House of Sand

A sense of unworthiness shrouded me. "Sounds like I'm not fit to wear it."

Anna's voice became rigid. She rolled me onto my back and pounced on me like a lion. She spread her naked legs over my thighs and pushed her nose against mine. "You are worth every bit of it, Maddie. Quit being so destructive of yourself. You are amazing. If you weren't, I would have told you so." As she kissed me, my hairs stood on edge and my mind became fuzzy. She repeated slowly, "amazing." Again, kissing me between each syllable, "a - ma - zing."

"What was her name?" I murmured. "Your grandmother's."

She gleamed. "Her name was Anastasia."

"Oh, that's so sweet," I sang in a high pitch.

"Dad doesn't remember her, but he knew who she was and that she died a fighter. Guess he passed the name on." Anna's mood suddenly shifted to one of distress.

"What's wrong?"

"But if we're getting married, there's something you should know," she said callously.

"What is it?"

She removed herself from me and sat upright. "The school district has a nepotism policy," she muttered.

I sprang up and listened intensively, now sitting cross-legged. "Does that mean you can't remain social studies department head when we're married?"

She shook her head solemnly. "Actually, the policy states that a married couple can't work in the same school."

I widened my eyes. "What? That doesn't make any sense! Why can't we work together?"

"It's a rule," she said plainly. "And we can't change the rule. We can petition, but that likely won't end in our favor." She inhaled deeply before suggesting, "I'll apply for a lateral transfer to another school in the district. That's the only real way to solve the issue."

"No, Baby, no," I whined. "I'm not letting you do that. You've been at Haley for ten years. It's just my first year. Let me be the one who moves. I'd hate to push you out of your spot."

Anna shook her head again, "I'm willing to do it. You don't need to worry."

I jumped, "that's not fair for you. I'll go to a different school."

"No, honey, seriously. I don't mind. Plus, I have a stronger resume: department head, ten years of experience. It's easier for me to get hired. And for you to teach somewhere else your second year -- it's not a good look. On paper, it'll look like you weren't able to handle the job and left. It's just better for you to stay and me to go."

I hugged her tightly, our bare breasts against each other. "Are you sure?" I mumbled into her ear. "I'm willing to do it. You've dug yourself a spot at Haley. You don't have to give that up on account of me."

"I'm sure, Maddie. This marriage is the most important thing in my life. I'd do anything for it -- for you. All I can do--" She choked. "All I can do is thank you for saying yes. You have completed me."

My soul burned with passion. "But why don't we petition first," I begged. "Can't we try that?"

"We can," Anna breathed. "But it won't likely get far. Plus, we really don't need people talking about our sex lives. You know they will. Hell, they were before we were even dating. Remember Jefferson's asinine comment?"

Anna's touch quickly sponged my sorrow. I could not be disappointed or melancholy for long in her presence for she was the ultimate joy in my life; even if I had to quit the best job in the world for her, I would. When our hearts were together, they burned with the passion of a billion stars.

Chapter XIV - Home is my Heaven

June

"Ms. King, would you please come forward?" The principal motioned me to the front of the cafeteria. I knew I was blushing from the attention. I shouldn't have been nervous in front of a crowd of my fellow educators; after all, eight other first-year teachers were to be called to the front. But still, I resented the scrutiny.

Dr. Clamp wrapped her arm around me as she spoke into the microphone. "Ms. King has done a wonderful job this year as a first-year social studies teacher. Her kids love her very much. Let's give her some applause!" My peers applauded on command, and Anna was especially enthusiastic in her cheering. The principal shouted, "and her AP World History pass rate was 88 percent!"

The principal handed me a pin, "and this is for successfully completing one year of service at Haley High School. Thank you so much for everything you've done. We're lucky to have you."

"Thank you very much," I admired as the room went into another round of clapping. Dr. Clamp tightened her hug before turning me loose. I returned to my table as the principal called the next first-year teacher. I could see in Anna's eyes that she wanted to kiss me, but she knew well enough to keep our relationship out of the workplace. She leaned to me and whispered, "I'm proud of you," and my heart erupted with joy.

During the ceremony, the admin provided lunch. Anna, Becca, Ellie, Jim, and I sat at a table. We spoke softly as the ceremony continued. "You guys all packed for the summer?" Becca asked.

"Yup," Anna interjected. "Just gotta get some personal things to take home and then I'm done."

