All Comments on 'He Shoots, She Yaps'

Not a bad story, but you really need help with misspelled words, incorrect words, and awkward sentences.

For example, I had to read this complicated one several times and I'm still not sure I understand it completely: "As she lay over his chest, back on to him and pushed back down on to his slow moving piston, suspending herself on her hands, he with one hand supporting her lower back and his other hand sending the area around her clit into near riot she cried." It's hard for most people to edit their own work; an editor could be a great deal of help.