"Ho-Ho-Ho, Merry Christmas...."

"I like it. I want to do this again, I want to be yours."

"What about Mom and Dad? I think they'd murder us if they found out."

"Then I am your secret lover. I'll come and move in with you when you find a place, maybe that'll be enough to convince them to co-sign."

"You can have any man you want though, are you sure?"

"Yes, I want you."

I kissed her softly on her forehead.

"Then I am yours."

"Answer time, what were you saying in the bathroom?"

I sighed, took a deep breath then started talking.

"On my way home last night, Santa Claus crashed on the roadside right in front of me. He was okay but I had him sit in the truck to get warm until the reindeer landed. He was gone by the time the State Trooper stopped to make sure I was okay. To thank me, Santa gave me the power to seduce women just by saying 'ho-ho-ho, Merry Christmas' and it actually worked on Jennifer. I thought it had worked on you too but the Elf or whatever who was in the bathroom told me it didn't work on family but since we're not supposed to have sex, they stripped my power and put me on the naughty list."

Clara just looked at me for a few seconds and then burst out laughing.

"That was fucking brilliant, you kept such a straight face," she said then kissed me.

"It's true."

"I talk to myself sometimes too, mostly to remember stuff, just don't answer yourself and you're not nuts. I love you, Marcus."

I didn't bother trying to convince her. When we decided her bed was better than mine, we ended our night there, just cuddling in our pajamas. When she stretched out as we got into bed, she pulled something from under her pillow with a puzzled look on her face. It was a rough lump of coal, a string tied to a label that just said 'Naughty'. She threw it in her trash and just said 'whatever' and snuggled closer to me.

A month or so later, I was driving home from work, looking forward to making love to Clara after she'd been teasing me with nudes all day. We were fully in love, already packing to move into our apartment together having convinced Mom and Dad to co-sign. My heart jumped a little when I saw Jennifer getting into her Patrol car as I pulled into my driveway. She got out again when she saw me.

"Hey Marcus, got a minute, bud?" she said to me.

"Hi Jennifer, sure," I said.

"So, turns out all the bourbon I was throwing back made my pill fucking useless and I'm pregnant. I'm not the whore this whole neighborhood thinks I am so I know it's yours. You're the only man I've slept with in 3 years since that prick left me. Anyway, you didn't ask for this, my therapist said it might have saved my life, getting help rather than drinking myself to death because I can't drink works for me. I'm going to raise it alone, I am not going to deny you anything though so when he or she asks, you can see them. I'm not going to demand child support or anything either okay, I promise and I'll put that in writing. Take care, okay," she said.

"Okay, you uh, take care too," I replied, I was stunned.

Jennifer looked down, wiped a tear from her eye and hugged me.

"I'm sorry, I know this is a lot but I'm 10 years older than you, I'm a fucking mess with a nice long path of getting better ahead of me but you gave me a gift. I at least wanted you to know," she said.

"I really enjoyed that time with you, you truly are a goddess and I'll cherish the memory forever," I said.

"Well, maybe I'll send you a nicer nude to remember me by than the sneaky one you took when you thought I was sleeping," she said with a grin.

"I uh....."

"I'm not mad, just don't tell anyone or share it or I'll kick your ass. I have to go, gimme a couple of days and I'll send it okay?"

I watched her drive off and walked into the house, still in shock.

"Well, somebody looks like he saw a ghost," laughed Mom as I walked into the lounge.

"I uh, got a woman pregnant," I said.

"How the fuck do you know already, I just took the test yesterday!" yelled Clara.

"Oh fuck..." I said as Mom, Dad and Clara glared at me.....