Home, Finally Home

I think she smiled again, but I wasn't sure. Her face was a swollen blue mess. It hurt to look at her.

"I'm hungry cowboy. I hate asking but could you get me something to eat. I think, preferably some of my mother's chicken soup."

"Jill, if you're OK, I'll go get us something to eat. I'll see if I can find something close to your mom's chicken soup."

"I guess I talk in my sleep. How much do you know about me?"

"FBI agent Jill Jefferson, you have a brother that is also an agent. I think maybe your dad was an agent. I think you need to quit trying to prove to your dad how good an agent you are and just be yourself. I think you are great, and I bet he does too."

"So you know I'm an FBI agent. I'm undercover and have been for two years. Can I trust you to keep that secret also?"

"I'll keep all your secrets, but when you break away from me, you ask no questions and give me a week head start."

"Is the agency after you?"

"No, somebody else is after me. I went to your office in Dallas, and they all but laughed at me. I was told that I had a civil dispute and that had to be settled in court. So I have been in the wind for three years or so. We got a long time to talk about things. I'll get you something to eat."

I went to a nearby restaurant and got the cook to make me a quart of chicken soup. I got me some eggs and bacon and toast. I went back to the motel. Jill was in the floor. She had tried to get up and walk and her feet were so bad she fell and passed out again. I got her up and put her in bed. I put some pillows behind her and fed her the soup. She swore it tasted like her mother's. I ate my eggs and put the rest of her soup in the fridge.

"Jill, I'm going to give you some more scotch. Then I will run you a bath and take you in there and wash you again. I will towel you good and put you back in bed and doctor you. Is this agreeable to you?"

"Cowboy, you ask a lot of a girl, but I appreciate you taking care of me."

I gave her the scotch and ran her a bath. I came back in and she was sitting on the side of the bed. I picked her up and took her in the bathroom. She gave me a kiss on my cheek.

"Can you sit me on the commode, I need to pee." She did her business and looked up at me.

"That burns cowboy, can you pat me with some toilet paper. It hurts too bad to rub it."

"I'll put you in the tub and run some water over it." She agreed with me.

I eased her into the tub. The water irritated her skin again. She said it felt like her feet were on fire. I washed her hair and started washing her body with the liquid soap I had bought. I washed her neck and then her titties, and she looked like she was blushing. I then washed her stomach and down to her vagina. I poured water over it and spread her legs and washed her butt. I then washed her legs and carefully washed her feet and her back.

"My kitty and my butt hole hurt so badly. Thank you for being so gentle with me. You are a wonderful guy, you know that. Are you married?"

"I am not divorced yet, but that will happen one of these days before long."

I got her out of the tub and dried her off. I took her and put her to bed and started doctoring her.

"Cowboy, a girl could get used to this," then she tried to laugh, but it hurt too bad.

The next morning I thought about my tamales. I went to my pickup and got them. It had been cold enough that they were OK. I came back in and put a dozen of them in the microwave. Jill was asleep, and she woke up.

"Cowboy what is that smell? I'm starving from smelling it."

"Jill that is tamales you smell. A friend of mine's wife makes the best in the world."

"Can I have one, please? My mouth is watering from just smelling them."

"You can't just have one. They are like potato chips."

The microwave chimed. I got them out, got a paper plate and put three on a plate for Jill.

"I don't usually share my tamales but since you are injured, I'll relent this time."

She took one out of the corn shuck and took a bite of it. "Oh my god Cowboy, that is the best thing I have ever eaten. How many of these do you have?"

"Jill I'm afraid that if you eat too many of them, they will make you sick."

"Don't bullshit me you stingy shit, you want them all for yourself." I laughed. She tried to.

"Jill, Laura's tamales are one of the few rewards in my life these days. I don't get them but about twice a year, and I drag out eating them for a week. I savor each bite. I have to admit I'm being stingy to you. Here are three more for you. That is half of what I heated up."

"Cowboy, you were right. This third one is making my stomach queasy. Take those other three back. Can you please save them for me for later?"

"I will just for you Jill, maybe when this is all over someday, we can eat our fill of Laura's tamales.

"That's a date Cowboy. Don't you forget it?"

