Hesitant

Will the dreams and desires of 20-year-old Oğuz in his inner world come true...?

Being a twenty-year-old young man, who has lived a life that could be called boring. Since my parents were civil servants, I could not call myself as being from here, because we have moved so many times from and to so many places; my memories have always been remembered piece by piece. We had an income, and by 'we', I meant me and my sister, Özge. My sister is a twenty-six-year-old dark-skinned, well-built, sexy woman, who chased many men before she got married. After graduating from university, she married my thirty-year-old brother-in-law, İrfan, who was a manager in a high-level company.

Actually, my relationship with my sister was always good. While we were growing up together, we were more like friends. I kept her secrets from our mother most of the time, and was by her side. I must admit, she was always the ideal woman in my eyes; I think I was in love with my sister. After puberty, I always had my sister in my fantasies—I used to sneak and watch her, while she was taking a shower; I used to take pictures of her secretly. As I read stories about brothers and sisters having sex on the internet, and watching sister videos on porn sites, I convinced myself that I wasn't abnormal just because I felt that way.

I had normal girlfriends around me. I am an average, not-very-handsome young man, with neither a thin nor fat body. I had gone on a few dates, but I couldn't go any further than kissing. My first time was when I went to an escort, with my high school friend, and became a man. I've had prostitutes often in my life.

It has been two years since my sister and brother-in-law got married. My brother-in-law is a decent man, he loves my sister, he respects the elders of our family, and he took care of me like his brother. When I saw them happy, I suppressed my feelings and passions for my sister, and lost my interest. When they went somewhere; for example, restaurants or the cinema, they would take me with them. My brother-in-law gave me pocket money from time to time; he supported me to socialize. While I was planning how to convince my parents to send me on vacation after my finals were over, when my sister and her husband came over for dinner one evening. They said that they would also go on a one-week vacation, if my father allowed me. My mother told them, that they were newly married, and insisted that they go alone. My sister convinced my mother by telling our parents that they had their honeymoon last year, and that they were bored alone in the hotel. I was soaring with joy. I thanked both of them.

While we were making preparations for the week we would be going on vacation, my brother-in-law's boss said that there was an emergency in their branch in Morocco, and they had to go there... including my brother-in-law. My dreams were shattered. I had even packed my suitcase. I would not be able to see tourist girls in bikinis or maybe even a few topless women if I were lucky.

However, my brother-in-law insisted, "Oğuz and Özge should take a vacation together for a week," and then Özge and I offered to go again at the end of the month, but he insisted on the two of us, just going as planned.

When we landed at the airport, my heart was restless. I was looking forward to the start of the holiday and throwing myself into the sea, or the pool. When we arrived at the hotel, I was a little upset when I saw that the room was in my parents' name. My brother-in-law had not changed the reservation. There would be a door between me and my sister—we would not be sleeping in the same room at night. But days, they were mine. We immediately decided to get ready and go down to the pool. My sister was dressed in a turquoise bikini and a navy-blue pareo. She looked very sexy.

"If you're finished watching me, shall we go downstairs?" she asked, laughing.

I should've been more careful, I shouldn't have been caught like before. After, we found ourselves a sunbed, and my sister started to cream herself. I was doing the same, but I was interested in her beautiful legs and breasts.

"Can you put some sunscreen on my back, dear?" she said.

Maybe I was going to touch her bare skin for the first time. I did my job with pleasure. My sister was calling my brother-in-law on video and showing him all around. I said hello, and thanked him for the vacation again. "Be careful, and take care of your sister; protect her from any men," he said.

"Nobody will come close; don't worry, brother," I said.

After swimming in the pool for a while, we also tried the water slides. Everything was beautiful. I was lying on my side, sprawling with all its beauty, while my sister was sunbathing, sipping my beer. I was enjoying a situation that I would never have dreamed of coming across, even if I had wanted to. We had taken holidays as a family, but I could never be alone with my sister.

