All Comments on 'Havana Club Ch. 01'

It's difficult not to be bothered by this question: why Cuba? Why would they want to set up a branch in Cuba? Nothing happens there. Plus, isn't the private sector in Cuba virtually non-existent? There are so many things that don't make sense. And your writing style doesn't read well. Much too often it feels more like a list of the things being done, than a piece of prose. I think, if you were to alter the writing style and eitehr make the storyline less complicated or explain it better, at least this chapter would be great.

I have to disagree with the other commenter. While I did have some questions about the premise (eg, if it's so dangerous and illegal to send an American, why not just send a Canadaian from the company's "Ontario office"?), however, once I got past that I must say I really enjoy the story you are weaving and the characters you are developing. Contrary to the other commenter, I think your writing style flows quite nicely. Looking forward to reading more of your work.

The story has possibilities and I will continue reading.

However, the ELLEN bit seemed inserted to add sex to the mixture (whether it fit there or not).

There is nothing wrong with letting your story flow, and putting the various elements where they fit naturally.

I have been reading through Strickland's submissions and they have all been rather enjoyable experiences. Interesting characters and interesting plots. Best of all his characters talk and act like adults. Who'd thunk it on this site?

This is an erotic stories site, many authors add gratuitous sex scenes where ever they can squeeze them into the storylines. I don't think for myself that I ever wrote a story around a sex scene. As far as I can tell, I write the stories first, then add all the gratooey I can cram in.

That was a good suggestion to use a Canadian for exploring a potentially lucrative but obviously politically risky situation as say Cuba. I would opinion even better to use a Mexican or Irish consulting firm. Third-party reconnaissance has the advantage for plausible deniability and discretion.

BUT where's the story? Where is the plot-driven danger to a character, that you the reader, would want to invest in?

It is correct that the Cuban economy has been throttled between American Imperialism demanding that Cuba should once again be a giant island whorehouse for America's wealthy elite. And the endemic corruption of Corporate State Socialism. But the island is strategically situated with an educated population. Unusual for an island, Cuba has some valuable natural resources not limited to undeveloped beachfront property, harbors, underutilized farmland, etc......

An unrealized potential is the medical field. Cuba's educational system is pumping out a steady stream of well-trained doctors, nurses and other medical skills. A resource the United States would love to make use of.

Once Obamacare has been thoroughly trashed by the right-wing puppets for the onepercenters. And all medical care is rationed on basis of wealth. Gaining a large number of low-wage Cuban medical personnel could be used as the salve to pretend that those of us, Not born 'booted and spurred', will have available some pretense at medical care.

An amazing amount of research performed in the telling of this story. Love the current political situation written into and among the relationship of the characters. A very good read by a person who has created an impressive environment and characters that are finding themselves moving in a situation where they have no control. Five stars and a must read. -Vriesea

This is fun! I love the combination of interesting business and political story plus hot sex

Oh boy, cloak and dagger and sex, how 007ish. This has all the makings of a great series, well thought out and with numerous directions to go. I definitely look forward to reading more. I appreciate your and your Muse's imagination and abilities to bring it to your story. Thank you for sharing your vision and talents.