Ellie answered, "same deal here."

Becca looked at me seeking my response. "I guess so," I remarked. "It feels weird leaving for over two months."

Becca waved her hand, "ah, you'll get used to enjoying summers. Just make the most out of it. Take a trip or do something that you wouldn't normally have time to do."

I looked at Anna and shrugged, "we could go somewhere."

"Like where?" Anna giggled. "Like a road trip?"

"What about the beach?" Becca suggested.

"Well," Anna murmured, her voice high-pitched. "We're not beach people. We're more of the walk-through-old-buildings kind of people."

Becca pointed with her fork, "then do that! Plenty of stuff like that to do around the country."

"Maybe," Anna considered. "But we're really focused on getting a house. The market is so tough right now that every house is being bought in a matter of hours."

"Hours?" Jim joined the conversation.

Anna nodded. Her voice was stressed, "we have good credibility. The only thing that's kicking us in the butt is that we're getting a conventional loan, not paying with cash. We've already lost three bids to someone paying with cash instead of a loan."

Jim wondered, "how many people have that kind of cash?"

Anna shifted in her seat, "a lot of people, actually. Most of them just sold their previous home. The issue is that we only get the amount of money based on the appraisal value. So the homeowner can't charge us whatever he wants. If they pay with cash, no appraisal is required, so the homeowner can charge more."

"Sounds silly," Ellie noted.

Anna shrugged. "It is what it is."

"When do we find out what we're teaching next year?" I interjected, changing the subject.

"When does school start?" Anna asked.

"It's like September 7 or something like that," Ellie answered.

"Then you'll find out on September 6," Anna joked.

I widened my eyes and let on a nervous chuckle, "Wait, what?"

Everybody laughed. Anna clarified, "something can always change at the last moment. But your students loved you so much and your scores were excellent, so they'll keep you where you are. It's only the shit teachers who have to worry about getting moved to classes they don't want to teach." Anna took a sip of her drink, winking at me around her cup.

I shook my head, "I'm not as good as y'all say I am."

"But you are!" Anna asserted, speaking with her hands. "You're better than most of the teachers in this school who've been here for dozens of years."

"She's just being humble," Becca declared. "Wait until her ego grows as big as yours," she looked toward Anna.

"I'm not being humble," I returned. "I legitimately don't know why y'all think so highly of me. I feel like I'm messing up all the time."

Anna interjected, "your students love you and they do well in your classes. Your AP pass rate was 88 percent, right? What's the national average?"

"60 percent," I mumbled.

"See?" Anna gestured with her hands. "It was 68 percent with the teacher you replaced. There's 36 students who will have an extra college credit because of you. And more importantly, they're better people because of you."

"You made her blush again," Ellie teased.

I rolled my eyes and continued to eat.

Anna jested, "Maddie will never have a big ego. She's too sweet.

Dr. Clamp finished the roll-call of first-year teachers. Next, she called forward teachers who had completed five years of service followed by those who had completed ten years. Anna was among the latter group. She stood in a line with six others. When Dr. Clamp made it to Anna, she proclaimed, "and Ms. Levitsky has completed her tenth year of teaching at Haley!" A shallow applause rounded the room.

Anna received her gift -- a golden apple -- before Dr. Clamp wrapped her arm around my fiancée. The principal's mood shifted somberly. She spoke, "Ms. Levitsky will also be leaving us this year. She is going across town to teach at Randhawa High." Some teachers in the crowd groaned in disappointment. Dr. Clamp livened again, "but-- Ms. Levitsky is getting married. Whoo!" The cafeteria erupted in cheers, quite similarly to La Mer.

Dr. Clamp gestured toward me. "Ms. Levitsky and Ms. King are to be married in September." An even deeper howl of support resounded from our coworkers. Most of them already knew, but they were animated nonetheless. A handful of people sat and refused to clap, Jefferson among them, but the overwhelming majority rose to their feet in admiration. I stood too and gave a short bow with my head. I quickly flashed the ring on my finger, sparking a light chuckle from the crowd. I looked at Anna, whose eyes were fixed on me. Suddenly, the group of people vanished and it was just me and her alone in the cafeteria. She winked; I nearly lost control.

The end of the workday meant the first day of summer vacation. We left and immediately drove into Virginia to tour more houses. This had become something of an afternoon ritual as purchasing a home was always a fight among ten other couples.