She told me to go to the room to change. She said, "You need to take care of me, when my husband is away, you're my man."

'If I get the chance, I'll show you who's the man,' I said to myself. After the meal, my sister stated that she was tired, and went to lie down in the room. I went out to explore. The hotel was very big and comfortable. I visited the beach, playgrounds, the club, and so on. When I went back to the room, my sister was still asleep, but woke up from the sounds I made. We went out of the room to go swimming for a bit. At the beach, I looked around a little bit, but the girls were either older than me, or owned by them.

My sister asked, "Do you see any beautiful girl you like?"

"One or two girls, but you are more beautiful than them," I said.

She liked my answer. "I can't be humble at all; yes, I am the prettiest," she laughed.

Dinner time was approaching. We were getting ready in the room. My sister was wearing a thin, red, mini summer dress. It suited her dark skin well. The dress was so short, that when she sat on the bed to put on her sandals, I could see her black panties.

"Isn't the dress a little short? Is your husband okay with this?" I couldn't help but ask.

"I took it with me because he didn't come with us, I'm free, anyway; does it look bad? Can I wear it?" she asked, flirtatiously. She smiled. She kissed my neck and we left the room. Was she doing it on purpose?—it was driving me crazy.

After dinner, we took a walk in the hotel. She talked to her husband on the phone again. I took her arm; I was walking with her, with a possessive attitude.

She said, "Look, they'll think I'm your girlfriend, then you can't find a girl for yourself."

I said, "On the contrary, they are more curious and looking at me because a beautiful woman like you is with me." She is smiling.

I got myself a non-alcoholic cocktail from the bar, and got a gin and tonic for my sister, and danced as I approached her. She was dancing to the beat of the music. Of course, I was trying to accompany her—I was not very good—I was shaking. After three glasses of gin and tonic, her eyes started to slide. I don't know if she was aware of it, but I was holding her on her hip during the dance. "Come on, that's enough for tonight, we'll be here tomorrow." When I said that, she made a shot and held my hand. I took her to the room.

She started to undress, ignoring my presence. She was left in her black bra and black thong. She laid on the bed. After taking off her bra, she said, "Goodnight, my dear, turn off the light." I could have sworn that she did it on purpose, her breasts were still in front of me. After being undecided whether to lie next to her, I went into the bathroom and masturbated. This woman was going to drive me crazy.

When I woke up the next morning, my sister woke up and she was taking a shower. The door was half open.

I called out, "When will you come out, sister, I need to pee."

"Come, honey, give me a towel, I'm done."

I didn't look at her, while I was handing her the towel. I turned my head to look the other way, but I could see everything in the mirror—and she knew this. She hugged the towel. While drying her hair, she looked at my penis while I peed. She left the bathroom without saying anything. With my cowardice, I was angry at myself, as I thought that if I had gotten into her bed last night, maybe I could have fucked her because she was high.

My sister and I had never been this close before, we were always distant. She had undressed in front of me last night, and she kind of let me see her naked this morning. I felt like if I was interested a little more, maybe something could happen between us. We went down to breakfast together. We called our parents and my brother-in-law. Everything was going normally, we were laughing and having fun. We went to the beach. This time, my sister wore an orange bikini top and a black string bikini bottom. She asked me to apply cream to her slightly-pink shoulders. I massaged her shoulders, then down her back.

When she said, "Can you apply it on my legs, too, my dear," the world was mine.

My tent was obvious; I rubbed her legs like that, calmly—I went into the sea without sitting down. My fever should have been broken. Five minutes later, my sister came and we swam together. There were animation shows and games on the beach, from time to time; after watching them and having fun, we went to dinner.

Someone approached, and my sister said, "Oh, Tarik, what are you doing here?"

The person she was talking to, was her former boyfriend from university. I remember I had helped my sister, when she went out for a night or two, and I managed my parents. "Where did this faggot come from?" I muttered, clenching my teeth.