She slowly got better for the next week. She couldn't walk to the bathroom because of her feet so I carried her for the next three or four days. On the fifth day, she hobbled in there and took her bath and soak. She finished and came back in the room.

"Cowboy tell the truth, do you miss giving me baths?" A lot of the swelling had gone down, and I could see her big blue eyes. She laughed, and I could tell she was getting better.

"OK Jill, I do miss giving you baths. Anything else you want to know about?"

"Buddy, I'm sure you got a burner phone. I need to call my mom. Can you help me do that? I don't want them to know where I'm at. They will make a big deal out of it and all the publicity. I can see it now. Incompetent woman FBI agent gets robbed, raped and sodomized while undercover."

"Jill, I told you that you don't have to be superwoman. I meant that, and I'm sure your parents will just be glad to hear from you."

I helped her make the call. She looked at me, and I knew she wanted me to leave and let her have some privacy. I went across the street and got some Hershey bars. I remembered when she was rambling that she mentioned how she wished she had a Hershey.

I came back to the motel room, and she was lying on the bed crying her eyes out.

"Mom is mad because I wouldn't tell her where I am."

"Did you tell her your condition?"

"No, she doesn't need to know that."

"The hell she don't Jill, that is your mother."

"Cowboy, I'm an independent person, I can take care of myself."

I knew I was beating my head against a brick wall with her. I just made my own plan.

"OK Jill, it's your life, and I understand you make your own decisions."

I got in the sack I had brought back and got a big Hershey bar. I waved it in front of her face.

She took it, "Cowboy, how did you know I love these? You are so good to me."

I got a wash cloth and cleaned her face.

"In a week or so, I'm going to know what you look like."

"You are better off not knowing. The real me, might scare you." She smiled.

I got my burner phone. She had erased the number on the call log. She was a smart cookie, but my phone was set so that any number you called was made a contact.

I asked her what she wanted for lunch, and she wanted a burger and fries. I went to the Dairy Queen a block or so away.

I called the number in the contacts.

It rang and a woman answered, "JILL?"

"No ma'am, just listen. I found your daughter in an arroyo off a stream that runs into the Rio Grande. I thought she was dead. She was nearly naked with just a few remnants of clothing hanging on her. She had a bag over her head held by a cord. I felt she was warm when I was taking the bag off so I knew she was alive. When I got the bag off, she said "Water"

I went to my truck and got a canteen and gave her some. Then she told me, "They are coming back and we need to leave."

She passed out. She couldn't have walked anyway because her feet are like raw meat. I carried her and put her in my truck, covered her with a blanket and got out of there. I took her to Junction, Texas and got a motel.

I have never seen anyone beaten so badly. She doesn't look human. I bathed her and doctored her for the last week and a half. She can walk now and is healing, but she needs to be in a hospital. She needs to be checked for STD's and make sure she isn't pregnant. She used my burner phone to call you so I got your number.

"Who are you, sir?"

I'm nobody, ma'am. But you need to get down here and get her. She will hate me for doing this, but she needs her mother. She is the toughest woman I have ever been around, but I told her she doesn't need to be Superwoman around me.

I know she is an FBI agent, and she is undercover. She is worried her father will think she is incompetent. I hope to hell he doesn't think that.

"Mister, we will be there as soon as we can. Where are you?"

"Ma'am, I am in the wind. People are after me. So I am going to tell you where she is. Text me when you are going to arrive. I want to stay with her until just before you get here to make sure she isn't harmed. I won't be here when you come. I don't trust anybody, especially the FBI. You better be straight with me about when you will get here. If you come early and have agents with you, people will die. I guarantee you that. I don't care how smart the FBI thinks they are, I'm smarter. You're talking to someone that has nothing left to lose. The FBI is not after me. Some people worse that the FBI are hunting me. Please, just you and your husband show up alone, and get Jill and take care of her. She is one of the best people I know, and I want what is best for her. Don't let me be mentioned in any report. I need to stay faceless and nameless to live. I took care of Jill. I hope you will let me be."

"We are at a Best Western on Dos Rios Dr., room 141 in Junction, Texas. Get off for the Texas Pecos Trail exit on I-10. It's right there. You can see it."

"Son, this is Jill's father. I promise you, only her mother and I will be there. How is Jill?"