"That was nice," I remarked as we pulled onto the roadway.

"It was," she agreed. "And congratulations on year one." She chuckled amorously.

"I'm going to miss you."

Anna joked, "we're getting married, dear. We're going to live together."

I sighed playfully, "you know what I mean. It was nice having you down the hallway. I could rely on you -- sorta like a crutch. Who am I supposed to rely on now?"

"Hmm," Anna hummed. "Becca is reliable. So is Ellie, provided you don't tell her anything you don't want the world to know. Jim is stubborn, but he's a good guy. And Dr. Clamp loves you; talk to her from time to time. You're gonna be fine. But you can always call if you need advice immediately."

'Thanks, Babe," I buzzed.

"Where are we going first?" Anna inquired.

"Oh!" I jumped. I pulled out my phone. "We're meeting Michelle in Arlington. GPS says it's twenty minutes away."

Michelle, the real estate agent, was a middle-aged woman, a tall and lanky brunette. She led us on a scavenger hunt around Virginia, touring house after house. While visiting our first house, she offered a unique piece of advice: "If you don't feel like you'd fist-fight someone for this house, it's not for you. If you have any doubts, pass it by." We took her expertise to heart. But that was a month ago. By June, the house-hunting dream had become more of a panic as Anna's lease was set to expire in July.

We went to the first house of the day. Next, the second. Then the third and fourth.

In the fifth house, we stood in the open foyer, peering around like stray cats. "This one is a thirty-minute drive to downtown Washington," Michelle commented, fiddling with Google maps. It's listed at $275,000 and was built in 1987.

"It's pretty," I noted, clinging to Anna's side. "It's got a big kitchen."

We wandered the home, nitpicking each detail. "These cabinets are old," Anna observed.

"And this bathtub -- it needs work," I pointed out.

Michelle commented, "you can always ask the seller to do the work for you, but that makes your offer less likely to be chosen. And you can do it yourself, but that can get pricey, especially if you don't know what you're doing."

"I did a lot of handy work growing up," Anna revealed. "Painting, flooring, drywalling. But this house needs a little too much work for the price." She whispered, "let's look at another house. You good with that?"

I nodded, "yeah."

By the time we visited the sixth house of the day, Anna and I were overwhelmed. Each home had something intriguing, but also a glaring issue. Perhaps maintenance would be required, or the price was too high, or the neighborhood was too risky. And this sixth house of the day was the thirtieth overall.

It was in Chantilly, Virginia, a thirty-four-minute drive to work, according to Michelle.

"This one's a lot smaller, but it's in a nicer neighborhood," Michelle noted. "1,400 square feet," she verified from her clipboard. The yard was spacious and the neighborhood was serene. We paraded up the brick steps and over the threshold. "It's beautiful," Anna commented, peering around the empty foyer.

"Indeed," Michelle agreed. "Hardwood floors, and it looks well-kept and clean too."

"I've always wanted a fireplace," I pointed. "And look at that window!" I rejoiced.

"Lots of natural light," Michelle added.

I meandered around the house like a child in a candy shop, Anna following closely behind. "This dishwasher is relatively new, and the stove - it's a gas stove. That's awesome!"

Anna enjoyed my excitement and was perhaps more interested in my happiness than the house itself. As we traversed, a growing sense of urgency planted into my mind like a blooming flower. It was gorgeous: spacious rooms, updated amenities, and two glorious bathrooms.

We wandered to the bedroom. "What do you think, sweetie?" Anna leaned toward me.

"It's amazing," I exploded. "This is the one."

"You're right," she agreed. She mumbled so Michelle couldn't hear, "imagine making love in this room and being as loud as you want. No old ladies living below you complaining about the sex."

"Oh my God," I retorted, my womanhood flaring.

"What?" Anna giggled.

"I want to do it now," I flirted.

Anna's shoulders jiggled in laughter, "I mean, we can."

"No, we can't," I shunned. "It's not our house and we have someone with us." I whispered, "but there's even a place outside where we can see the stars."

"And a big bathtub," Anna added. "Big enough to share a bath. No detachable shower head, though, but we can add one," she winked.

"What do we think?" Michelle called from the living room.

"It's fantastic," I claimed, squeezing Anna's hand.

Anna looked at me with sincerity, "wanna make an offer?"