He was on vacation, with his wife and child, for the last two-three days, and he introduced us to his wife. The meal was over, then we said goodbye, but I didn't like it at all.

"Did he find this woman and get married after me? What an idiot?" said my sister.

"For him to leave a beautiful, attractive woman like you, he is an idiot who didn't appreciate you." I wanted to raise the feelings of jealousy a little more.

"Forget it, the idiot saw what he lost," she replied.

We had fun in the pool until dinner, and we participated in some of the animations. After dinner, I had to take her to the club again, and relax with a drink and make her get horny. This time, she was wearing a white, deep-low-cut, mini-dress. She wore no bra underneath.

Again, there was a large group at the club. I was carrying drinks. Things were going the way I wanted. My sister was getting the buzz I wanted. At that time, that son of a bitch, Tarik, came to our table. He had left his wife and child in the room and went out by himself. I wonder if his wife would have let him, knowing that he was my sister's ex-boyfriend. He took my sister to the dance. They were dancing very close, with the movement of the crowd. I was holding my drink so tightly, that I almost broke the glass in my hand, on the table. My only thought of this bastard was that he wanted to fuck my sister. After a while, I couldn't hold myself back, when I saw that his hands were clasping my sister's butt.

"I want to dance with my sister," I said, and took my sister from his arms. I started to dance with her in front of him. Tarik hissed from his mouth, before he said goodnight.

My sister was completely ecstatic under the influence of alcohol and music; she was rubbing her body against me, and placing tiny kisses on my neck. I grabbed her hand and pulled her out. She was walking in the hallway with difficulty, and while she was getting support from me, she was trying to kiss me. She was delirious, "Why did you leave me, Tarik, didn't I do whatever you wanted? I even licked your dick, why did you leave me?" As soon as we entered the room, I clung to her lips. I don't know if she thought I was Tarik.

I unzipped her dress, and took it off. Only her black thong remained. I laid her on the bed, like a piece of fine china that would gently break. It had leaked, she was sleeping. "It is now or never," I said to myself.

I started licking those beautiful breasts that I was content to watch last night. My hand slipped into her panties and vagina. I was stroking her with my fingers, making her even more horny. She started to moan with her eyes closed. When I lifted my head from her breasts, our eyes met. My sister woke up and was looking at me.

My sister laughed and said, "Oguz, dear, what are you doing?" She was high. This time it would not be indecision or cowardice.

"I'm making love to the woman I love," I said.

"What, how, really? I'm your older sister, are you in love with me?"

"I've been in love with you since I was a kid, I love you so much, I want you like crazy," I said.

"Ohh, honey, look at you, you look like a kitten. Do you like me very much?"

"I would die for you, I will do whatever you want."

"Hmmm... Okay, it'll stay between us, no one will know, and you'll do whatever I want, promise?"

I was blinded by emotion. For as long as I had wanted her, I didn't care about anything else. She grabbed my face with her hands, and started kissing me. My hand slipped back down into her panties and into her vagina. My sister groaned and started stroking my penis with her hand on the top of my shorts.

I tried to pull her panties down, and they wouldn't come. I looked at her face with my eyes; she lifted her hips slightly. I took off her underwear. I threw it away. Her vagina was wet. I took off my shorts. When I went inside her in one go, she also moaned. I was kissing her like crazy, I was going in and out of her with light rhythms. As I started hitting harder and faster, my groaning sister's voice made me feel like I had found heaven. I wouldn't be able to stand it for much longer. My sister climaxed, trembling, as I took my penis out with one last move, and ejaculated on her belly.

I couldn't believe it. I finally had fucked my older sister, whom I had desired for years—she was even more beautiful than I had imagined. I wanted to fuck her one more time in the shower, so I made a move. I started to lick her vagina, but my sister said, "I'm so tired, we'll do it later, honey, let's go to sleep." We went back to bed together. We fell asleep with our bare bodies wrapped around each other.