. I already said that."

"Wasn't really including you in everyone." She shrugged, "Going to take your shot?"

He tried to get the ball out of the position she'd put it, and earned a penalty. Which felt like she was making a point. Nothing he could say or do right now was going that well. "The bet, Hattie."

"Innocent fun." She replied, stretching backwards to put the cue behind her to take a trick shot halfway across the table. She grinned at him, and lazily stretched a little more before she straightened up, "It's hard work staying flexible, you know. Still getting it back after the rehab."

Cohen waited for her to take the penalty, "So you got rid of Jess just so you could flirt outrageously? What happened to the girl who couldn't face me at lunch?"

"Oh, I still feel guilty." She said, leaning over the table in front of him and cocking her ass. "Buuut... Now you know I like you. Like the rest of the world. And I'm becoming a practised hand at not hiding things, when I don't need to. Hell, even mum knows I've got a thing for you, hunk."

He rolled his eyes, "And what would she do if she actually knew?"

Harriet sank two balls with a split, and shrugged, "Probably kick you from the family for touching her poor innocent daughter. Not like she even knows how to get mad at me, anymore. Too awkward and guilty for telling me I wasn't butch enough, when I was a kid."

Cohen sighed heavily, "If I admit it isn't completely one-sided can we go back to how things were, before?"

She paused, looking up from the game at him, "Co... Thinks are like before. It's just you notice when I'm flirting, now. How long have you been my big guy?"

"Eh..." He had a vague recollection of her calling him that back when they lived in the same house, and she needed help on studying for an exam. Hattie had been calling him a hunk now and then, too. He'd figured it was because Will couldn't get a girlfriend. But with the new context, the little brother had been jealous that Cohen had been dating.

Hattie kept looking him in the eye as she sank another split, "Getting it, yet?"

"Since forever." Cohen repeated slowly, "When did... Jess find out? Mum?"

She blushed and missed her shot.

Hattie sipped her coffee, and sighed. "Mum was just plain embarrassing. She thought I was spending too much time on the Internet during my year 12 exams. So she installed parental software on my laptop, that immediately flagged a couple dozen videos and docs in a hidden folder."

"Incest videos are common." Cohen concentrated on his shot.

Hattie laughed bitterly, "Like mum knew that. She doesn't even swear, Co. So she started watching me. Apparently she could tell if I got an email from you because I'd grin like an idiot. If it was from Jess, I'd scowl."

His ball bounced out of the pocket and he sighed, "Well, sucks for you. Doubt she was subtle telling you off."

"Remember last year's marriage rant? That came out of nowhere?" Hattie blew at her hair, "Her way of telling me to get over you and move on. Not for the first time."

Cohen shrugged, "At least you haven't got that today."

"Mmm. Just move in with your brother because you're a delicate little flower." Hattie rolled her eyes, and sank her second to last ball. "Do you need a mint? I'm thrashing you."

"I didn't agree to that."

She grinned at him, "What makes you think I care? Aw, c'mon. It's innocent."

"No, it's not. Anyways... Jess?"

Hattie frowned, "Since... Always? Pretty sure she knew I had a crush before I did. It's kinda funny. Jess always knows me. She's not wrong there. Keeps complaining she never had a little sister... But she did."

His sister stopped pretending to be giving him a chance, sinking one after another until she pocketed the eight. With that she skipped over to him and grinned up at him, "I love you, big guy. Even when I do dumb shit. Especially when I do dumb shit."

He sidestepped her to grab his own coffee before she could do what she was planning, "Just so you don't miss out on the awkwardness, as much as you're making me feel, thing you miss least about being a guy?"

Hattie glared at him, and then smirked, "Oh, that's easy. Morning boners. You know the kind? You're not horny at all but you may as well have a tree branch? Yeah. None of 'em."

He rolled his eyes, "Shock tactics? Nothing is going to compare to my one night stand rocking up at the family reunion."

"I didn't want it to be a one off!" She protested, and then looked at the floor and mumbled, "It just kinda... Had to be."

"Sorry. That was mean of me." He sighed, "What about that suggestion, last night. You design a game, I make it happen for you? We could actually give that a shot, in our spare time. If you wanted."

Her blue eyes sparked to life, "Really?"

"Doubt we'll finish it, but yeah." He shrugged, "Can even do most of it by email. So we can work on it whilst you're at uni and I'm trying to pretend I still have a soul whilst fielding calls."

Hattie grinned at him, "Well, now you have to let me give you a kiss for that one."

She grabbed his arm and leaned up quickly to kiss his cheek before he could protest. However, the kiss wasn't like last night. It may have lingered a little, but it was sisterly and just a demonstration of affection. Making him feel guilty for expecting more... And being disappointed that it wasn't more.

Hattie smiled at him, making him feel worse, before sitting down with her drink, "Mum might have done it badly, but I think I wanna change uni. Not defer, transfer. If... If you don't totally hate me."

"I don't hate you at all." Cohen sighed, "It... I'm supposed to be the responsible one. I know I'm sorta acting cold, but I don't know what else to do."

She looked at him impishly, "Mmm... Bathroom?"

"Hattie! I was being serious."

"So was I." She shrugged, "We're staying at mum's tonight, so that seems like a bad idea. Not like I enjoy it always being a bathroom. I'm not a skank."

Cohen glared, "You know that's not the problem, here."

"Actually I don't." Her jaw tightened, "I don't get the big deal anymore. You like me. I'm crazy about you. You were willing when you had no idea who I was. Is fucking a stranger really that much better?"

"Yes!"

"Well, I think you're wrong." She stuck out her jaw. "I... I fucked up. Lying to you was wrong. You get to be angry at me for lying to you. But that's all I did wrong. It isn't like we can have a two-headed kid. I love you. That should be enough."

"When did you come to that conclusion?" Cohen asked, "I thought we were going to try and... Forget this."

"As if." She scoffed, "You were my first. And nothing in my life has ever felt as right as when you were inside me. I ain't forgetting my second virginity, big guy."

He sighed, and Hattie gave a glum little smile, "I'm sorry. Really. More guilty than I know how to say... But I didn't want a one night stand, and I don't want you to hate me. I just..."

"It's mutual." Cohen rubbed at his face tiredly, "I want you to move in. I want to be able to take you on proper dates. So, no, Hattie, I don't hate you. I hate me."

"Wow. Idiot." Hattie rolled her eyes at him, "You know the easy way out, and you're still pretending like some stupid label matters."