"Sir, she is the toughest woman I have ever been around. If I had been through what she has, I'd be curled up in a fetal position crying like a baby. She looks 100% better than she did. She told me someone was after her so I was afraid to take her to a hospital. She needs to be under a doctor's care and have access to a counselor. She is not as tough as she thinks she is. She is not going to know I have called you until you show up. Tell her to forgive a dumb cowboy who wants the best for her because she is going to be really pissed at me."

"Son, thanks for what you have done. I won't forget it."

"Please do sir, my life is all I got and if they find me I'll lose that but I'll take some of them with me."

"Son, maybe I could help you?"

"I tried you people and you rebuffed me. I won't do that again."

I'm going to hang up. Please give me a text when you are 30 minutes out. I've got to take lunch to Jill."

I had gotten Jill a burger, fries, and a chocolate shake. I felt guilty for outing her to her parents but with people after both of us, it was too dangerous. She needed away from me and to be safely with her parents.

We ate our burgers and I needed to doctor her again. She had gotten where she wasn't shy around me at all. She just pulled the sheet off and let me check her wounds. Most were healing, but I put antibacterial stuff on all of them. The bad bite on her butt was finally healing. I put hydrogen peroxide on it also. Her feet were sore, but the wounds were scabbed and healing. When I doctored her butt, when I was through, I kissed her cheek and she didn't jump or anything, "Cowboy, you are getting awfully friendly with my behind."

"I'm sorry Jill I shouldn't have done that, taking advantage of a poor disabled girl. But you have the cutest little butt, I couldn't help myself."

"Cowboy you have washed my tits, vagina, my butt and seen me naked a hundred times and that is the first sexual remark you have ever made. I was beginning to think you batted for the wrong team."

"Jill, you put up with so many traumas from those thugs I didn't want you to have to think about anything sexual or think I might be capable of doing something to you. If I wasn't such an ugly guy and had so much baggage, I'd be chasing you like that coyote chasing the road runner in the cartoons, beep beep."

She laughed. "Cowboy with all that hair and beard, I have no idea what you look like. I will tell you that I love those Paul Newman eyes you got. You are going to tell me your name and somewhere I might find you in case we get separated, or I'm going to throw one of my 'Jill fits' as my mom calls them."

"Jill, you got a bright future ahead of you. You don't need to be stuck with some loser like me hanging around you. I got no future or prospects of having one. You could get jeopardized by just being around me."

"Cowboy, how many guys you think will want me after they find out I let three dudes rape and dirt chute me for four days, and I didn't kill them or myself?

"Jill, if a guy loves you, that shit won't matter to him. He would want to team up with you and go find the bastards and help you kill them. If he doesn't feel that way, you shouldn't even think about wanting him around you."

"Cowboy, they don't make a lot of guys like you. I know how tender hearted you are and how gentle you are. All this time helping me and doctoring me, you have never looked down on me or insinuated that I did something wrong or that anything is wrong with me."

"Jill, Dammit there is nothing wrong with you. What the hell could be wrong with you?"

"Cowboy we both know that I'm damaged goods now. Men have had me and used me. They took me and did what they wanted to with me and passed me around. I let them do it."

"Bullshit Jill, your feet were bloody stumps from running, you had defensive wounds all over your hands and arms. You had large black marks on your thighs where they pried your legs apart. I pulled part of a tooth from your foot where you kicked it out of one of them and it stuck in your foot. Yeah, you really let them do it. Lady I don't care how tough you are, you can't whip three thugs."

"The tooth..." "I got it in a sandwich bag honey. I didn't have any of my evidence bags with me..."

"You're cute but smart cowboy. Thanks for saving it."

"Jill, I also picked up everything within 10 yards or so of where I found you, just in case. I got it all in a plastic trash bag in my truck."

"Cowboy, you are definitely not just a pretty face." She laughed.

"I wasn't thinking about evidence. I wanted them to think you hadn't been there and keep hunting."

"Jill, I hate what those thugs did to you. They are animals and cruel beyond belief, but none of it reflects on you. Sweetie, you are pure as the driven snow. You can wear the whitest dress you can find when you get married because you are a righteous woman. Don't ever forget that."

