All Comments on 'High School Duke'

Enjoyed it with a smile...how about some more?

. . . not the Dukedom.

Nice idea finding out you could inherit a title but the basic premise outlined in the back story is riddled with errors which for me invalidated it. I cannot mark the overall story as I gave up in the first page. A few howlers I noted:

Duke is a heriditery title - but only with a legitimate heir (born in wedlock).

The title of Duke wouldn't be lost for failing to marry - there are usually secondary blood heirs who could inherit as the current Duke of Sutherland's family did on the death of the 4th Duke. If not it would go in abeyance back to the Crown for possible future reassignment.

The IRA haven't bombed Dublin in years - until the Good Friday agreement their main targets were actually in Northern Ireland and some major attacks in the rest of the UK (Eire was seen as a safe haven so in recent years generally not to be attacked).

On the plus side being American is no bar to being legitemately first in line for a Dukedom.

All I know is I liked this story. So I say "Thank you".

You have no idea what adoption means! Foster parents get paid for taking care of children. If a child is adopted then all support from any agency ends because legally they become the child of the adoptive parents which doesn't end at eighteen, either. There is NO financial incentive to adopt and you do a great disservice to the adoption process with your misconceptions.

A fun and fairly unrealistic read. For me it really belongs in the humor category. Also, several bad grammatical errors.

This is really dumb story with a hackneyed plot and it was hysterical. Easily worth 5 stars. Thanks for sharing.

Just spewing diarrhea and vomit onto the page without a single regard to meaning and plot.

Jealousy of the anonymous windbags in the comments makes me grin. Away fools and whine in your gutlessness

Make a couple more!!!

too bad you wasted a friendship. he has known Penelope all thru school and now she is the behind the scenes bitch? you screwed that up.

i rated this at a 3

it started out good but went flat in the last half of story

the time frame was so jumbo, I have read some of your other work

this one could have been better.

loved it, but have to agree that the end felt rushed.

I want more!!!

Ameturish at best.

that was some shitty writing...

A great story that went south at the end. It would have been better to develops the idea that shy Penelope is a perfect match for the emotionally scarred Duke

Loved the story but the end was too rushed. Would start the rewrite around the time the Princess showed up.

Penelope and the princess were outmaneuvered by Abigail. What says that she wasn't just as much a trap as any other? She managed to reel him in after such a short period I would be sooo suspicious.

Oh, yea. The sentence to sentence writing wasn't real bad but the plot development and overall story line sucked.

Don't stop, 'tho. Just need practice. Plenty of practice. And a good editor as well.

I loved the story and and don't agree with the critics

I'm not even convinced it was a romance. I didn't like the end making Penelope the bad guy. Nothing about Abby made much sense either.

Factual inaccuracies.

Sorry but they tend to spoil stories of this type.

Loved the story very well written. Almost want a bit more on after the go back to the estate and get married.

You really did an awesome job putting together love and royalty in this story! That was the best story I have ever heard in my life! Totally AMAZING!!!!

Loved it. Well written. More please.

This story had a nice start, but it ended up being garbage. The main character literally falls in love with the first woman that shows an interest in him. The princess subplot was rushed and full of ridiculous politeness from an antisocial outcast. Penelope is obviously the best girl, but since you couldn't let the main character end up with the second best go, you had to pull a dead ex machine and make Penelope be an evil mastermind. That's poor writing.

You know this is a free site right! This was a fun read, truley enjoyed it. Gave it 5 stars and put in my favorites. Anyone who goes by anon to slam someones creativity is an asshole.

Keep up the good work and thank you!

Cyboji

By page 2 my brain started to hurt and I stopped. To have kept reading I would have risked a labotomy. Absolutely no credibility, I suggest you consider writing greeting cards.

As I was reading my sense of disbelief was seriously strained. Until I remembered this was a romance story (i.e. a fairy tale). Then I relaxed and went along for the ride. Surprise, I had fun.

Thanks fgmntfmgnshn

A great story to read. A perfect romance story at its best. I could feel the emotions and envision the encironment. I was able to live this story. That is the sign of a well written story.

Yes highly unlikely but plausible story none the less. The princess knowing about him that quickly was a stretch but okay I will accept that as artistic license.

Overal great story and I wish it was longer.

Nice concept for a story, even if it’s not very original. The execution, however, was weak. All the girls chasing Dean around the school, him jumping in the pool, was just flat-out silly, and not in an entertaining way. At least it wasn’t for me. Abigail had it right when she called the whole thing “Keystone cops”. I had that exact thought myself, and I didn’t think they were funny either. (Those of you not familiar with the “Keystone Cops”, ask your grandparents.) The story had a good start and I liked the ending, but there was just way too much nonsense in the middle for me.

just a nice fun read. I just kicked back and enjoyed. Thank you

I enjoyed it through the eyes of a young mans fantasy. It started out strong but by the middle it was becoming rushed. you could have built it up a little more and stretched it out some before throwing the end that was coming on fast.. The plot was enjoyable as were the main characters. just wished it was a longer story. all in all it was a good read...

But overall, a great story

I have to agree with others, great start and mid way went weird with the princess and seemed in a hurry. Happy to suspend my disbelief for a story but this really could have been so much more.

I enjoyed reading so much !!!!

I enjoyed it.

Excellent story, but need more chapters

In laments terms, it is similar to a politically motivated

SHOULD BE:

In LAYMEN'S terms, it is similar to a politically motivated

Brought up believing that if you can’t say anything nice don’t say anything at all. In this case I’ll make an exception but will leave it by saying I gave up reading when the Princess turned up.

Good story, but additional chapters would be cool.

Stupid story. Sorry for the harsh words but the whole story was just lame.

Honestly would appreciate more, maybe another chapter that's a bit more fleshed out. I'm not sure if this was intended to be a serious piece or comical but im not disappointed, I've never actually laughed at anything I've read on here but this was pretty good. A bit outrageous but not Stupidly so. I feel like if it was maybe twice as long and a bit more slow paced it would have been even better.

This could use a sequel. Thanks

I agree with all the calls for a sequel, it needs it. I would love to see him going to England, classes in Cambridge, taking over his estate. More trials and tribulations.

What the heck? Penelope was a little too direct with what she did. Shoulda had Smythe step forward and rat her out instead. But an entertaining and nice story still.

Needs a sequel!

No sequel necessary; did Cinderella need a sequel?

Constructive criticism: an offer of advice or correction in the attempt to make a creative endeavor graciously shared with you by a peer be the best it can be via a derivation of the Socratic Method.

Nitpicking and idiotic preference statements with no establishment or sufficient explanation: Not constructive Criticism.

Your story was jolly, upbeat silly and rather reminded me of Fruits Basket (an Anime/ Manga). I liked it quite a bit. I cannot claim to be any authority on royalty or the character one might expect from such but I should hope things are conducted with just a bit more subtlety and stoicism in Jolly Ole England than what was suggested. Also, Royal staff or otherwise people gossip.

Great story with much more potential than used (details, complications, surprises, etc.).

Too bad!

Still 5/5 stars!

Still 5 stars but it could be so much more.

The only thing missing from this otherwise great story is a meaningful revenge on Kimberly. Penelope too but she already lost what she truly wanted.

Disconnected and frankly trite. No pathos to the point that it borders on low comedy.

3 stars