All Comments on 'Heroes and Villains Pt. 02'

"The Crimson Soul was obviously well versed in psychology and the human mind. He seemed to have an innate understanding of Holly's psyche. After forty minutes of probing questions..."

Obviously....well versed. Yeah. Heh.

Lazy. Lazy, lazy writer. I don't believe you. The villain is as stupid as the bimbo. And of course you end it with her crying AGAIN. And the more glorious part was her thinking, "Oh! His physique has always made me weak in the knees! I'm in such trouble! This is based solely on what my eyes are seeing and I have no capability to judge to a winning personality for myself!"

Boring characters come across as nothing more than if a five year old was playing with two plastic action figures. "Oh, Darth Helmet! Your helmet is so big!" But then, that's the major problem with the "Mind Control" kink. It's the child-like short-cut for those who have no idea how to interact with people beyond five minutes. Obviously. A well-versed understanding of the human psyche. There's a beautiful irony there.

So...why categorize it here in Sci-Fi, where the readers generally look for immersion, and not Mind Control or Non-Consent? There isn't enough world building here to make it matter in those other categories.

You know...maybe I would follow this if only to riff on it... I almost can't believe you're serious about this intending to be erotic and not a parody of how NOT to write erotica. It's actually pretty good for a laugh. If it was a parody intended for comedic effect, I'd give it high scores and a thumbs up. But you'd have to get a lot more silly yet with the plot(ish). Keep my laughing, boyo.

It would be nice if Holly is able to escape, and turn the tables on the villians, espescially Crimson Soul