"Yes," I exclaimed, my heart leaping from my chest. "This is it. But only if you agree with me."

She kissed me on the lips, once again overwhelming me with love. "Then this is where we will live, Maddie. I have that amazing feeling too. Our future will be here."

Michelle came into the bedroom but waited to interrupt until Anna and I finished slobbering over one another.

"They're asking $290,000," Michelle said. "I'll tell you now that you're probably not getting it for less than that. The sellers probably won't budge on that price. There have been four tours in this house today already, so it seems to be quite popular."

"Can we afford a $290,000 home?" Anna looked toward Michelle.

She put on her glasses and studied her clipboard, making use of her calculator. A few minutes later she answered, "Based on your combined income of $150,000, great credit scores, low debt, and county property taxes -- you'd be able to afford up to $450,000. That's what your mortgage company approved you for. But I would recommend never going anywhere near your limit. That makes you more attractive buyers. So, $290,000 is a fair price for your budget.

"Then we'll offer $300,000, or more if it means we don't lose it to anyone else." Anna squeezed my hand in return.

"Jesus," I mumbled. "This house would only cost $150,000 where I'm from. But I'd only make half the salary."

"How much would closing costs be," Anna inquired. "And the monthly payment?"

Michelle deferred to her clipboard again. "I can only estimate, but when you include the mortgage, taxes, and insurance in escrow--" She paused and clicked her tongue as she sought the answer on the paper. "For a thirty-year loan, your monthly payment will be somewhere between $1,700 and $1,900 per month, depending on the type of insurance you get, your down payment, your credit, and your percentage rate. But property tax is a b-word around Washington, and that's what adds so much to the monthly payment."

Anna noted, "before we moved in together, our combined rent was $2,900 per month." She gently lifted my hand with hers as she said "we," further exciting me.

Michelle continued, "for closing costs, that includes my fee, the lawyer, the downpayment, and other miscellaneous charges -- you'd need to wire about 25,000 dollars at once."

A knot formed in my throat and Anna stretched a kink out of her neck. "$25,000?" I formed with my lips.

"Doable," Anna murmured. She insisted, "So, let's offer $300,000."

The agent smiled, "$300,000?"

Anna and I nodded in unison.

"Fantastic." She looked at her watch, "let me hurry home and type out this contract. They're due tonight, so we want to make sure we get it in. Keep an eye on your email 'cause I'll send it as soon as it's ready.

"Amazing," I said, my voice running dry.

When we returned to our car, I asked, "Baby, are you sure we can afford that? We don't have $25,000."

"We do," she assured. "I've been saving."

"You don't have $25,000, do you?"

"I do," she reassured. "We wouldn't have gotten approved for a conventional loan if they didn't see that amount in my bank account when they checked. Also, $15,000 of that is the downpayment, which will come off the top of the price. So if we offer $300,000, the loan will only be $285,000. But trust me, I've been saving."

"For how long?" I scrunched my face.

"For years," she looked at me longingly. "I've been saving for this. I've been saving for you and me -- even before I knew you, I knew I'd meet someone amazing one day and would want to spend my life with her."

I mumbled, "but -- but that's not fair -- not fair for you. I only have a couple of thousand. You'd be paying the brunt of the fees."

"Who cares?" She shrugged. "When we're married, there's no money that's mine. It's ours. I love you enough to pay most of the costs. I love you, Maddie. I wouldn't have it any other way."

I wrapped my arms around her head and slobbered all over her. "You always say the right thing, Anna. Pulling my heartstrings."

"We're buying this house," she announced. "And we're going to love it."

Chapter XV - The Closet

"So, what's the plan for tomorrow?" Anna cooed, sitting across from me at the table. "It's summer."

"I think I'm going to see my parents tomorrow," I said coldly.

"What's wrong?" Anna asked attentively.

"It's time," I roused.

"For what?" She furled in curiosity. "Do you mean--?"

"Yeah, coming out to my parents," my voice faded. I already felt my body falling to pieces.

Anna's face illuminated. "Seriously?"

"Yeah," I breathed. "It's time. I know I have to do it, but I don't know if I can go through with it."

She came to me and rested her hand on my shoulder. "I'm so proud of you, Maddie. And you'll be fine. You're a strong woman."

"Thanks," I puckered my lips. "I need to do this by myself, though. I love you, but if this goes south -- and I think it will -- it's best that you're not there."