All Comments on 'Henry V Pt. 01'

No real ending

Good

place to end chapter 1!

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ swift Justice, well written.

Why do they always say it was just once and then proceed to protect the lover and his family? She has likely destroyed her family without a second thought. 4 stars for now until the epilogue is published.

Hit him in the balls!

5

Points for creativity and originality with the livestreaming as she looks at the pictures of her cheating in real time.

Otherwise still too much of a partial story for my tastes.

I know this was part 1, but instead of the golf course, he should head over to Mr. Wilson's house and introduce himself to Mrs, Wilson as Dennis the Menace. Then offer her the cricket bat.

lol 4*

I feel deprived of your confrontation scene. 5 for your backbone alone.

an amusing one from you Well done No nitpicking from me

Love the story quick and concise

Very nice. Looking forward to the epilogue and the impending “cricket game”. 5 stars.

Need more obviously - 4.0* so far.

Great set up so far and a husband that seems is going to take action. 5*

This had the possibility to be five stars, but you stopped well short of that mark. Don't give me two super short chapters, just give me one complete story next time. You had the premise and the set-up... follow up the next time.

I agree, way too short.

Come on! You have to follow up with a great meal after that appetizer!

I love what you have written here. A man takes action, his wife messing around calls for extreme action. A cricket bat sounds about right. A married man should know NOT to screw around with a married woman. If she gets caught, he gets caught and they both pay. I am all for making him pay dearly. I just can't get any of my stories published with any kind of physical confrontation included. LOL so Frustrating. Good Job. Buster2U

Why bother make an epilogue for a half story? Just finish the damn thing in the first place.

Awaiting the next installment

Yep - FTDS!

Seriously? She took him to a place where the family hangs out and does all that right out in the open? Then she protects him? Epilogue better be divorce court for both the cheaters.

As you said in the preamble there is no conclusion in this part and the ending was left to the readers imagination but maybe too much is left. Perhaps it was writing against a word count constraint but just a little more plot progression may have helpe formulate ideas in my mind. There is not really enough their to empathize with either character making a conclusion difficult.

A good start well written but seems more like an opening chapter than a stand alone story 4*

She couldn't be so stupid as to go to their club with a lover, although I like the cricket bat!

Ohhh lordy..i nearly snitched on myself. I typed out over 6 lines of a rendition of something similar, then remember that fiction and real life sometimes should not cross paths, then deleted it. Why I need to still say something on here who knows. But for the unfortunate souls that may experience such treachery and betrayal as my dad said to me as a child and i now say to my own. "If you cant be good, then be careful" Happy Holidays 🏏🏏🏏🏏🏏

More, more!

Short but to the point. Could have been a 5 but. Oh well.

I see a bad moon arising...I see trouble for everyone on the way. No winners in this one.

There was no need to split a flash story into 2 parts. But you did. So, he now needs to drive the slut to the lover's house and force her to confront the wife. Then drop the cunt off to her parents house. Then the yada, yada can continue.

"I asked for some advice and decided to take that advice and publish the full story." - Bravo! That's been my battle cry for a while now. Why force a story into a 750-word template if it's not a requirement for an event.

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But then, why leave out the conclusion if you have one?

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"He said he was several years younger than me," - He "said" he was? He either was or he wasn't!

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[I answered it. "Hi Bro." He said he was several years younger than me, at times I thought he spoke a different language. "Where's Ginny?"] - This is confusing. Is Les speaking? Then why is he asking Stevie where Ginny is? If, as I think, Stevie is speaking, then there should be a paragraph break after "I answered it," or somewhere before "Where's Ginny?" with possibly an attribution to Stevie.

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Good one, dmann!

First stop should be 17 Arcadia Ave for a conversation with Mrs. Wilson. The cheating slut would chronicle the entire relationship with the asshole and then they wait for his arrival. Divorce filed the next day.

It's a story. It's not realistic. The husband is over-reacting for the sake of the story.

This is the old and overworked American 'right to kill' when wronged. You should not propagate such a vigilante emotion.

The right way is to scold the wife, keep the pictures and divorce her if he wishes, but not to harm her physically.

The back - side of the story is to find out why: And that would make your story interesting.

So far so good

Busted! I love his style.

You need to be more careful with your dialog. The way you wrote it, Ginny was the one who said, "You promised you remained faithful till death do us part, guess we're both liars then."

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Also "promised you remained faithful" is an awkward wording and probably doesn't mean what you meant. Something like "promised you would remain faithful" would probably work better.

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While we're putting that last sentence under a microscope, I will point out that you should have used a semicolon rather than a comma to separate the two clauses.

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Now, to the story overall, I mostly enjoyed it. It was still lacking though, so I'm glad you didn't go with the 750 word version.

A real man and not some small dick cuckold loser bitch boi.

needs a follow up but good so far

Lazy, you're only going to finish it after seeing comments on this chapter? If its already finished in an epilogue just post it all at once

Don’t stop now. You’ve got a really good start here, so go find Charles. Your little Bro can entertain him until you get there.

I like it so far, 5 stars. I'm waiting for what happens in part 2.

Pt 01?

It was just once. In his office. But she knows his address. And it was a mistake that kept her from going further. But she was out with him tonight. Um. She’s lying.

Pretty thin. Lots of potential here for a good story, so come on and tell it. You are definitely not ready for an epilog yet - too much story needs to be filled in yet, first.

He has to ask himself, “Do I want to stay married to a woman who is dumb enough to dance indecently with another man, at a well attended event in their hometown? I would be worried that she might forget to breathe.

A little short for such a good start.

I liked it... as much as it went. Too short; this kind of story rarely hits the 750 count. Need either a re-write with a longer story or a GOOD 2nd part to complete the story. Bob

Some people like short sharp stories, this has pleased them, some don't like that set-up, so I finished it in a second part and people are still not happy.

Never mind, a lot of people have liked Part 1 and I hope people like Part 2. I did enjoy writing both parts, probably Part 1 more.

Les

Liked it. Need the second part with the crying, wailing, smoking craters, and blood running in the street.

Oh yea 5*****

Awesome

Great quick story…… Les should first practice on Ginny with the cricket bat. Really need to have the right swing. Then take care of business with Charles in the car park probably getting into his BMW..

Thanks for writing.

Les is speaking over the last two paragraphs, so there should be no close quote on the next to the last one.

Bring the Burn !!!

There are consequences when you don't play by the rules so male sure you understand them before you marry. Good one 5 stars

Great story!!!! Too short though hahaha Looking forward the epilog ;)

It is good to have a protective brother. Thanks for your writing.

Nice short and to the point.

Nicely done.