She came over to me crying and put her arms around my neck, "Cowboy, you are a wonderful person and thank you so much for saying all those things. I want to believe them."

My phone vibrated and I knew it was time. Her parents must have chartered a plane to get here this fast.

She had her arms around my neck. I pulled her to me and kissed her lips.

"Jill, you are a great person. I'm not a gambler, but I would bet on you. Never forget you got a friend in me. Maybe one day things will be different."

"I got the urge to smoke a cigar. I'll be back in a little while."

"OK cowboy, I haven't gotten your name and other things I need yet."

I went to my truck and got the garbage bag that had all the evidence in it. I went back and tied it around the door knob then I got in my truck and headed for the Gulf coast. I was on a high lonesome now.

Jill picked up around the room. There wasn't much of cowboy's stuff lying around. That puzzled her a little. But he was a pretty neat type person so she didn't think much about it. She lay back on the bed and watched some television. After about 20 minutes she got worried. Where was he going? To get a cigar and he had never smoked around her. What was going on? She got a soft drink out of his cooler. His Scotch was on the dresser. They would have a drink when he got back. She liked that Scotch that he had a lot. She was getting really worried when she heard a knock on the door.

She ran to it and pulled it open saying, "Cowboy, I was getting worried about you!" Then she saw her mom and then her dad behind her.

She was crushed. She screamed, "That do good bastard." She fell to the floor crying. Her mom took her in her arms. "I love him mom and he left. I never met a man like him. Why didn't he tell me he was going? I had so many things I wanted to tell him, needed to tell him."

"Jill baby, he told me on the phone to tell you to forgive a dumb cowboy that was only doing what he thought was best for you."

"Jill, what is this trash bag on the door knob?"

"Oh, that knows it all do good cowboy, took part of one of my assailant's teeth out of my foot that I apparently kicked out and put it in a sandwich bag. He picked up all the evidence within 10 yards of where he found me. He is just handy as a little whisk broom." She started laughing sarcastically and then she was crying again.

"Who is this guy and where is he from? He seems to do everything right. Yet he trusts no one. He told me that if anybody showed up but your mom and I, people would die. He seems to think he had no choice but to just run away from everything."

"Well that dumb cowboy is not as smart as he thinks he is. I got a plastic glass he drank Scotch out of hid, and I need his finger prints off of it to find out who he is. But dad I don't want anyone else to know anything about it. Do you understand?"

"Baby, we will do it just as you want."

"Dad, he went to the FBI in Dallas and they all but laughed at him. They told him his problem was a civil issue that needed to be settled in court. He has been in the wind, as he calls it, ever since."

"Jill we need to pack everything and catch our flight out of San Antonio at 9pm. You have an appointment at the Mayo Clinic tomorrow. Your cowboy told us about what happened to you. Do you want to talk about it?"

"No not really dad, I talked all about it to him. He is one of the nicest and most understanding guys you could ever know. He pretty much knew what happened. He took care of me like I was a baby for the first five days. He bathed me and doctored me and petted me. To be honest, I wouldn't want anybody else to know what all happened to me. I don't think I could talk about it to anybody else."

We got home, and I went to the Mayo Clinic the next day. I had not reported in to my handler so I was listed as missing internally by the FBI. Dad and my brother Bill contacted the Senior Director in charge of my district. He came to the Clinic, and I was treated like a VIP. Dad had filled him in on everything that had happened to me. Dad told him that some anonymous person had found me and took care of me and called dad to come get me.

I was hospitalized, and they did a D&C on me and also found that I had a minor STD. My bowels were impacted and I couldn't remember when I had last had a bowel movement. They had to intervene because I had a blockage. They found DNA in the residue from my colon. I had some minor damage to my anus that they fixed. They did some plastic surgery on my face. I was put on an antibiotic regiment just in case. They ran every test that they thought I needed. I was in the Clinic for two weeks and they let me go home and come back each week for a month to check my progress. At the end of the month, I was pronounced disease free. I had to go back each month for six months.

After about four months, I felt I was back to my old self. I was going to a counselor weekly. She was very good, and we ended up talking a lot about cowboy and how much he helped me. She told me privately that I maybe should look him up. He seemed to be quite a fellow. I told her I agreed.